Her blonde hair was plastered to her forehead, a product of the constant drizzle that seemed to accompany life in Seattle. She watched as Derek carefully buckled the car seat into the car. His face was stony. No emotion showed in his features as he attempted to get the car seat fastened properly. She continued to watch as he loaded the two small suitcases into the back of the SUV, his face not swaying from the front of indifference. When he had finally turned to face her, she walked up the stairs, calling loudly into the house, "come on daddy's ready to go."

The sounds of light footsteps echoed through the house before two young boys arrived at the door. She reached down to hug the older boy and then picked up the toddler, pulling him against her in a tight hug.

Derek stepped forward, pulling the toddler from her arms and walking toward his SUV. The older boy followed and crawled into his booster seat as Derek buckled the toddler into his seat. He stepped away from the car and turned to face Meredith.

"So you're going to bring them back next Friday at 6?" Meredith asked.

"Yeah," Derek said pointedly.

"You'll call if you're running late or something?" she questioned.

"Yeah," he replied as he turned away from her slightly.

"I'll just say goodbye one more time," she said motioning toward the car.

She moved forward peering in at the boys.

"I love you Christopher, I'll see you next week," she directed to the older boy, then turned her attention to the toddler, "and I love you too, Jakey."

She shut the door and watched as Derek pulled away toward the house in the woods. When the car had disappeared from sight, the tears finally began to fall.

Christina arrived exactly 15 minutes after Derek had gone, with a bottle of tequila in one hand and a pizza in the other. She set the pizza on the coffee table and fell to the couch next to Meredith. Opening the bottle, she took a swig before silently handing it to Meredith. Meredith accepted it graciously taking a long sip before turning to face Christina.

"So. McAss has the McDemons for 10 days?" Christina started.

"Yeah," Meredith sighed.

"First time since you started this trial separation thingy," Christina noted.

"Yup," Meredith replied, taking another drag of tequila.

"So, how is it going? The separation thingy, I mean?" Christina asked.

"I don't know. He seems to be completely indifferent to the whole thing. I still love him, but something happened between us. There is some kind of a roadblock there," Meredith answered.

"You have no idea what caused it?" Christina asked, picking up a slice of pizza and taking a bite.

"It's been going on for months," Meredith noted.

"Ever since…" Christina trailed off.

"Yeah," Meredith replied, immediately jumping back into the memory.

Meredith knew as soon as she saw Derek that something had happened. She walked up to him, and placed her hand on his back. He jumped under her touch and immediately spun around to face her.

"Hey, what's wrong?" she asked him.

"Uhh…nothing," he said, "at least I think it's nothing…I…I don't know."

He ran his hand through his hair, a sure sign that something was on his mind before turning and walking the opposite direction.

It was later that day that Meredith stumbled across the cause of Derek's discomfort. When she walked into the patient's room, her head was buried in the chart. She noted the name of the little girl, Ainsley Martin, before closing the chart and looking up. When her eyes fell on the little girl she gasped. Her blue eyes were so familiar. She saw those eyes every day. Those eyes stared back at her when she woke to Derek watching her sleep, and they shined bright in the faces of her boys. She stood still, her face frozen in a state of shock as her eyes roamed the girl's features. Her hair fell in dark ringlets down her back and her lips formed a perfect smirk. She didn't even realize how long she had been standing there until Arizona called her name.

"Grey?" she questioned.

"Uhh…I…ah…I need to go," Meredith mumbled before running out the door.

She didn't know she was going there until she had arrived. She paused momentarily to catch her breath and her eyes ran over the words written next to the door: Derek Shepherd M.D. Neurology. She finally composed herself enough to knock and heard a muffled "come in" from inside. She opened the door and walked in before quickly closing it behind her.

"Hey," she said quietly.

"Hey," he replied his tired eyes finding hers.

She moved forward slightly, trying to figure out what she wanted to say.

"So, earlier, something was bothering you," she prompted, deciding she was going to try to get it out of him.

He sat quietly watching her as she absentmindedly toyed with the ring on her finger.

"Did you know I switched with Christina today? I moved to Robbins service," she noted trying again to prompt him to speak.

Derek sat up a little straighter, obviously uncomfortable with the turn the conversation had taken.

"Derek," she said desperate for him to say something, anything.

"You saw her didn't you?" he finally said, his head dropping ever so slightly.

"Yeah," she replied.

"I don't know if she's mine. I know you were thinking it too," he said.

"Could she be…yours I mean?" she asked, moving closer to him.

"After I left New York, there were a couple of one-night stands," he offered, his hand moving up to squeeze the bridge of his nose.

"Before you met me," she added in seeming indifference, but her voice betrayed her fear.

"Of course. I was upset and drunk 90% of the time. They meant nothing, but her last name..." he said before Meredith cut him off.

"Martin," she said, remembering the name on the chart.

"There was this one girl. I can't be sure, the memories foggy, but I think her last name was Martin. And that girl, she looks so much like me," Derek sighed.

"I guess we have some things to figure out," Meredith said closing the distance between them and pulling his hands away from his face.

He looked up at her, more fear in his eyes than she had seen in a while.