(For disclaimer and author/story/series notes, see Part 1.)

0~*~0

Part 3: The Angel

The rest of the party passed more quickly than Sheena would have liked - a fact that surprised her when she finally realized how late it was getting. After a few slow songs, the tempo of the music picked up, and Zelos, upon discovering how limited her knowledge of ballroom dance was, took it upon himself to teach her a few new dances before dinner. He was, unsurprisingly, a natural at it, very graceful after the years of practice he'd had - the complete opposite of her, who could barely eke out a simple waltz before he'd patiently guided her through it. Once she felt comfortable with that one, he briefly showed her a few other less common dances, like the minuet, and the courante, and then some others with some fancy names that Sheena had quickly forgotten. They didn't use most of those dances the rest of the night, but it did whet her appetite to pick up some more dance steps sometime. Besides, she figured, if their relationship continued long enough, maybe she could one day use them again. And really, learning to move her body in new, different ways was a good thing for a ninja. In fact, one day it might even prove useful, depending on the poor sucker she was trying to seduce information out of.

While dancing wasn't her forte, thanks to her klutzy streak that, thankfully, only popped up once or twice during the night, it actually turned out to be fun, thanks to Zelos, who made it fun. Sure, the dances themselves were more formal than even Zelos liked, but it was still fun doing something different with him. She improved her skills simply because he was patient when she made a mistake, just encouraging her to take a breath and try again. Every now and then a hunny would come over, interrupt them, and whine that he was spending too much time with Sheena when he should be 'spreading the love' to all the other women waiting to dance with him, but he always just brushed them off and told him his date had dibs on him tonight, and 'unless she feels like sharing, I'm not leaving her side.'

He always managed to divert his hunnies' attention smoothly, but it was far more awkward when men cut in and asked to dance with her. Zelos would always arch an eyebrow and then stand back and let her tell them, as politely as she could muster, that she wasn't interested, and depending on how persistent the man was, it felt like she was tripping over her own two feet turning them down. Zelos never seemed surprised by those interruptions - he actually seemed rather smug, Sheena had noted, rolling her eyes - but she was certainly surprised so many men showed such interest in her. Every time she expressed that surprise, though, Zelos just laughed and assured her she was generating that kind of attention because she looked incredible - and that, well, plenty of guys besides Matthew were jealous of the female attention he garnered and believed if he was dating someone, then that woman must be worth pursuing. At least Matthew didn't bother them again - and, as Zelos predicted, after half hour, they couldn't even spot him in the crowd anymore.

As awkward as that was, though, it paled in comparison to dinner. The food itself was fancy and delicious, but as Zelos had feared, the trade-off for skipping his dance with Hilda was that they had to sit with the king and the princess for dinner. And having to eat with them...talk about intimidating. Thankfully, Zelos gave her a refresher course beforehand about the manners expected of her (use this fork for salad and this one for the main meal, sit up straight, never finish everything on your plate before the king does, etc.), but having to abide by so many rules took most of the enjoyment out of the meal. The conversation itself was just as stilted. Sheena had never before had to watch every word she said so carefully, and other than whispering to Zelos (who, thankfully, insisted she sit beside him), she basically kept her mouth shut the entire time, because the last thing she wanted to do was accidentally offend anyone. Again, she was grateful that Zelos handled the conversation himself.

But the worst part of the meal came when Hilda had realized who Zelos's date was and why he'd missed his dance with her, and it was at that point that Hilda had begun giving Sheena jealous glares similar to the ones Zelos's hunnies always gave her. Fortunately, those glares were far more restrained than his hunnies' were, and every time Sheena caught her doing it, usually after Zelos had whispered something in her ear that made her laugh, Hilda would blush in embarrassment and look away, probably because she was the princess and knew glaring was unbecoming of someone of her standing. Sheena really didn't want to make enemies with the royal family just because of who she was dating, and really, she was starting to understand why women were so territorial about Zelos anyway, so she refused to hold it against Hilda. As embarrassing as it was to realize, if Zelos wasn't so completely with her tonight, Sheena suspected she'd be acting the same way.

The dinner and its accompanying formality, fakeness, waste, and gaudiness was obnoxious while it lasted, but every now and then Zelos would give her a soft smile or would touch her hand or her knee in a way that said, 'Thank you for putting up with this crap for me,' and somehow those little gestures reminded her why she was there and got her through it. In return, she would smile and squeeze his hand, silently telling him she wasn't going anywhere, no matter how stupid it all was. Yes, she might abhor parts of this party, but it was only one night and she loved him. He was worth it.

And then dinner was finally over, and they'd gone back to the part Sheena really was enjoying: dancing. For the next half hour, Zelos entertained her with amusing stories about the noblemen around them, explaining who they were, how they'd made their fortunes, and all the ridiculous ways he'd seen them trying to make themselves look good. He never really put them down (well, okay, he did for one or two of the really idiotic people, but she wasn't counting them), but it passed the time, entertained her, helped her get a better picture of his 'world' and Meltokio's culture, and gave her pointers on how to handle certain people, what to say to them, and what they really meant when they said something.

By the time he'd finished, Sheena had felt less like an angel out of heaven and more like someone who was capable of seeing things around her for what they really were, not just what they seemed to be. It impressed her how much Zelos had figured out about his fellow noblemen; in fact, it was probably events like this one where he'd learned to not only be so perceptive of people's nuances, but how to manipulate others' reactions to him and hide behind the mask. While she wished he wasn't so good at that, the past couldn't be changed, and Sheena was just glad he'd shared his knowledge and helped her become more comfortable here, especially if he really did want her to accompany him to more of these functions.

Eventually, their conversation faded into silence and time melted into a blur as they continued dancing, keeping to themselves along a far side of the room, just enjoying the closeness, warmth, and love of holding each other. She felt so calm and relaxed in his arms, being able to drown in his scent, feeling his cheek pressed against hers and his breath on her neck, and moving with him to the soft music, enjoying the night. After awhile, no one interrupted them anymore, although every now and then she still heard someone comment about how strange it was to see Zelos staying with one woman all night, or about how beautiful she was, or about how she didn't impress them, but Sheena just didn't care. Zelos loved her, and she loved him, and that was all that truly mattered.

In a way, it was funny how Zelos had now gotten everything he'd 'charged' her at the last party in exchange for his secrets: first the kiss, then the date, and finally the dance. Her debt to him was now paid in full. They had both won this game. Sure, the future was still a sobering, alarming unknown, but the present...who would have known that out of the 'bargain' they'd struck that night, they would both get everything they wanted: love, trust, understanding, acceptance, and respect? And it had all started with a chance meeting on a balcony that ended up being so much more. That night had proven to her that not everything in life turned out as was expected, and that was why she'd kept their relationship going so long, even when logic told her it was hopeless: because in the blink of an eye, everything could still change, for better or worse. Whatever will be, will be.

In time, thanks to the music and Zelos's warmth, Sheena had lulled off into a hypnotic daze, all sense of time lost, when suddenly his lips lifted to her ear. "What do you say we get outta here, sweetheart? I think we've more than put in our appearance by now."

Slowly lifting her head, rousing herself from her daze, Sheena looked up at him, his soft smile making her heart skip a beat, and nodded. "Sure."

They said goodbye to the princess, thanking her and the king for the lovely party and, again, wishing wished her a happy birthday - but Hilda, Sheena noted, really didn't seem happy. It wasn't something she'd ever expected to see - a princess jealous of her - and yet she couldn't deny the envious look in Hilda's eyes at seeing Zelos holding her hand. It felt good, in a way, but it was also unsettling, and Sheena was happy when they finally finished. They then bid farewell to a few other guests, including Regal, who smile and shook his head as if amazed that Zelos really hadn't wandered off on her, and then they were free, stepping outside onto the streets of Meltokio.

The night air was brisk, much colder than when they'd arrived - she should have known since fall in Meltokio meant warm days and cold nights - and the initial shock against her bare skin roused her from the lingering daze she'd slipped into inside the warm hall. She quickly wrapped her stole around herself, shivering.

"Whoops," Zelos suddenly said, then he immediately began unbuttoning his suit coat. "Can't have you freezing out here. Here you go, love."

A second later he draped his coat over her shoulders, and, blushing at the gentlemanly action, Sheena gratefully accepted it, savoring the warmth it still held from his body. "Thanks," she whispered, pulling it tighter around her.

"You're welcome." Freed of his coat, Zelos took the opportunity to loosen his tie and undo the top button of his dress shirt, then he pulled off his gloves, stuffed them in his pockets, and rolled up his sleeves. Sheena watched him work, biting her lip as her heart tightened at his transformation from proper to casual. As much as she loved seeing him dressed up, she loved the laid-back, carefree Zelos just as much. Once he was comfortable, he turned to her, grinning as he looked her over, and then motioned at the pins and clips holding up her hair. "May I...?"

Agh, again with her hair? What was his obsession with seeing her hair down, seriously? But eh, she was feeling generous, so she supposed she could humor him this time. "Fine, fine," she said with a low sigh. "Go ahead."

His eyes lit up, and he reached for her hair, gently pulling out pin after pin, more of her dark hair falling freely around her face with each one he removed. Once finished, he stood back and looked her over, his eyes softening. "Much better."

Sheena blushed and gave him the best glare she could manage while being the recipient of such a soft, adoring look. A moment later, though, an impulse hit her. "Yeah, well, just for that..." With a smirk, she reached around him and untied the violet ribbon holding his braid together, then nodded her approval once she'd finished. "There. Now we're even."

