Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, Stephenie Meyer does.

A/N: Again, thank you so much for all the reviews :) Especially jojobear33, your review made my day, thanks ^.^

Song for chapter: Wondering by Good Charlotte. I think it goes really good with this chapter.

Chapter Five: Wondering

EPOV

"Edward...," she whispered. "What's wrong?"

What's wrong? She's asking me what's wrong? Everything is.

I couldn't comprehend how anyone could do that to someone so small and just so fragile. She didn't deserve that kind of pain and I wanted to hunt down and kill the motherfucker that inflicted this pain I was seeing not only on her body but in her eyes. I had this uncomrehendable urge to protect this girl standing infront of me, and I couldn't for the life of me understand why.

"Edward," she repeated. "Please talk to me."

I couldn't look at her, it pained me to see those bruises and those scars that were covering almost every inch of her body. Seeing her in that towel at first really...well it affected me greatly. I couldn't help the way my body reacted to Bella, she was a beautiful girl no matter how many scars covered her body, that was undeniable.

I was trying to avoid her at first only because I was shocked, I didn't know what to say to her if I did talk to her. And I was just too... angry to be anywhere near, I needed time to digest seeing her the way she was. I knew that I would completely lose it in front of her and that was the last thing I wanted to do. God knows what comes out of my mouth when I'm angry or nervous about something. Esme always told me it was sweet whereas Alice, Jazz, Em and Rose always laughed at me about.

I was brought out of my reverie by Bella pulling out of my arms. No, I didn't want her to do that. What was she doing?

Then I realised I had never answered her.

"Seriously," she said stepping out of my arms and walking towards the banisters. "Did I do something?" she continued with her back to me.

"I mean please if I did tell me, I'll fix it. But if the way you're acting around me now is because... is because you regret picking me up off that curb last night, well then I'm sorry but then you shouldn't have done that. I still can't understand why you did." she said in confusion.

She wasn't seriously thinking that, was she?

"Bella," I let out a breath I didn't realise I was holding. "How could you ever think that? I would never regret bringing you home last night."

Bella turned slowly but kept looking at the ground.

I laughed humorlessly, "Hell, that was probably the first right thing I've done in a really long time."

Bella seemed to be frozen, she was still staring at the ground no emotion on her face.

"Bella," I said trying to get her attention, nothing. Did I say something wrong, maybe I was too forward, I was wasn't I? Shit.

"Bella." I repeated louder.

It was still raining heavely, her hair was matted and pressing against her neck and shoulders. Oh my God and all that's holy her clothes... I gulped. Her V neck sweater was soaked through and was sticking to her body, it was becoming see through and God, she was going to be the death of me. I shifted uncomfortably.

Think, think Edward, you scared the poor girl.

"Bella come on you're scaring me."

Then she looked up abruptly, as if breaking from a deep, deep thought. Her deep set brown eyes looked into mine, she scared me. I didn't like the look in her eyes, they weren't the warm chocolate pools that they had been at first. The hurt and pain was still there but I never, not once, expected that they would ever leave her. But it wasn't just that, they were cold and emotionless, she was drawing back from me that much was obvious.

Edward you complete dumb fuck. What did I do? I fucked up everything.

Bella looked me straight in the eye and said, "Edward, I'm sorry for taking up so much of your time." What? What was she talking about, this isn't making any sense.

"I promise I'll get out of your way." she continued her voice cold and empty.

When I just continued to stare at her she lifted her head confidently and tried to walk past me to go inside. Looking at her then she looked to be at her strongest, the strongest I've seen her since last night. But who was I kidding? What was I playing at? Clearly I don't know Bella because this a side to her that I hadn't seen until now. I knew nothing about her. I don't know how I convinced myself to think I did.

But I couldn't. I couldn't let her leave, not like this, not with that cold comment. I could fix it, I could try to change what I said, seeing as it clearly upset her. What did I say wrong though?

"Bella no." I said as I grabbed her around her waist as she was about to walk by me, she stiffened immediately. The fact that I caused her to clench up in fear hurt more than it should.

"Bella I want to help you." I pleaded.

She looked up at me and glared.

