Title: The Elephant in the Room
Author: DizzyDrea
Summary: Deeks learns why he shouldn't mess with Kensi.
Rating: T for one teensy swear word. Somebody's gonna get their mouth washed out with soap.
Spoilers: Season Two's Standoff
Author's Notes: I don't know where this came from. Really I don't. Except that I was looking for a little Callen/Kensi sweetness. Oh, and Deeks is annoying, and the idea that there's supposed to be chemistry between him and Kensi is laughable. So, I did something about it.
Disclaimer: NCIS and NCIS: Los Angeles and all its particulars are the property of CBS, Paramount, Donald P. Bellisario, Belisarius Productions, Shane Brennan, Shane Brennan Productions, and a lot of other people who aren't me. I am doing this for fun and for practice. Mostly for fun.

~&O&~

"You know what, Deeks? I've changed my mind. You are an idiot."

And with that, Kensi Blye got up from her desk in the bullpen and stalked off.

Marty Deeks just stared at her as she left, completely mystified as to what he'd done. Or said. Or whatever.

Letting out a heavy sigh, he slumped into the nearest chair. "Is it just me, or does she do this to all her partners?" he asked.

Sam Hanna, sitting at his desk reading the paper, looked up and gave Deeks a smirk. "Maybe you just get on her nerves. Wouldn't be the first time."

"Hey!" Deeks protested. He thought about that for a second, then shook his head. "No, I'm pretty charming, and easy to get along with. What's not to love?"

"Do you really want me to answer that?" Sam asked.

"Funny," Deeks said. "It's just—I'm her partner. You'd think she'd be a little nicer."

"Maybe," Sam said, lowering the paper a little more so he could look at their newest teammate unobstructed, "she'd respond better if you weren't constantly hitting on her."

"No, that's not it," Deeks said. Then he smiled. "Besides, what partner could resist me?"

Sam folded his paper and set it on the desk in front of him. "Did she tell you what happened to her last partner, Deeks?" he asked, completely serious now.

"Oh, I already stepped on that landmine, thank you very much," he said, grimacing. They'd been working their way through an abandoned warehouse, and he'd cracked a joke. Wrong move. "You're not saying she's trying to keep her distance because she expects me to die sometime in the near future?"

"No, I'm not saying that at all," Sam said. He leaned forward and rested his arms on the desk. "What I'm saying is that Dom was a good guy who didn't try too hard to make her like him. And he never tried to get a date with her."

"So if I stop trying to make her like me, she'll like me more?"

Sam leaned back and picked up the newspaper. "See? You're not as dumb as you look."

"Wait a minute—"

Light laughter drifted through the room, cutting off whatever he was about to say. Deeks swung his head in the direction of the sound, and saw Kensi standing at the foot of the stairs with their team leader, G Callen. They were standing close together, talking in low voices, smiling at each other. It was sweet, in a nauseating way.

"Are you kidding me?" he asked, jumping up and crossing to the opening in the bullpen for a better look.

Sam didn't need to look to know what Deeks was seeing. Still, he set down his paper and joined Deeks, giving a smile and a small laugh at how obvious his two co-workers were being. "C'mon," he said, smacking the other man on the shoulder as he moved away.

"Ow," Deeks said, rubbing his arm where the other man made contact. Still, he jogged to catch up, following Sam all the way outside. "What are we doing out here?"

Sam turned and faced the clueless cop. "We're out here because we don't talk about this in there."

"This? In there?" Deeks asked, confused. "What are you talking about?"

"I'm talking about the elephant in the room," Sam said. "G and Kensi."

"You mean that?" Deeks asked, pointing his thumb back toward the building. "That's a thing?"

Sam chuckled. "Yeah, it's a thing."

"I thought that was against the rules."

"Didn't stop you," Sam observed.

"Yeah, well," Deeks said, shrugging his shoulders. "I'm special."

"That's one way to look at it," Sam said.

"So, G and Kensi?" Deeks asked.

"Yeah, G and Kensi," Sam confirmed. "But the only way it works is if we keep it out of the office."

"Didn't look like they were doing a good job of that a few minutes ago," Deeks grumbled.

"What I saw was two colleagues having a friendly conversation," Sam said. "Wasn't that what you saw?"

"No," Deeks said. "I saw two people flirting outrageously with each other."

"No," Sam insisted. "You saw G having a friendly conversation with one of his team members. That's all anyone ever sees. That's how this works."

"Yeah, 'cuz I bet Hetty'd go batshit crazy if she ever found out, right?" Deeks asked, grinning. "I bet she'd go all Napoleon on them."

"I am exceedingly gratified that you hold such a high opinion of me and my ability to hold my temper, Mr. Deeks," a familiar voice said from somewhere behind him.

Sam smirked at Deeks. Slapping him on the shoulder, he moved around him and towards the door. "Good luck with that."

Deeks turned around and watched as Sam walked back into the building, passing Hetty Lange, their Operations Chief, on his way back inside.

