1. Djose Temple
The temple opens with flashes of lightning and flying rocks.
Yuna: Wow, that only happens when a summoner is speaking to the faith.
Tidus: I guess that explains the 'occupied sign'.
Just outside the chamber of the faith...
Dona: pounding on the door Are you going to take all day?
Issaru: Someone's in here!
2. In a "R" rated movie
Bouncer: I'm sorry milady summoner, you can't be in here without a parent or guardian.
Yuna: But, Tidus is my guardian!
3. Yuna: Fighting Sin.
Rikku: Trying to
save Spira.
Paine: Here we come just in time...
All: THE POWERPUFF GULLS!
4. Yuna Summons Anima. A giant chain thrusts itself into the earth and slowly rises holding the dark aeon. Anima falls off the chain...
Yuna: Damn! Fishes for another quarter
5. Bevelle Temple:
Wedding ceremony
All skiing down on the chains.
Tidus:
Dude, how'd you get down Lulu?
Lulu: humph
6. Lulu: If we face fiends in the water, we're counting on you three.
Tidus, Wakka, and Rikku fight their way through endless fish battles.
They climb out of the water and begin a battle with a behemoth. The party switches to Lulu.
Tidus: Okay, seriously, you've gotta tell me how you got here!
Lulu: Points to the bridge spanning the water level
7. Scene shatters in glass shards as a battle begins
Tidus: THEY GOT THE CAMERAMAN!
8. Fighting an Achelous underwater
Tidus attacks, achelous begins charging.
Wakka attacks, achelous charges.
Rikku steals...
Tidus: What happened?
Rikku: I got his credit card!
9. random monster hurts Tidus
Lulu pulls a potion out of her bra and throws it at him
Wakka: at full hitpoints Owww, I'm hurt too, ya.
10. Macalania Temple
Tidus: We've got to stop Yuna from marrying Seymour!
Annoucer: We interrupt this daring rescue to bring you -- a blitzball game.
11. Tidus: Listen to my story..
Villagers: He's trying to narrate, get him!
Tidus gets dogpiled
12. After seeing Jyscal's sphere
Tidus: But, then why is Yuna meeting Seymour alone?
Auron: She's trying to offer him something for a way to negotiate, but Seymour is the better negotiator...
Yuna and Seymour walk out together
Seymour: Thanks Yuna, I'll stop my plans for world destruction! Walks off carting a fifty gallon drum of hair gel
13. In the calm lands
Yuna: Y'know, I don't think we were ever actually introduced...
Tidus: Yeah, it's like people have an aversion to saying my name or something.
Yuna: Well you can tell me right?
Tidus: Of course, its...
End cut scene
14. Yuna and Tidus's marriage
Priest: Do you lady Yuna take... ummm... this guy to be your lawfully wedded husband?
15. Guadosalam
Guado guard: None may enter this house, it belonged to our great leader.
Yuna: Actually, I'm his grieving widow, and I want my money!
Guado Guard: What would you do with his inheritance anyway?
Yuna: Points at Yojimbo
16. Bevelle Temple
Seymour: I must be the one to kill her because she is my bride.
Kinoc: You can't just kill your wife.
Seymour: Actually, the Florida supreme court has declared I can, so nya!
17. Baaj temple
Tidus dives into the water. Tidus, Wakka, and Rikku fight past the monster into Anima's temple. Yuna approaches to pray to the faith.
Tidus: opens mouth ... Nevermind.
Lulu: Not gonna ask again?
Tidus: Just... Nevermind... I don't wanna know.
18. On Gagazet, right before Zanarkand
Auron: I remember being on this spot, as a young guardian about your age...
Wakka: Umm, I'm 23... If your you defeated Sin ten years ago... You're...
Rikku: 33?
Tidus: Wooow, time was not good to you.
Auron: GLARE
Tidus: I mean, you've been under a lot of stress and...
19. Zanarkand's temple
Tidus: You're unsent?
Rikku: That explains it, maybe dying aged him a lot.
Auron: Glares so hard he bursts a vein in his head and faints
Rikku: See? Stress.
20. Yunalesca: I will forge Spira a New Hope.
Yuna: You're more of a Phantom Menace!
Wakka: It's about time the people Strike Back!
Rikku: Are you guys just repeating stuff? This sounds like the Clone Wars...
21. Calm lands: Monster ranch
Tidus: Finally, I managed to catch a malboro for you.
SPCA Official: "You're under arrest for cruelty to an endangered species!"
22. Inside Sin
Yu Yevon possesses Yojimbo
Yojimbo: A-hem!
Yu Yevon: Ummm... searches non-existant pockets Raincheck?
Yojimbo: No.
Yu Yevon: Curses! Vanishes into nothing
23. Bahumat: You are a dream.
Tidus: I'm not a dream, I'm a real boy! (Nose grows)
24. Malboro 1: So, we're slimy, tentacle-y, cuthulian horrors.
Malboro 2: And we're named after cigarettes.
Malboro 3: Could we get more ostracized by society?
Perot: Wanna vote for a third party?
25. Tidus walks up to Belgamine, distraught
Tidus: I need to help Yuna!
Belgamine: Why are you asking me?
Tidus: You're the
only one who knows what happens in the beyond.
Belgamine:
What are you talking about?
Tidus: It's Yuna, she's in danger, she's married to a corpse! She has a corpse groom!
26. Bevelle
Priest: ... Till death do you part?
Seymour: That's a little redundant, isn't it?
Halloween Costumes:
Auron: "Boo"
Lulu: Paine's twin
Yuna: Zookeeper
Wakka:
A flamingo! (I don't know why, don't ask me)
Rikku: Kiki the ferret
Tidus: Pinnochio
Khimari: Garfield
Aeon's Calm Jobs
Valefor: Kite
Ifreet: BBQ pit
Shiva: Air conditioner
Ixion: Triple AAA jumper cable
Bahumat: Wheel of fortune wheel (Shock Vanna White!)
Yojimbo: Bouncer
Anima: Actor for "Silent Hill the Movie"
Magus Sisters: Stunt doubles for Charlie's Angels
Okay, this is only kinda a few years late, but it is done (kinda). I'm probably out of ideas on this, so its the last one. Hope you liked it.