A/N: We're here! Yay! Here is the final part to the series. I'm in shock that I actually finished a series, but it's truly all thanks to you guys. Your support and love and advice throughout all of this has made me fall in love with writing again and you honestly have reminded me of a lot of things I'd forgotten. You are all so fantastic and I can only hope you'll enjoy the work I do in the future (trust me, you won't be waiting long!)

It's written from both Kurt and Blaine's point of view but mostly from Kurt's, as the oneshot was originally from Kurt's point of view.

As I was writing this final part I found that a mix starting taking shape and haunting me, so as a little present to you guys, I've created an accompanying mix for the story which you can download at the link below.

thiscalamity-x(dot)livejournal(dot)com(slash)4323(dot)html

Thank you all so much for everything. Enjoy the last part and if you want to know anything more about the ending or have any questions or comments, please review.

I love you all.

His footsteps quickened, the floor tapping out a rhythm dancing along with the words screaming in his head.

in love with you… cut his heart out… feelings, real feelings…

It was all so, so much, and as he rushed down the hallway, losing breath as he picked up speed, it seemed like the longest walk of his life. The only thing Kurt Hummel was sure of in this moment was that if he stopped moving, if he took even a second to question this or to plan it or to work out what he was going to say when he saw him, he was going to be stuck standing still in this hallway for the rest of his life. It took him a little while to notice that he wasn't wearing any shoes – he must've kicked them off somewhere during his conversation with Wes, and he almost laughed out loud at the dramaticness of it all, but he understood it now. He understood the rushed cab rides to airports, the drunken three a.m. confessions, pushing through crowds of people and screaming it from the rooftops kind of love, because if you didn't do those things, if you didn't let go and just go for it, there was the risk of it slipping between your fingers. There was the risk that logic would get in the way and suddenly the moment would be gone.

Kurt had been grasping at straws for so long, desperate to find something that would confirm one hundred percent for sure that Blaine cared just as much about him as he did about Blaine. He had always thought it would be through a kiss, or a huge romantic speech, where Blaine would tell him how much he desperately needed him forever and ever. It had never occurred to him that maybe it was up to him to have the courage to do either of those things. He had always quietly expected the fairytale to play out with him as the one being rescued because for so long he had been the victim, and Blaine had done just that. He would never admit it to anyone but himself – he was independent, and stubborn as hell, but he had wanted that fairytale more than anything. Blaine had swept in and for a while been everything he thought he needed, and it was only now, after seeing all the flaws laid out on the table that Kurt realized they were on an equal footing, and that there was nothing to stop him from sweeping Blaine off his feet. He never would've guessed that the thing that would bring them together the most was what happened to them both when they were apart, but it made sense. You never know what you've got until it's gone, right?

In a way, while Kurt had thought Blaine was the idiotic one, the one who couldn't see what was right in front of him the whole time, there were so many things Kurt had been missing. His expectations were so different that he ignored anything Blaine did that didn't conform to them – he expected the clean-cut romance, the softly spoken confession, the chaste kiss, and the comfortable relationship. He'd never been anything close to love before, only infatuation, and it wasn't till now that he realized that it never, ever works like that.

He knew now, though. Love is messy and angry and painful because it's the only thing in the world that makes every emotion burn a thousand times stronger. Every hurt is a knife, every touch is a song, and that's why it's so wonderful and so terrible all at the same time. The hug they had shared in the bathroom, the way it had coursed fire and ice through his veins and the way he had wanted to cling to Blaine forever but at the same time push him far enough away that he'd never have to look at him again, that was what love was about, about the internal battle between fear and want. God, they'd both been so stupid.

Blaine closed his eyes again, lying on his bed with his headphones in. He'd been listening to a carefully constructed playlist of his most depressing songs in an attempt to get it all out of his system - to start to get over it all. He would get over it. Eventually.

It was all so fucking frustrating, but so typical of him. He had always screwed things up, with his temper or his actions, and it was typical that he would screw up the thing that was the most important to him. He'd thought that by doing everything he'd done, he wouldn't screw any of it up. He wouldn't screw up the friendship, wouldn't screw up Kurt by being with him and then hurting him or doing something dumb and making Kurt hate him, which would in turn screw Blaine up even more. Now here they were anyway, ten times worse than anything Blaine had ever anticipated, heading towards never speaking again. God, he was so fucking stupid.

All he'd ever wanted to do was make things stay the way they were, but that was to protect Kurt, to protect himself, to be pathetic and selfish and scared and to stay as he was, the charming perfectly happy to be alone Blaine that everyone at this school knew. That's who he'd always been. He would shove his emotions down, because in his family, emotion was not only a big no-no but to his father, just one more thing that made him even more explicitly his disappointingly gay son.

