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Story Name: The Ultimate Consumption

Rating: M/NC-17

Genre: Romance/Hurt/Comfort

Word Count: 12,253

Summary: Edward is shy, awkward, and lonely. He yearns for something all consuming, something to give him the ultimate high. He just might find what he is looking for in a force to be reckoned with.

~ E*M~

I always strived to reach my stairway to a prosperous and successful life, this life; my life could be what I dreamed for it to be. I was always told by my father that life could be only what you made it. Though, my own life wasn't for me to make uniquely; to follow my own way, to swim through the dream seas of distorted surrealism, remodel abstractionism and stand in the eccentrically erotic puddle of expressionism- only to travel through these phases and come out more rounded, less gilded; something of raw arousal, vastly knowledgeable, enviously wise, someone that can only be satisfied by lustrous caresses and not by things from the outside world. I yearned to become a diverse person and to be loved for the awkward person people proclaimed me to be.

These things I furiously pondered but cowardly refrain from executing.

Instead, I followed the advice and guidance of my preacher father, though in truth, I would say it was more like an order that I was commanded to heed by. I wouldn't dear go against him, for that was a sin in itself- just like my father followed the bible religiously, I followed my father religiously. I was always quiet, never adventuring into the Chicago streets of ' Babylon Society ', as he liked to call it, I studied the steps to come into the ministry, and I courted a woman that was chosen by him, "she's a good God fearing woman, who will keep a good house like she was breed to."

My days were routine, if I stepped out of line I quickly learned my place, and the way I learned was by any means necessary on his part, 'never spare the rod'. To me the worse from him were his verbal shouting's and baths of holy oil that he throw on me, claiming I was possessed by the devils demons for talking back to him or not agreeing with some of his views; those were the times I felt truly lifeless.

My mother was a breeze of cold air in the blazing desert; my relief. She would sneak me books of James Joyce, Homer, Dante Alighieri, poems of Maya Angelo, Eager Allen Poe, and Robert Frost. My favorite book out of all of them was Alice Walker's The Color Purple. She gave me liberal magazines, comics, music of blues and rock n' roll like Ray Charles, Rolling Stones, B.B King and Led Zeppelin. The musical works that truly intrigued me where the classical compositions' of famous composers. But what I remember most is her giving me an anatomy book, "for you to discover God's unique creation of the body." That is when I fell in love with the idea of becoming a doctor; I knew then that it was my calling.

We hid this from my father.

I loved both of my parents with all I had. And when they both became ill within an 8th mouth time period my world crumbled. Dad had been diagnosed with prostate cancer, he was still given a chance at surviving but he refused "the devils poison", instead he wanted to survivor and possibly die without the help of medication. Mom had already had a weak heart so the stress of dad refusing treatment only added to her weakening body. I took care of both of them. Seven months later dad died. I felt ashamed for not feeling much grief. One month later on my 19th birthday I found my mother dead on the bed holding my father's pillow, clutching it to her heart. I cried hard, harder and harder.

I had to get away from there and for the first time in my life I was going to be living my life. I transferred colleges and finished my residency in Washington. I had lied, yes lied to my father about what I was studying, my mother knew and fully supported me because she understood it was my calling. At the age of 26 I was the top medical doctor at B-JWHU making a comforting living.

Only problem is that I am lonely and still very much lacking experience. And good Lord was I feeling its effect.

"Dr. Masen, how nice of you to come back to the real world," Turning I see my little pixie devil of a nurse assistant, Alice, bouncing up and down in her set. "Oh Alice forgive me, I just got lost in thought, sorry." I tell her sincerely.

"No need for apologies, damn doc, you're too damn sappy for your own good. You're such a sweet pie; I just want to take a long savoring bit out of you." She says in a seductive voice. She does this on purpose; I know it because she loves the reaction she gets from me. Right on cue I, feel my cheeks burning fire.

"Ha, there it is!" Alice squeals. Embarrassed I turn my body back towards the white medical broad behind me. I hate when she does that. I feel too vulnerable.

"Aw, I'm sorry Doc, but you know I can't resist doing that to you."

"Yeah well," I know she means well, but it's just annoying that I give such a visual reaction. Sometimes I wish it was a significant other whispering sweet nothings in my ear, suavely uttering their words in thick lushes of erotic juices as we make our love like honey; sticky and slow. Deeper and deeper we push into each other, winding our bodies sultrily slow. Afterwards we reminisce of our strong desire spilling out of us like streams of glistening sparks; the room basking heavily with traces of our griping arousal.

This is what I want, what I need, what I crave. Something like I see Alice has with her husband Jasper. Their marriage is a beautiful thing, something all consuming. When they fight, they fight with love, when they love, their love spark flames. They do not pretend their marriage is perfect; it isn't and I have seen that for myself but they strive and fight for what they have. They are a unit; equal in everything, except when it comes to clothing that is. Alice wears the pants in that department. That being said, I idolize what they fight to keep. Not to mention their beautiful children Bella and Seth. I just hope I am blessed with someone special one day.

"One day Edward and one day very soon," Alice must have sensed my longing. She is always in tuned in that way. Now, she has a serious expression on her face. Uh-oh.

"Edward, you will be rewarded for all the good you do with your endless compassion and your patience. It just hasn't been your time yet. You needed to grow and you did. You needed to see things and you did. Those things have made you strong, experienced; some good and some bad, and knowledgeable. Edward you are way past your time, your mind is that of a 60 year old withholding all that wisdom. And what you have been through is what has prepared you for what is to come."

"Edward accept what you are about to receive. I know you will because of your thirst for it but don't doubt yourself. That doubt is going to be very dangerous for you. You have been through hell and back and from now on these changes are going to be good. Not always perfect but hell what's perfect." I am completed flummoxed by my little cryptic devils speech. I shouldn't be surprised because Alice has always been intuitive. A little bit too intuitive maybe I should medicate her with something. But this time she almost seems convinced of something.

"Alice."

"No doc, don't say anything just listen to what the hell I said and stop being so damn stubborn. Oh yeah, Saturday since we are both going to be on vacation …."

Oh no she doesn't, I knew it was her! "Alice I know you where behind giving me that vacation. I don't need one."

"Bullshit, you haven't had a vacation since you been here and when you're here dammit I have to be here too. And I want a goddamn vacation! So you listen to me, you are going to thank me for these three weeks I got for you and your not going to have to worry about them calling you since they hired three more ER doctors. So shut the hell up and let me finish." She huffs out, clearly frustrated.

"Yes ma'am, please continue."

"That's better."