Zelos chuckled and shook his hair free from its braid, then he slid an arm behind her, leading her down the steps and away from the reception hall. "I think I can handle that." Upon reaching the street, they turned east, toward his mansion. He then glanced at her again, a wicked smirk appearing on his lips. "Of course, now you're even sexier than before." Uh oh, his tone was shifting from chivalrous to lecherous, and that could only mean one thing: the pervert was back. She arched a wary eyebrow as he lifted a hand as if to wave down an argument she hadn't even been considering making. "Now, now, I know what you're gonna say: 'But oh Great and Mighty Zelos, there's no way that could be true because I was already way beyond a ten on the sexiness scale before!' Right? It was true, though!" He took a step away and motioned at her, smirking broadly. "I mean, this dress and this incredible, voluptuous figure are bad enough, but now to add this hair to the mix...do you have anyidea how hard it's gonna be for me not to molest you now?"

Sheena folded her arms to her chest and narrowed her eyes as he began whistling innocently, his hand going to her back and trailing downward, so slowly that it was obvious he wasn't serious about it. If he was, after all, he would've just gone straight for his target destination rather than giving her a chance to react. Despite the fact that his hand was currently in a place that, three months ago, would have resulted in a black and blue shiner on his cheek, Sheena couldn't help snorting at his antics. Honestly, she hadn't seen him like this in a long time. And much to her own amazement, not only wasn't she upset about it - the idiot was just feeling playful, and it was hard to be mad at him when he was sincerely happy - but, for once, she wanted to play along with him.

She abruptly stopped walking and turned to him, arching a half-threatening eyebrow. "The Great and Mighty Zelos better quit treating me like a hunny and get his hand off my ass before I kick him to the ground and stomp on his pretty fingers." She poked his chest. "I may be stuck wearing this fancy dress, buddy, but I can still beat you to a bloody pulp."

His hand immediately stopped, as she'd known it would, but the playfulness and eagerness in his eyes flared further as he waggled his eyebrows tauntingly. "Ooh, feisty. I like that. Can you kick my ass? Please? Pretty please? Pretty please with a peach on top?"

She had to bite the inside of her cheek to keep from laughing. "You just want to take all the fun out of it for me, don't you?"

His smirk was downright wicked now. "It might take all the fun out of it for you, but not for me. I'll be enjoying every second of it."

Sheena rolled her eyes and sighed, but her grin was irresistible. "Yeah, I was wondering where you were tonight. You'd been behaving so well, too. I should've known it wouldn't last."

He lifted his hands innocently and gave her a wide-eyed, mock-affronted look. "Hey, just because I know how to be a gentleman doesn't mean I like being a gentleman! And now that I'm not choking in that silly suit and tie anymore, the pervert in me just can't help coming out to play. He's been repressed way too long tonight."

"Aha!" she said, pointing at him triumphantly. "So that's your secret! Strangle you with formality and you'll actually behave! I'll have to remember that for the future." Her grin broadened and she tilted her head thoughtfully as he snorted, his eyes twinkling in the soft overhead lamplight. "Formal clothes, eh? Who would've thought that was the answer? Hm...I think I can handle seeing you decked out like this more often." She motioned at him, unable to resist ogling his lean, muscular, and, yes, sexy body. "I mean, it really does look really good on you."

Zelos sighed and snapped his fingers as if to say, 'Aw, shucks!' "Damn. And here I'd hoped you wouldn't figure that out." Without warning, he beamed her another wicked grin. "Heh. Then I guess I'll just have to fix the problem, won't I? Y'know, by giving in to my primitive, caveman urges and tearing any fancy clothes you try to put me in to shreds. And if you try to stop me...well, let's just say I can't guarantee the safety of your clothes, either."

Sheena tried to bite back her laughter again, not wanting to encourage him, but her resolve lasted all of a second before she succumbed anyway. Oh, great Jizou. This man was so utterly ridiculous at times, with the most bizarre, perverted ideas imaginable, that she still occasionally had trouble believing she was dating him. It was a wonder Regal had believed her earlier certainty about him. If she wasn't completely convinced Zelos was just acting stupid to make her laugh and smile, she'd be smacking the hell out of him.

Instead, she shook her head and muttered, "You are such an idiot."

Chuckling, Zelos placed his hands on her hips and pulled her closer, pressing his lips to her forehead. "Yeah, I know," he whispered. "I try. And you love me anyway."

Sheena sighed in mock reluctance and exasperation, then lifted her face toward his, gave him a soft smile, and whispered, "Yeah, I do."

The playfulness in his eyes instantly softened into such sincere love and admiration that it sent butterflies fluttering in her stomach. "And I love you, too."

Zelos leaned down and gave her a quick but tender kiss that she happily returned, then he pulled back, lifted a hand to her face, and gently brushed her dark hair back, just observing her. And for a moment, Sheena let him, enjoying the comfortable banter and happiness of simply being with him. It was then that she noticed it, though: he was standing directly in front of a flickering lamppost, the light from which was catching on his red hair, setting it alight and making it glow as brightly and as beautifully as a raging fire.

...It looked exactly like his wings.

The recollection sent a vivid image through her mind of the first - and only - time she'd seen them, when he had flown down that hole in the Tower of Salvation and rescued her as she'd fallen. It was a mental picture she'd never forgotten, but she'd never asked him about them, mainly because he'd never mentioned them or shown them to her again since. Just because he didn't talk about them, though, didn't mean he didn't have them...nor did it mean he didn't have the other aspects that came with them. She just didn't know how manyof those aspects had come with them.

Without warning, the memory slipped away as Zelos wrapped his arm around her again, disturbing her mental image of his somber face as he'd set her down on solid ground with those bright, gorgeous wings behind him, and her smile fell as she leaned into him and they resumed walking. Now that she'd remembered that moment, though, the thought nagged at her. Should she ask about them? The fact that he'd never mentioned them while they'd been dating, nor even before their journey ended, seemed to indicate he didn't like talking about them, but they existed, and the very thought that he possessed them simultaneously fascinated and horrified her. What did they mean for him? When had he gotten them? What did they feel like? She wanted to know. The last time she'd had the opportunity to ask him those kinds of questions, that night out on the balcony three months ago, she'd chosen not to because she hadn't felt comfortable asking him something like that, but now...now she did.

Maybe it was worth a shot. If he didn't want to talk about it, she wouldn't push, but she had no way of knowing that unless she took a chance and asked him. Right?

Taking a deep breath, Sheena lifted her eyes to his. "Zelos, can I ask you something?"

His face fell and his body tensed as he looked down at her, sighing softly. "I should've known you wouldn't let that thing about my grandmother go." His eyebrows rose when she only blinked at him in response. "That is what you wanted to ask about, right?"

...Oh. Right. Yeah, she'd kinda forgotten about that. "Well, yes...no, that's not...that isn't what I..." She swallowed and looked down, leaning into him and trying again. "Yeah, I still want to ask about that, too, but that wasn't what I meant this time."

"Oh." Zelos turned his head toward hers, brushing his lips over her forehead. "Then what is it? And seriously, sweetheart, since when you do check before you ask me something? You know you can ask me anything."

Her face grew warm, and she looked down, pulling his coat tighter around her. "Well, it's just...I'm not sure you really want to talk about this. You never have before, and I...I don't want you to feel like you have to talk about it just because I'm curious."

When she lifted her head again, wanting to convince him she meant that, she found his eyes narrowed as he observed her. "Okay...? Sheena, whatever it is, just ask me. If I don't want to talk about something, I'll say so, and I certainly won't get upset about it."

She bit her lip, still hesitating. Even with his assurance, it just felt awkward asking him this. But when his eyebrows rose further, telling her to go ahead, she took a deep breath and nodded. "Okay. Your...your angel powers. When did you get them?"

Instantly, his eyes widened and he let out a soft laugh. "Wow. And you say I'm good at changing the subject."

Okay, she couldn't help herself. Whether it was because she wanted to put him at ease or because she'd been hanging around him too long, Sheena arched a teasing eyebrow. "You mean there was a subject before this?"

Zelos groaned, shook his head, and gave her a wry grin, tapping her arm with his finger. "Ha ha. Very funny, you little smart aleck."

She smirked. "I thought so."

He rolled his eyes. "You know what I meant, sweetheart."

Well, yeah, she did. "Heh. Sorry. I guess I learned the tactic from the best distracter I've ever met, eh?"

"And my horrible influence on you continues," he muttered, his lips curling upward into a smile.

"Hate to break this to you, but you have no one to blame for that but yourself," she quipped, poking his side and making him squirm as she hit a ticklish spot. Softening - and wanting to get back on the real subject - she lifted her head again. "It's just...for a minute there, the streetlight catching in your hair reminded me of your wings."

Zelos pulled back and watched her a moment, his face sinking, but then he looked away again as they continued walking. "That's right. You have seen those, haven't you?"

Sheena nodded, smiling awkwardly. "It's kinda hard to forget something like that."

"Yeah, I suppose it is," he murmured.

She quickly lifted her head again, needing him to know this. "B...but like I said, Zelos, don't feel like you have to answer the question."

He arched an eyebrow at her. "You really are curious, though, aren't you?"

"Of course I am," she said, lowering her head, trying to hide her blush. "But that doesn't mean you have to talk about something you really don't want to. I mean, you haven't volunteered anything about them before this, so I'm guessing this isn't a favorite subject of yours..."

