Don't own it. Rose and Dimitri belong to Richelle Mead. Italics are flashbacks; first one's at the end of Vampire Academy and second one's in Frostbite. This is a story i found saved on my computer that i wrote a while ago, and i'm just now deciding to post and finish it. It's going to be three chapters.

"Dimka." A high, feminine voice called from behind me. I clenched my teeth together in an effort not to let my frustration out. "Over here, Dimka." Judging by the sound of her voice, she was getting closer.

Dimitri looked over my shoulder and his face broke into a smile. I could easily learn to hate that woman. "Tasha." He greeted her happily. She took a seat in the crowded room, and Dimitri quickly made a beeline to sit next to her. I clenched my teeth together harder.

Looking around for some way to get out of the awkwardness sitting next to them was going to cause, I saw Adrian Ivashkov. I wasn't really in the mood to deal with Adrian, but my choice was to sit next to him or sit with the two lovebirds. I wanted to throw up just thinking of Dimitri and Tasha together, but for now I brushed it off.

I sat down in the seat beside Adrian who immediately caught onto my bad mood. "What's wrong, little Dhampir?" He asked. "Your aura is blacker than normal. And that is saying something." I didn't answer. I just glared at Dimitri's back. I knew my expression was seething, and I was thankful the only one to witness my jealousy at the moment was Adrian. "Oh," his voice ripe with understanding. "I get it now."

"No you don't." I turned my glare on Adrian. "No one does."

Adrian looked like he wanted to disagree, but a Moroi man stood up in front of the audience and began to speak. I didn't bother listening.

Dimitri claimed to care about me.

"Was he right?"

"Who?"

"Victor... he said it couldn't have worked. The necklace." I started to drift off, lost in the blackness of my mind, but Dimitri prompted me back to consciousness.

"What do you mean?"

"The spell. Victor said you had to want me… to care about me… for it to work." When he didn't say anything, I tried to grip is shirt, but my fingers were too weak. "Did you? Did you want me?"

His words came out thickly. "Yes, Roza. I did want you. I still do. I wish… we could be together."

And then later when I was baiting him in the practice room;

"You don't care about me. You're just stuck in your stupid mentor role."

He stared at me, uncharacteristically surprised. "I don't care about you?"

"No." I was being petty- very, very petty. And I knew the truth- that he did care and was more than just a mentor. I couldn't help myself, though. It just kept coming and coming. I jabbed his chest with my finger. "I'm another student to you. You just go on and with your stupid life lessons so that-"

The hand I'd hoped would touch my hair suddenly reached out and grabbed my pointing hand. He pinned it to the wall, and I was surprised to see a flare of some emotion in his eyes. It wasn't exactly anger… but it was frustration of another kind.

"Don't tell me what I'm feeling," he growled.

Over and over, he told me that he cared about me. And over and over, he went and broke my heart. It may not seem like much, his anger over my jabs. But every time he pushed me away it hurt. It hurt like crazy. And now, to top off all of the other lies or half-truths or whatever they were, he was going to go with her. He was going to choose Tasha Ozera, Moroi extraordinaire, over me. I felt my eyes prick with tears that I quickly pushed away.

"Rose." A voice interrupted the pity-party I was having in my head. I looked up to see Adrian looking at me concernedly. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine." I snapped. "I'm freaking fantastic."

I looked around and saw that the meeting was over. And I hadn't heard one word of it. I would have to take a trip in Lissa's head later to find out what it had been all about. But for now, I wanted to continue to sulk. I had good reason after all.

"You don't look okay." Adrian told me. At my glare, he added, "You look beautiful as always, but Rose that glare won't get me to say anything else. You still don't look okay."

"Really?" I asked sarcastically. "Whatever would give you that idea?" I didn't wait for an answer. Instead, I pushed my way past him and left the room.

Once I left the crowded room, I wandered aimlessly down random hallways. I didn't pay much attention to where I was going until I tripped over my own feet. I was glad no one else was around. I didn't need anyone to see me, a future guardian, stumble over my own feet. I looked around to see where my feet had carried me.

I felt my heart sink. I leaned heavily against the wall and sank down to the floor. Of course, my feet would take me in his direction. My feet had led me right to Dimitri's doorway. Sitting against the wall directly across from his room, I felt the tears come again. And this time I didn't stop them.

Sometimes you just need to cry. To let your feelings out. Usually, I was great at letting my feelings out. They came out in one long heated rant at just about anyone who ticked me off. It was different with Dimitri. Everything was different with Dimitri. Every time I was around him now, I felt like a child. An immature, selfish child. I knew that what Tasha offered Dimitri was a once in a lifetime thing, it was a much better offer than stolen kisses in a corner with a girl seven years younger than him. I just couldn't manage to let go. So I cried.

Finally, no more tears would come. I curled my legs in to my chest and wrapped my arms around them.

I must have fallen asleep because the next thing I knew, I heard a voice call my name. Then I was being lifted up off the ground and carried. Someone was murmuring gently in my ear. All the while, I was still half asleep. "Rose." The person carrying my murmured in my ear, "Come on, Rose."I didn't bother to answer. I only leaned my head against his chest.

Then next thing I knew, I heard a door slam. The sound of someone's footsteps grew closer and closer until they were right in front of me. "Good." A voice muttered quietly. "You didn't wake her."

"What is she doing here?" Another voice demanded nowhere near as quietly.

"Christian Ozera found her outside. Asleep. I couldn't carry her all the way to her dorm without being asked some very uncomfortable questions." The first voice replied. "And keep your voice down or you'll wake her up."