"Now, like the hell I was saying. Saturday I am coming to your house to clean out that damn closet of ours. Yeah, I've seen the shit you have been buying and honestly I am offended. I thought I taught you better than that."

Good God sometimes I really want to strangle her. I don't know Jasper puts up with this woman.

"So Alice, I am guessing I should be handing over my card to you?"

She gives me that beautifully annoying smile that I have a love/hate thing going on with.

"Precisely Dr. E." She states sweetly.

"I swear you're going to break me."

"Once again bullshit, I am one of the reason that that bank account of yours is spilling over. Don't think it's because of the money they pay from this job. My investment wisdom helps you out. Wasn't I the one who protected your investment when that whole recession happened? You know I had a feeling something was going to happen and not a week before I pulled out, BAM! The shit went down to hell. So you're welcome jackass." I am starting to get the feeling that she doesn't understand how blessed that I am to have her in my life but I can't help put pull a joke on her.

"Well I am sure Jasper appreciates it to. He does the same thing as me and the shopping sprees you go on would truly break him. You know I kind of feel sorry for him. He's married to an addict. I should really talk to him about putting you in rehab."

Throwing a ball of paper at me she immaturely sticks out her tongue, giving me the Alice stare which is my cue that I have thoroughly pissed her off. I went over and gave her a hug.

"You know I am very grateful for what you do for me Alice, you know I love you. You, Jasper and the kids are the only family I have. You and Jasper have been so good to me and a shoulder for me to cry on. Gave me a place to stay, even giving me clothes on my back when I had nothing. I'll be forever grateful for you guys."

She hugs me back in a grip that is strong for her petite frame.

"Yeah I know you are jackass, so let me do this and you're all forgiven. You don't want to hurt my feelings even more then you already have, do you?" She gives me the puppy dog gaze.

"Seriously woman, I just don't know what to do with you. But I love you, you little devil all the same." I say handing over my credit card to her, with her squealing with glee. "Just don't break me Alice."

"Please like you can even tell. Seriously Edward, I think you are probably the richest doctor in the world. But with the heart you have you give half of it away. You know I love you more for that." She says with a gracious smile on her face. I love that I have someone to admire me. It makes me fill worthy.

"All we have to do now is get your sexy firm ass out of that damn apartment of yours."

"Alice please, my patients need me."

"Oh don't; please don't give me that shit. Dr. E, you are young though you act as if you are a 40- year -old prude sometimes, you are gorgeous in a very awkward, nerd with glasses sort of way, and hell if you gave these whores of Babylon a chance, anyone of them would jump on that big sausage you call your cock."

Oh Lord, help me. "Alice please!" I scolded. I'm sure I was turning bell pepper red. "Not in the work place Alice." I begged her.

"Come on, you think half of the nurses in this hospital don't know your hung like a horse. Remember you go commando and your scrubs are thin. You really don't realize that do you?" Kill me now. Honestly I never paid much attention.

"Ugh …" I palm my face.

"Anyways your Romeo is coming." What just did she say, surly she meant Juliet.

"You mean Juliet." Alice stares at me hard, a smirk playing on her face.

"Yeah, right Juliet. Whatever you say doc."

"Alice what is that supposed to mean?"

"Ok doc, we have been friends for years now so I am going to be blunt. You may not know it nor do these skanky STD infected whores they call nurses in this building do, but you like what I like, and that my dear handsome young doctor is thick hard cock."

I wasn't even going to try to debate with her on this. Alice just ….knew things, I am a person that was pretty liberal, I still had a strong religious faith but I refused to think that God hated those who chose a different orientation like my father did. I believe God made people how they are born. People just don't become gay, given sometimes there are situations that tips their desire for different genders but reality, science, and life has taught me people are born that way, and there is absolutely no reason God would love them any less.

"I'm right aren't I? I know because you are not even trying to deny it. Yeah I'm a bad bitch. I know real shit." She says smiling at me.

"Alice, you might be right…maybe but I've never had the experience so how do I even know?"

"Oh you're going to find out real soon." She says giving me that annoying smile.

"And what does that mean. Alice if y- …" BEEP, BEEP. My pager goes off signaling an emergency, it just had to go off at this moment.

"We'll finish this later." I sighed, giving her a pointed look, resulting in her rolling her eyes in true Alice form.

The rest of the day was completely busy and exhausting. I had one patient die on me. Jasper and I worked hard to save the 13 year old girl hit by a drunk driver. She never regained consciousness. Her mother was in complete and utter shock while her father screamed a heart wrenching wail I have never heard before. I saw him fall to his knees in blinding pain, clenching his heart. This 35 year old man had had a heart attack. We did all we could for him but the rest was left up to him. I don't think he had the will to live anymore without his one and only daughter. The mother was still in shock with her hand still placed over her heart hugging her daughter's pillow she slept on. It reminded me of how I found my mother.

The next day the father died. Once again I had to tell a member from this family they had lost one of their loved ones, the mother. I just had a feeling she wasn't going to make it. She was lying on the hospital bed still clutching her daughters' pillow and now her husband's wedding ring. She turned her head towards me and just shook her head. She knew what I was going to tell her. So I didn't verbalize it. She sobbed in the inside of her body. I think that was the worst kind of crying I have ever seen. I watched silently holding her hand as she let go of her life. No will was left in her. I knew this but I didn't say anything because if I tired to reason with her or save her I just knew, I had to feeling I would be truly damning her life. Her inside sobs turned to whimpers of pain. She wasn't physically injured; she was emotionally and mentally dying.

From this situation I understood again the power of true love. This family was a single unit and they couldn't survive without each other.

"You'll understand one day." She told me in a weak, voice grabbing my hand.

"I can see you haven't experienced it, but one day you will understand the power of all consuming love. It's beautiful really. Its internal, its eternity." I didn't say anything, for there was no reason to. She was at peace with her fate and I was given something to look forward to.

She pulled her hand from mine, bringing it up to cradle the pillow and wedding ring, closing her eyes. She signed her last breath and fall into a sleep she would never wake up from.

I was so glad that my shift was over and my three week vacation was starting. Alice was right; I did need the time off. I left in a haste to get away from there. She reminded me so much of my mother whom I missed very much. I was so lonely without my mother and father. Yes, I had Alice, Jasper and the kids but nothing can replace real family. No matter how screwed up it was. I yearned for something to fill what I knew I was missing.

Arriving at my apartment I decided that I was going to just ride, to drive and just explore. I never in the seven years I've lived here been outside of the city. I phoned Jasper to let him know of my plan and to tell Alice for me, sending my love to the kids.