"I'm curious, Mr. Deeks," she said, taking a step closer to where he stood, rooted to the spot. "Is it my diminutive stature that engenders the comparison to Napoleon, or is it my temperament?"

"I—it's just—I was—" Deeks stammered. His eyes darted around, hoping for an earthquake or some other disaster to come and swallow him whole. No such luck.

"Yes, Mr. Deeks?" she asked, taking another step closer.

"Sorry, Hetty, I didn't mean—"

"I know, Mr. Deeks," Hetty said, taking one more step to land directly in front of him. She crooked her finger, encouraging him to bend down to her level. Deeks complied, crouching down as he'd seen Nate do on many occasions.

"Everyone that I choose for my teams is eminently qualified for the position," she said, earning a confused look from Deeks. She ignored it and pressed on. "You are each the consummate professional, capable of holding your own, no matter the situation."

"Well, thanks, Hetty," Deeks said, smiling.

She frowned at him, and he muttered a quiet 'sorry'.

"You are also able to set aside any and all distractions in order to do your job. And when you can't, your teammates will always be there to watch your back." She paused, took a deep breath and finished her thought. "Mr. Callen and Ms. Blye are each accomplished professionals. I have never had to question their focus or determination to get the job done. What they do on their own time is their own business, until or unless it impacts the work we do."

"Oh, right, of course," Deeks said, agreeing immediately, hoping to escape intact.

"As for Mr. Hanna's assertion that our operation works smoother when we leave all distractions outside these doors, he is, of course, correct. That means all of us, Mr. Deeks."

"Absolutely," Deeks said, nodding furiously.

"Now, I believe there are still a few outstanding reports that you have yet to complete," Hetty said, stepping back as Deeks rose from his crouch.

"Right," Deeks said. "I'll just get on those right now."

He headed off towards the doors, intent on getting out of Hetty's line of fire.

"Oh, and Mr. Deeks," she called after him.

He cringed and spun around just inside the door. He'd been so close.

"Yes, Hetty?"

"Leave The Elephant alone," she said, a distinct twinkle in her eye.

"Yes, ma'am," he said, tossing off a lazy salute. Hetty frowned, and Deeks cringed once again. He gave a little wave and then escaped into the building.

"I see you survived," Sam said from somewhere just inside the door.

Deeks spun around. "You could have warned me," he said, pointing a finger at the other man.

Sam shrugged. "I did. You weren't listening."

"I meant sooner," he said. "You could have told me sooner so I didn't make a fool out of myself with Kensi."

"How long have I known you?" Sam asked.

"About six months," Deeks replied.

"And how long have I known G and Kensi?"

"Point taken," Deeks said, pointing at the other man.

"C'mon," Sam said, slapping him on the shoulder as he moved past him. "I'll buy you a cup of coffee. You're gonna need it if you're gonna finish those reports sometime this century."

"Just for curiosity's sake," Deeks said as he followed Sam into the bullpen. "How long do rookies get hazed around here?"

"Until the Rookie learns to keep his mouth shut," Callen said.

Deeks turned to see Kensi sitting back behind her desk and Callen leaning up against his. Both of them were smiling, leaving him with the distinct impression that they knew what had just happened. Which meant he'd be in for more hazing in the very near future.

Sam handed him a cup of coffee, and he took it and sat down at his desk, shuffling through papers as he shifted his mind back to work. Around him, the conversation sparked to life, Callen, Sam and Kensi joking and laughing.

He recognized, not for the first time, that he was the outsider here. He hadn't even noticed the connection between Callen and Kensi, which made him wonder how good of a detective he actually was.

He sighed, listening to the easy camaraderie flowing around him as he searched his desk for the forensics report he needed.

"Looking for this?"

Deeks' head popped up. Callen was holding out a piece of paper, which, when he looked at it, turned out to be the very report he'd been looking for.

"Yeah," he said, ghosting a smile. "Thanks."

"You're never gonna get that report done with your desk looking like this," Callen remarked.

Much to Deeks' astonishment, Callen began to sort through the papers on the desktop, piling them up according to some mystery filing system. Kensi joined him, and between the two of them, they set about organizing his paperwork, chatting back and forth with Sam, and occasionally throwing a comment his way.

He leaned back and watched as his teammates worked together to clean up his desk. Callen and Kensi didn't need to talk to each other to work in sync. They seemed to understand each other on a level he couldn't hope to reach. And for the first time since he arrived at NCIS, he got it. He got what made this team so special.

He caught Sam's eye, peeking over the top of his newspaper. Deeks smiled and nodded, and Sam winked back. The Elephant in the room might never be discussed, but he understood now what he hadn't before: it made them better together.

Leaning forward, he started typing on his laptop, joining the conversation, making himself as much a part of the group as he could. It wasn't what he'd expected when he'd first arrived at NCIS, but it was a start.

~Finis