"Why does she look like she's been crying?" The second voice asked. I was awake enough to realize that from the higher pitch of this voice, it belonged to a woman. The first voice was lower and obviously male.

"I told you; he brought her here asleep. I have no idea why she's been crying." There was a slight hitch in the man's voice as he said this.

I turned over, trying to get the voices to go away. I just wanted to sleep, but they wouldn't let me. "Well next time, alert me. She shouldn't be in here anyway. It's against the rules." The woman's voice continued, fading slowly as if she left the room. I didn't hear the man's voice either, so my sleepy brain assumed that he left too.

"Roza, you can wake up now." So the man didn't leave. Wait a second, the only person who called me that was…

"Dimitri." I said sleepily. I tried to open my eyes, but they didn't want to open. They seemed stuck together. I rubbed at them and managed to get them open. I was greeted with the sight of my gorgeous, intimidating mentor sitting on the bed beside me.

"Roza." He repeated softly. "What happened?"

"Huh?" I asked. My brilliance amazes even me sometimes. I had no idea what he was talking about. All I could remember was being carried and waking up here. In a room that obviously was not mine on a really comfy bed.

Dimitri reached up to push some of my hair out my face and tuck it behind my ear. "You've been crying." He said in that same soft concerned tone.

I reached up to touch my cheeks and then looked down at my hands confirming the fact that my makeup had run. "I must look like crap." I wailed. Normally, this wouldn't bother me, but this was Dimitri we were talking about. I climbed off of the bed and almost ran into the bathroom. Sure enough, I had raccoon eyes and my makeup was smeared with tear tracks.

I ran the water in the sink and began to scrub the gunk off. No wonder my eyes seemed like they were glued shut. I had been crying, I realized. And it all came rushing back. Dimitri was probably leaving. With Tasha. He didn't love me. I pushed these thoughts away and worked on fixing my face. When I was finally done removing the makeup, I looked in the mirror. I still looked bad. My eyes were puffy and red from where I had scrubbed the makeup off. You could still tell that I had been crying.

"Rose, are you okay?" Dimitri's voice came from behind me and I jumped. I didn't know he had followed me into the bathroom.

"Yeah. I'm fine." I said defensively. Dimitri was in his caring teacher mode. He wasn't going to let this go until we had an adult discussion and a profound Zen lesson.

"No. You're not." He said shortly. His tone brooked no discussion. He took my arm and led me back to the bed I had woken up in. We sat side by side. "If you tell me what's wrong, maybe I can help." He suggested his voice full of compassion. I didn't want his compassion. I didn't need it.

"You don't want to know what's wrong." I told him. I let out a humorless laugh. "Besides, you already know."

"What is it, Roza?" He pushed. "You can tell me anything."

"Not without getting another Zen life lesson and a speech on control." I said bitterly. "You're always counseling me to hold back. Well, this time, I'm going to listen." I resolutely crossed my arms and stared him down.

I could tell with one glance that Dimitri was beginning to become frustrated. I told myself not to care. If he didn't care about me, I was determined not to care about him. His patient expression now held a hint of frustration. Typical Rose, he was probably thinking, so immature and juvenile. This strengthened my resolve not to embarrass myself by telling Dimitri that I was crying over him.

"Rose, this isn't a game. I'm serious; I want to know what's wrong. And don't pretend that everything's fine. You exhausted yourself crying, and then you fell asleep. Christian had to carry you in here. You're lucky he found you and not one of the Royals or one of the other guardians."

"Remind me to thank Sparky later." I replied glibly. Deciding to try and change the subject, I looked around his room. "How come you don't have a roommate?" I asked curiously. "I have to share with Lissa."

"Would you rather not share with her?" He asked, playing along.

"Of course not. I was just curious." I sighed. So much for small talk. I lay back on the bed and stared at the ceiling.

"You need to get back to your room." Dimitri said. I wondered why he wasn't pushing to find out what was bothering me anymore, but hey, that was fine with me. "You're not allowed here anyway. You're mom came in here earlier and saw you."

I vaguely recalled hearing her voice while I was half asleep. "Mmm." I tried to make an interested noise, but I think it was more distracted. "How'd you enjoy that?"

"Rose, she's not a bad person." He told me. Dimitri was all for reconciliation. More of the Zen crap he was always talking about.

"Really, so you enjoyed your little visit?" His expression confirmed my suspicions. "That's what I thought."

"Come on, Rose." He stood up and held out his hand. I grasped it with my own and he pulled me to my feet. "I'll walk you back to your room."

Dimitri held onto my hand for a little longer than necessary and looked deeply into my eyes. Then as if the moment had never happened, he dropped my hand and moved towards the door. I followed him and we walked in companionable silence back to mine and Lissa's room. Well, it was companionable until Dimitri decided to ruin it.

"Don't think I didn't notice that you still haven't told me what made you cry." Dimitri lectured. "I'm going to find out."

"No," I said matter-of-factly. "I don't think you are."

"You know, Rose." Dimitri said exasperatedly. "I have always wondered why people bang their heads against brick walls. Then I met you."

I couldn't stop the grin from spreading across my face. "Don't complain." I instructed him. "Your life would be so much more boring without me in it to brighten it up."

His expression sobered and I felt the smile leave my face. Pretty soon, if he took Tasha's offer, he wouldn't have me around at all. Before I could say anything else, I heard it again. That same high-pitched annoying voice calling, "Dimka! I didn't expect to see you here." He made some lame excuse and turned to walk away. To go to her.

And for at least the third time that day, my heart broke into pieces.

Wow, this is a lot more angsty that I expected it to be when I started writing it.