Driving into Washington's countryside was truly a beautiful and exhilarating experience. Trees of huge oaks and willow cascaded the landscape, luscious greens filled my vision, lakes, mountains, wild flowers and ponds added to the mystery of the land. The ranches were far and wide. The sky was hauntingly hypnotizing; invoking envious colors of desire and mystifying natural amazement for its observer.

It is then that I noticed the sky was eerily blue. Heaven was crying its wrath upon the waiting blades of vibrant green blades. And it was not showing any mercy. It was roaring its power, showing brut dominance.

And I, being the idiot that I am didn't check the weather before I started this drive and not to mention I was completely lost and running low on gas. For me to seemingly be so smart this was not my proudest moment.

The storm was not letting up at all. I couldn't believe my luck when my car gave out just when it started to rain.

"Oh great."

There was no shelter at all for miles, it was really secluded, and then I remember the beautiful ranch that I passed not 5 minutes ago. I had to risk it and hope like hell they let me stay there. Getting out of the car I grab my duffel bag and I run fast to my destination.

I finally reach the white wooded gates which are closed, locking the long dirt road ahead with a no trespassing sign on the gate. I have to do the illegal because my life depends on it, so I throw my duffel bag over the gate and climb it landing on my feet.

I ran and after about 3 minutes I reach the beautiful two story farm house. It has a lot of character. I also notice that someone is home because of the 2010 Ford-F-150 parked in the yard. It looks black but I can't tell because the sky is dark and I am getting extremely exhausted.

I make my way to the porch, up the step, drop my bag by my feet and knock on the door. I barley got to my third knock when the door opened to a beautiful Adonis/Ares god before me. He looks strong and deliciously lethal; he had a badass- do- not- fuck- with- me look to him. Completely dominate. He seemed to be a little older than my 26 years, though extremely fitting in his age.

I notice a faint scare that only added to his beauty on top of his left eyebrow. This Ares eyes where the color of bright azurite blue; beautifully strange. He had the perfect bone structure, nothing boyish about it, his jaw structure and check bones were strong, prominent and defined, breathtakingly manly. His lips were full and plump, with his bottom lip thicker and pouter then his upper lip. His hair was thick in its straight platinum blonde state. He was taller than my 5'11 about 6'2. I could tell that he was very defined through his tight white cotton shirt and his rugged jeans hung low, despite his homely look something about him seemed very proper and well put together. He was nothing short of …spectacular.

I must have been staring because he loudly cleared his throat, obviously trying to get my attention.

"Um, I'm sorry to disturb you sir and trespass on your property but my car ran out of gas and the storm is getting really bad. I really didn't know what else to do other than to try my luck here. I umm…. I'm sorry I can go …" I said keeping my head low suddenly feeling embarrassed and shy.

"Oh do not worry about it. I just have rowdy teenagers who seems it fun to trash others property. I'm surprised you made it this far. Please come in to get warm." God his voice was sexy.

"You… you really don't mind?"

"No I really don't mind. You seem like a nice person and if you aren't I am more than capable when it comes to protecting myself." He chuckles out but I also hear the faint hint of seriousness in his voice.

I wanted to say oh yes I see that but I didn't want to risk being shot or something. He stepped aside to let me in and as I passed him I was assaulted by his spicy, tangy sent. His house was warm and cozy with colors of different shades of dark reds, all kinds of dark and light browns, faded yellows, forest greens, big couches and full pillows filled the room with a big fire place burning. It was a real home.

"Do you mind me asking what happened?' He asked.

Turning towards the god I feel my cheeks turning red and I see that he is smirking.

"Well I decided to take a little road trip since I am on a much needed vacation from the hospital, I'm an ER doctor. I have never traveled to the country side so I just drove, not checking the weather and hear I am. Oh, I'm Edward by the way." I reach out to take his hand. Something told me not to let this go.

"Carlisle." He whispers still holding my hand.

"Nice to meet you."

"You too. You are very lucky to make it here. The storm is getting worse."

"Yeah I know…." And on point a loud crackling sound echoes through the house. I look to Carlisle to see his reaction when I catch him looking at me.

"I hope I am not too blunt, but you seem very young to be a doctor." He says.

I blush at this mumbling my age, with him telling me he is thirty-four, much to my surprise. I guessed he was older than me but not almost to his mid-thirties. He was one hot thirty-four year old.

"Oh I am so sorry! You need to get out of those clothes. I'll show you were you can change and if you're hungry I have dinner warmed up and ready. I'd love some company." He gives me a bright smile.

I finish getting dressed and go down stairs to join Carlisle for dinner. We talk a lot getting to know each other and go to bed. I called Jasper to let him know what was going on and that I was still going to continue my vacation. For the next two weeks Carlisle and I got to know each other. He asked me if I just wanted to stay at his ranch and travel around his land in which I agreed to because it is truly beautiful and I wanted to know more about him. He even took me on a ride with his favorite horse. I watched him work on his ranch even though I couldn't help much because I needed my hands in top shape for surgeries, I still tried. When I did try, Carlisle, would give me a stern look telling me he would be darned if he risked me doing something with my hands in order to help him when they were used for saving lives. We also swam in his huge lake, went fishing in the streams, and walked in the woods exploring nature.

Steadily I became drawn to him. He is so different. I also learned that he is the owner of a well known chain of tattoo shops in the city, and he told me about his time in the army, which he was very open about especially me being a stranger. I told him so and he just looked at me and smiled saying that he was comfortable around me. I even told him about my personal life, from my parents and there death and my last case at the hospital; only Alice and Jasper knew about my life. We had very deep conversations about our want, fears, and goals. For the first time in my life I felt alive; I was truly falling for someone whom I couldn't have.

I awake on my last day here and used the guest bathroom to shower and get ready. Today I am feeling uneasy because I am going to have to leave this place, leave Carlisle who has become an easy friend to me. But my emotions towards him are nothing of a friendly nature nor are my feelings. In three short weeks love is filling my heart. Love that I have for Carlisle, in three weeks I fell hard, right now though, I am in agony. I make my way down the stairs and smell bacon cooking. Turning the corner I spot Carlisle in about the same outfit I met him in but his shirt is blue and his jeans are hugging his nice firm round behind, when he binds down to pick up the spoon he dropped, his jeans rid low and I can see the crack in his ass. He's going commando.

"Stop eyeing me and come get some breakfast." He says not even turning around. I've been caught red handed. What if he is upset or one of those ignorant bigots like some can be.

"NO...no….no I um wasn't…. I wasn't … I'm not like that…" I try to stutter out, backing away from the kitchen ready to making a bolt for it as I see Carlisle making his way towards me. He looks hungry and determined for something. Like a lethal lion.