A low sigh snuck out of him, but then he looked down at her, smiling faintly. "No, it's okay. Yeah, you're right, I don't usually talk about that stuff because...well, because it's something I've chosen not think about more than I absolutely have to. And so far it's been easy to get away with since not many people even realize I have them. I mean, if Lloyd and the others stopped to think about it, they'd probably figure it out since I do have my Cruxis Crystal now, but since none of them have asked about it, I'm assuming they've never considered it - or, more likely, they just don't care. That's why I've had an easy time ignoring them so far."

Her brows furrowed as she met his eyes again, and her footsteps slowed to a stop as she turned toward him, needing to impress this on him. "Well, I care. Especially after seeing what Colette went through to get her angel powers."

Zelos's face softened into a smile, and he nodded faintly. "I know. And that's why even though I don't, as a general rule, think or talk about them, I'll make an exception for you this time." He motioned at the approaching entrance to his mansion. "C'mon, let's find somewhere to sit. Might as well be comfortable for this." Sheena nodded and let him take her hand, lacing his warm fingers through hers and leading her through the gate and into the garden behind his mansion, finally stopping at a metal bench with a fancy latticework design that was lit by a single, glimmering lamppost. They both took a seat, and when she shivered at the feel of the cool metal beneath her legs, seeping through the thin material of her dress, he wrapped his arm around her, drawing her body closer to the warmth of his. "You warm enough here or should we go inside?" he asked.

She shook her head. While yeah, it was cool, the night was too beautiful to retreat indoors yet. The lamplight was casting a soft, gentle glow around the garden, and above, the moon and hundreds of stars shone down on them, giving the night an ethereal quality. Going inside would mean losing the opportunity to enjoy this. "No, this is fine." She pulled back a little so she could see his face. "What about you? Are you too cold without your coat?"

"Nah, I'm good." He fell silent again, looking around the garden, and Sheena just waited, not wanting to push him. Finally, he nodded and released another low sigh. "Remember that night we stopped in Altamira after getting my Cruxis Crystal from Seles? Y'know, before we headed to the Tower of Salvation that first time?"

Right after they'd gotten his Cruxis Crystal? Sheena nodded as the memory resurfaced. By the time they'd left the abbey, it had already been late afternoon, and so instead of going straight to the Tower of Salvation, they'd headed to the nearest town to rest, which had been Altamira. "Yeah...?"

"Well, that's the night my 'angel transformation' happened."

She scanned her memories again, trying to remember what had happened that night...and in the blink of an eye, the details rushed back to her. Oh. ...Oh. That had been that night. Shortly after reaching Altamira, Zelos had vanished into town, and no one had seen him again until noon of the next day. In fact, they'd lost so much time because of his little vanishing act that by the time he had rejoined them, they'd decided to hold off on tackling the Tower of Salvation until the following day.

The worst part, though, was that when he'd finally showed up, he'd been sicker than a dog. He'd never volunteered an explanation for how he'd ended up like that, and at first they'd been sympathetic, but then someone - Sheena thought it might have even been her - had theorized that he, being the idiotic, irresponsible womanizer they'd believed him to be, had headed off with a hunny or three for a 'fun night' on the town and had gotten himself completely wasted, resulting in a severe hangover, and the others had agreed it was a likely conclusion, especially when Zelos hadn't attempted to counter it. At that point, all sympathy for him had vanished. They'd briefly discussed leaving him behind and heading on without him, because someone who was stupid enough to get himself plastered the night before such an important trip couldn't be counted on should they have to battle Yggdrasill, but then Colette had pointed out that they needed him and his Cruxis Crystal to get into the tower, and they'd reluctantly decided to drag him along anyway. So instead of going directly to the Tower of Salvation as planned, they'd stopped instead in Mizuho, which was closer to the tower, so he could sleep off the rest of his stupid hangover. By the next morning, he'd been back to normal.

But what Sheena remembered most from the incident was how furious she'd been at him. How dare he pull an idiotic stunt like thatwhen they'd been trying to save Colette's life? She'd beat him up until Raine and Regal had forced her to stop (because inflicting more pain on him when he was already suffering wouldn't get them into the tower any faster, they'd insisted), and after that she'd refused to talk to him for the rest of the day, and most of the day after that, too. It had been easy to do, she remembered, because he'd avoided contact with anyone - because he'd felt so awful, she'd assumed - and when he couldn't avoid them, he'd said no more than two words at a time before heading off to be by himself again. After that, it had taken nearly three days before he'd acted normally toward her again, going back to teasing and irritating her, and it had taken even longer before Sheena had spoken any words to him that didn't include the nastiest insults she could find.

So...wait. Was he saying that was when he'd undergone his angel transformation?

Sheena swallowed hard as a knot of guilt began building in her gut. If that was what he'd really been going through at the time, then she had...she had... "O...oh. I...I thought..."

Zelos quickly nodded, pressing his lips to her temple and rubbing her arm soothingly. "Don't worry, sweetheart, I know. I deserved every name you called me that day. And while no, I didn't really get plastered that night and wasn't really hung over that next morning, it was the perfect cover for what was really happening to me, so I didn't deny it. I used my reputation as a playboy to cover over a lot of things, especially anything having to do with my connection with Cruxis."

...Oh, great Jizou. He'd clearly been feeling horrible at the time, and then she'd jumped to the conclusion she had about why he'd been feeling horrible, and then she'd yelled at him and called him nasty names and smacked him and made him feel even worse, not only physically but probably about himself, too. She wasn't sure her heart could sink any lower. "I...I'm really sorry about that, Zelos, that I assumed the worst of you like I did. I had no idea what you were really going through, and I had no right to..."

"Hey, don't you dare apologize for that, Sheena," he interrupted, his voice frighteningly serious - as was his face when he pulled back and looked at her. "What happened to me that day was my choice. Mine." He tilted his head, reconsidering. "Well, no, not really, but when Yggdrasill comes to you and says you have to become an angel, now, because now that you have your Cruxis Crystal, it'll happen eventually anyway and he needs you to be fully functioning so you can kick his opponent's asses when the time came - oh, and by the way if you don't, then he has no further use for you - you don't say 'no' and live to tell about it. And since I knew it would start happening anyway once I equipped my Cruxis Crystal to get us into the tower, even if I had the proper key crest, I figured the hell with it, I might as well get the damn thing over with - albeit not letting him use that special, ancient combat ability to alter my metabolism and expand my lifespan like he wanted to, because one lifetime is more than enough for me, thanks. Although if I'd known how awful it would be, I might have reconsidered letting him do anything to me. I mean, I knew the process would be bad after hearing about Colette's experiences, and I knew I really didn't want to do it, but even I didn't expect it to be as bad as it was."

Her eyes widened and she swallowed again, her heart sinking further. Oh. Zelos really had been in a bad position caught between three groups like that, hadn't he? He'd been trapped under everyone's thumbs and, despite what she'd thought, he'd never had any real say of his own, trying to keep everyone happy and believing he was loyal to them - at least not until the final decision, which he thankfully did make for himself. Oh, was she glad he'd made the right one. And...oh, Jizou. Had the transformation process really been that bad? It was sure starting to sound like it.

Sheena shook her head faintly. One question at a time, and right now this was the most glaring inconsistency for her. "I'm confused, though. Colette's transformation took weeks, and yet you were fine by the time we reached the Tower of Salvation. How was yours so different?"

"Heh," he uttered, but it contained no trace of humor, only grim wryness. "Let's just say I got the ultra-fast, ultra-painful version. From everything I heard, her transformation was a cakewalk compared to the one I got. And honestly, I'm glad it was easier for her, because I wouldn't wish something that awful on anyone, let alone her." Sheena's eyes widened in horror, but before she could question that further, he sighed and went on. "Yggdrasill didn't want to give away his plans and how I was his 'ace in the hole,' and he didn't want to waste time with me out of commission for long because he was getting antsy to knock you guys out of the picture, so that's why he forced the transformation on me - so no one would know I had my angel powers and you'd underestimate me in battle if it came to that. So instead of letting the process progress naturally like Cruxis typically does for Chosens, losing one sense at a time and gaining one angel power in return, he majorly sped it up for me. Something that normally takes weeks took a little over a day for me."

Sheena blinked, again searching her memories from that day, but because of how pissed she'd been and how much she'd avoided him, the details were fuzzy. Colette had lost her appetite, her sense of touch, her ability to sleep, and her voice before losing her heart. While she didn't remember Zelos eating, sleeping, or reacting to touch that day, she did remember him talking. And after that...well, he'd immediately gone back to being his old, annoying self, to the point of Presea pointing out he was acting more obnoxious than usual and asking if something was wrong. Now his over-the-top behavior then made more sense.

"I just don't remember seeing any of Colette's symptoms in you," she said. "You didn't say much that day, but I do remember you telling us to leave you alone."

Zelos shook his head. "Fortunately, the worst of those symptoms, like my inability to speak or feel anything, passed when Yggdrasill gave me the key crest that stopped the process before I completely lost my soul, right before I met up with you guys again, so no, you wouldn't have noticed anything. Don't get me wrong, I still felt horrible the rest of the day, and I was extremely tired and weak because of it, but...well, to be honest, I deserved it for getting myself stuck in that position in the first place." He shrugged. "Besides, the last twenty hours or so weren't nearly as bad as those first ten. That's why I could at least keep going to Mizuho. And after that, I felt fine. Other than having to deal with my newly enhanced senses and having to hide the fact that I had them from you guys."