"I don't need your help, I'm doing fine on my own." she said strongly, not once did her voice falter but we both new the second she uttered those words that they were a lie.

"That's not true Bella and you know it." I said frustrated with her now.

"Who the hell are you and what makes you think that I can't take of myself? I've been doing fine on my own for longer than you can imagine. You don't even know me, so don't you dare act like you do." she sneered.

I sighed, she was right I didn't know her but she won't even let me know her.

"I don't know you Bella, but I really do only want to h-" she cut me off angerly.

"I said you don't fucking know me." I stared at her in shock, Bella hadn't once cussed. She just wasn't a girl that should cuss, she was too inocent for that, too pure.

"Do not cuss." I said just as angry and she stared at me aghast.

"Now you're telling me what the fuck to do? Seriously Edward, you're just fucking pathetic, happy? I say whatever the fuck I want to say." she said shoving my chest after every 'fuck'.

"I said don't cuss Bella."

"Ugh," she screamed. "You are so infuriating." I tried to hold in my laugh, but I was finding it very hard. She was simply too adorable for her own good, she looked like an angry kitten.

"Yeah, smirk you asshole." she muttered again trying to walk by me, but I held her back again.

"You kiss your mother with a mouth like that Bella?" I asked teasingly.

Although, I was not expecting her reaction. Before I knew what was happening, Bella's hand flew back and she slapped me. Bella slapped me.

"What the fuck Bella?" I said angerly staring at her in shock.

"Don't you dare mention my mother." she huffed breathing heavily and glaring at me

"God, Bella will you just stop and listen to me for two seconds? I don't know how this conversation got to here, all I was trying to tell you from the beginning was that you could trust me. That's it." I told her, I was really starting to get impatient with her now.

She continued to glare at me, "I do not trust you and I have no reason to."

Now I was the one glaring at her, "You don't trust me Bella and you don't have a reason to? Is this a joke? That is absolutely pathetic, I can't believe you, how can you even say that?"

"I'm pathetic now? You kn-" I cut her off before she could continue.

"Bella I never said you were pathetic, I was refering to what you said."

"I don't even know why I'm bothering with this. Look Edward seeing as I'm going to be here for a while I'll stay out of your way and you stay out of mine. That way maybe we can atleast act normal in front of everyone."

I couldn't believe this, I was losing her before I even really had her, and she didn't trust me? That still hurt so much. Growing up, Esme always told me that everybody needed somebody to trust, or else one of these days they won't be able to handle being on their own any longer and they would eventually combust. Is that what would happen to Bella?

No, I won't let it. I'll be there, she will eventually trust me.

"Bella be reasonable." I said almost pleading, I never thought I would plead with any girl but then again there were a lot of things I thought I wouldn't do before Bella.

"Great," she mumbled to herself. "Now the dousche is calling me unreasonable."

"Bella, I didn't-"

"No Edward," she said sternly. "Lets stick to what I said, you stay out of my way and I out of yours, I know this is your home Edward and I will always be grateful that you brought me here but I can see that we just don't get along." she finished and walked by me and pushed the glass doors open as she stepped in I saw Esme run up to her fussing and waving her arms, I'm sure about Bella's wet condition.

I sighed, walked up to the banisters, I lay my elbows and bent my head into my hands, I ran my hands through my hair in frustration.

Well, that went well. Now I'll be living with Bella and not be able to actually talk to her and get to know her, like I wanted to... still do.

She won't be able to keep that strong front on for too long, one of these days Bella isn't going to be able to handle what she's going through (whatever that is) and she is going to come to me and I'll only be so glad to help her. She's going to snap eventually, but I didn't want her to have to go through all that pain until she realises she does need someone. That's exactly why I was arguing with her.

"Damn it Bella." I muttered to myself.

"Talkin' to yourself? Now that can't be good. Infact they say it's the first sign of insanity." Jasper said, coming up to stand beside me his eyebrows raised and a smirk on his face.

"Ugh, no... I mean yeah. Shit, I don't know. I thought the first sign of insanity is talking to yourself and then answering yourself?" I asked trying to avoid him asking what I knew he was going to ask.

"Same thing applies dude."