Every time Blaine truly got angry, he would drive for hours and contemplate swerving off the road, into the trees, out of spite and anger and exhaustion.Keeping up this façade, being the person everyone expected him to be exhausted him. Then out of nowhere, he'd looked up on the staircase one day and there was a beautiful boy standing looking straight back at him and straight through him.

He'd finally been able to be himself, to be whoever he wanted to be with Kurt, and even when they disagreed on things he knew it was only because Kurt knew more than he really wanted him to – he'd let him in too far, and there was always the danger that one day Kurt would turn around and be disappointed in him too, and now he was.

He heard a quiet tap on the door through John Mayer crooning (when you're dreaming with a broken heart, the giving up is the hardest part) and paused it, waiting to see if they'd knock again. It was probably David, or Wes coming to check on him, and he didn't want their pity anymore because this was his fault, as well meaning as it may be.

But then, he heard Kurt call out, and he was up at his door before he knew he was moving, ripping his headphones out of his ear on the way.

When Kurt finally reached Blaine's door, the moment of doubt he'd been dreading reared it's ugly head. He stared at the wood, fear pulsing through his veins.

What if Wes had been wrong? What if Wes had been exaggerating?

What if once again, he was reading every single signal incorrectly?

It didn't matter, he realized, because if he didn't do this now, if he didn't do this for himself, he was going to go crazy. It wasn't like things could get any worse between them. He had no idea what was going to come out of his mouth when he opened the door or where this conversation would leave them, but he had to try.

He lifted his hand to rap on the door twice, impatient and desperate. There was nothing but silence for a moment, no movement in the hallway, and he turned away from the door in a moment of abject terror. He lent against it momentarily, before scolding himself, turn the fuck around and try again, Kurt, and he turned, his hand tapping once more.

"Blaine? …Blaine? It's me, please, open th-"

The door swung open to Blaine, a Blaine that Kurt had never seen before. His eyes were rimmed with red, and he looked like he'd been crying for quite a while. His tie was loose around his neck and his shirt rumpled, the white sleeves pushed up to his elbows. His hair was ungelled, messy and curly and just a little bit everywhere. His pants were wrinkled like he'd slept in them and his white socks were pushed down and slightly dirty, as he stood gazing up at Kurt.

They stood there, staring at one another for a moment, and Kurt opened his mouth to speak but there was nothing to say. There were no words for what this was, what it had been, what it could be. Instead, he inched forward slightly into the doorway, stepping closer to Blaine who said nothing, just watched Kurt with waiting eyes, searching for what this all meant. Kurt turned momentarily to shut the door, then turned back, his eyes prickling with tears and anticipation and fear and wonderment at the broken down pieces of Blaine standing small in front of him.

He took another step towards him, and Blaine watched him curiously. Something was burning in the air, a tension, and in that moment when their eyes connected suddenly Kurt knew he didn't need to say anything. Blaine knew. Finally, they were nearly nose-to-nose with one another, and there was no way Kurt could move any closer without pushing Blaine in the opposite direction. Kurt watched as Blaine's eyes started to water right in front of him and before he knew what he was doing, before he even had the chance to push himself to do it, he had brought his hand up to the side of Blaine's face, crashing their lips together.

Blaine stumbled backwards from the sudden force, gripping onto Kurt for gravity and Kurt moved with him, their teeth clacking against one another awkwardly as Kurt backed Blaine up against the wall. His tongue traced the bottom of Blaine's lip and Blaine inhaled sharply, deepening the kiss. Blaine's hands were instantly up at Kurt's face, holding him close, and Kurt could feel Blaine crying, shuddering slightly underneath him. It just gave him a rush of want, wanting to pull Blaine closer, kiss him harder, drag him down into everything Kurt was feeling until he understood that it was okay now, they were going to be okay. He could feel his own tears welling up as they moved against one another, and he pulled back to mumble between kisses words of comfort. Kurt moved closer into him, leaning entirely onto Blaine and Blaine moved to wrap his arms around Kurt's waist, clutching tightly, but the desperation was softened. It was still a need, a want, but the fear was disappearing from his grip and Kurt sighed softly into the kiss in relief.

When he finally pulled away from Blaine, one hand still resting on his cheek, he intertwined his free hand in Blaine's and squeezed. As he brushed away a leftover tear on Blaine's cheek with his thumb, Blaine turned his head into Kurt's palm and closed his eyes. Kurt felt an ache spread through his body at the way he had tortured Blaine, tortured himself through all of this, when all he'd needed to be was here, right here, and they could've made this right so long ago if they'd just talked and been honest like they'd always promised each other to be.

"It's okay." Kurt said, and Blaine's eyes fluttered open to gaze at him.

"Blaine, it's okay. It's okay."