Now he is standing in front of me pushing my body against the wall, putting both of his hands on the either side of my head, with his face inches from mine. He flushed his body to mine, which is when I discover he is hard; extremely hard.

"Oh don't lie to me Edward. I saw the way you were looking at me when you first showed up and over the past few weeks. I want you to know I don't plan on letting you go anytime soon. That spark meant something and I've been alone too long and so have you. So if your thinking about running you can fucking stop thinking about it because from now on your mine and baby I am more than willing to be yours."

"I uh …" I try to get out but he grinds his length to my equally hard cock. The groans escaping me are all most embarrassing.

"Shh… baby you're not denying me. I don't take well to rejection especially when it comes to something I want, need and deeply care about and love, that's you." He says seductively in my ear while he bits it. I draw in sharp breaths, groaning from pleasure. He keeps rocking his hips to mine, reaching down to left up both of my legs wrapping them around his waist. I instantly hug his neck for more support.

"You like that don't you baby?"

All I can do it groan as he bits and licks my neck. He feels so good against me. But then he stops. I look at him in frustration and whimper as he lowers me down.

"Carlisle why…"

"Cause suga I'm not gonna take you against the wall of our kitchen for the first time. I would like to spend the rest of the day with you in my arms. You are different and I don't want to mess it up." It didn't escape me that he said "our kitchen".

"Our?" I say quirking up an eyebrow.

Carlisle roughly grabs me by my shirt, flushing our bodies together as he fiercely looks me into my eyes, "Yes, ours." Then he licks me from my chin up to my bottom lip tracing his tongue underneath it.

All I can think is I'm sure as hell don't want to wait.

We spend the rest of the day cuddled up with each other and talking about the future. We work out how we would see each other with him coming to visit me at my apartment and I would stay at his house on the weekends. It works out perfect because his shops are in town and it doesn't take long to get there. Then something very important dawns on me, I know Carlisle is very experienced and is outwardly gay. I even tell him that this is new to me coming out in which he told me he would help me get through this. But I still have to tell him.

I turn my body so I am facing him on my side with his arms still tightly around me. This is where I belong.

"Carlisle, I have to tell you something."

"What's wrong baby?" He asks in a worried tone, eyes almost frighten.

"Am I rushing you? I can go as slow as you need." He franticly rambles out, his breathing almost labored.

"No Carlisle, I promise it's not that it's just that…. God this is so embarrassing. Please don't laugh at me and if you don't want me I'll understand. I'm a virgin." I barley whisper out.

"Oh thank God. I thought you didn't want to be my boyfriend anymore. Sunshine that is nothing to be ashamed of." He tells me sincerely.

"But I'm 26 and I've never had sex or a kiss…" I whine out. I feel my cheeks burning red.

"Edward, look at me. You have nothing to be ashamed of. When that time comes we will figure it out. I want, I need to take it slow in that department. I've only had quick hook-ups and used sex as a substitute for things. I am falling for you hard and fast Edward and you deserve to be treated like the special person you are and I intend on doing just that. You are my man and I treat the people I care about like royalty, and you suga plum are going to be lavished." He draws.

"Now, sit up for me." I do as he says. He sits up straight, grabs me by my forearms bringing me to straddle his lap.

"I think you are way over do for your first kiss, my beautiful green eyed angel." He whispers huskily, holding my face in his hands.

I hold my breath and look him into his eyes, weird honey gold meeting strange smoldering blue. I see something smoothing and all consuming that I have been yearning for, for years.

"Please Carlisle, don't make me wait any longer." I panted out. It felt as if my heart was going to burst out of my chest. His comforting erotic scent surrounds me. It's manly and strong just like him. I feel his soft plump lips on mine. Carlisle then slightly parts my lips taking my bottom lip in between his. I'm breathing so hard through my nose it's almost embarrassing.

Carlisle then whispers lightly pulling upon my parted lips, "Just relax and breathe calmly." I do as he says and focus on my breathing.

I feel him slide his tongue against my bottom lip demanding entries. I open my mouth to collide my tongue against his. His taste is so enticing, we both groan in pleasure. Carlisle continues to explore my open valley, pulling me closer, we both are so desperate to discover uncharted lands of our caressing silks. I tighten my grip around his neck, aching to be lost in him; never in my life time would I have thought something so raw and pure would be happening to me. He makes me feel cherished and wanted as he makes love to my mouth.

His grip around my neck and waist tightens as I move to break away for air but I am unable to do so. I attempt again to push him away but it only earns be a very loud and menacing growl from Carlisle as he yanks me back to him.

"Don't you ever fucking pull away from me again. I need you" His eyes are dark and daring. I'm utterly turned on by this. But I still need to breath.

I whimper into his mouth. "Carlisle … can't." I open my eyes to see him completely lost in this kiss once again.

In one sudden movement Carlisle catches me by my waist and throws me, yes throws me on the couch. He gets up on his knees, setting on his shins, he fiery large hands move to the back of my calves and he roughly yanks me to him. My thighs are on either side of his hips, slightly lifting my ass in the air. I can feel his cock pressed up against my jean covered ass cheeks. I have only dreamed in being in this position.

"Carlisle please I want you. I don't want to wait."

I then reach out to bring him to lie on top of me.

"God Edward you feel so fucking good. Your fucking taste makes me feel so primal. I don't think I restrain myself." He says as he nuzzles my neck. I have never, ever heard Carlisle cruse as much as he is doing now, I would be lying if I said that I didn't enjoy his dirty mouth.

"Then don't …. I want this… don't make me wait." Making my point I buck my hips into his to show him I meant every word. Carlisle moans loudly and holds my hips down away from his.

"Babe we can't…..we have to slow down." Carlisle pants out.

"But don't you want me … I thought." This is really getting frustrated.

Carlisle eyes burns into my soul as he speaks. "Jesus Christ I want you. So fucking much, but I care about you enough to take this slow."

He's rejecting me again, he doesn't want me like I him. I feel so stupid. I slide myself from under him taking him by surprise. I feel the tears sliding down my face. I get up to go up stairs until I feel a firm grip around my wrist.

"Edward please don't…. don't leave me. Come here baby," he says as he pulls me back into his lap holding my face in his hands. His eyes are pleading, "I am not rejecting you. I am protecting both of us. Not to long ago I used people just like I told you earlier. I fucked them and throw them away after I was done. I am not going down that route with you. So you are going to wait until I know that we are both ready to make love. I now that may be a little forceful but we have to do this Edward for both our sakes, right now your hormones are raging. Please understand I am doing this because I love you, I've come to love you so much." He says with tears in his blue eyes, they remind me of a stormy ocean.

