Title: MUHHHUMPH is not really much of an answer.

Tag: Blaine is trying to have a serious conversation. Kurt is trying not to cum.

Rating: M

Word Count: 1,107

I don't own glee

Kurt slipped into his room, sighing his relief that none of the other boys had spotted him and his purchases. Sure Dalton had a no bullying policy, but Kurt wasn't sure that he wanted Wes and David to see him with a bag from a sex shop.

Or Blaine. Especially not him.

Kurt flopped on his bed letting the bag fall on the floor. He was defiantly not thinking of what Blaine would do if he found the lube and condoms in Kurt's room right now.

He was certainly not going to imagining Blaine's lips sliding down his neck to his nipples. Not when he unbuckled his pants and reached for his new vibrator. He was not going to imagining Blaine's hand urging him closer and Blaine's chest pressed against his as the vibrator was covered in lube and pressed slowly into his hole. Kurt could feel himself stretching slowly ever wider over the cool plastic.

Kurt let out a cry as he imagined Blaine's lips against his ear, and the soft gasps that Blaine would make, at the thrusting of Kurt's tongue, in time with the thrusting of the vibrator. He took the controller in his other hand and turned it to the first setting.

This was almost too much for Kurt. He held his cock and started moving his hand up and down the engorged shaft. Flesh on flesh, made slippery but the pre cum he was leaking all over himself.

"Kurt," moaned imaginary Blaine.

"Yes!" Kurt replied.

Kurt stopped his movements as he heard a knocking sound. What was that? And where was it coming from?

"Kurt?" imaginary Blaine seemed puzzled too.

Wait. Kurt opened an eyelid and saw his door slowly opening a crack.

"Kurt, are you there?" the very real Blaine called form the other side of the partially open door.

Fuck. And Kurt didn't mean it literally either. Kurt zipped up his pants threw his legs over the side of the bed and kicked the sex shop bag and all its incriminating contents under the bed in one smooth movement.

"Yes?" Kurt managed. Just in time too as he saw Blaine's head peeking around the edge of the door.

"Can I talk to you for a minute?" Blaine asked entering the room looking just as sexy as Kurt's imaginary Blaine.

Great, thought Kurt .Blaine is now in my room and I still have a raging hard-on. Well at least my pants are on, right?

He shifted uncomfortably and was violently reminded that the vibrator that was still in his ass, and turned on.

Damn it! Kurt felt the small object shift again inside of him causing fresh waves of pleasure. It was still vibrating slowly, like a tiny pulsing heart deep inside of him.

"I really don't know how to start but..."Kurt hardly heard the other boy thought the haze of lust that was obstructing his senses

As Blaine perched casually beside him Kurt realized that, however improbable, things had actually just got worse. The remote control was under the covers beside him... right under Blaine.

"Listen, Kurt. I have to tell you that I've been thinking about our relationship and..."

Should he tell Blaine about the vibrator that was sending chills up his spine in spasms?

Right, like their relationship needed to be any MORE awkward.

"...and I really care for you, in that way... but in other ways too... I want..." Blaine paused and looked him right in the eye.

Kurt didn't want to have to explain to Blaine all the things that he wanted them to do right now.

"Are you even listening to me?" Blaine reached out and put his on Kurt's knee innocently. Well Blaine was doing it innocently. Kurt, however, felt the heat from Blaine's hand reach up and stroke his groin, just like he wanted the real Blaine to do right now.

Kurt felt the shock jerk his head upwards before he could bring it back down with a firm reprimand. Blaine seemed to take this as a cue to keep talking. Kurt bit his lip withholding the high pitched scream that he felt building at the back of his throat.

It was really a mistake for Kurt to be thinking about throats at a time like this. He had to look beyond Blaine's throat. Like to his mouth? The thought flashed through Kurt's mind. And then his mind's eye elaborated on Blaine's mouth sucking at the uncomfortable throbbing in his pants. His wet tongue, licking down the shaft to his-

"What I'm trying to tell you is that..." Blaine shifted towards Kurt again, simultaneously turning the vibrator to full speed and shifting his hand so that a fresh wave of heat moved up to Kurt's groin.

Ahhhhhh! Kurt tried fruitlessly to stop his body from moving under the caress, desperately clenching all the muscles in his lower half. Unfortunately for Kurt all that did was clench the muscles around the vibrator shifting it harder against his prostate, the feelings of the intensified vibrations spreading outwards from deep inside.

Blaine's face was so close and lip lips were moving softly, as his eyes stared up earnestly into Kurt's. All soft and hazel filled with longing. "...is that I want you to be my boyfriend."

Kurt was concentrating so hard on not thinking about Blaine that he couldn't even remember what the other boy had been saying.

"MUHHHUMPH," slipped out of his swollen lips.

"Kurt, did you hear me? I-"

"I have to go." Kurt looked away from Blaine's searching eyes... And spotted the bathroom! Of course! A solution! "...to the bathroom. Excuse me" Kurt tried to keep his voice even but he could hear it shaking.

He couldn't even look at Blaine as he stumbled to the bathroom door and slammed the door shut.

Kurt ripped off his pants and turned on the taps so he wouldn't be heard in the next room.

It didn't take much friction from his hand on his dick for his whole body to be shuddering in relief.

"Blaine," he whispered as he came all over the sink.

He removed the vibrator carefully and hid it in the cupboard and quickly wiped off the sink, and turned off the water before he replaced his pants. He took a final deep and fortifying breath then opened the door to his room.

"OK, what were you saying Blaine? I didn't really hear that last-" he admitted guiltily. Kurt stopped mid-sentence as the bathroom door crept open to reveal and empty but rumpled bed and the door to the hallway open a crack.

Well not entirely empty, Kurt could see as he got closer. There was a note where the other boy had previously been sitting.

I get it. I promise to not bring it up again. I care about you, if you don't feel the same I won't be another Karofsky. You deserve to feel safe. I want you to be happy. I hope we can still be friends. –Blaine

Fuck my life Kurt suddenly had the urge to hit his head on something solid a couple of times.

A/N: This is my first time writing a fanfic EVER! In my entire EXSISTANCE! I am so new that a month ago I had been wondering who "An" was and why she got to say something before or after the story. It pleases me to say that I have come a long way since then.

So I am excited to be finally writing one of my own. (and a little power mad, where is Wes's gavel when you need it? MUHAHAHAHAHA!)

I get annoyed at authors that tell me to R&R (a month ago I thought it meant rest and recuperate. No joke.) or anyone who tries to tell me to do something I feel should be optional. So I am just going to say that if you do take the time to leave me a message it will make me ridiculously excited!

There may be a sequel to this depending if anyone reads it or not.

Lastly thanks to my friend Kat who encouraged me and distracted me in equal measure while writing this. I wouldn't have done it without you! Seeing how no one else seems to be able to put up with my crazy as well as you! (And just for future reference writing M rated fanfic whilst sitting beside your mother in a car is very uncomfortable)