"...Oh." Her stomach felt like it was being twisted into knots. Maybe she shouldn't have asked about this; hearing about his experiences hurt far worse than she'd expected. But then, chances were it would have just continued bugging her until she'd gotten answers. At least Zelos was being honest about it, not trying to minimize his suffering or change the subject. She probably shouldn't be asking this, either, but her curiosity had to know. "So it hurt?"

"Like I'd been tossed to a starving hellhound," he whispered. "I've never felt that much pain before, and I hope I never do again. It felt like...like my body was being torn apart from the inside out. All I could do was curl up in a ball on the floor and wait it out. I doubt I'd wish anything like that even on my worst enemy."

Sheena swallowed hard, tears forming in her eyes at the softness of his voice and the mental image his description evoked. The thought of a man she now loved so much having to go through that, and then to...oh, Jizou. Colette had certainly experienced her own hellish transformation, losing all aspects of her humanity before finally regaining it again, but at least she'd had friends who'd stood beside her and helped her through it. But Zelos...Zelos had had no one. And then when he'd met up with them again only to have everyone furious at him over something that hadn't even been true, all because of a mistaken assumption on her part...

"I...I had no idea, Zelos," she whispered, her head sinking downward.

"Which is exactly how I wanted it to be, Sheena."

She looked up at him again, surprised by the forcefulness of his voice, and even more surprised by the certainty she saw in his eyes. She quickly looked down at her hands and wrung them together, unable to hold his intense gaze, and nodded faintly. "I know. But still...I'm sorry you had to go through that. I wish I'd known. You shouldn't have had to suffer through that alone. Even if I couldn't have changed anything, I...I wish I could've been there for you."

Zelos shook his head, although the edge to his voice did soften a little. "I know you do, love, but I couldn't get you involved in that sordid affair. I refused to get you involved. And to be honest, I'm glad you didn't see me like that, because even though you could barely stand me at that point, I know seeing me like that still would've hurt you, because that's just who you are. The bottom line, though, is that I couldn't let you, not without putting your life at risk. You know that."

Yeah, she understood that. But that still didn't make the fact that it had been happening and she'd done nothing to help him any easier for her to bear. "I know," she said, her voice lowering further. "I know why you couldn't let me in back then. But that doesn't stop me from wishing everything had been different so I could have helped you."

He nuzzled his nose against her neck and pulled her closer as she shivered at his warm breath against her skin. "I'm still alive, sweetheart. I survived it. It's over, it's done, and nothing we say or do now can change what happened, so don't worry about it, okay? Things are a lot different now than they were back then."

Sheena sighed. He was right. Things were different - very different. She knew so much more now, not only about what he'd been doing back then, but about who he really was. And she wouldn't trade what had happened or what she'd learned about him, even though it hurt, if it meant sacrificing what they now had. "Yeah," she whispered, letting her head rest against his. "They're better now."

Zelos nodded, trailing his lips up her neck, up her jaw, up her ear, until he finally pressed a tender kiss to her temple. "Definitely."

Oh, did that feel good. Nope, she definitely wouldn't trade this, his tender touch, his gentle kiss, any of it, for anything. Where they were was exactly where she wanted to be. After a moment of enjoying the enticing feel of his lips on her skin, though, she turned her head toward him. He may have now answered a few of her questions, but she still wanted to know more. "So what angel senses do you have?" she asked, trying to ignore the feeling of his lips traveling back down to her ear. "Are they the same as Colette's?"

His lips left her ear, leaving her already missing them, and he nodded. "I think so. They seem to carve us into a pretty standard mold. For starters, I can see extremely well. Like, miles away, and in sharp detail, too. My hearing is a little too sensitive, too. If I pay attention, I can hear whispers from across a room, which has led me to hear a lot of things I wish I didn't. Sometimes loud noises are downright painful, but I've learned to block the worst of it. I can feel touch again, although extreme temperatures don't bother me like they used to, and I resumed eating and sleeping pretty quickly, although with a caveat: while I get tired and hungry, I don't need food or sleep to keep going, or at least not as much of it. From what I can tell, I can go pretty long without both without suffering ill effects, although I haven't actually tested that theory, other than staying awake a few nights while I was trying to figure out who to side with. I'm stronger now, too. Oh, and I'm pretty sure I can use that fancy schmancy Judgment spell that Kratos and Colette can...not that I've tried it yet." He released a soft, humorless laugh. "I could do quite happily without any further reminders of the fact that this whole thing ever happened."

Oh, Zelos. It was becoming painfully obvious that he wasn't happy it had happened - and knowing him, he probably avoided thinking about it as much as he could. No wonder he'd never mentioned it before. Sheena was just grateful he'd told her what he had. But one 'angel advantage' was conspicuously missing from his list. "And, of course, there's the fact you have wings and can fly now," she prompted.

He looked away from her. "Yeah. And then there's that."

Sheena watched him again, waiting to see if he would volunteer more information about that, but when he just continued looking out at his garden, she bit her lip. Should she ask him or not? He clearly wasn't thrilled with the subject, but then, he hadn't been thrilled about the rest of this, either, and he'd still been forthcoming. And this was likely the best opportunity she'd ever have to ask. Oh, she might as well. If his answer was no, well, that was that, but she didn't think it would upsethim. At least, she hoped not.

Her gaze drifted downward and her fingers lifted to his chest, playing over the buttons of his shirt. "Can I see them?" Again, Zelos didn't respond, and after a moment she looked up at him, blushing as she found his brows furrowed as he watched her, uncertainty marring his handsome features. "It's just...I have this mental picture of them, but I didn't get a good look at them since, y'know, I'd been pissed at you at the time for betraying us and you didn't stick around long after saving me, and...well, I'm curious if my memory is accurate."

Still he hesitated, his expression intense as he considered that, but finally, just when she was about to rescind her request, he nodded. "If you were anyone else, I'd say no, but since you've already seen them and this will probably keep bugging you until your curiosity is appeased...okay." He removed his arm from around her, making her silently mourn the loss of his warmth, and pointed sharply at her, his eyebrows rising expectantly. "But you are the only person I would ever make this exception for."

Oh, good. He's not mad...and this, too, is another exception he's willing to make. It made her feel special to know he was willing to do so many things for her that he wouldn't do for anyone else. She smiled faintly and followed his lead as he rose to his feet. "Thank you, Zelos. And don't worry, I won't tell anyone about them unless I absolutely have to."

Zelos nodded and returned her smile, his face softening. "I know you won't, love."

He closed his eyes and breathed in deeply, standing silently for a moment, but then, in the blink of an eye, there they were, spreading out behind him in all their brilliant, breathtaking beauty. They weren't quite how she remembered, but they were still spectacular. Sheena had to bite her lip to resist gasping at the sight before her.

After a moment, he opened his eyes, but his face was still tense - maybe even a little nervous, she thought. He clearly wasn't comfortable with this, and while Sheena wasn't sure she understood why yet, she did want to put him a little more at ease. Stepping forward so she was standing in front of him, she offered him another smile, sincerely grateful and touched that he was showing her this again, something very few people had ever seen. "Well, personally, I think they're magnificent," she said. "Glorious, even."

His eyes widened. She'd expected him to boast about how 'cool' his wings were, and yet this definitely wasn't boasting. In fact, he truly seemed surprised by that. "Really?"

"Mm hmm," she murmured, looking him over again, taking it all in. "They're beautiful, Zelos. They look really good on you."

Zelos watched her closely, as if expecting her to take that back, but she just looked back at him unwaveringly, because why would she take back something that was true? These wings really were beautiful, and they really did look good on him. After a moment, he let out a soft yet surprisingly shaky laugh. "Heh. Well, I guess I should just be glad someone can find something beautiful in them."

And again with his atypical lack of conviction. Seriously, she knew he wasn't thrilled with them, but this was more than that; this was a major sore spot for him. Giving him a warm smile, Sheena placed her hands on his chest and lifted herself up on her toes, giving him a quick, reassuring kiss before pulling back to look him over again. And then it hit her, what was 'off' about them. She tilted her head, her eyes narrowing. "Although maybe my memory is just fuzzy, but I don't remember them being this big before. I remember them being half this size."

"I dunno," he said, his body still stiff. "I didn't do anything to them. Maybe they just keep growing over time."

"Huh. Colette's never changed after she got hers."

He shrugged. "Or maybe because of the rush job Yggdrasill did on me, it took a few months for them to grow to their full size. I really don't know. And to be honest, I don't even care." He fell silent as Sheena took another step backward so she could see his entire wingspan. Wow, talk about huge...and amazing. For a moment, Zelos just eyed her and her reactions carefully, but then he suddenly cleared his throat. "So what color are they?"

Her eyes snapped back to his. "You...you don't know?" He shook his head, his face subdued, and her lips parted. Was he serious? "You've never looked?"

"I never wanted to," he replied softly. "As far as I'm concerned, they're a necessary evil." He paused a moment, but then his eyes lowered, his voice growing even softer. "I've never been able to convince myself to look at them in a mirror and see myself like that."

Great Jizou, he was serious. Sheena blinked several times, unsure whether to be amazed or worried, then took a step back toward him. This had suddenly jumped from his wings being a 'sore spot' for him to being hatred and fear of them. Did he really see nothing beautiful about them? Did he only see their ugly origin? "Y'know, Zelos, ignoring them and pretending they don't exist won't make them go away."

He gave her a half-hearted grin. "Hey, you can't blame a guy for trying, can you?"

She swallowed hard, her heart sinking further. Wow. She'd had no idea he felt that way. Unsure how to respond to that, she instead said, "Well, to answer your question, they're a beautiful, brilliant golden-orange color." Her voice lowered as she met his eyes again, trailing her fingers over his chest. And suddenly, she needed to clarify this, because she couldn't wrap her head around it. "You really...you really hate them that much?"