"You- you love me?" I stutter out.

"Yes baby, I really do. It may be fast but dammit I think the both of us are in a point in our lives that we know what we want, what we feel. I feel that you love me too. Now tell me you love me."

I am so happy I can burst. I squeal like a darn fat boy in a candy store, throwing my arms around Carlisle, placing kisses on every inch of exposed skin I can find.

"I love you to so much. I promise from now on I'll be understanding and respectful of your wishes." Ugh! I'm crying now.

Carlisle cradles my face and licks my tears away. "I know you do baby." I can see that Carlisle can be a cocky and forceful bastard. I wouldn't have him any other way. Though I still have to voice a concern I have with that even though I know he wouldn't dare do it, but seeing my father being forceful to my mother in a way that left her bruised scares me.

"Suga plum what's wrong?" He asks me, clearly seeing the battle in my eyes.

"Um ... you know Carlisle you can be kind of forceful. I don't have a problem with it because you still make me feel equal and my own person and honestly I kind of like your dominating side …a lot but you wouldn't …. you wouldn't hurt me in that way would you?"

He sucks in a breath so sharp that I am sure it hurt his throat.

"Edward I would never, ever raise a hand against you. I'm not that kind of man. I know I can be forceful sometimes but I never take it too far to where it makes me a monster. Please tell me you believe. I am so sorry if... Edward, please. I couldn't hurt you if I tried you're my soul mate, it's almost physically impossible for me to do such a thing. Please …."

I hate that I showed I had doubt in him.

"Carlisle love, of course I believe you. It's just my father- the man of God he was, raised a hand against my mother. I just know you would never do that to me. I needed to have that said. And if you did you will be sorry. I will not tolerate anything of the sorts." I tell him firmly.

"Thank God, you will never know what that is like." He hugs me so tight I can't breath.

"Car …. air….need it..."

"Sorry suga plum." He laughs out pecking me on my lips.

" Hey baby, I know that you were planning on leaving today since you have work tomorrow but would you please stay? I'll drive you to work tomorrow since I have to go into town and plus it's not that far away. Please?"

I smiled like the damn giddy idiot I was. "Of course I'll love to stay."

We continue to set in peaceful silence until I let out a loud yawn.

"Come on honey love, let's get you in bed."

We go into Carlisle's huge room where I see a bed that is bigger than mine which is saying something. I change into some clothing Carlisle gave me and get into the heaven of a bed. I lay on my back as he climbs on the bed putting my feet in his lap and messages my foot. After he was done with my feet he told me to turn around onto my stomach. He continued to my shoulders, hands and finally my scalp until I fell into a peaceful slumber.

From that night on we have been inseparable, managing our time between both our places. Carlisle finally got to met Jasper and Alice and they hit it off like they have been friends for years. Jasper even told me I have Carlisle majorly whipped and be expecting wedding bells soon. I laughed it off but hope like hell it would come true. I moved out of my apartment and moved in with Carlisle's. My home.

Like every relationship we had our ups and downs, it only served to make us stronger and learn more about each other. I fall in love with him every day passing. He treats me as though he'll never have another moment to see me again. Every single night he messages some part of my body before I go to bed. The small things he does show me he loves me more than anything.

The only thing that has been pissing me off is the lack of sex or even touching. The 4 months we have been together and all me have down is cuddle and making out, we hardly dry humped. When I would push the limits Carlisle would stop me. I don't think he understands how much his rejection hurt and it was starting to get to me.

Carlisle had started to get tested every month for STD'S and all came back negative so I thought that would push us father into intimacy. HECK NO !

I told Alice about it and she even told me I needed to have patience and to not doubt or push Carlisle but damnit I was horny and fed up with being a virgin.

So I went to Jasper about it and he told me the same thing. I had a feeling that Carlisle was afraid to make love because he was extremely dominate. I trusted him; I just wanted him to show me the other side of love.

