Poke.

"Mmm…"

Poke.

"Mmmmh."

Poke.

"Nya…. Hmmmnm."

Poke.

"Nahhh… five more…"

Poke.

"OH FOR THE LOVE OF GOD~!"

"Finally! Do you know how hard it is to wake you up? I should have just started jumping on you to speed up the process. Now, get off your lazy ass and get dressed! Don't you remember? You have an new mission, and-" Here I cut the screeching maniac off.

"Shut up, Caitlin! It's bad enough you get me up at this ungodly hour! It's-" I checked the digital clock on my bedside table- "6 am? Wait, there's a 6 AM?" I asked in disbelief. Caitlin, my friend, roomie and co-worker, rolled her eyes. "Yeah, there is, you lazy pig." She answered, with all the kindness and love in her heart. "Now get up, Anna! You need to get there early." Oh, wait. Let's pause here, you're probably confused.

You see, the reason why I'm being forced- ah, coaxed- out of my lovely, warm bed at six in the morning is because of my job. I'm what you'd call a Mary Sue Slayer. Mary Sues, commonly known as Sues, are terrible creatures that roam the lands of Fanfiction.

They force the canon characters from any and all books and movies into OOC situations, disgust readers with visions of perfect, long, curly, shining ebony hair, big, round, sparkling eyes blue as the endless sky at twilight, and pale, porcelain skin soft as silk and flawless as a diamond, and reduce any character within 5 miles to puddles of warm goo.

The Mary-Sue Slayers organization was started by a fanfiction authoress known only as XxScarletteDravenxX nearly 10 years ago. She was pissed about these terrible creatures ruining most fics with OC's in them. So she gathered a few fellow haters, and the number of the group grew and grew.

She used her authoress powers to write her comrades into those stories, and they protected the main characters from the Sues. My name is Anna-Lee Mariway, and I joined 3 years ago. I've have moved up to the rank of a brigadier general since then.

I love bragging about the fact that I have never been defeated yet. Most of my sucsess was due to pure luck, but really, who needs to know that?

Anyway, my newest mission was in a fandom called 'Fullmetal Alchemist'. It was apparently a very popular anime, and the amount of Sues there have been steadily increasing. I love my job, I really do, and I was exited to be going on another mission. But really, 6 am?

"ANNA-"

"I'M GOING, YOU MANIAC!"

It was almost an hour later when I arrived at HQ with a steaming cup of coffee in my hand. Caffeine can solve anything, that was my motto. Everything passed smoothly. I was equipped with my weapons and extensive knowledge of Edward and Alphonse Elric, and was ready to go 10 minutes later.

I'll never get used to this feeling, I thought as I was wrote in. The familiar sweeping sensation, the feeling of falling, the spike of my adrenaline, and the brief spark of electricity came in an instant, and with a gust of wind, I faded away from the world.

The next thing I saw was pure, blinding white. There was nothing there, except a gate. It had a gothic design, and was at least 5 times taller than I. My heart skipped a beat at the feeling it gave off. An echoing voice suddenly interrupted the silence. "Why, what are you doing here?" It sang. "You're not an al-che-mist. How did you get here, then, hmm?" I blinked. The gate slowly started opening with a rumble.

I took a step to it, and the voice came agian. I realized it as that of the Truth. "What? You have to pay the fine to pass! How-" I couldn't help but smile. "It's a plothole. A convenient one, at that." With those words, I passed through into the other world, and into my next adventure.

-sυє slαуєя-

Yes, it's passing too fast, but it's the first chapter. Ah well, tell me whatcha think in a review! Pretty please!

(Or Mustang will burn you to a crisp. -_-)