In the blink of an eye, his grin vanished and he released a low, shaky sigh. "I hate everything they represent, and especially that Cruxis permanently branded me like this, as one of their own. Even if I get rid of the title, I'll never get rid of these damn things. They'll always link me back to them and serve as a reminder of all the stupid, desperate, selfish choices I made." He grinned wryly and shook his head, refusing to meet her eyes. "Heh. And the worst part is I shouldn't even have them. I made it so long without needing to equip my Cruxis Crystal and begin the transformation, and then right before we rendered the title obsolete, I had no choice but to undergo it anyway to maintain my cover as that damned triple agent. And now I'm stuck with these things for the rest of my life."

His blatant bitterness and accompanying implication made her eyes widen. "Wait, are you saying they're permanent? Even if you replaced your Cruxis Crystal with your Exsphere, you still couldn't get rid of them?"

Zelos's face fell further, looking as if he'd been brutally defeated. "No. Yggdrasill assured me that once the angel transformation reached the point mine did, the physiological changes are permanent. Even removing my Cruxis Crystal can't undo them. The genetically manipulated mana signature of the Chosen's bloodline apparently reacts to the Cruxis Crystal and results in the angel transformation. That's why Presea never gained any angelic powers besides strength - because she doesn't share our blood." He tilted his head. "Well, that and because she was technically an incubator to grow a Cruxis Crystal, not a normal user of a fully powered one like we Chosens are."

"And since Colette is part of the Chosen's bloodline, that's why her Cruxis Crystal brought on her transformation," Sheena murmured.

"Exactly."

That...made way too much sense. This poor family, bred for thousands of years to be like this. They had no control over which family they were born into or what genes they were born with; how many others, like Zelos, and apparently his grandmother, too, had cursed their fate and wished to change it? No one should ever have to suffer simply because they were born. Thank goodness Lloyd had fought to change all of that - not just for the Chosens' sake, but for the sake of every person who'd ever had to suffer simply because they were born with a 'branded' genetic makeup.

"So it's genetic, passed down from parent to child," Sheena pondered aloud.

"That's my impression," Zelos said. "I'm assuming a parent doesn't even have to undergo the entire angel transformation before having a kid in order to pass it on to them; it's just something in our genetic makeup. And I'm not going to speculate what kind of impact Kratos's genetics had on Lloyd since he isn't part of the Chosen's bloodline."

Sheena bit her lip and nodded faintly, trying to digest everything. "So what would happen if, say, you had a child now that the transformation is complete?"

He shrugged. "I have no idea. I doubt it would be any different than if I'd had a kid before undergoing the transformation, but then, I obviously can't say for certain. It's not like I know of any Chosens who've had kids after they were transformed into angels; they all lost their souls and died before they could. And chances are even though I'll still be passing along these stupid genes to any kids I might one day have, it won't result in an angelic transformation in them. I mean, the odds of them ever getting near a Cruxis Crystal will be slim to none, what with Lloyd collecting and destroying all Exspheres."

He had a point. And oh, did she hope he was right about that. The thought of anyone else going through what he and Colette had sent a chill down her spine. "What about your father? Did he ever transform into an angel?"

"I can't say for certain since I barely ever saw the man, but I doubt it. No one's ever described him as being in any way 'angelic.' And Tethe'alla's been the flourishing world for so long that no one in my family's had to undergo the regeneration journey for decades. That was why everyone here was so surprised to see Colette's wings - because it's been so long since anyone had seen a real angel here."

Yeah, Sheena remembered hearing how the people in Meltokio had laughed at Colette for 'dressing up' like an angel. Stupid, ignorant people who had no idea how that poor girl had been suffering at the time - nor had they cared to find the truth. Sheena knew how that felt because she'd been laughed at here for years simply because she was a ninja who 'dressed weird.' "And what about Seles?" she went on. "Since she's related to you on your father's side, does that mean she'd react to the Cruxis Crystal the same way you did?"

Zelos nodded. "Chances are if she did, it would start the angel transformation in her, too, but there isn't a snowball's chance in Niflheim I'll ever risk that happening. Her constitution is too weak to survive such a horrible process - and I would never wish suffering like that on her. As it is, if I'd known all of this back then, I never would've given it to her for safekeeping for fear she'd get curious and try equipping it. At least she's safe from that now."

Sheena nodded again, looking down at his chest and letting her fingers play over the buttons of his shirt. Despite whatever it was Seles thought of him, he was a good brother - and she suspected if Seles would accept him more, he'd be even better to her. He truly cared about her and would do anything to protect her; how could Seles still not to see that?

But then, how could she see it? Sheena suddenly realized. If Zelos still had trouble seeing himself in a positive light, then how could his sister see him like that, either? And just like that, the pieces fit together. This whole conversation...he had answered her other question without her even asking it. His bitterness toward Cruxis was something she'd known for months, but that wasn't all. It was subtle, but it was definitely there: bitterness toward himself, too. He hated his wings, but more than that, he hated himself for putting himself in a position where he'd had to get them. And if he disapproved of himself like that...

She lifted her eyes back to his, needing to clarify her revelation. "This is why, isn't it?"

His eyes narrowed slightly as they searched hers. "This is why...what?"

"Why you have trouble believing your grandmother would be proud of you."

Zelos tensed, and for a long moment, he made no response, not even a simple nod. Finally, though, he looked down at her necklace, his voice, when he spoke, a barely audible whisper. "No matter what Robert and Eleanor might say, the fact of the matter is that I've made far too many bad choices to believe she would be happy about the man I've become."

Just as she'd thought. Her brows furrowed as she tried to get him to meet her eyes, but his gaze never left his grandmother's necklace. "Of course she would be, Zelos. She was your grandmother. How could she not be proud of her grandson?"

He shook his head faintly but still didn't look at her. "I wish it was that simple."

Sheena blinked several times as she continued watching him. Uh oh. His mood was darkening further; the storm cloud was rolling back into his eyes. Maybe this, too, she shouldn't have mentioned. But it was too late now, and really, she did want to figure out what was going on in that twisted head of his and help him sort through this. But she couldn't do that unless she knew why this bothered him so much.

"Why isn't it?" she asked. "Don't you think she would've wanted this, not just for you, but for your entire family, to be free of the 'Chosen's curse'? Based on what Robert and Eleanor said, I can't help thinking she wanted this for her family as much as you did."

Thankfully, Zelos met her gaze and observed her a moment, but then he sighed and diverted his eyes again. "Yeah, I may have gotten what I wanted, Sheena, and probably what she wanted for us, too, but at what cost? I hurt so many people to get where I am. I used everyone and everything I could to reach my goal, even though it meant trampling over them." He shook his head, his brows furrowing. "I may never have met her myself, but one thing I do know about her is that she never would've bought into the 'end justifying the means' mentality I did." His voice lowered to a mere whisper. "I was so selfish and reckless."

Sheena swallowed hard, taken aback. She'd known for months now that regret and guilt over his actions was buried within him in a place he never let anyone see, but she'd had no idea how deeply it ran. And suddenly, she didn't know what to say to help pull him from this emotional hole she'd unthinkingly pushed him into by bringing up this subject. For a long time, she'd viewed him the same way - as selfish and reckless - and chances were it was her constant scolding of him that had helped him see it in himself, but that was before she'd realized how much he'd struggled with those choices and why he'd acted as he had. And now...now that she'd peeked into the reasoning behind his actions, she viewed him completely differently. But how could she convince him of that?

"You were determined and desperate to be free," she finally said, looking down at his chest. "There's a big difference there."

He shook his head. "It's still no excuse for some of the things I did."

She nodded curtly. "I know. And no, based on the little I know about your grandmother, she probably wouldn't approve of an 'end justifies the means' mentality. I'm not convinced she wouldn't be proud of you, though, Zelos. In fact, I really do think she would be."

Zelos sighed and rubbed his face in growing frustration, but then he lowered his hand and looked her in the eye again. "Sheena, how can you say that? You're one of the people that I hurt, that I used, that I trampled on, to get here. So are Lloyd and Colette and the others. I betrayed you guys for my own selfish reasons, and I can't undo that. I agreed to betray you without even knowing why you were doing what you were doing, without even knowing who Lloyd and the others were. You have no idea how much I wish I could undo that. How can you say she would be proud of me for letting myself be tempted into siding with Cruxis, the group responsible for creating that damned title in the first place, and coming seconds away from betraying my own friends, condemning Colette to what would've been a horrible, meaningless existence as the host to a dead woman, all for something I wanted? There's no way she would be!"

Sheena squeezed her eyes shut, likewise growing frustrated, albeit not for the same reason. Damn it, she wished she knew how to alleviate his guilt and convince him it was okay and that his grandmother would still be proud of him, despite those bad choices. Taking a deep breath, she opened her eyes again. "Yeah, okay, you did that. But that wasn't all you did. Sure, you wavered over what to do, but in the end you made the right choice. Doesn't that count for something? I think she would be proud of you for making your own decisions, changing your mind, joining the 'weaker side,' and then especially for seeing it through like you did rather than running away." She took his hands in hers and gently squeezed them, her voice softening. "Zelos, we're alive because you chose to help us, to save us from those traps." She motioned at his wings. "Speaking for myself, I'm alive because you have these. They may be a symbol for you of every way you went wrong, but you're past that now. I can understand why you hate them - I can - but to me, they're something good, they're something beautiful, because if you didn't have them, if you hadn't made the choices you did, then I would've died in that hole. And more than just me, if you hadn't had the 'in' you had with Cruxis, we never would've gotten the aionis, saved Colette, beat Yggdrasill, and reunited the worlds. So yes, all things considered, I do think she'd be proud of you. Sure, you messed up plenty, but you did an awful lot right, too."