"Right," I said looking out into the forest. "Then I guess I am insane and if not then I'm not far from it."

"So..." Jasper said looking at me promptly.

"So what?" I asked feigning ignorance.

"Dude, seriously just spit out." he said annoyed now. "We're not fucking girls, so just talk already... or should I go get ice cream." he teased

Typical Jasper behaviour, no beating around the bush just straight to the point and teasing.

I huffed, not knowing how to tell him this.

"Well, start by explainin' why you were sayin' 'damn it Bella' when I came out here." Jasper said as if reading my mind.

"Well, I don't know she just... she's so... so infuriating. I mean I want to help that's all and she can't accept that, and I get that we don't know eachother and I might of been a bit forward, but that doesn't mean she can just get pissed and then start fucking cussing at me right and left, then going as far as fucking slapping me. Jasper, Bella slapped me. Can you believe that?" I was ranting and I knew that but I also knew that I was going to fucking explode if I didn't say anything to anyone. I was still finding it hard to believe.

I looked over at Jasper to see him fighting a laugh, just perfect.

"Man, don't laugh. I'm fucking serious." I growled.

"Alright, alright well... whatcha' do to make 'er slap you Eddie?" he asked and I tried to let the dumb nickname slide for now, only because I had more important things on my mind.

"Shit, all I did was ask her if she kissed her mother with a filthy mouth like that, and dude this girl can cuss like no other." I said shaking my head and remembering the sting on my left cheek from where she slapped me.

"Lello ladies!" Emmett shouted as he walk- I mean stumbled over to us. "Anynony lilling tttoo get der drrrink on?" OK, he is too drunk. What the hell did he just say?

I was quite concerned whereas Jasper found this hilarious. I looked at Jasper an eyebrow raised in question.

"I think he wants to know if we want to get our drink on?" Jasper said chuckling.

"God, Emmett you need to put that bottle away, I think you've had enough." I said walking towards him and trying to grab the bottle from his hand.

"Ooooh, loook it's schnowing." Emmett said while twirling and looking up at the sky.

"Man, it's rain not snow." I said.

"Duhhh, buuttt ya can't really saayy it'sss schraining. Ha, ha it'sss schraining... I- I like zaaat." he slurred then broke into a song "It'sss schraaaining man...". Ugh, I seriously do not want to put up with a drunk Emmett, especially right now. Jasper seeming to have read my thoughts as he said, "Go inside, I'll deal with Demmitt here."

"Demmitt?" I asked, eyebrows raised.

"Drunk Emmett." he replied shrugging.

"Ah, I see. Alright, thanks man."

As I opened the glass doors and stepped into the warmth of the house, I started searching. I caught Esme and Carlisle dancing in the far corner of the room, Alice was chatting with Rosalie and I couldn't see Bella anywhere.

That's good, isn't it? Then maybe if she's on her own she would be willing to talk about... about how we were right now. She didn't really expect me to stay away from her, she couldn't. Apart from us living in the same house and going to the same school, well... tomorrow is Christmas. Maybe that will loosen her up a bit.

I was just about to step out of the sitting room when Esme stopped me, her arms waving about and she looked like she was trying to somehow wrap her arms around me.

"Gosh honey, you're soaked. What were you doing standing out in the rain for so long, poor Bella came in looking like a drowned cat."

"Yeah, I know uhmm, I'm going to change right now." I said, heading upstairs.

"Ok, go on honey." she said looking at me with worry in her eyes. I smiled at her reasuringly, when that didn't seem to help I walked up to her, kneeled down to her level and kissed her forehead.

"Don't worry mom, I'll be fine. I'm just a little wet."

She seemed to believe me, but as I walked away I heard her mutter something like 'I really hope he doesn't catch a cold...'

I smiled to myself and shook my head slowly, my mother worried too much, but that alone made me love her even more. She was the best mother any guy could ask for. Carlisle and Esme loved Emmett and I like no other, even though Emmett was adopted they never treated either of us differently.

As I reached the hallway upstairs I walked down to my room; the last one on the right. I had just reached out to open my door when I heard sniffling coming from the room across from mine. Bella's room.