I confronted Carlisle about this and he said that I was correct in a way and he told me more about his sexual activates. From what he told me I understood more why he wanted to wait but the urges for my boyfriend to make love to me were weighing on me. By this point I was seriously beginning to get blue balls from being aroused so much and not having any release.

~~~E*M~~~

"Whoa slow down. It's not a tongue race suga."

"I'm s-sorry Carlisle. I'm just so excited and I've never done this before and everything just feels so good especially when you touch me and I touch you. You just taste to darn good I can't help it."

He laughs heartily, "I feel the same for you to suga, you have no idea how much I crave you but I don't want us rushing into anything since everything is so new for the both of us, more so you because you haven't had this experiences before."

"Years without a release can do that to you. Listen E we can take our time. We don't have to touch or anything. I will not touch you all over so it can make it easier for you."

Currently I am getting to my breaking point with Carlisle and his speeches about taking it slow. The rejection is weighing heavily on me, making my first experience of a real relationship none the better.

I am so tired of this rejection. I have had enough. Maybe this is just a game to him. He told me himself that he used people. This makes me wonder maybe he never really wanted me. I was such a fool. I should have known.

I remove myself from on top of Carlisle and I can feel the panic in me start to rise, the shaking coming in small waves.

"Maybe later we can start with hand jobs and blowjobs but I don't think I would be giving you any …"

"Get out." I stop Carlisle before he can finish telling me that line. He really just wants to use me. The tears start running down my face and I feel Carlisle moving closer to me, reaching out to touch me.

"Don't touch me; don't ever come near me again!"

I look at him to see tidal waves of confusion and hurt covering his face; he starts to go a deadly pale when I realize he isn't breathing.

"Edward what's wrong, wha ..." He finally lets out a breath.

"Save it, I don't want to hear the excuses. I've heard them all before. If this is what I get for trying to please the person I love with all my heart only for them to use me, I don't ever want to experience this again."

He reaches for me again as I jump off the bed. "Edward, I'm not …"

"Carlisle I love you, I really do and I thought you felt the same; that lightening spark between us, the feeling that is just so right, it seems I am wrong in my assumptions,"

I chuckle in a pitiful manner, "am I that fun to play with? I've only asked to love someone and be loved in return. Am I that undesirable that the thought of just running your hand against me repulses you? "I question him with a quivering voice.

"You want to know something funny? I dreamed of you, at the time I didn't know it was you but now I do. I was told to hold onto this blessing with everything I had."

"I thought you were my gift. In my very soul I felt it, I told myself to follow my heart but what my heart didn't know was that if the person I loved would return it or want me in return. It's funny how you don't see both sides of things. For you, Carlisle, I would have given you anything, done anything just to please you and to make you happy."

Carlisle was kneeling on the bed now looking at me with tears in his eyes. I couldn't bring myself to pounder why he would be crying. His breathes where shallow and he looked completely sick. Yet, he didn't utter one word. He knew I was telling the truth about everything.

"Carlisle please get out and leave me be." He doesn't move just sat there with a shocked expression masking his handsome face. I am assuming he wasn't used to people telling him get out of their sight.

"Carlisle?" He still wasn't moving. Oh, I forgot that this wasn't really my house.

Wiping the last tears I would ever shed for him away, I go into our closet to gather my bag and some clothing, throwing my cell phone, charger, and wallet in there as well. I go into our bath room and pack the necessities. Coming back into our room, Carlisle still hasn't moved, his breathes are coming out as shallow grasps with tears are running down his face. I refuse to look at him more than necessary; if I do my well power to leave will crumble. I don't want to leave my love, my home, but I can't stay in a place where the love of my life doesn't want me, doesn't want to touch me or I him. I am not a toy; I refuse to feel rejected any longer.

Once again the very familiar feeling of loneliness drapes over me.

Finally I hear Carlisle take a deep breath, snapping out of whatever world he was in. I hear and out the corner of my eye see him shifting on the bed.

"Wha- What are you doing?" He asks in an uncertain voice.

"Packing to leave." I bluntly state. I don't want to leave. Be strong Edward. He was going to use you. You have to leave.

"Leaving? Why are you leaving?" He questions positioning himself to get off the bed. I need to hurry up.

"I need to get away from here."

"You're leaving me." This is almost a statement, he seems to ask as though he needs the reassurance that he is correct.

He asked for the truth so I tell him. "Yes." Dammit he is getting closer. I really need to speed this up.

"No you're not." He tells me with up most confidence.

I chuckle at him and maybe that was a bad idea. "Yes I am. You don't tell me what to do."

"I am now and I am telling you that you are not leaving this house and especially me." Carlisle's voice is in a tone I have never heard before, so final.

"Oh really, so I answer to you now? Carlisle, I am leaving and this is final." I say turning to leave the room.

"As a matter of fact you will listen to me and I warn you if your ass takes one more step towards that door you are going to be sorry. Do not fuck with me." I am in trouble because if looks could kill. Carlisle's would murder a whole army. I am not going to give in. I have had enough of being used and rejected.

"Ha, and what are you going to do? Hit me, spank me? Do just like my father did to my mother?" I know deep down he would never do those things

"Take that fucking step and your ass will find the fuck out." He all but growls at me, his whole stance tells me not to challenge him.

"Whatever you don't own me." I say while stomping my foot like a child.

"That ass that is in those jeans belongs to me and no one else. The only way your ass is leaving this house is me giving you permission or me carrying you out. I will state one more fucking time you are not going any fucking where. Start your ass out that door if you dare to and I will fucking handle you and I promise you I will fucking handle you real good. Think smart." He says firmly.

What the hell? He is completely serious but by God I am sticking to my guns.

Rolling my eyes I scoff at him, turning my back to him as I walk towards the door.

Suddenly he is at the door slamming it real hard, locking it, he turns back toward me with the look in his eyes I can tell I have messed up terribly bad and I mean something terrible. A part of me isn't scared at all. I still feel that complete and utter trust I have for him.

I gaze into his fire blues; he looks menacingly deadly as he calmly speaks.

"You really don't think do you or you would know who you are bullshitting with. I told you, you aren't leaving to go any damn where. You think you can ignore me baby boy?" He says, moving closer to me as I step back with fear going through my body and a bit of lust.

"You think you can fucking leave me so easily? You must not know me too well love because no one especially you are going to leave me."

"You don't own me Carlisle, I am leaving. I am not a damn toy you can play with. So. We. Are. Done. That. Is. Final." I slowly stress, walking past him.

Carlisle meets me half way and yanks me by my shirt flushing my body against his and I can feel his erection pressing against my thigh which does nothing for my fear and lust. I am not sure which one is winning.

"Don't you ever try to pull that shit on me again. You better run far and hide well if you're ever going to leave me because I will find your ass and when I do it isn't going be a sweet reunion. I will fuck you every which way to make you fucking forget ever again about leaving me." Those eyes are impassioned, ablazed with possession, fervent with desire, alight with determination. I loved every moment of it.

His lion grip tightens on my shirt as he walks us back against the wall with much force. I am hard as marble and groan in pleasure and pain by the force. I stare into Carlisle's eyes and I can see that he is in complete control and would never hurt me, I also see the warning in there telling me I better do what the fuck he says. I love playing with fire though I am careful enough not to get burned.