It was unbearable, watching Blaine fall apart in front of him when all he wanted to do was put him back together, and he gently pulled him towards the bed, releasing his hand to lie with his back to the headboard and shuffling over to make room for Blaine, gesturing for him to sit. Blaine crawled over on the bed next to him and they sat, looking at one another for a moment. Kurt reached his hand out to intertwine it again with Blaine's, and Blaine opened his mouth to speak, hesitant.

"I don't understand – I – I thought you hated me. I was such an asshole and you were so mad, and I just –"

Kurt tugged Blaine gently and let go of his hand to wrap his arm around his waist, holding him close. Blaine dropped his head to Kurt's shoulder, inhaling deeply. He smelt like peaches and fresh laundry and Kurt, the Kurt he hadn't even been able to look at, the Kurt who had been so angry, had hated him so much, the Kurt he had hurt so badly, who was now sitting here, holding him, comforting him. Blaine always knew Kurt was the better man, but this just proved it. Kurt could feel Blaine breathing gently at his side, and he leant his head to rest it on top of Blaine's hair.

"I didn't hate you, god, I spent the entire time wishing I could, Blaine, but I can't. I needed time to realize some things, and I don't think you'll be offended when I say I think you did too."

Blaine nodded numbly, closing his eyes, content to just listen to Kurt speak and to drown in his voice. He'd never known you could miss a voice so much.

"I was scared, and I was angry, because you were the first chance at happiness that seemed real to me, and you were open and welcoming and I really thought you wanted to be with me, and then everything – everything else happened, and it tore me to shreds because it was like 'Here's someone who's gay, like you, who makes you happy, who's been flirting with you, and after all that, they still don't want you either.' At first I was just so angry at you for doing that to me, for making me feel like I wasn't good enough for you after everything we had been through, but I realized the only person I should be angry at was myself for letting you do that to me."

"God, I'm so sorry Kurt, I just –"

"I'm not finished, Blaine. The thing was though, I was never really angry. It was just easier to be angry than to face how much it all hurt. I wanted you so badly, Blaine, because when I'm with you things feel a little better for me, and I feel stronger, and happier, and I feel okay, sometimes when I'm with you is the only time I feel okay. So for me to see that, to go through that, it broke my heart." Kurt's breath hitched as he started to tear up. "But I needed that. It showed me that I don't need someone who doesn't need me."

Blaine looked up at this, tearing his head from its place on Kurt's shoulder to stare at him, his eyes wet, searching. He moved to pull away slightly from Kurt. After all of this? After coming here, and kissing him, and making him feel all the things he'd been so terrified to feel, after all of that, he was going to leave Blaine? This time though, it would be even worse than before, because he would know so well what he was losing, and this time, he would be losing something he never even dreamed he could actually let himself have. Kurt wouldn't let him move away, however, and he gently pulled Blaine back towards him, tightening his grasp on his waist and moving to rest their foreheads together.

"Then I realized that you do need me, Blaine. You need me to tell you when you're being an idiot, and I need you to tell me when I'm being a bitch. You need me to make you face your crap, and I need you to make me face mine. We need each other, as equals. This isn't an either or, Blaine, this is it. This is it for me. I need you, and I want you, and I don't want to run from that anymore just because it's going to be hard, and scary. We're going to hurt each other, but isn't that inevitable when you –" he swallowed audibly, eyes never leaving Blaine's, "when you love somebody?"

Blaine's eyes widened and Kurt opened his mouth to continue, to tell him he didn't expect him to say anything back because the fact that they were here, that this was happening at all for him, that was enough, but before he could speak Blaine was pressed flush against him once more, moving so quickly that Kurt was nearly knocked sideways into the wall his bed was against. He quickly regained his balance and pressed back into the warmth, their bodies and mouths moving against one another, messy and wonderful. Even though Blaine had been so broken down, his grasp on Kurt's waist was how Kurt remembered it - strong and calming. He inhaled deeply as Blaine's stubble grazed his chin slightly and he found himself hit with a rush of tingly excitement. Kurt was so wrapped up in the moment that he almost didn't notice Blaine start to shudder again underneath him, but when he did his excitement was replaced with dread.

No, no, it's okay, why are you crying, fuck, I shouldn't have said anything -

He grabbed Blaine's shoulders and pushed him back gently from the kiss to search his face, to ask why he was crying and to try to understand what he'd done wrong, but he was in shock at what he saw in place of tears.

Blaine was laughing.

His shoulders were shaking with each wave of laughter that burst out and his face looked ready to split in two, eyes wet with tears but bright to match his smile. Kurt moved to push him away further, this time with a roughness as he felt a surge of anger roll through him. How could he? Kurt just told him he loved him, and he was laughing at him? Kurt had spent his entire life with people laughing at him for the way he was, for being honest about how he felt and acting on it, and now Kurt had been honest with the person he never would've thought would do such a thing, and he was basically wetting himself.

