Authors note: Well since my last story have gotten quite a few reviews I decided to try out another one. If you read it thank you! And if you review I love you. Please be gentle.

XX

"Action!" came the shrill cry, rising above the hustle and bustle of people going about their designated jobs. The owner of the voice, was crouched low behind his camera, willing his vision to come to life. It was the sixth attempt by the balding man to shoot this scene, and so far it's successful completion was evading him.

"How could you say that to me? I am your wife, the mother of your children! And I have not ..nor could I ever be unfaithful to you. I love you. I've always love you."

"Cuuut! No Rachel! No, no no! You gotta give me something to work with here, that was amateur at best!" he practically screeched, his bloodshot eyes glaring harshly at her from above his thick-framed glasses, which rested halfway down his squashy nose.

"I know Alan, I'm sorry, really. I guess I'm just feeling a little worn out.

Or a lot worn out.

"Look honey, I know this has been tough on you" said the middle-aged man in what he assumed to be a fatherly tone, while casually slinging a beefy arm over her tiny shoulders, "but nobody watching that scene is going to deem it worthy of an Oscar" he glanced at her knowingly. Everybody knew Rachel would dearly love to win an Oscar, it was part of her plan.

Damn him, he's right. His tone however is not appreciated. Asshole.

He continued talking, blithely unaware that the lithe brunette was seriously considering investing in a voodoo doll with his face on it.

"I mean sweetheart, it's as if your reading something from the back of a cereal box rather than declaring your undying love and devotion for your husband" he criticized lightly.

I don't even eat cereal.

"Your problem is that your not ..passionate enough. You need that fire, that spark. As though your world might just end if you don't reach out and touch him right there in that instant. I know you have it in you." He smiled condescendingly, patting her on the head before resuming his original position behind the camera with an expectant gleam in his eye.

Yeah? Well you will have it in you too when I shove my foot up your ...

The brunette quelled her anger and sighed. She just wanted to get the hell out of here. Out of this studio, out of this city. Out of this life.

The short woman allowed her eyes to drift shut and immediately tuned out the surrounding din that constantly accompanied her wherever she went. She tried to remember what love felt like. Did it even exist? She used to think so, but life had worn her down. And her knight in shinning armour, had always turned out to be nothing more than an idiot in tinfoil.

She delved inside herself, probing those tightly repressed memories that had once been so close to her heart. The only memories that brought her any form of comfort or happiness these days. She would regret this later, but right now she had a job to do. People expected her to be professional, to show up, do her job and not to complain. She had built a career on it. When she had started off on Broadway, she was convinced that nothing could stop her, and she was right, she garnered fame, money and every award that could be won. Once at the top she thought she would feel accomplished, happy, but the path she had chosen had little room for anyone else and she felt more alone and isolated than she ever had. Singing didn't make her happy anymore, and so she left. Taking a year off and travelling the world trying to rediscover who Rachel Berry was. When she returned, she had an empty house and a stack of messages, one by one she had gone through her mail sorting them into two piles. Friends and work.

The friends pile was small. What she had found however was a letter from a former business associate who wanted her to make the leap from Broadway to the big screen, at first she refused, but then the bills began mounting up and she realized she needed something to keep her from fading from the public eye. So she took up her first role and loved it. Acting gave her a chance to completely change who she was, take on a whole other persona, reinvent herself. It helped with the pain and loneliness that clouded her now. And she was good at it, as her first movie began receiving worldwide praise and attention, the offers began flooding in and so here she was on the set of her eight consecutive film, trying to feel something she wasn't sure even existed.

Completely ignoring her burly co-stars painfully transparent attempt at flirting, she allowed her mind free reign. Free to rewind the last ten years. She had just turned sixteen, happy for the first time in a long time because she had joined Glee Club. She wasn't accepted exactly, merely tolerated, but to someone whose daily routine consisted of a trip to the dumpster and a slushie facial, it was a definite improvement. She had been the star and everything was falling into place. Ignoring the pang of longing in her heart, the budding actress pictured her former team mates and whispered their names one by one, a silent mantra in head. Comforting her.

