Stargazer

Inspiration: Stargazer by Paloma Faith. If you haven't heard it, go find it. Seriously.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Rose stood ankle deep in the pebbly sand, listening to the sound of the ocean crashing and clawing at the beach. The sea breeze was bitterly cold, and she shuddered till her bones ached. She wrapped her arms round her body in a futile attempt to retain some body heat.

She looked up at the stars.

And she wished.

It had been a long, cruel year since she had been ripped away from his side. Everything she had learned, everything he had taught her was useless in her efforts to get back to him. True, she had taken a position at Torchwood, and she had helped in numerous missions and shared her expertise with her colleagues, but none of this had brought her closer to him. All the hours she had spent cooped up in the Torchwood archive rooms, searching books on quantum physics and multiple dimension theories and every possible report she could find about the Cyberman invasion had been fruitless.

She gazed at the night's sky, the strange blackish-blue blanket peppered with untold numbers of stars. Velvet. She'd always thought the sky at night looked like velvet.

She knew most of those stars now. Between her frantic search through the libraries and her travels with him, she had become quite an expert, and could pinpoint any constellation of her choice without really trying. All of that was little comfort now, when she stood in Bad Wolf Bay, a whole year later, more detached than ever.

Rose...

She turned, her eyes straining through the darkness to find him. She heard him call her name. She would have given her soul if only to catch a glimpse of him, if he could somehow be there for her. But alas, it was only the wind.

A sob broke from her chest and choked her. Tears spilled down her cheeks, like ice shards against her skin. Her heart hurt – it longed to see him again, just once. At one time she had thought it would be impossible to live apart from him – that her heart would break if they were separated. But now she knew the truth. She could live without him; she was a whole, complete person, with skills and talents and love and courage and she could be this person without him by her side. But, she had come to find, without him, it wasn't worth it.

She had come to this beach once a month, every month, since she had arrived in this world, just begging for a way back. But nothing ever came of it.

I love you.

The last thing she said to him, and they just hadn't had enough time. He said her name. And the way he looked at her, before he had vanished...

What she would give for ten more seconds.

She wiped the tears from her cheeks, and turned to look inland. Mickey stood patiently by the Jeep, waiting for her, like always.

She took one final look up at the stars, squeezed her eyes shut and wished.

"I miss you," she whispered, then turned to walk away.

Martha Jones gazed up at the sky in awe. The Doctor had taken her to Farali, a planet where the night's sky was a bright purple and the stars sparkled brighter than diamonds. She squealed in excitement as dozens of shooting stars sped across the sky. Not stars – creatures, the Doctor had told her, like space squid, catching the currents in the atmosphere and darting back out into space.

The Doctor sat next to Martha in the field of tall blue grass, staring at the stars. As beautiful as the surroundings were, his mind was sombre, and one thought kept rolling around in his head.

She would have loved this.

All the places he had planned to take her, all the spectacles he had wanted her to see... in their brief time together they had only touched the tip of the iceberg. He could almost imagine her there with him. She would sit there next to him, close to him, maybe resting her head on his shoulder. He knew she'd try to give the squid names. He knew her eyes would light up brighter than the diamond stars. He knew she would be mesmerized, and she would be on the phone to her mum later to describe everything to her, and to remind her to pay the rent. He knew she would look at him with those big brown eyes that spoke louder than her voice ever could...

But then the breeze blew, and the grass swayed, and she was gone.

He let out a shuddery breath, and looked up at those ancient stars. He knew she couldn't see them.

The Doctor had never taken himself for a man of faith, but at this moment, it was all he had. He closed his eyes and wished.

"I miss you," he murmured.

"You say something?" Martha asked, not taking her eyes from the shooting stars.

"Nothing, nothing at all," he replied, his gaze lingering on the heavens.