Mid-shove, however, Blaine scrambled towards Kurt as he choked slightly on air, heaving with giggles as he tried to pull him towards him. The ensuing scramble was not pretty, as Blaine tried desperately to scoot closer to Kurt who squirmed like an irritable child in Blaine's grasp.

"Oh god, Kurt, no, don't be like that, I'm not laughing at you, I swear, it's just -"

Blaine dissolved into giggles once more, clapping a hand to his mouth in the process in an attempt to cover his amusement. Kurt turned away from him, fixing his eyes at a spot on the wall as Blaine began to nuzzle against the side of his face. It was hard to keep his focus as Blaine began to press soft little kisses to his cheek and neck, but each kiss was punctuated with a ripple of laughter and he could feel Blaine smiling broadly against his cheek.

He felt his own mouth begin to quirk at the corner regardless of his frustration, because just hearing Blaine laughing the way he was, pure and bubbly made his heart swell slightly. It felt like it had been weeks since he had heard Blaine laugh, and the sound was bright and sweet in his ears. He fought to stop himself from giving in to his desire to turn his head and kiss Blaine again because he still hadn't said anything about what Kurt had said, and in Kurt's opinion that was far too anticlimactic a love confession at this point. But if there was anything this entire situation had taught Kurt, it was that you didn't always know the whole story, and that expectations meant nothing – were nothing – compared to the real thing.

"Kurt, please, look at me?" Blaine finally calmed down slightly, wiping a tear from the corner of his eyes before moving to put a hand to Kurt's chin, tilting his head back towards him. Blaine was still smiling; his eyes gentle and warm as he spoke, and Kurt did his best not to look Blaine in the eye, trying to ignore him as he waited passive-aggressively for an explanation.

"Kurt, I'm going to need you to look me in the eyes for just one second because I've been thinking about saying this for a really, really long time, before I even knew I wanted to say it, and saying it while you're not even looking at me wasn't quite how I wanted it to go down."

Kurt's eyes flicked to Blaine's silently, his lips still pressed together in a thin line. Blaine grinned a little wider when Kurt met his eyes, before leaning forward to press a gentle kiss to Kurt's lips. Kurt inhaled softly, clamoring for air as he tried to force enough oxygen into his brain to remind him that he was still a little pissed off, but all he could feel and taste was Blaine, soft and warm against his mouth. When Blaine pulled away, his cheeks were tinged slightly pink and he had a faraway look in his eyes as he leant his forehead against Kurt's.

"I love you too, okay? I was laughing because – I'm such an idiot. I have no idea what I was thinking – I wasn't thinking – and you were there and you were perfect and I screwed everything up, and you were kind of right to call me a slut, I was sort of being one, and even after all of that, you're here, and I can't believe I was dumb enough in the first place to even think for a second that this wasn't exactly where I was meant to be. It's so funny to me that we went through all of this because you're stubborn and I don't think things through and I think we've been a thousand times more emotional and dramatic about all of this than that girl you've told me about – Rachel?" Blaine shook his head, trying to remember everything he had wanted to say, and he took a deep breath before launching back into his speech.

"It just kind of hit me all at once that this is happening for me, which in itself is ridiculous because I'm ridiculous. I couldn't be happier, Kurt. Really."

Kurt couldn't help but soften as Blaine earnestly babbled, clutching Kurt's hand in his own and entwining their fingers. He was lit up, face still slightly damp from the rollercoaster ride of emotion he had just jumped off. Blaine wiggled his legs closer to Kurt's as he spoke, gently rubbing one of his sock-covered feet against Kurt's affectionately. Blaine just wanted every part of him that could touch Kurt to be touching Kurt, to make up for the fact that he hadn't even been able to look at him in far too long.

Kurt shifted slightly next to him and Blaine lifted his arm up to wrap it around Kurt's shoulders, pressing a warm kiss to the top of his head, before playing gently with part of his hair. Kurt slapped his hand away playfully, but blinked up through his lashes to smile at Blaine.

"You're right, you know. You're definitely kind of ridiculous." One side of Kurt's mouth quirked higher as he spoke and Blaine smirked before kissing him on the nose with an exaggerated smooching noise, causing Kurt to scrunch his face up slightly.

"You love me anyway though."

Kurt rolled his eyes at Blaine, who was staring at him eagerly with a tender smile on his face, and he just knew.

Here was what he'd been looking for.

He had been searching for clues and hoping desperately and wishing all the time and even though the road to here hadn't been particularly pleasant, Kurt had ended up where he needed to be. He was now being held by the one person he trusted more than anything, the one person who he now trusted more than ever. He was being held by the one person he was willing to hurt for, to fight for, to fight with, and to love. Kurt knew now, after everything that had happened. This was what it was about. This boy, this love, everything it was right in this moment and everything it was going to become in the future.

It wasn't going to be easy - they both knew that now - but what they also knew was that it was going to be worth every second.

"You know what?" Kurt mused happily, "I really, really do."