Finn, Puck, Mercedes, Kurt, Brittany, Santana, Tina, Artie ..at this point she felt her brain pause momentarily then stutter back to life, muttering the name of her once enemy. Q-Quinn.

"I'm ready." She announced, strutting to the edge of the set and preparing her dramatic entrance. Something she had perfected since the age of one. The silent mantra now beginning to fuse with the dialogue for her upcoming scene. Their faces flitting briefly in and out of her minds eye. She was Alan open his mouth and say something but she was in the zone and completely focused on her task.

Finn, Puck, Mercedes, Kurt.

The former singer burst throw the stage door with angry tears clouding her vision.

"How could you say that to me? I am your wife, the mother of your children!"

She sensed the directors approval and felt a familiar rush of exhilaration.

Brittany, Santana, Tina, Artie.

It felt like a game of Russian roulette within her mind, each empty chamber opening to reveal another forgotten face.

"And I have not ..nor could I ever be unfaithful to you!"

Q-Quinn.

This time the chamber wasn't empty and she felt the lead pierce her skin.

"I love you. I've always loved you."

"Aaand cut!" beamed the broad-bellied director. "Excellent! Now that is what I'm talking about! I don't know where that came from Ms Berry, but I strongly suggest that you keep it going."

The brunette smiled graciously, wiping the tears from her cheeks with the corner of her sleeve and trying hard not to linger on the final snapshot in her head, confused at how the streams of thought had melded together. She then reminded herself of her resolution not to over think things and snapped back to reality. Well to some sort of reality at least.

"And that is a wrap, you are all free to get drunk, congratulations!" announced Alan happily. "Safe journey."

I suppose I can let the voodoo doll slide for now.

The young actress didn't need to be told twice. While the rest of the cast and crew seemed content to loiter around chatting easily amongst themselves, the star knew she would much rather be at home enjoying some precious downtime. This notion was confirmed when she narrowly avoided her co-stars attempt at conversation with her as she fled the studio.

Hurrying to her small trailer, the brunette quickly grabbed her things and rushed to her car. Pressing a button on her keys causing the blue lights of the BMW nearby to flash, dazzling her momentarily, and got in. She groaned at the relief her feet felt as she relaxed into the leather seat. Quickly adjusting her seatbelt, she pulled out of her parking lot. Heading for home.

Ten minutes later, the small brunette made a sharp right turn and wend her way up the steep sloping pathway towards her three story haven. Pressing another button, the garage door slid open and she eased the car inside. The only spot taken up in the four car garage.

Shutting the door carefully behind her, she entered the warm body of her home and kicked off her shoes, flopping exhaustedly onto her huge squashy couch and began gently massaging her aching feet. The brunette remained like that for a few minutes , breathing in the rich smell of the various perfumed candles dotting the house.

Feeling abruptly bored, she lunged ungracefully for the remote and flicked lazily through her five hundred plus channels. Nothing could hold her attention for too long however, and she found herself drifting to sleep right there on the ridiculously comfortable couch.

Knowing she would regret it tomorrow, she dragged her unwilling body off the couch and checked all the doors and windows were securely locked. An annoying necessity which came with living alone. Grabbing a bottle of water from the fridge, she tugged her lagging feet up the stairs and into bed. As a final act, she clapped her hands together once and the lights went out. The sound activated lights had quickly become a routine, the novelty wearing off as fast as the thrill.

It was in her bed that night, sleep attempting to lull her under, that her heart began the familiar ache. She knew it would come, welcomed it even, because it meant that she felt something. The names swirling through her brain, a vicious whirlpool, invading her every thought. Always stuttering on Q-Quinn. The ex-cheerleader, difficult even in memory.

She fell asleep clutching her favourite pillow tightly against her, trying to pretend the object was hugging her back.

She awoke in the same position as the night before, yawning widely, somehow still exhausted. However she knew once awake, she could never quite manage to fall back to sleep and so the brunette rolled out of bed and padded downstairs. The pillow lay abandoned on the cold side of the bed.