I hesitated before walking towards the door, do I go in?

Did I make her cry?

...we just don't get along.

Bella's words from earlier rang through my head. I sighed, my hand on the doorknob. I took a deep breath and knocked.

I heard her sniffling stop followed by some shuffling and then her small feet padding across the carpet to the door. I held my breath as she opened it.

There stood Bella in pajamas, she looked tired. Completely and utterly worn out, her eyes were bloodshot and the skin under her eyes a bit blotchy. It pained me to see her like this, and to think that I may be the cause of those tears. I was such an asshole.

"Bella..." I whispered, my voice sounded strangled even to my own ears.

"What do you want Edward?" she said her voice sounding defeated. God, I want to help you Bella. I'll beg if I have to but please just talk to me. That's what I wanted to say to her, but I was too chicken shit to say anything, afraid she might get pissed and just shut the door.

"A-are you ok?" I asked. So fucking stupid, clearly she's not ok. I just didn't know what to say to her.

As I said this though, more tears build in her eyes and were about to spill over.

"No, no Bella. Please, don't cry. I'm sorry, I'm so fucking sorry." I told her desperately. I didn't want to make her cry even more, it... it pained me to see her cry.

"Now who's cussing?" she said jokingly, trying to change the subject quite obviously.

"I guess you're right," I chuckled. "I really am sorry Bella."

"No, it's not you're fault Edward, I was a bitch and what I said was completely uncalled for. It wasn't my place to demand anything of you, after everything you have done for me. So, I'm sorry." she said while staring at the floor.

I was staring at her, mouth wide open. She was apologising? Bella was apologising to me after what I was like to her? I was just about to tell her she did nothing wrong and that I shouldn't have pushed her, but she started speaking again.

"Oh, and sorry I guess for slapping you."

"Yeah," I laughed. "That hurt."

She looked up at me sheepishly, but I smiled at her assuring her that I was over it.

"Well, you should just not talk about my mother," she said. "That way, I won't be slapping you anytime soon."

"Sure, but then again, I don't think I would mind if you slapped me again seeing as when you did it I got a very nice view of your ti-" she cut me off before I could continue her eyes wide with shock.

"Do not even finish that sentence Cullen." she said narrowing her eyes at me, but she couldn't hide the shock that was still evident in her eyes. Then again I was quite shocked too, I don't know where that came from. That just wasn't me, Carlisle and Esme raised me to be a gentleman and treat all girls with respect. Suddenly, Bella comes along and I'm beginning to say exactly what comes to my mind. Here I was about to tell her about how I enjoyed her slapping me, only because it gave me a good view of her tits? Oh, God.

I threw my head back and laughed.

"God, you are strange..." Bella muttered under her breath, I chose to ignore that.

"Ok," Bella continued. "Time for mister smiles to leave."

"Mister smiles?" I asked, unable to hide the amusement from my voice.

"Yeah, you're always smiling. Sometimes, I don't even think you realise it." she said matter of factly.

"Well," I said, my voice coming out husky. "That just means that I'm thinking about you baby." I continued leaning towards her. I was teasing but it was the truth, I was thinking about her. Is it me or did her breathing just hitch?

"Edward!" she exclaimed, and I couldn't help but tease her some more, she just made it too easy,

"Say my name baby." I said wiggling my eyebrows at her suggestively.

"Oh, my, God," she muttered rubbing her face with one hand. "You are crazy, now leave. I'm tired and want to sleep."

I laughed but turned my back to walk to my room, when I stepped into my room I stopped and called Bella.

"What?" she said exasperatedly.

"I'm crazy about you honey, oh and dream sweet dreams and may I starr in them all." I laughed at the expression on her face, turned and shut my door.

I was leaning against the door when I realised something.

"Fuck." I muttered to myself. This girl was changing me and I wasn't even realising it. Atleast she wasn't crying anymore though, right?

Ok, sorry about the tiny delay, I was quite busy, there was a wedding and stuffs :)

Anyway, I love to know what you guys think so let me know. You're favourite parts, worst parts and so on...

I know Bella seems a bit more daring but that will be explained when it's her pov.

Thanks for reading :)