"Maybe," he whispered, observing her another moment before letting out a soft, wry laugh. "And again, you make it sound so simple. You have no idea how much I wish it was that simple, that I could look solely at the good and ignore all the bad. I'm just not sure any of the good I've done since then can balance out all of the crap."

And there, finally, was something she could relate to personally - not quite in the same way, but close enough. She wondered the same every time she thought about Mizuho: whether any of the good she'd tried to do could make up for the nightmare she'd caused it. It was a horrible feeling, never knowing if she'd done enough or if she'd ever even have enough opportunities to do so, and the worst part was that no matter how many people told her she had, they couldn't determine that; only she could.

"I know," she whispered, then swallowed hard and looked up at him again, suddenly wanting to share something with him that occasionally helped ease her own mind when she started feeling down. It might work, it might not, but it was worth a try. She shrugged. "Then maybe all you can do is look at it the way I do when I start thinking like that."

Zelos arched an eyebrow. "And how's that?"

Sheena squeezed his hands tighter. "The past will never help us atone for our sins; the only way we can do that is to look to the future. And no matter what happened yesterday, or even today, tomorrow is another day."

For a moment he was silent, considering that, but finally his intense gaze relaxed a little, the worst of its edge fading away - almost, she thought, into a faint smile - as he nodded, the action nearly imperceptible. "Yeah, you're right," he whispered. "It is."

Oh, good. Finally, she'd dispelled a portion of the darkness clouding his blue eyes. That was a mindset she didn't think about often because of what it meant for her, but deep down it was something she held fast to. After all, that was how she looked at her promise to become Mizuho's chief: as the most effective way she'd ever find to atone for her 'sins' with Volt, by doing everything she could to help Mizuho move forward into the future. Becoming chief had never been a goal of hers, and ever since she'd been selected, she had a hard time convincing herself it was something she wanted and would be good at it, but when the opportunity had presented itself, she couldn't turn it down, either. Her deep-seated need for atonement was simply too great to let her walk away.

And that was why she would become chief, whether she wanted to or not, despite her fears of the future, even if it meant eventually giving up the one thing she really did want: Zelos. She owed Mizuho far too much to let her own selfish desires prevent her from doing what she needed to do. She desperately wanted another way to present itself, a way to atone, to help Mizuho in exchange for all the ill she'd caused it, but she was realistic enough to realize that would probably never happen, and she had accepted this in case it was the only way fate would give her to do so. It was a terrifying, sobering thought, knowing what the trade-off for redemption would be, but that was how it was, and she couldn't change it. Only a gracious reprieve from fate could change the future that awaited her now, and she wasn't convinced it cared enough about her to do that.

But right now, worrying about that would just depress her, which would undoubtedly depress Zelos again, right when he'd started taking a step out of that deep, dark hole in his soul. It was time to use the truth to help him climb out of it completely. Offering him a warm smile, she gently trailed her thumbs over the backs of his hands. "Well, for what it's worth, Zelos, whether your grandmother would be or not, something we'll never know for certain, Eleanor and Robert aren't the only ones proud of you and the man you're becoming. I am, too."

His eyes widened, but something else was building there that hadn't been there a second ago: cautious hope. "Yeah?"

Her smile broadened. "Yeah. You've proven me right about what a good man you are at heart." Sheena bit her lip, carefully choosing her words. "Zelos, you are capable of so many things you don't even realize you are. And that's not a new thing for you, not a giant change in your personality; you always have been. The difference now is that you don't let anyone or anything stand in your way from doing those things anymore - not the king, not the church, not your hunnies, not other nobles...no one, not even yourself. I've seen it myself in everything you're doing now, regardless of what other people think of you, that you never would've done before. And that's how I know if you really want to make up for your 'bad choices,' you will. When you want something, you find a way to get it - and this time you'll do it without making the same 'bad choices' you did before."

And finally, his face melted, the remaining dark clouds that were marring his beautiful blue eyes dissipating. For a long moment, Zelos observed her, clearly touched, a slow smile appearing on his face. "You really think so?" he whispered.

Oh, thank goodness, Sheena thought, giving him a relieved smile. Not only is he listening, but he wants to believe me. "Yeah, Zelos, I really do."

"Heh...I guess we'll see, won't we?" he murmured, but that time there was far less uncertainty in his voice than there had been a few minutes ago. Releasing one of her hands, he gently touched the pearl pendant of his grandmother's necklace, his fingers trailing over her skin. "Well, whether she'd be proud of everything I've done before this or not, there's one choice I've made that I know she would be happy about."

Sheena arched an eyebrow. "And what's that?"

'My choice to let you wear this necklace tonight,' was what she expected him to say, but then his eyes lifted to hers and, giving her that soft, loving smile that always made her heart skip a beat, he pulled his other hand from hers and gently cupped her face, forcing her to hold his gaze. "You, Sheena. You."

Her face flared, and butterflies fluttered in her stomach, and she was pretty sure she batted her eyelashes at him, too, before her other instinct when he surprised, embarrassed, and touched her like that won out. Lightly smacking his shoulder, she smiled shyly, leaned forward, rested her forehead against his, and uttered a fond, "Idiot."

"Yeah, I know," he murmured back to her, and then he tilted his head a little and gave her a chaste but tender and oh-so-sweet kiss that made her heart swell with love. After a moment, he pulled back just enough to lightly brush his nose against hers. "I love you."

Oh, how she loved hearing those words. She lifted her head and gave him a warm, happy smile. "I love you, too."

Zelos grinned and gave her another quick kiss, then he stood up straight again, watching her softly. And it was only then that she realized, intentionally or not, he still had his wings out. At least he was happy and relaxed again. Sure, she didn't doubt he still wasn't happy about his wings, and she knew it would take him a long time, maybe even the rest of his life, to fully accept himself and his past, because chances were it would be the same for her, but she had no doubt he would keep working on it and find as many ways as he could to 'amend' for his 'sins' until he was happy with himself. And since that wasthe case, there was no more reason to dwell on that. Maybe someday she could bring it up again, but there was no need to do so right now.

Giving him another reassuring smile, Sheena stepped backwards so she could admire the beauty of the man in front of her again, then she cleared her throat and motioned at his wings. "So what do they feel like?"

His face fell a little, but that time the darkness and tension thankfully stayed at bay. "Like nothing. I can barely tell they're there, other than when the breeze blows on them."

"Which I suppose isn't surprising since they're not really physical, like a bird's wings, but more like energy," she murmured, slowly moving around him to get a better look. He didn't actually watch her walk around him, though - in fact, he didn't move his head at all, probably because he was afraid of actually seeing his wings and having a visual he didn't want. One day she hoped he could overcome that and see how beautiful they really were, but right now he wasn't ready for that, so she wouldn't push. "If you can feel the breeze with them, though, then they must have some sort of nerves in them, right?"

He shrugged. "I guess so."

Stopping behind him, Sheena observed them a moment, a sudden impulse striking her to feel them for herself. She quickly stopped herself, though, realizing she should ask his permission first, especially since he was so sensitive about them. "Can I touch them?" she asked softly, then quickly went on as he tensed again. "I mean, I know I could've asked Colette all of this, but I always felt so strange asking her about them knowing how much suffering they caused her, and I didn't want to come across like Raine, treating her like a guinea pig or something. And...well, I never felt right bringing them up when they were part of the reason I'd been sent to kill her."

Zelos considered that, his body still tense, but after a moment his head sank downward and he nodded. "If you really want to, sweetheart, go ahead."

Oh, good. It amazed her how much trust he placed in her, making so many exceptions to rules he would never break for anyone else, telling her secrets no one else knew and letting her do things he wasn't completely sure about. "Just stop me if it's uncomfortable."

He nodded, and Sheena lifted her hand, tentatively touching the far edge of his left wing. She wasn't sure what she'd expected to feel, but what she did feel surprised her. Because his wings were so energy-like, like orange-gold lights glowing out of thin air, she hadn't been sure she'd feel anything, but there was definitely something there. They felt like...like extremely dense air, although when she pushed harder on them, they gave, indicating they were flexible. More than that, though, they were very warm and made her finger tingle. In some respects, it felt like a strong yet faintly spongy and pulsing electrical energy barrier. Actually, she couldn't help thinking it felt nice, almost like an ethereal feather.

She looked up at him, even though he couldn't see her. "Can you feel that?"

Zelos tilted his head. "A little, but it doesn't feel like much. Feels okay, I guess, but nothing special."

Huh. So the nerves in his wings weren't sensitive - or at least they weren't sensitive there. But then, she was also at the far edge of his wing and nowhere near his body...were the nerves in them the same everywhere? She wouldn't pass by this opportunity to find out. She traced it inward a little, enjoying the smooth feel beneath her skin...and to her surprise, halfway between the tip of his wing and his back, he started fidgeting a little.

She briefly paused, her eyes narrowing, then slowly resumed her trek inward. "Now?"

"Yeah, that I can feel a little more...oh!"

His body tensed, and Sheena quickly stopped. "You okay?"

"Yeah," he said with a curt nod. "Keep going, sweetheart."

