I'm taking a break from my other SSBB story Inkblot, due to the fact that I realized last night that I seriously needed to revise about half of my plot, so apologies to anyone who's waiting on that…I'll get back to it as soon as I get things sorted out.

In the meantime, I have this fluffy, plot-bunny spawned thing. It's just one-shots. Maybe they'll connect to a higher meaning someday. Who knows? But I figured I'd upload the first chapter to see what people think. Rated T mostly for several sexual innuendos.

Anyway, read this, hopefully enjoy it, and then please review! I have a few chapters written of this already, but it's pretty sporadic. I just write for this whenever I hit a road-block with my other stuff….Now I'm rambling. I'm sorry. ;_;

Disclaimer: All of the SSBB characters and their respective items/stages whatever belong to Nintendo, not me. *sigh* If only, right?

Chapter 1: Boys' Locker Room

Link slouched through the doorway leading from the stage, rubbing at an angry red pattern on his cheek that had come from the net that hung around the stage, preventing serious injury on those who were launched off.

"Lucky little…." He trailed off, glancing at the mark on his face in one of the mirrors that hung over a row of porcelain sinks. "Argh…" He spread his arms out to grip the sides of the chipped sink, letting the Master Sword hang limply in his gloved fingers. After a minute, he glared up at his smudged reflection again, wincing as the cut on his face began to trickle blood down his neck, turning the green fabric of his tunic a muddy brown.

A roar went up from the crowds suddenly, with a loud scream cutting through the noise. Link assumed (correctly) that someone else had been thrown off of the platform. That only left two more…

After waiting for a minute without anyone coming into the locker room, Link decided that it must have been Sheik who had been thrown off. She would be going to the one on the opposite end of the stage. There were a total of three locker rooms placed around the Brawl stage; one for boys, one for the girls (obviously), and then an extra one for any non-humans like R.O.B. or Kirby.

Link, to his chagrin, had been talked into a four-way brawl earlier that morning. It had been a crowd pleaser mostly; take all of the guys with swords, throw them together, then toss in a random girl just to make things interesting. Link had hoped that Sheik would provide a bit of a distraction while he waited to take out Ike and Marth—the other two brawlers—with his bow, but that hadn't happened. He had been launched off right away by Marth's final smash; and Link wasn't even sure how the guy had managed to get hold of a smash ball, considering that they were only a few minutes into the fight.

"Stupid!" Link brought his fist down on the sink, making a satisfying sound that was somewhere between a 'chink' and a 'thwack.'

There was another crowd-scream from outside, this time accompanied by a very loud 'bang' that make Link drop his sword to cover his ears.

Within a few minutes, a crabby-looking Marth stomped into the locker room.

"Ike get you?" Link asked, noticing the traces of smoke that had followed Marth inside.

Marth muttered something profane as he shucked off his cape and armor, throwing them angrily across the room where they skittered against the floor before smashing into a locker.

"…such an idiot!" he hissed under his breath. "Ike is so slow! I should've moved."

"How do you think I feel?" Link pointed out.

"The fight was mine," Marth pouted, but Link could tell that he wasn't as upset as he had been a moment ago. Everyone was always hard on themselves when they were hit with a smash, considering the fact that nearly all of them were avoidable.

"So anyway," Marth continued, kicking his boots off as he spun the dial on his locker. "Are you scheduled for anything else this afternoon?"

Link had resumed examining his face. "Hmm?"

Marth turned around and finally noticed the red marks on his comrade's face that matched the pattern of the safety net. "Oh, ow. It looks like you got mauled by a cat. Does it hurt?"

"No, not at all."

Marth shrugged in response to Link's sarcasm and unbuttoned his tunic to his waist, pulling down the shoulders to examine a purpling bruise on his back. "Remind me again why we do this to ourselves every day."

Link finally decided that his face had stopped bleeding, detached himself from the mirror before Marth could call him a narcissist, and opened his own locker, triggering an avalanche of clothes.