She swept down the staircase and headed straight for the kitchen, immediately preparing herself a cup of coffee to help with the drowsiness she still felt. As she allowed the coffee to cool slightly, a red blinking caught her eye and she pressed the button on her answering machine, expecting a call from her PA. Sure enough it was.

"Um hi Rachel. It's Emily."

The brunette rolled her eyes. Emily knew she was the only one to call her everyday, without fail. She appreciated the attempt though.

"I've just been contacted about a new movie deal. It's meant to be pretty big news. The director owes you a favour, apparently you helped him out one time with tickets to some Broadway shows, and there is a lot of hype surrounding this movie, specifically Oscar type hype. And the movie hasn't even started production yet."

The brown eyed girl shifted her weight, tilting her ear towards the machine as though it would help her hear more clearly. Her interest was pique.

"Well anyway, I got the producer to send me the script, which I have in my hands at this very moment. I'm making condensed notes and then I'll drop them by later today. So expect me around three. I'll speak to you later. And ..congratulations on your latest wrap."

The machine beeped and the brunette smiled, Emily was good at her job. She would have to be, in order to keep up with Rachel's sometimes ridiculous demands, apparently the pretty red-head enjoyed a challenge. Or so she said. Rachel had the sneaking suspicion that her once arch-enemy now turned best friend Jessie St. James might of had something to do with it. He worried about her, maybe this girl was his way of keeping tabs.

Yeah that or my charming personality.

The actress snorted at how idiotic that sounded even to her, and glanced at the clock. Two o clock. She slept in way later than usual, though it wasn't surprising considering the amount of work she put into everything she did. It was just the way she was programmed. Deciding to end the brief self analysis that had just occured, the brunette made her way upstairs to take a shower and get dressed.

An hour later, the freshly made up woman entered the kitchen and put on another pot of coffee, just as the doorbell rang. The brunette shuffled waited a moment, and only moved once she heard the bell sound again, she didn't want Emily to think she had just been waiting for her to arrive or anything. She opened the door with a scowl and eyed the bubbly redhead.

"Oh it's you." She muttered before walking back inside and leaving the door open.

Emily knew not to take whatever Rachel said personally, and the star heard the door click shut as her PA'S heels clicked loudly against the marble tiles, following her into the kitchen and taking a seat at the breakfast bar.

"Yes it's me." Chirped the enthusiatic woman "Now I have the notes all made out and I've already made a no comment to every magazine that contacted me just in case you don't want to do it."

The brunette took the notes and quickly scanned the first page, she felt her eyebrows raise as she read.

"Do you have any questions?"

"I'm a lesbian?"

"Well It's good you finally came out of that closet then." Smirked the redhead deliberately misinterpreting the question.

"Oh ha ha. Very funny, I meant in the movie"

The PA giggled slightly at the lock on the brunette's face and then regained her composure as she remembered what her job was.

"That is correct. In this movie you will play a teacher who falls in love with one of her female students." She confirmed seriously, before asking "is that Ok?"

"Sure. I mean, it's fine whatever it's just a job right?"

"Yeah just a job" echoed the younger girl dutifully "so do you have any further questions, because I should really be getting back to the office?" questioned the redhead, already gathering her things and walking towards the door.

"Oh. Well um has anybody I know been cast yet? What about the student I'm meant to fall for?" snorted the brunette, accompanying the girl to the door.

"Yes well that part has actually just been cast, a relative newcomer I believe, she is meant to have blown them away in the auditions. She actually beat out Dakota Fanning for this one"

The former singer frowned. This girl must be good.

Not as good as me of course.

The star added in her head.

"So I'll be here to pick you up at nine o clock tomorrow morning for your interview with Word magazine. OK?"

The brunette nodded still lost in thought as she watched the redhead getting into her car.

The engine started and the singer suddenly thought of something.

"What's her name? This oh so amazing actress?" she yelled above the noise.

The younger girl thought for a moment before yelling back.

"It's Quinn. Quinn Fabray."