I have to write a Comedy short story for my Creative Writing class... I hate writing comedy. It sucks.

Chapter 2 – The Cursed Medic.

Kakashi walked into the small one bedroom apartment. The front room which consisted of a living room and a small bar extruding from the wall that seperated the living room from the kitchen. Their was a door on the back wall that lead to the bedroom which had a small bathroom. The living room that he was now standing in had a small couch with a small table that was currently covered in different scrolls. A quick exception of the scrolls showed that they were all of the human anatomy and different poisons and cures of the world.

"Long time no see Kakashi-kun." A voice called form above him. Kakashi looked up from his little orange book to find a boy wearing black combat pants and boots with a whit no sleeve muscle shirt that had a red cross over his heart. The boy had medium length blood hair and three whisker marks on each cheek. He was currently sitting crossed legged on the ceiling reading a scroll on chakra scalpels and its uses.

"Chakra control exercise Naruto-kun?" Kakashi asked as he looked back to his small perverted book.

"Exactly." Naruro rolled the scroll back up before dropping from the ceiling. Flipping in the air he landed next to Kakashi and dropped the scroll onto the small table. "So why are you here? It shouldn't be about Rin-chan, you know that she doesn't contact me either." Both of them saddened slightly at the thought of their old friend and teammate. Kakashi had tried to find her for a week after she left. When he had come back he had found Naruto waiting for him. After Naruto told him about everything Rin had told him they had become good friends and they had both sworn to find her one day.

"Hokage-sama wanted to talk to you about something."

The boys eyebrow raised slightly. "About what?"

Kakashi shrugged. "He didn't say but if I had to guess I would say it would be about the genin test next week."

"Genin test?" Naruto asked. He was twelve years old meaning he was the right age to become a genin but he hadn't gone to the academy because he had chosen to study to become a Medic instead. "But I haven't gone to the academy and he knows that I want to become a Medic not a Genin." Naruto attempted to look Kakashi into his eye but the Copy-nin kept moving his book in the way. "You wouldn't know anything about that you would Kakashi?" Naruto asked as he snatched the perv's book away with the speed he had aqcuired threw six years of training.

Kakashi chuckled nervously and rubbed the back of his neck. "I might have asked the Sandaime to make you a Medic-nin on my team."

"Why?"

"Well I thought about how Rin-chan had saved our team over and over again after battles. Even if it was only a small cut she gave us the advantage of being in great health while our opponents that didn't have a medic had to fight with wounds form previous battles." Kakashi recalled as he thought about how, with out her he never would of gotten the sharigan eye and Obito's memory would of died completely that day.

"Okay that explains why he wants me to join the academy and take the test but what happens when I go to take the test and I fail the written and taijutsu portion?" Naruto said skeptically.

"You could pass the taijutsu portion." Kakashi said. "Your speed is Jonin level and that's with the gravity seals on. You will be able to hit them without them even seeing you." Kakashi had placed gravity seals on the boy when he was younger so he could increase his speed and strength.

Naruto rolled his eyes. "You know that I don't like to fight. That's why I trained my speed so I would never have to fight. I could just run around the enemy until back up arrives or I take him out using the least amount of chakra possible."

"You really took what your mom put in those scrolls to heart didn't you?" Kakashi asked. It had been three years since he had gotten all of his mothers scrolls and since then he had read each scroll once a day until he had them committed to memory.

"And shepherds we shall be, for thee my lord for thee. Power hath descended forth from thy hand so our feet may swiftly carry out thy command. And we shall flow a river forth to thee and teeming with souls shall it ever be." Naruto said with his eyes closed.

"Kushina's prayer." Kakashi had only heard that prayer twice in his life. Both of the times were when he was on the field with Kushina. After every battle when she took a life she would stop and say that prayer over their body, or whatever was left of it. She must of written it down in one of the scrolls so Naruto could learn it to.

