A/n: Rewritten, like a tiny itty bitty bit, implied Will/JJ, Reid dies, notes on self harm, and suicide. Emily's pov.

x-x-x

I look around the room that I shared with you for years and years. I'm sick of being here where you use to be. Everything reminds me of you. I can barely breathe in my own house. You had, hell you have all of me.

x-x-x

I stand next to you in front of the casket holding you up as you cry. I can't understand the relationship between you and Will but that means nothing. I will always be there for you and if it means sitting here holding you up as they lower Reid into the ground then that's where I'll be. You finally turn to me and I use the back of my sleeve to whip away all the tears. You give me a weak smile then hug me close, I hug you back and hope its enough because I really don't know what else to do. Slowly we walk back toward the car, you try to look back but I stop you, it's not something you should linger on.

x-x-x

I wake up to you screaming, I quickly pull you close to me waking you up. Tears immediately start to fall, and you stammer out something about me dying. I hold you and tell you over and over that I'm right here. You're so scared that you're shaking. I hold you closer and kiss your neck. You finally start to calm down and relax a little. Slowly you fall back into a pleasant sleep, leaving me wide-awake, again.

x-x-x

I keep telling myself that you're gone, not going to come back. I keep seeing you, memories come back to me. I began to realize that I was nothing but a fling to you, you would always go back to Will and I would be nothing more than a memory. I gave you everything, you were my everything. Nothing can help me, I have to see you with him every day, ripping old wounds right back open, I pray to bleed death sooner rather than later. The child that runs around by you looks just like him it sickens me. You talk to me just like you use to even with both of them around, I see how much you still love me but you wont ever come back to me. I cried when you left, I still cry every day but you'll never know. I look down at the photo of us just weeks before you left, we were so happy, then the blood drops on to it ruining it forever if not for the glass protection. You wont cry at my funeral, you might not even go, you wont cry because I was all alone from the minute I let you in my house to the minute I left it, and I left it by my own blade.