Hm. She wasn't sure what was going on yet, but the closer she got to his back, the more his body stiffened. She suddenly wished she could see his face so she could gauge whether whatever he was feeling was good or bad. "You're sure you want me to keep going?"

"Uh huh...oh!"

At his gasp, her fingers stilled completely, resting against the spot where his wings connected to his back, and her eyes narrowed further. He was definitely feeling something in this spot, but what? "Zelos?" she pressed.

"Heh. Do that again, love." Since he didn't sound like he was in pain, she did so, rubbing a light circle against the connection between his wing and his back. Before she could even complete the circle, though, his body tensed further and he gasped again. "Oh, wow." To her surprise, a second later, as she completed the circle, he uttered a soft, strangled moan - a sound that sent a frisson of electricity and, shockingly, desire racing through her. "Ah, Sheena?" he said, his voice rising a little. "I think you'd better stop now."

She immediately pulled her hand away and, thoroughly intrigued, walked around him so she could see him again, her amazement increasing tenfold at the sight before her. His cheeks were flushed in the soft lamplight, he was breathing quicker than normal, and his blue eyes were wide and laced with a darkness Sheena was certain she'd never seen before - not like the clouds she'd seen earlier, but almost more like...she wasn't sure what. Hunger, maybe?

"What, did that hurt?" she asked.

Instead of looking at her, though, Zelos just shook his head jerkily. "Ah...no. It definitely didn't hurt. Definitely."

Her eyebrows rose a little, a smile tugging on her lips as amusement replaced her concern. No, that definitely wasn't the expression of a man in pain. "So it felt good?"

Zelos nodded again curtly - almost shakily, she thought. In fact, his entire body seemed to be trembling a little. "Oh, yeah. Really, really good. Heh, a little too good, actually."

Sheena bit her lip, trying to hold back her smile. She almost couldn't believe this was what it seemed to be, but she had no doubt her impression was correct: Zelos was turned on. His blue eyes were wild, and hungry, and raging with desire; his voice was husky and throaty; his face was flushed; he refused to look at her; and that moan he'd just uttered...there was no other way to interpret it. She'd never seen him like this before, and it certainly hadn't been intentional now, either, but what she was seeing was...it was...

...It was incredible.

For a moment, she just gaped at him, amazed, her own heart pounding faster as warmth spread through her...oh, Jizou, was seeing him this turned on actually turning her on? She quickly pushed that thought aside. Even if it was true, she refused to think like that, because it really had been unintentional, on both of their parts. But she couldn't deny it or pretend she didn't recognize it, either, because as awkward as this was, feigning ignorance would be even worse, and maybe just plain embarrassing, for him.

So instead, she opted for the mildest way she could think of to broach the truth. "Sexually?" she quietly verified.

Zelos cleared his throat and looked further away from her, his flush deepening further. As she'd suspected, he wasn't just turned on, but he was embarrassed about it, too. If only he knew that seeing him turned on was actually having a similar effect on her, he might not be so embarrassed by it. "Ah...yeah."

"Which is why you want me to stop," she murmured, an amazed smile emerging on her lips.

He took in a deep but shaky breath, still clearly struggling to regain control and calm himself, and a moment later he swallowed. "Yeah...that road is a little too dangerous to walk right now. It probably wouldn't be a good idea for you to touch me for awhile, either."

Because he's afraid my touch would push him beyond the besieged limits of his restraint and he'd try something he doesn't mean to with me. Even after two months, and especially when she saw his struggle now, it still amazed her how stubbornly he was holding to his promise never to push her for sex. And while part of her was now curious what would happen if she'd continued - and, for that matter, was marveling that she'dbeen able to affect him like that at all - she had promised not to tease or provoke him, and so she had no choice but to agree to his request now...no matter how much the unexpected desire flaring within her left her wanting only to kiss him.

"Right," she murmured, physically holding herself back from stepping closer to him.

Zelos took another deep breath, then jerkily motioned at his wings with his thumb. "Um, I'm gonna put these things away now, sweetheart. Okay?"

That was definitely a good idea, before they tempted her to do something that really wasn't wise. She nodded, biting back another grin. "Okay."

Sheena took one last look at them before they vanished, memorizing their beauty since she doubted she'd be seeing them again anytime soon, and then they were gone. And finally, Zelos chanced an awkward, embarrassed glance at her, his face still an endearing red that betrayed how turned on he'd been by what she'd thought was a simple touch. "Heh. Wow. I, ah, I wasn't sure what to expect, but that wasn't on my list of possibilities."

He quickly looked away from her again, taking a few more deep breaths, clearly trying to counter the lingering sensations. Sheena stepped a little closer to him, unable to resist, but she didn't want to get too close and 'tease' him either, not until she was certain he was back to normal. "Mine either. I remember watching Lloyd and Genis touching Colette's wings a few times, but she just said it felt like they were tickling her. She never said anything about it having that kind of effect on her."

His eyes darted back at her, still a little wild but not nearly as bad as they had been a minute ago. The redness on his face was finally paling a little, too. At least he was looking at her again, meaning they were hopefully heading back into safer waters. "Well, I can't say if it's a gender thing or what, and I'm not really interested in asking Kratos or Yuan if that's normal for male angels, but I can tell you that that did not feel like tickling. At all."

Okay, she couldn't hold back her grin any longer. Caving to the urge, Sheena took a step closer to him and, when he didn't tense or back away, she closed the remaining distance between them. "Heh. Who would've thought that would be a...what do they call it? An erogenous zone, for you?"

Zelos smiled awkwardly, but at least he was holding her gaze again. "Yeah, no kidding. Actually, that was a step or two beyond a typical erogenous zone. Man, talk about intense."

She chuckled and returned his awkward smile, her heart pounding a little faster and a blush warming her cheeks. It was almost embarrassing, not only accidentally causing him that pleasure, but also her own desire-filled reaction at seeing him like that. Embarrassing...but also kind of exciting. "Heh. Sorry 'bout that, Zelos. I had no idea it would affect you like that. If I had, I wouldn't have tried it."

He took another calming breath, but then gave her a soft smile and shook his head, even more of the heat and wildness fading from his eyes. "That's okay, sweetheart. You don't have to apologize. It's not like you did it on purpose. And really, I'm sorry for putting you in such a weird position in the first place. I didn't know that would happen, either. I'm just glad I'm aware of it now so I won't be caught off guard like that again." He grinned. "Although I am glad if anyone was gonna discover that particular spot, it was you, not some hunny. It's embarrassing enough that it happened with you."

"Hey, don't be sorry, and by all means, don't be embarrassed," she quickly said, returning his grin. "It wasn't your fault, either. I'm the one who was curious."

"Heh. Then I guess neither of us is to blame." He shrugged. "And honestly, I was getting pretty curious there myself."

Thankfully, he really did seem to have calmed down now. Sheena took a deep breath, similarly trying to clear out her own lingering arousal, then chuckled again, offering him a shy smile. "So is it okay if I touch you again?"

His grin softened, and he nodded. "Yeah, I think we're safe again."

Oh, thank Jizou, because she wasn't sure how much longer she could resist the urge to kiss him. Gently cupping his face with her hands, she hopped up on her toes and pressed her lips to his - a kiss that Zelos quickly returned, only with far more heat and passion behind it than usual. Probably a lingering aftereffect of what had just happened, she figured, amazed, as his hands dropped to her hips and drew her closer to him, pressing her body against his, a moan sneaking out of her. But despite the added depth to the kiss, Sheena could tell he was still holding himself back, and all too soon he broke the kiss altogether, slid his arms around her, his hands slipping beneath his coat to rest against her bare back, and just held her against him in a warm embrace.

After a long moment of standing like that, savoring the feel of his breath on her neck and his hands on her skin, he pulled back and arched a pointed eyebrow at her. "Just no playing with my wings like that again, okay?"

Logic, her sense of duty to Mizuho, and guilt at keeping their relationship going so long told her to agree, but her heart and her still-aroused body had a very different idea - and thanks most likely to the champagne still coursing through her veins, she couldn't resist making an exception, just this once, and succumbing to that selfish desire. Sheena grinned wickedly, her gaze falling to his lips. "Well, not now, at least. But believe me, Zelos, I won't forget about that. One day I want to see just how far that goes for you."

At first his eyes widened at that, but then they flared again with unmistakable, fiery desire. "Promises, promises," he murmured, returning her wicked grin. "You'd better be careful, love, because I might just hold you to that...one day."

Sheena blushed deeply as he gave her one last kiss before pulling back and, still grinning, motioned that they should sit again, which she did, sinking back into his warmth as he wrapped his arm around her. And it was only as she rested her head on his shoulder and her hand on his chest and felt his steady heartbeat beneath her fingers that it hit her: what she'd just said to him, giving him false hope for the future like she had, was probably the cruelest thing she'd ever said to him - and over the years, she'd said a lot of cruel things to him. Guilt flared within her, and she buried her head further into the crook of his neck. Oh, Jizou, she shouldn't have said that. They didn't have a future together, not in a long-term, sexual sense, and she couldn't afford to pretend they did. Doing so, after all, would only make the inevitable end hurt them both all the more.

But how could she take it back now? 'Oh, by the way, Zelos, I just lied to you, and I really think we should be breaking up soon because why bother with our relationship if there's no future for us'? Yeah, like that would work - like she even could say that after the beautiful night they'd just had. And the thing was, she didn't want to take it back. After seeing his reaction to that particular stimulus, no matter how unintentional, and after feeling the heat and desire seeping into her, she wanted to see it again, to cause him that kind of pleasure and see how far those sensations went for him. She wanted her words to be true...she wanted there to be a 'one day,' a 'tomorrow,' for them, a different future than the one she dreaded, one where she could enjoy being with him and causing him such pleasure.