Naruto nodded. "I have decided to make it into my families prayer. It will be something that I teach my children, if I ever have any." He whispered the last part, but Kakashi was still able to hear it. 'So you still believe that you don't deserve love because of what you can't control.' Kakashi thought sadly. Naruto had learned about his curse when he had tried to use Mystical Palm Technique. He was trying to bring a dead fish back to life as one of the exercises, he was getting closer but he was running out of chakra so he subconsciously pulled some of the Kyubi's chakra which resulted in the technique turning red and the fish to become infected with the Kyubi's chakra which resulted in chakra poisoning that destroyed the fishes tissues. He was so scared that he ran to the Hokage and tried to figure out what happened. The Hokage couldn't figure out a way to explain it so he had to tell the boy. Naruto had accepted it but he now felt that he didn't deserve love.

"We should go." Naruto said as he walked out of his small apartment, avoiding any questions Kakashi might have tried to ask him. Kakashi quickly caught up to him as they took to the roof tops to get to the Hokage's Office as fast as possible. The trip was silent as Naruto kept slightly ahead of Kakashi to avoid all questions. As they came up to the Hokage's Office Naruto jumped up to the window that lead to the Sandaime's Office. Kakashi shook his head at Naruto's antics before following the boy who had just opened the window and jumped in.

"So you're sending me to the Academy Old-Man?" Naruto more said than asked as he landed in the office. The Sandaime simply looked up from his paper work before looking back down.

"Kakashi-kun requested that you be put on his team and I felt that it would be a good idea." The Old-Man spoke as Kakashi landed next to Naruto who had taken the seat across from the Hokage.

"I thought that we agreed that I would become a Medic at the hospital next week." Naruto said with his eyebrow raised.

"You will still be able to help out at the Hospital when your not on a mission with your team." The Sandaime grabbed a new paper and began to read it. "And if you do well I might be able to start a new program that will put a Medic-nin on every team." He signed the paper and placed it on top of a pile before looking at Naruto.

"So that's why your doing this." Naruto said as everything began to make since. "You are using me as a way to force the council into starting a Medic-nin program."

The Sandaime nodded. "I had tried to force them to do it with the help of my old student but they had denied the request saying it was a waist of resources but now that I am able to put a Medic-nin on a team we might be able to get the influence we need to start the program."

Naruto glared at the old man. "Normally I would say fuck off but if your able to pull this off, our mission casualties will drop by at least seventy percent." The blond Medic let out a deep sigh. "Fine I'll help but only on one condition." After a quick nod from the Old-Man he continued. "I'll go to the last week of the Academy but I automatically pass no matter what. I don't want to take that stupid damn written test and I don't feel like fighting with some kid. You already know that I can do Kage Bunshin and you know all of the Medical Jutsus I can do." The Sandaime and Kakashi had to give it to him. Naruto could of past the test two years ago when they had taught him the Kage Bunshin at his request. The blonde had argued that his mother had found that she could help more people using Kage Bushin and she was able to dodge enemy attacks easier when the enemy couldn't figure out which one was real or the Bunshin.

"Deal." The Sandaime held out his hand which Naruto quickly took and shook.

"So when do I start?" The blonde asked as he leaned back into his chair.

"Class has already started today so you might as well just wait until tomorrow."

"What can you tell me about the-" Naruto was interrupted by a puff of smoke that filled the large office. Naruto and Kakashi instantly stood in front of the Hokage both ready to attack. No movement could be seen thru the thick smoke as they waited for it to clear. Slowly the men were able to make out three bodies laying on the ground. Two men and a women lay on the ground with blood covering their bodies. As soon as Naruto saw the Konoha Forehead protectors he created two clones to take care of the men while he moved to the girl with violet hair. She seemed to be the only one conscious so he figured she was the one who Shunshine the three of them here. His hands began to glow a light green as he ran his hands over her body.

Three broken ribs with two lacerations on her stomach. No organs were hit but she has lost a lot of blood and she is suffering from chakra exhaustion, most likely from Shunshining herself and two other men across a large distance. Running threw a few quick hand seals to start he Mystic Palm Technique he placed his hand over the two lacerations on her stomach. The wound instantly began to heal, the cells regenerating at a fast pace, it only took a few minutes before two cuts were completely gone not even leaving a scar. Opening the girls trench coat he began to heal the three cracked rips. The three bones took longer to regenerate and connect together but the processes was still complete in about ten minutes.

"My man is stable."