"Do not."

He thrust our thin sweat pants covered hard ons' together, "fuck," thrust, "with", harder thrust, "me." It's the best feeling ever.

"Oh god, Carlisle that feels so good." He is panting hard, grunting loudly and the sound is making my erection even harder.

"Fuck yea..." He says against my mouth, kissing me with such intense passion.

"Please baby more," I say as he continues to buck against me harder and I mean hard but it feels so good.

"You like when I handle you rough don't you baby." He says as he pulls my hair softly though firmly yanking my neck to the side so he can suck on my sensitive stop. I scream in answer.

"Fucking tell me. You better beg or I'll stop." The fiction feels so good rubbing our cocks together.

"Yeah baby, oh yes, just like that….. Carlisle … so good… harder… please more." My pre-cum is flowing like a fountain, making every sensation feel like teasing silk.

Carlisle continues grinding against me in the most delicious way, making it harder for me to breathe, when suddenly he pulls away red as a tomato and panting hard.

"Take your damn cloths off and I'm not going to repeat myself."

He doesn't have to tell me twice. I remove my clothing, freeing my painful erection that is begging for a release. Poor thing is dying for attention because he is sticking straight out pointing at Carlisle who I see licks his lips. I realize he is naked also rubbing his long, extra thick cock, pink head looking sinfully delicious with clear arousal flowing like a stream. This is the first time I have seen his cock and damn it is a sight to behold. I crave to have him inside me.

Carlisle comes up to me, pulling me by my arms to him brushing our lengths together, we both hiss at the sensation, he then moves both of his hands down my thighs and between my legs lifting me up wrapping my legs around his waist.

"You feel so goddamn good. I'm going to make damn sure you pay for trying to leave me." Hell, I don't even care right now what I'll be 'paying'. The sensation of our mingling drowns me in ecstasy.

Once again he slams me against the wall, grabs both our cock so they can slid against each other mixing our pre-flow. He starts to move against me in a rapid motion; dipping and circling his hips. I mimic his rhythmic dance of hypnotic thrust.

"Oh sweet lor …." Moans, yells, screams, grunts of passion escape my mouth.

"That's right baby, you like that dick don't you." Carlisle says slamming into me, making my ass hit the wall. I am defiantly going to have some bruising but good god I don't care. I love hearing our slapping skin.

"Mmmm, oh yes, I love… baby please don't stop." I moan out thrusting my hips against his meeting his rough thrusts, sweat dripping from our bodies. I can feel the veins of his cock and the slight curve at the top. His smell is penetrating my senses making everything around me pleasantly hazy. It's intoxicating. I drawn in the strong musky manly scent our bodies are creating.

Panting he tells me. "Oh love, I'm …. Oh fuck… shit… damn baby…. planning on it."

Carlisle releases his hold around my thighs and brings his hands around my neck. I am a little taken back by the rougher jester but I think this is my love and he won't hurt me. The pressure he is applying oddly feels good, making me feel hornier and kinkier.

Carlisle leans in and whispers in my ear. "I'm not going hurt you love. But I'm sure not motherfucking stopping, your ass is going to be taught a lesson; you are going to learn this lesson and do what the fuck I say. Don't even try to fight me because I'll win and you will be punished more."

I arch my back against the wall showing I am completely at his mercy and I have no plan at all disobeying him. He applies more pressure to my neck and I feel him rubbing his thumb against my Adam's apple in a reassuring manner that he will not hurt me; my grip becomes tighter around his arms as we become lost in total bliss.

I feel a warm tightening in my lower stomach, as if sensing this, Carlisle releases his hold on my neck and brings them around my waist backing us away from the wall, then turns and gently tosses me on the bed. My body and cock bounces with the movement.

I whimper at the lost of his body against mine. Carlisle stands at the foot of the bed pumping his delicious white chocolate heaven looking at me with such hooded hunger in his eyes. He takes his other free hand and trails it down his six pack that is covered in our pre-cum, he covers his fingers in the essence and brings it to his mouth and licks his finger.

"Oh. My. Fuck." I state wide eyed. I am so turned on I have to touch myself and proceed to do so.

"Don't you fucking think about it, that cock is mine'." Carlisle drawls out. Did I mention how much I love his dirty mouth?

My body needs him. I know his teasing is part if my punishment.

"Please Car, I need you. Please I want your sweet cock against mine. Let me feel you baby. I'm yours; I promise I'll never try to leave you again. Show me who I belong to." That was all it took for him to grab me by my ankles, pulling me towards the end of the bed as he lies on top of me between my wide spread legs. Our bodies coved in sweat and cum making the sensation for our cocks better.

He pushes us towards the middle of the bed looking me in my eyes. He wraps my legs around his waist and pulls my arms above my head holding them in place.

"Please Car..." I say bucking my hips against his so he can start thrust our lengths together.

He lifts up off me a little, swings back to arch his back before swinging forward rubbing our lengths together. The movement is harsh and unimaginable.

"Holy shit." Carlisle breathes into my mouth.

"Mmmm harder…." I mumble into his mouth. He throws his head back, face expressing great pleasure, his damp hair rocking around his face with his movements against my pulsing cock. I observe his tensing muscles sheered with sweat and I lift my head up to lick the sweat that is running down the dip in his shoulders. He moans at the erotic gesture; continuing his tango of movements against our lengths, creating a silky fire of friction.

"You feel so, oh yeah right there baby …. good." He is driving me wild.

"You like your mans' dick baby?" He grunts, grinding into me harder.

"Hell yeah, I fucking love your dick baby." I whimper in my undisclosed desire.

"You feel him baby, you feel my hard cock that's just for you?"

"God yes I feel it, he so fucking big …. hard …feel so good." The sensation is bringing me to an explosion of flames.

"That's right baby feel my fucking cock. This is the only cock you will ever feel." Carlisle grunts, circling his sinful hips.

"Tell me you love it baby; tell me you love this dick and only this dick." He says looking me in my eyes. I stare back just as intently. I can feel the tears rimming my eyes I feel just so damn good.

"I...I...I... love it baby, oh fuck yea I love it. So close." I shout in strangled sobs as he produces shorter, more intense thrust. I can tell he is just as close as I am.

"Don't you ever pull that shit on me again. I fucking love you, I'd fucking die and kill for your ass …. Oh fuck you feel so good. Edward, I would do anything for you. You're my love. "I can see the tears welling up in his eyes.

"Please baby don't ever leave me, Edward I need you. I'll never hurt you like he did. I want you…. oh fuck baby… oh fuck… I want only you." Our movements are fluently slick. Sticky skin slapping together, our moans, pants fulfills our orchestra of unchained musical caresses; intimacy at its fullest.

"Mmm baby I need you to… only you….. I'm about to come." The room feels with the noise of our primal needy cries of declarations.

Then Carlisle suddenly stops, flips me over, spreads my ass cheeks and slides his cock up and down my ass. I can feel the wet trail he leaves behind as he pulls me by my hair so I can turn my head to kiss him as he bit my lower lip. My dick gains wonderful fiction from the sheets, I push my ass back against his animalistic claiming.

"I can't wait to bury my cock into this tight hole I'm sliding against. I should take you right here and right now, raw, for pulling that stunt you did." He whispers huskily in my ear.

The thought should scare me but I am beyond having fear right now.

"When we are done here I am going to punish you in the shower. I'm going to shove my cock down your throat and if you gag I am going to spank this tight ass of yours with my bare hand."

"Fuck yeah baby, I can't wait to be punished." I am in a sinful heaven.

"I need to cum so bad. Please touch me, I need it."

With a swift slap to my ass that stung very nicely with the sweat that covered my skin, Carlisle growls out, "Don't you dare fucking cum."

