Hi? I doubt anyone's out there who is still reading this and for that I strongly apologize. Like deeply. My excuse is just that I got too depressed to do anything, school and this. I think I kind of gave up on life for a while but I'm doing better and hopefully will be able to get quick updates. I only have 3hours of school because of said depression and lots of freetime after school now that I have legit only family. My doctor appointments are often but I should be able to get out a story at least two to four times a week. I'll try my best. But I'm strongly deeply sorry.

Warnings:

Pairing:Finn/Puck

Disclaimer: I've been told I should own Glee but I don't.

"Wait, wait."

Finn's crying, Puck's crying. In two separate houses, each boy is torn apart. Kurt's staring at Puck in shock and slight sympathy as the boy sobs, heart-wrenching sobs at that. Still Kurt's more angry at Puck than sympathetic. Meanwhile Puck could only think of how much he deserved to die, to crawl and be isolated from the world and fucking die. He'd go far enough to say he deserves to lose his penis for the rest of his life and that's going a step too far at that. He should've just loved Finn and that's the part of him that's feeling the worst. The part that loves Finn is telling Puck he destroyed the only person who could ever love him back, the only person he thinks he'd ever want to love him back.

Finn had stayed home sobbing into his pillow after having woke up from another nightmare of being pinned to his mattress as Puck...but it wasn't Puck. His mind decided that yes what Puck did was wrong and he should damn well hate Puck but still told him a million and a half reasons as to why what Puck did wasn't wrong. What's worse is he's sure that if Puck said that he loved Finn, Finn would just die and nod. It was a horrible feeling and Finn thought it'd be better if he just stopped with Puck altogether. If he cut the sex addict out of his life and started over. It seemed like it was the best thing to do.

"I didn't...I couldn't...why...wh-...Finn...no..." Puck couldn't form a full sentence as he tried to question the words Kurt had revealed to him in a heartbreaking manner. The hate and disgust evident in Kurt's eyes and voice as he spoke to Puck. Puck damn well deserved it too, he deserved everything now and now he understood. Understood why he wouldn't get that movie Happily-Ever-After people pray for. That white picket fence with a dog and two kids running around. He didn't even want it now, he didn't know what he wanted but he did. He wanted to fix Finn. He wanted Finn to be the boy he used to know and just wished that Finn wasn't too far gone to give himself back.

"Puck, stop, please."

The ignoring came all to fast as Finn threw his phone at the wall then stood and crushed it. Afraid that eventually Puck would call him and beg for him to come over. And Finn would say yes, because Finn always say's yes, he never says no. Somehow, when he does say no it's always taken as a yes anyway, isn't it? As long as he's known Puck he never thought Puck would do this never believed Puck could. Now, he's questioning everything his friend ever did. Did he do this to those whores he so easily compared Finn to?

It made sense though, that Finn said he wasn't just going to be a booty call and fuck Puck wouldn't have made him into one if he had known. He should've known. He should of listened. He should've cared. He does, so bad right now. He cares more than he ever has and that kills him. It kills him as much as loving Finn did and that killed him a lot, until now. Now all he wants to do is wrap his arms around Finn and let Finn cry and try to fix the boy back up and tell Finn to never, ever forgive him. He doesn't even deserve to be talked to by Finn let alone forgiven and he will never forgive himself, he can't. He wants to know how it happened though, he wants Finn to tell him what exactly he did. But somehow he feels he doesn't even deserve that.

"Why?" Finn had feelings for his friend he really did and he thinks that's exactly what might've destroyed him. If he didn't have feeling for Puck this would've never happened. This would've never happened if he stayed friends with Puck in highschool. This would've never happened if he made friends with Puck in the first place. This would've never happened if he didn't live here. This would've never happened if he wasn't born. Then Finn met his eyes in the mirror as blame started filling him.

"This would've never happened if you didn't kiss him." Finn said to his reflection feeling tears gather in his eyes. "This is all your fault."

It was a normal hang out the boys laughing but Finn had started feeling a little in love with his friend for the past two weeks and wanted to tell Puck but wouldn't. Only because well 1. Puck IS straight and 2. he wasn't really ready for sex with a guy just yet and Puck would want sex.

"Alright, Finn, that's it what's wrong?"Finn sighed and looked at the floor.

"I...don't know how to explain it..." He bit his lip and looked back at Puck who rolled his eyes but looked to Finn, waiting. When Finn didn't elaborate he broke the slight silence.

"Explain it. I know you can give me an explanation as to what is running through that head of yours." Finn met his eyes and kissed Puck quickly before realizing what he was doing and pulling away. Finn stood up wide eyes and mouth agape as Puck's face went from shock to confusion to outraged. Finn thought about dipping.

"I'm sorry." He whispered and Puck spoke or rather yelled.

"You just...you can't just...what the HELL kind of explanation is THAT!?" Puck yelled at Finn who stood with huge eyes and a slightly open mouth.

And to think Puck's a horrible scumbag because of one quick kiss and Puck returning it. The only one to blame was Puck in Puck's eyes and Kurt's eyes, the only one to blame in Finn's eyes was Finn himself. And they both hated it, hated what had happened, both sick to their stomach as they both sobbed in separate houses at the same time against the wall of their bedroom.

"You're a diablo, You're so damn evil."

There ya go, isn't that a great comeback though? That's a great comeback. I listened tot eh song "Diablo" By Simon Curtis like a million and seven times while I wrote this, hence the last line. I really hope you guys liked it, I'll try and update more and oh yeah again...sorry.