"So is mine." Both clones said as they stood up and wiped the blood off of their hands.

Naruto nodded once after looking over both of the men. "Take them to the Hostpital for observation." He ordered. Both clones saluted before they picked the men up bridal style and disappeared threw the still open window. Naruto looked back at the girl who was now breathing steadily. Activating a quick analyzing jutsu and began slowly running his hand from her feet up, all seemed to be good until he reached her neck where he found an abnormality. It reminded him of a cancerous tumor but it seemed to be chakra based. Canceling the justu he reached down to move her coat and fishnet shirt but as his hand came into contact with the tan coat the girl suddenly awakened and snapped her hands up catching his wrists.

"What do you think your doing?" She asked as she glared daggers at the blonde medic. He gave her a warm smile as he slowly pulled his hands away and held them palm up to show he meant no harm.

"You and two others Shunshine into the Hokage's Office." He said pointing to where the Hokage and Kakashi were watching form in front of the desk. "I'm a medic so when I saw that you were all injured I made two clones and healed you all. Your teammates have already been moved to the Hospital. I would of taken you there to, but I found what looks like a cancerous tumor on your neck but it seems to be chakra based." The girls eyes darkened slightly further driving Naruto's curiosity to know what the chakra tumor was. "Would you happen to know what it is?" I asked the girl who looked up to the Hokage as if asking for permission.

"Its called a Curse Seal." The Hokage answered for the girl. "My old student Orochimaru put it on her before he left. From what we are able to tell, its designed to drive the person insane with thoughts of power until they either die or seek Orochimaru out and give him their undying loyalty. Anko-chan here has an earlier version of the seal so she is able to fight it better then anyone else but it still takes a toll on her. We also suspect that Orochimaru could possible control or harm her with it if they were to ever fight." The girl, now named Anko, had sat up and was clenching her fists. She apparently hated the man but Naruto couldn't really blame the girl.

"Do you mind if I look at it?" The Medic asked.

Anko shook her head as she slipped her trench coat down and pulled the neck of her shirt passed her shoulder revealing a seal made up of three tomoe. "Jirayia-sama and Kakashi-kun have both looked at it and attempted to seal it but nothing has worked so I doubt you could do anything about it." Her voice was filled with disappointment at she thought of how they would never get this damn seal off of her.

Naruto's hand began to glow green again as he analyzed the seal. He was right when he said it was chakra based but it was a lot more complicated then that. For one the chakra was...evil was the only way to describe it, it was nothing compared to the Kyubi's chakra but it still gave off a creepy feeling. He closed his eyes as he looked deeper into the seal. He found where the chakra was connected to Anko's chakra network, which would make the seal difficult to erase but it still should have been possible to get rid of the damn thing. He frowned as he found that a portion of the seal seemed to have bonded with her tissue and ran to the back of her spine, which explained why they couldn't do anything about the seal. They didn't just have to disconnect it from her chakra network they would have had to kill the tissue that the seal had infected but the problem with that is that it would of either killed her or seriously injured her, and that's even if they were able to kill the tissue which would be close to impossible for any other medic. But he had a way to do it...but it would take a lot of focus and she would need to be at full strength if they even wanted to attempt at it.

"I can destroy it." Naruto stated surprising the occupants in the room. Two of the best seal masters in the world had failed to destroy the seal but now this twelve year old medic claims that he can destroy it after three minutes of analyzing it.

"Impossible." Kakashi said. Not believing that the boy could do what he himself had failed. "We have tried every seal we knew on it and nothing worked."

"Tell me what all you know about how the seal has bound with her body?" Naruto asked as he slipped her shirt and coat back on so she wouldn't irritate her ribs or stomach, her stomach would be sore for the next twenty-four hours but her rips would cause her pain for the next few days.

"We had it checked by medics and a Hyuga that informed us that the chakra that is emitted from the seal and connected with her chakra system." Kakashi answered.

"Well that's half of it but your missing the fact that the seal has bonded with her tissue of her shoulder and spine which is why you were never able to cancel the seal." Everyone looked shocked at the analysis. All of them were present as the Chief of Medicine at Konoha's Hostpital had inspected the seal, so the question running threw their minds was either Naruto was wrong or the Chief had made a huge mistake by missing a vital part of the seals function.

