Zoro's enjoying a rather vivid dream - in which he laughs maniacally as a defeated Mihawk licks his boots and proclaims him the great swordsman ever - when he's abruptly awakened by what feels like an octopus experiencing a seizure directly on top of him.

His brain's not working too well thanks to the consumption of enough alcohol to kill several people of lower body weight after Luffy's insistence that they celebrate their recent victories and welcome retrieved, returned and new nakama alike. He thinks that between himself and the others, the Straw Hats may have actually decimated all of the barrels loaded onto the ship prior to their departure from Water Seven.

It takes the groggy swordsman nearly sixty seconds to realize that it's not a sea creature escaped from the fish tank but rather his sleeping captain that's assaulting him. He vaguely remembers climbing into his bunk with the drunken rubber man latched onto him like one of the lampreys that Usopp and Chopper caught the morning before.

"Oi," he mutters, grimacing at the horrid taste in his mouth, as he grasps the smaller pirate's shoulder and gives him a nudge.

He's rewarded for his efforts with a fist in the face.

Sleeping with Luffy is dangerous, especially when he's dreaming, which appears to be the case now. He's unpredictable enough when he's awake and prone to accidentally injuring his crewmates, but the odds of being smacked, kicked or bitten increase ridiculously when he's comatose. And his aim is deadlier.

Ignoring his smarting eye, Zoro grabs his captain by both shoulders and shakes him like a rag doll. Luffy utters a startled cry as he bolts upright, flinging an uppercut which the swordsman narrowly avoids. Unfortunately, he doesn't escape the other fist, which clips him on the left ear and leaves his head ringing.

"Wake up and stop hitting me!"

Luffy freezes at the sound of the familiar voice, breathing in short, shallow gasps. When he stretches out both hands in the dark and pats tentatively about him, he encounters an equally familiar face and makes a small noise of relief. "Z-Zoro?"

Flinching back from the fingers poking at his nostrils, Zoro grabs Luffy's wrists and relocates them to where they're less likely to do him bodily harm. "You were dreaming."

When Luffy sinks back down onto his chest and wraps both arms tightly around him, the swordsman lays a hand on his back. He's slightly alarmed to discover that his crewmate is shivering; it's a warm enough night that everyone went to bed stripped down to the bare minimum. "Luffy?"

He doesn't understand the mumbled reply because the captain's face is smashed against his collarbone, but the way Luffy's back and shoulders hitch under his palm speaks clearly enough. He closes his eyes and lets the younger boy cry soundlessly against him, thinking that this is a bit overdue considering recent events, and rubs small circles with his fingertips.

He wonders what featured most prominently in his captain's dreams. The desperate race to save Robin? The falling out with Usopp and his subsequent departure? Merry, burning?

When Luffy finally calms down and raises his head, he leaves Zoro's chest damp with tears and snot, but the swordsman doesn't complain. He runs his fingers through the tousled dark hair that he can't see, and Luffy sighs and leans into his touch.

They're both silent for a moment, and then Luffy says, "Zoro got kidnapped by a bear."

"A what?" Zoro asks, thinking he's heard wrong. Because there's no way a stupid dream about a bear made Luffy cry. "I got kidnapped by a what?"

"A bear." Luffy repeats, now sounding a bit annoyed. "A really big one. It beat Zoro up and then ran off with him."

Zoro snorts. "A bear? Luffy, it's just that damn ero-cook's crappy food giving you nightmares."

"Oi, I heard that, shitty Marimo," another voice grumbles in the darkness.

"Shut the hell up and go back to sleep, asshole ero-cook."

Light blooms across the ceiling as a lantern glows to life, and Sanji's head comes into view as he struggles out of his bunk and stands up. "I would, but Franky's shift is over in twenty minutes, and some shithead talked the captain into rearranging the watches so he could drink more."

He glances over at Luffy and sees the drying tear-tracks on his face but pretends he doesn't notice. "I'm going to make myself a cup of coffee. You want some hot cocoa, Luffy?"

Luffy scrubs his arm over his face and leans over the bunk's edge. "I want coffee too!"

"Forget it," Zoro and Sanji say in unison and glare at each other.

In the bunk below, Usopp rolls over and sleepily mumbles something about defeating a two-headed tiger while simultaneously plugging a leaking hole in a dam with his pinkie finger to keep a village from flooding. He's ignored.

"Doctor and Doctorine used to give me hot cocoa when I had bad dreams."

Everyone glances over to find Chopper sitting up in his bunk and peering across at them. He eyes Sanji with hopeful starry eyes and the cook laughs. "Sure, I'll make one for you too. But Marimo doesn't get any."

"Like I want your shitty coffee -or- your shitty cocoa."

Zoro rests his hands behind his head and dozes while they wait for the cook to return. Luffy sits on his stomach and whispers back and forth with Chopper, both of them clapping their hands (and hooves) over their mouths and giggling whenever they get too loud and Usopp starts thrashing around and challenging dream foes.

It's not long before Sanji returns, balancing two steaming mugs on a tray. He passes the first to Chopper, handing it carefully over the side of the bunk and gleefully ignoring the way Luffy bounces impatiently on Zoro and startles the napping swordsman awake. "That shitty old man used to make this for me, whenever I had trouble sleeping."

He gives the remaining mug up to Luffy, who gleefully wraps both hands around it and lifts it to his mouth.

"Don't burn yourself. It's h-"

Too late, because the eager captain's already fanning frantically at his mouth and making noises like a dying locomotive, causing the swordsman stretched out under him to watch cautiously as the mug shakes in Luffy's hand. Chopper snickers as he sits blowing across the top of his mug to cool it.

When he's finally convinced that Luffy isn't about to drop a whole cup of hot cocoa on him, Zoro closes his eyes and listens to the murmur of voices around him. After a few minutes, he hears Sanji excuse himself and the door clicking shut.

Luffy and Chopper are discussing which is better - hot cocoa or partially melted chocolate bars - when Usopp bolts upright, shouting, "Captain Usopp to the rescue!"

The sniper, still mostly asleep, slams his head into the underside of Zoro's bunk, sending the whole rig swaying back and forth. Startled, Luffy fumbles his mug and hot liquid sloshes out and splashes directly onto the snoozing swordsman's bare chest.

The resulting roar of pain is loud enough to wake Usopp, as well as the girls sleeping upstairs. When Nami bursts into the room and demands to know what the hell's going on, she's greeted by the sight of Usopp speeding around and around the men's quarters, fleeing an enraged Zoro. The only thing keeping the sniper alive is Luffy, who is wrapped around the swordsman's middle and cackling like a demented monkey.

They charge past her out the door and across the lawn, followed closely by Chopper, who is screaming at Zoro to stop and let him take a look at what are probably second-degree burns.

"They look like they're having fun," Robin muses sleepily from where she stands by the staircase.

xxx

Thirty-five minutes, half a tube of burn cream and one bandaged sniper later, everyone stumbles off to their bunks, hoping to get at least another hour's sleep before the sun comes up. Luffy curls up at Zoro's side, pillowing his head on the swordsman's stomach.

It's very quiet for a while except for Usopp's faint snoring and muttering, and Luffy's so still that Zoro, who's having trouble falling asleep because his chest itches like mad under the dressing Chopper applied, thinks his captain's fallen asleep. He's just finally starting to doze off when a voice breaks the silence.

"Hey, Zoro?" Luffy asks somberly.

"Hrrm?"

"Don't get beat up or kidnapped by any bears."

"…"

"Cause I need Zoro."

The swordsman smiles into the darkness even though he knows his captain can't see his face. "I'm not going anywhere, Luffy. But I'll keep an eye out for bears."