Marth raised an eyebrow as he reached for a clean turtleneck shirt in his locker. Link noticed that Marth had a picture taken last year at the crazy New Year's Eve party taped to his locker door. Good times…

"Do you ever empty that thing out?" the prince asked. "I don't think you've worn any of these clothes since you shoved them in there six months ago."

"Nope." Link grinned. "Anyway, we do this to ourselves because it's fun. Where else can you beat on your friends all day?"

The blue-haired teenager craned his neck again to look at the bruise before he slid his shirt on.

"Relax," said Link. "It's just a bruise."

"Yes, well, when was the last time you took a direct hit from Ike?" Marth grumbled. "Have you seen how big his sword is? It's ridiculous. Something that big should be illegal."

Link chortled. "That's what she said."

Marth was about to snap Link over the head with a towel when Ike walked in, the victory laurel crown dangling around his neck.

"Good game," was all the taller man said as he tossed his huge sword onto a bench and started to undo his cape.

"Thanks," Marth replied politely. "You too." It was obvious he didn't really mean it.

Link glowered at both of them. Marth could be such a suck-up.

Marth pulled his crown from his hair and threw it at Link, saying "Think fast" as he threw it. Link just managed to snag it with his finger and examined the girly thing in his hands.

"And you wonder why the majority of people here still think you're a girl," he said, tossing the circle back to Marth after the latter had finished fixing the neck on the crimson turtleneck had had just put on.

"Oh shut up," Marth said sourly, putting the crown on his head again. As always, he was touchy about the whole gender thing, but in all honesty, if Link hadn't seen Marth shirtless in the locker room so many times, he may have doubted it too. "And you wonder why everyone still thinks you're a Christmas elf who got outsourced from the North Pole."

"Oi!" Link complained.

"Break it up," Ike spoke quietly from where he stood, but Marth and Link still stopped what they were doing (which was making a lunge for the other's throat), looking mollified. "Honestly, you two fight like lovers."

"HEY!" the other two shouted in unison as their faces turned bright red.

"I'm just saying," Ike said as he threw on a battered sweatshirt that looked like as if it had been washed a little too much over a pair of equally battered jeans. Were it not for his oddly colored hair, he looked like a normal young adult. That was how they all dressed outside of the stage. As Marth had once pointed out; cloaks and armor are all very nice in battles, but they're a pain when trying to live a modern life. Pit had once gotten his tunic stuck in the refrigerator door, and after that mind-scarring little incident everyone had started wearing more modern clothing.

Marth looked on the verge of saying something nasty, but Ike shoved past him to get to the door, almost as if he sensed the impending insult.

After he had gone, Link shot Marth a furious look. "'Elf?'" he asked dangerously.

"If you call me a girl you take what you get, my friend," Marth said, throwing his tunic down a conveniently-placed laundry chute. He shot Link a sideways look, his blue eyes sparkling. "I could call you wolf-boy, if you like?"

Link's jaw dropped. "You did not—!"

Marth grinned. "Yeah. We got Twilight Princess. We were playing it all night. It seems like you can't do anything on your own though, without your little fairy friend to help you."

"Shut—!" Link started, but Marth was already walking through the door. Furious, Link flipped the bird in Marth's general direction, and even though the prince obviously couldn't see it, it made Link feel a bit better.

"Dang it!" he hissed as he threw his sweaty and bloodstained tunic down the laundry chute as well. They had played Twilight Princess. Someone had taken extreme poetic license on that thing, in Link's opinion. He probably wouldn't be able to walk down the hallway without some jibe directed at him for at least a week.

Marth sucked.

Soooo…yep. Mostly just randomness. I always wonder what would happen if Link tried to play his own videogame. XD It'd also be incredibly embarrassing; especially if he couldn't do it.

Most of these (of the, like, 3 chapters that I have) follow the older teenagers (Marth, Ike, Link, Zelda, etc) with some of the younger kids and adults thrown in, FYI.

I am sooo brain-dead! ;_; If you see any errors, please point them out!

Please review! If people like this, then I can upload more. I'm also open to requests, so any suggestions about what to write about are appreciated. ;)