"You said that it had bonded with the tissue on her spine. How exactly do you plane to get rid of the tissue without killing or crippling her for life?" The Hokage asked as he pulled out his pipe and lit the tobacco with a small fire jutsu.

"You shouldn't smoke, its bad for you." Naruto scolded the Old-Man who just shrugged off the comment.

"With my job the last thing I have to worry about is cancer." The Old-Man said. It was no secret that only about ten percent of Shinobi died of old age or sickness but Naruto still thought it was a horrible habit to smoke.

"I doubt you will feel that way when your fighting an opponent but you can't finish the fight because you begin to cough up blood." The blonde medic said much to the amusement of Kakashi and Anko. It's not everyday that you got to see one of the strongest Shinobi in the world be scolded by a boy sixty years his junior.

"To answer your question I have been working on a technique that infuses a small controlled dose of the Kyubi's chakra into my Mystic Palm Technique. I had intended to use it in order to place the Kyubi's chakra into a poison that runs threw the victims system. The Kyubi's chakra should destroy the poison and then I would extract the chakra before it could do damage to the victims cells then by allowing the Mystic Palm Technique sit it would heal the victim and prevent any possible damage caused by the Kyubi's chakra." Naruto now sounded like he was speaking more to himself then the people around him.

"So your planning to use the Kyubi's chakra to kill the infected tissue and use your chakra to keep her spine stable and then replace the cells you destroy with uninfected cells." Kakashi summarized. 'Its a good idea and it could possible work but we would have to test it with simple poisons before we attempted to destroy the seal.' Kakashi thought to himself.

"Exactly. And as soon as I finished destroying the infected tissue you or Jirayia-san would come in and seal the chakra portion of the seal." Naruto finished before he felt the clones pop out of existence. They had gotten the men to the Hospital where another Doctor took over and placed them on the machines. They had popped from existence after they were stable, but one of the clones had caught one of the male nurses glaring at him and fidgeting with something in his scrubs pocket. Naruto placed the thought in the back of his mind thinking it was just some Kyubi hater that held a grudge against him.

"Your teammates are at the hospital and they are stable for a moment." Naruto told Anko as he helped her to the chair in front of the Hokage's desk.

"Can we destroy this damn seal now?" Anko asked hopefully.

Naruto shook his head a few times as he closed his eyes in deep thought. "I will need to test the technique on poison victims before we even think of doing the operation. And you would need to be at full strength in order to survive the operation so I'm going to recommend that you cease all missions and only do light training for the next two months."

"TWO MONTHS!" Anko yelled and attempted to jump up but fell back into her chair when her rips stung.

"No sudden movements." The blonde medic ordered as she pushed her down. "And do you want to get rid of the seal or not?" He asked with a raised eyebrow. She dropped her head and looked at the floor. "That's what I thought. So no missions and only light training for two months, maybe you could help the sensie's of the rookie teams this year." Naruto suggested but stopped when Kakashi started to shake his head furiously and making cutting motions across his neck. The blonde medic felt his stomach drop when he saw the sadistic smile spread across Anko's face. 'What have I done?' He thought to himself as she licked her lips.

The Sandaime cleared his throat to get the attention of the two Shinobi and Medic. "Now that that is cleared up we should move on to why you and your team appeared in my office with multiple wounds when I sent you on a B-ranked mission to clear a group of bandits?"

Anko growled sending shivers down the men's spines. "Who ever hired us lied about the mission specs. It wasn't just a group of bandits it was about twenty mercenaries with four Jonin missing-nin from Iwa. They took out both my teammates before we could even fight back, I was lucky that I was able to summon a snake to distract them long enough for me to grab my teammates and escape. I was running out of energy so I had to use Shunshin to get us to Konoha. I was planning on getting to the wall but I must of came here out of habit."

"That explains the chakra exhaustion that you are suffering from while your teammates reserves were almost full." Naruto said when she was done.

"I'll send a group of ANBU to see if they are still in the area and take care of them if they are." The Sandaime said as he scribbled something down a piece of paper.

"Its time to get you to the Hospital Anko-san." Naruto said as he picked the older girl up bridal style.