I moan.

"You like that rough shit, don't you baby boy."

"Yes love, fuck yes I like it so much."

"You want to fuck my mouth suga plum? You want to fuck it fast and rough?" Carlisle asks with desire. I want his mouth on me terribly bad.

"Please baby, I want you mouth on me. Please Car." I pant out.

Carlisle gets off of me and yanks my hips back deliciously hard. His hands go into my hair holding it in a vice grip. Then I feel another sharp slap to my ass as the sound echoes throughout the room causing me to yelp. My leaking cock that is straining against my stomach gets impossibly harder.

"Tell me who you belong to first." I whimper to try to find coherent words.

I guess I didn't answer fast enough because Carlisle yanks my hair harder and slaps my ass again, much harder this time. "Tell me!" he shouts, making me shout in pleasure and pain.

"You, you fucking sexy cock sucking big dick bastard, only fucking you. You fucking hit my ass that hard one more time and I'm going to fuck your throat until you choke. Now, get on your fucking back so I can fuck that mouth of yours." I challenge him. I never knew I could utter such words but I want to see how far I can go with him.

I look over my shoulder at him and see Carlisle with a smirk on his face, stroking his length. In one swift motion, he yields his hand back and slaps my ass even harder and I swear I almost squirted my release on the pillows and sheets.

So he wants to fuck with me.

I push myself off my hands and knees and tackle Carlisle to his back, with me setting on his chest.

"Angle baby, your golden ass is going to pay for that later." Carlisle eyes me mischievously.

"Shut the fuck up and open that dirty mouth of yours. My cock wants its man right now so feed your baby, big boy." I seductively speak as I run my cock across him mouth.

"Damn, I love you but your in so much fucking trouble." He says while taking my erect length in his hand licking my honey. He moans at the taste.

"Shit you taste like heaven."

"I'm about to shove it in your mouth if you don't stop talking. My cum will taste even better going down your throat, now fucking bring me to ecstasy so you can meet me in heaven."

"I plan on meeting you on cloud nine baby. Now, feed me that big cock of yours and give it to me rough, don't hold back." Though he told me to fuck his mouth rough I would never hurt him.

He grabs my hips, instantly deep throating me all the way. I move at a steady past in his sinfully warm mouth but Carlisle speeds up my movements. I can feel his saliva coating my cock and the ridges on top of his mouth.

"Car, I love your mouth. I waited for this for so long." He hums around my cock and I lose all sanity. I grab him behind his neck to support it as I fuck his mouth like I told him I would. To fast for my taste I feel the tightening in my stomach again.

"I'm about … oh damn."

He lets go of my dick with a pop "that's right come for me." I feel my orgasm coming and it's coming hard and fast. Carlisle works my cock with his tongue, teasing my slit and sensitive head, with a nice and subtle tease of his teeth. And then he sucked hard.

"Oh god, oh god..." I scream as I cum hard in thick steams in his mouth, it's so much he has to let me go to breath, cum dripping all over his face. He strokes me gently elongating my organism. I grab onto the headboard to support myself because the aftershocks are so intense that it's going through my body in rumbling waves. My eyes roll in the back of my head as the tingling feeling flows throughout my body.

I moan and sob in pleasure and pain as they continue. It slightly hurts because of how sensitive I am but it feels good at the same time because of the pain. I sob harder as the heavy emotions steadily crash upon me.

"I feel so good," I say, still crying. The spasms continue. "it hurts so good Car." I sob even louder. Carlisle just holds me, shushing me to calm down. His embrace is comfortable. I don't know how to describe the feelings other than it's as if you have no control of your body, and everything inside you is tightening and releasing and just so intense and sensitive that you can't help anything but cry out your moans.

When I am completely spent and relaxed Carlisle releases his hold on me and lifts us both up laying me tenderly on my back as he straddles my waist I reach out to pumps his cock , he cums hard and long all over my chest and face screaming my name. The way the light is shinning on him as he cums makes him all the more beautiful. After milking his cock he collapses on top of me.

My head is so hazy I didn't even realize Carlisle rubbing our bodies together, further mixing our thick cum, he starts slowly kissing me down my body, cum sticking to his lips. I lift up my head to get a better look as he keeps his eyes on me, descending further down my body.

He dips his nose in my belly button and he sniffs, to my happy trail and sniff, to my hips and sniffs, to the thicker hair around my cock and inhales longer and harder. He pokes his tongue out and cleans my dick and breaths in my scent. He pulls back setting on his heels and puts his hands on top of my knees spreading my legs apart; far and wide. He grabs a pillow and puts it under my ass. Laying flat on his stomach he opens up my ass cheeks and licks from my hole, all the way up to my balls sucking gently on them, it's as if he is cleaning me, he repeats the action burying his face in my ass inhaling my scent.

I am completely taken back by what he is doing and honestly I am not sure how to feel about his actions.

Trailing licks over my dick, stomach and chest he reaches my face and holds it in his strong hands looking at me with pure euphoric love, burning intensity, exhilaration and contentment. And I finally understand what he was doing.

As he says, "I could never ever be repulsed by you. I want all of you and everything you have to offer. You belong to me as I belong to you." In that moment I knew he was truly it for me and I for him.

"I would apologize for being so rough with you our first time doing this but I'll be lying to you. Edward that is why I didn't want to rush into sex so fast because I have the tendency to get a little too rough but my love for you put me into a safe place, its impossible for me to hurt you because you are my soul mate."

Every time he calls me his soul mate my heart swells. I can feel the love he has for me.

"But if you ever," he says holding my jaw in his strong hands, placing a firm grip on it, "try to leave me again, I promise you I will make it to were you can't walk for a week. Do not fucking tempt me on that shit again and I am fucking serious." I know he is. I need him as much as he needs me.

"I promise I won't, but I think its time to take our relationship to the next level. Carlisle I want to give myself to you, you will only ever be the person to posses this. And when you reject me that hurt, I know you love you but I also desire for you to show me the other love. Please try to understand that. You have proven you can love me even taking this from me. You also have to understand that I am you partner and in being that you should discuss these things with me."

"I will not tolerate, nor do I appreciate you making decisions for me when you have not proceeded in consulting me first. That makes us unequal in this relationship and I don't like that feeling." I tell him and I can see the regret in his eyes.

"I will baby and I am so, so sorry for making you feel like that. We have to communicate this stuff better. We have a lot to talk about but if it's ok with you not right now. Listen, I am not going to make love to you tonight being we have things to discuss. I have something planned for us tomorrow. Right now though you're going to receive that punishment, and I promise you baby you are going to be punished. Get your ass in the shower." He growls out. I have a feeling I am about to be punished well.

I move to make my run for the shower. Carlisle chuckles at my giddiness before he stops me.

"Edward, love," He calls after me.

"Yeah Car?" I turn to look at him as he stands up from the bed. Six pack glistening, muscles rippling in his naked glory.

"Come here please." I make my way over to him and he grabs me in a bone crutching hug.

"I love you so fucking much Edward. Please don't ever leave me." I can feel his tears on my shoulder.

I hug him back just a fiercely.

"I love you to C, so very much and I'll never leave you or try to leave you again. Doing that almost killed me." Releasing each other Carlisle cradles my face pulling me into a kiss.

This kiss is all consuming like our love, slow gentle, and firm. This kiss connects our unbreakable bond; the ultimate high until I felt another sharp slap to my ass.

"I want you on your fucking knees, head bowed when I get in there."