She smiled sadistically before leaning close to his ear. "Call me Anko-chan. You have earned the right Naruto-kun." She purred seductively into his ear.

"And who said you have earned the right to call me kun, Anko-chan." He said with a husky voice causing Anko to blush. Naruto smirked before he disappeared out the window running at a speed that surprised Anko. Back in the Hokage's Office Kakashi and the Sandaime sat staring at the spot the two had been standing in just a few seconds ago. Neither of them had ever thought Anko would be beaten at her own game, especially by a teen that was at least ten years younger then her.

Naruto arrived at the Hospital about a minute after leaving the Hokage and Kakashi. He walked into the Hospital with the girl still in his arms.

"YOU DEMON! What did you do to them?" The Nurse behind the front desk yelled when she saw Naruto walk in. Another Nurse tried to take Anko from him but stopped when Naruto glared at him.

"What is the meaning of this?" Naruto asked as he looked around for a Non-Kyubi hater. He had been coming to the Hospital for years now to get lessons and help when he could. He had learn fast that most of the Doctors liked him but only a select few Nurses did. He quickly spotted a blue haired nurse by the name of Aikyo come out of patients room when she heard the screaming. She was one of the only Nurses that liked Naruto so he quickly walked up to her.

"Whats happening around here Aikyo-chan?" He asked as he looked at all of the Nurses and civilians glaring daggers at him.

"The two Shinobi your clones brought in earlier suddenly became critical. When we attempted to get them stabilized we found that they were poised with chakra poisoning that was common after fighting with one of the tailed demons. They both died before we could do anything. As of right now everyone is blaming you for their deaths. Someones spreading a rumor that you had infected them with your special chakra and that you meant to do it." She said as she lead him and Anko towards the Morgue.

"What does the Chief think?" Naruto asked as they entered the cold room. He gently placed Anko onto an empty table. She shivered when the cold metal touched her bare skin. "Sorry." Naruto apologized quickly as he grabbed a lab coat from the wall and covered her with it before he turned to the two cold bodies on the tables near the wall. His hands began to glow green as he started to examine the first body.

"The Chief isn't going to make a decision until you got to do an autopsy." Aikyo said as she moved to his side and watched as he moved between the two bodies.

As Naruto examined the bodies he found that all of their symptoms matched chakra poisoning but something was off. If it was him he would be able to find traces of the Kyubi's chakra but he could find none. As he moved to one of the mans legs he found a small puncture mark on the back of his knee, quickly moving to the second man he found a mark in the same area.

"Aikyo-chan look at the back right knee on each man." He said as he moved further up to the first mans neck. Aikyo raised one of her eyebrows but did what he said. Her hands glowed green as she started to examine the mens knees.

It only took a few seconds before she let out a small gasp. "They have identical puncture marks on that back of their knees." She said. "But why would they have puncture wounds?" She asked as she moved to his side as he stopped the jutsu and let his hands drop to his sides.

"Because someone wanted to frame me by poisoning the two men." Naruto said as he picked up the mens charts.

"But we checked their blood already and we didn't find anything."

"You didn't find anything because the poison isn't in their blood stream. Its in their chakra networks." He said as he but the charts back. "Call the Chief and get an Hyuga down here. Tell them to use his Byakugan to look at their chakra networks. They will find black spots running threw out their chakra."

"Where will you go?" Aikyo asked as she grabbed the phone attached to the wall.

"If someone is trying to frame me by killing my patients they might try to get Anko-chan too, so I'm going to take her to the Hokage's Office where she will be safe." Naruto said as he took the lab coat off Anko before picking her up bridal style again. "If I'm right about the black spots it should clear my name so I won't have to be here any way."

"Be careful." Aikyo said as he left her to call the Chief and get a message to the Hyuga head.

Naruto ran threw the Hospital receiving glares from everyone as he passed. When he got out of the large building he was meet by Kakashi who was about to enter.

"Naruto-kun why is there a rumor going around the village that you poisoned two of your patients with your special chakra?" Kakashi asked as he watched the passing villagers glare at the young blonde.

"Someone is trying to frame me by poisoning the two men with a poison that went into their chakra network and caused the same symptoms as chakra poisoning that is usually caused by fighting a tailed beast for an extended period of time." Naruto answered as he started running towards the Hokage's Office Kakashi right on his tail.

"How is that possible?" Anko asked causing both men to look at her.

"The only possible way to cause the symptoms would to have a tailed beast with you in order to take some of their chakra and replicate it into a liquid form." Naruto began to answer as he put it together in his head. "Another Jinchuriki would be able to do it but I don't understand what reason they would have to frame me. I don't even know those mens names so killing them wouldn't really affect me unless they were trying to tarnish my name."

"Maybe they wanted to give the village another reason to hate you." Kakashi stated.

"Why would they do that? I thought most Jinchuriki's are hated by their villages so why would they want to make the village hate Naruto-kun even more then it already does?" Anko asked.

"Maybe they were jealous." Naruto said causing the two shinobi to stare at him with curiosity. "Even though the village still hates me, my life is better then most Jinchuriki. The Hokage is basically my grandfather, one of the strongest Shinobi in the village is one of my closest friends, I have two great friends in the owner of Ichiraku Ramen Bar and his daughter, and I'm currently holding a beautiful women." Anko blushed furiously as she tried to hide her face in Naruto's chest. Kakashi chuckled as he watched the Snake Mistress of Konoha, one of the most sadistic women in the world blush like a school girl.

"Did you change her attitude while you were healing her?" Kakashi asked with a chuckle but he was stopped when a kunai whizzed by his balls. "Never mind." The three shinobi finally arrived at the large building, they found that the window was still open so filling there feet with chakra they ran up the wall and jumped threw the window landing in the Hokage's Office. Naruto placed Anko on the small couch before turning back to the Old-Man.

"Have you heard what happened?" Naruto asked the Sandaime. Getting a quick nod he continued. "I already found that they were both injected with a poison that replicated the affects of chakra poisoning."

"So someone was trying to frame you." The Sandaime concluded. "They had to of known that you would figure that out so why go threw all the trouble of framing you?"

"Tarnish my name before I could make one for myself. They were probable the one that started the rumor that I poisoned my patients with the Kyubi's chakra. And even if we do tell everyone that I was framed, I will still have trouble finding patients that will be willing to let me treat them."

"They succeeded in that." Everyone turned to an ANBU that had just appeared from a seemingly no where. "The villagers have already started to call you the Cursed Medic and most are calling for your head."

"And what do you think ANBU-san?" Naruto asked. 'The villagers hate I can live with. Its the shinobi that I need to have trust me or all of my work will be useless.'

"At first I felt the same." The ANBU answered truth fully. He knew that even if he didn't answer the Hokage would of forced so he just figured he would save some time. "But after hearing what you just said, I wont stop you from healing me if I need it...but I have to say that the nickname could actually help you."

"And how exactly would the Cursed Medic help me?" Naruto asked skeptically.

"Even though most of the villagers fear you now. After you prove yourself on the field you will gain the respect of your pears and the fear of your enemies." The ANBU explained. "Its just like Konoha's Copy-nin and 'The Professor'. Names that both bring hope and fear."

Naruto nodded a few times but the name still brought a bitter taste to his mouth. He didn't want to be a symbol of fear, even if it was against the enemies of Konoha. Medics were supposed to bring hope and light, not fear and death.

"If the villagers are really calling for his head then I will most likely be called by the Council soon. I will need you two," The Sandaime said nodding to Kakashi and the ANBU. "to make sure mobs don't form. Naruto I will need you to stay here for the night, you know where the cots are." Kakashi and the ANBU nodded before they both Shunshined to do their jobs.

"I will keep Anko-chan here with me." Naruto looked over to the girl who had already fallen asleep do to exhaustion. 'She stayed awake longer then I thought she would.' Naruto thought to himself. "I can't leave her at the hospital because the person who poisoned the first two might try and poison her to."

The Sandaime nodded in agreement before he stood and moved to the door. "Get a good nights sleep, you still have to go to the academy tomorrow." He left the room with a smile on his face as he listened to Naruto yell out a string of curses.

DONE.

Well that's over for now.

Peace out.