And for the first time ever, Sheena closed her eyes and let herself envision it: a future in Mizuho with Zelos by her side, accepting the role of the chief consort and agreeing to help her with her duties, pointing out the flaws in her logic and helping her make the right decisions, living with her in her new home, kissing her, holding her, raising children with her, happy to be there, no longer having to hold back, able to give in to desire and loving each other completely. They may have only been dating two months now, but she already knew she wanted it. No, more than just want; she craved it. If she was really being honest with herself, that would be her perfect, ideal future, being able to share those things with a man she loved this much, not with some other man she felt nothing for. It was a future, she suddenly realized, she would do anything to make happen.

Reality quickly returned, though, and the image became too painful to maintain, forcing her to banish it from her mind. That ideal future, unfortunately, would never exist, and she couldn't delude herself into thinking it ever would, not when she already knew she could never ask him to do that. It was unrealistic to believe he would ever choose that life for himself - but, more than that, it was unrealistic to believe even if he didchoose it, that he would ever be happy with it. On the contrary, he would be miserable. He'd told her once that he wanted a fun, easy life, and her future life as chief was about as un-fun and un-easy as someone accustomed to Meltokio's luxuries could find. It wasn't for him, and she would never forgive herself for letting him accept it, especially when, over time, he would grow resentful of her for trapping him there in something he'd never wanted.

And try as she might, she simply couldn't see a way to get out of her future as Mizuho's chief. In pointing out to him that there was always a 'tomorrow' to atone for their sins, she had reminded herself why she'd accepted that future for herself: to seek redemption. And, also as she'd reminded herself, that meant she couldn't back away from it, because her need to be redeemed was too powerful to let her walk away, which eliminated the possibility of running away from Mizuho to be with him. That left only one possibility for making the future she wanted happen: if her grandfather released her from her obligation to become chief. And the odds of that happening...well, after seeing the pride in his eyes when she'd completed the ritual to restore Mizuho's twelve guardians, thus approving her to become chief, she thought a sudden turnabout releasing her from that future was as likely as it was for Zelos to ever be truly happy in her village.

She could no longer deny what she'd done to them both these past two months: by letting herself fall too hard for him, she'd let him fall too hard for her, and as a result she was starting to doubt there would ever be an 'easy end' to them. The fact that he'd held himself back from something he obviously wanted tonight, again, refusing to make her feel uncomfortable or pressured, was just one of the many reasons she had fallen for him this hard and fast in the first place, and now she didn't want to let him go. She wasn't sure she even could let him go, not unless something major changed between them first. He was serious about her and about them; if she hadn't been certain about that before, she certainly was now after seeing the breathtakingly unwavering devotion he'd shown her tonight.

'They' weren't supposed to have lasted this long. Why hadn't they, opposites in so many ways, fallen apart? Why hadn't they gotten sick of each other and broken it off, like she'd expected would happen? Why hadn't she found a good reason to break up with him yet? Why weren't they bickering and insulting each other like they used to? Why was she having so much trouble getting mad at him? Why were they so happy together when it didn't make sense for them to be? She'd been counting on that, on the adversarial relationship they'd had for six years returning and, as a result, ending 'them' naturally, but it still hadn't. And now, from what she was seeing, it wasn't going to. If left as it was, she just couldn't see an end to them other than the artificial one Mizuho would one day force on them. She didn't understand it, but she couldn't deny the facts, either: they worked together and were happy together, and Sheena didn't want to let that go.

She was happy with him, after all - truly happy...happier than she'd ever believed possible for herself. If it wasn't for this uncertainty about the future weighing her down, her heart would be soaring. It was a happiness she never wanted to lose, and the longer they stayed together, and the closer they became, and the more beauty she saw in him, and the deeper she fell in love with him, the more scared she was becoming of the future taking it all away from her. If she'd fallen this hard for him in only two months, how much worse would it be by the time the inevitable end became imminent?

Those thoughts settled in her stomach like a lead pipe. She desperately wanted her words to him to be true, and she desperately wanted that ideal future to become reality; she just didn't know how to make it happen. And for a moment, she almost asked him what his thoughts about the future were, where he saw them going, and how likely he thought it was that 'they' would survive the ominous storm brewing on the horizon; she almost asked him if he would ever consider coming to Mizuho to be with her, almost told him her doubts and fears and begged him to reassure her that everything would work out, to promise her they would be together forever, that nothing would ever take him away from her. She needed to hear those words to put her heart at ease so she could give in and love him the way she wanted to.

Before she could utter even a single word, though, she bit her tongue and squeezed her eyes shut. Jizou help her, she couldn't. She couldn't make him feel obligated to make promises he couldn't keep to try to alleviate her fears, and so she refused to put him in that position - which meant keeping that dreary uncertainty to herself. And she couldn't end this with him, either; she couldn't give him up, not after the beautiful night they'd had, not after hearing him say she was 'something amazing worth holding onto,' and especially not after he'd just displayed so much trust in her by showing her his wings. Their relationship might be doomed, and the end, when it came, would probably kill her, but she was just too selfish and scared to deal with that tonight. And really, she reminded herself, as unlikely as it was, there still was a slim, nearly impossible, but still extremely powerful hope burning within her that maybe something would change her future. She didn't know what it might be or how likely it was to happen, but that particular hope did exist, and she'd be damned if she let it slip away and gave up on a man she loved and would do anything to be with.

Fate, please, she prayed. Please, let me enjoy this moment, this love, for as long as I can. Please send me, us, a future different from the one I'm afraid is coming. Please let me stay with him, let us stay like this, a little while longer.

Please.

"Hey, sweetheart, you okay?"

Sheena started as Zelos nudged her and pressed a kiss to her shoulder that, as always, sent a shiver racing down her spine and made her heart pound faster. "Hm?" she murmured, turning her head further toward him, unable to resist smiling as he trailed his lips up to her cheek and pressed another kiss there. This man was so tactile - something she'd always known about him, considering all the times he'd teasingly tried to grope her, but that now was so gentle, with so much love and meaning behind it, that she couldn't push him away even if she wanted to...and she definitely didn't want to. "Yeah, I'm fine. Just thinking."

His lips left her ear and he looked at her, his eyes narrowing slightly. "About...?"

As much as she wanted to discuss her fears with him, she couldn't, and so she opted instead for a slightly different - but no less true - subject. "I almost can't believe I'm saying this, but I had a really nice time tonight."

His eyes widened. "Really?"

She nodded and gave him a soft smile. "Unbelievable, huh? I never thought I'd enjoy one of these parties, but I did. You made it fun. And...well, it's not like I can complain about getting to spend so much time with you." Her smile broadened into a grin as she saw him grin. Oh, how she loved making him happy. "Granted, I could've done without having to mingle with fake noblemen, deal with weird rivals, and plod through stuffy, awkward conversations with nobility, but I'm still glad I came with you."

Zelos's grin softened, and he pressed another kiss to her cheek, leaning his head against hers and pulling her tighter against him. "Thanks for agreeing to it, Sheena," he said, his voice lowering. "You have no idea how much I appreciate your making an exception to your no-Meltokio-parties-ever rule for me. Tonight was, by far, the best time I've ever had at one of these things." She could feel his lips pull upward in another smile. "And that last time doesn't count because we didn't spend much time at the party itself."

If she had known what would come of taking a chance with him as she had that night, she would have demanded the Chosen One take a 'mental holiday' years ago. Oh, was she glad it had happened as it had, because she wouldn't trade this for anything. And she didn't want to think about being forced to trade this, him, for her own redemption anymore, so she wasn't going to.

"Of course," she said. "I know you'd do the same for me if our positions were reversed."

"Of course I would." He pulled back and arched an eyebrow at her. "So does this mean I might be able to talk you into coming with me to one of these things again?"

The hopeful look in his eyes, reminding her that he really did enjoy her company, made her blush again. "Well, let's just say I doubt you'll have to do too much persuading." Seeing him smile again, Sheena pressed a tender kiss to his lips, then pulled back, needing to tell him this. "Every time I see you lately, you're doing things for me that I never expected you to do, things you don't have to do and that you're probably not enthused about, either. So the least I can do is give you the same when you need something from me. I love you, Zelos, and I want to give you back something in return for everything you've given me, even if it means making exceptions like this."

Zelos observed her a moment, his blue eyes soft and admiring. "I'm not sure I understand this yet, but those things really don't seem all that bad when you're doing them for someone you love."

"No, they really don't," she whispered back to him.

He gave her another quick kiss. "Well, I really do appreciate it, sweetheart."

Yeah, he did; she could see his gratitude shining in his eyes. And seeing that happiness truly did make any discomfort she'd felt tonight worthwhile. "And I really do appreciate all the effort you've made to be honest with me these past two months, to help me out so much, to trust me with the real you, and to appease my curiosity by doing things I know you're not comfortable with, like showing me your wings. I feel so selfish at times, accepting everything you do for me without doing anything for you in return."

His smile faded and he shook his head. "Don't. I don't want you to feel that way, that you're being selfish or that you have to do something because you think you owe it to me."

"No!" she said, her eyes widening. "No, that's not it. I'm doing it because I want to, Zelos, because I love you. I'd do it no matter what. I'm just glad to have an opportunity to do something for you in return for everything you've done for me. It's only fair."

Thankfully, his smile returned, even though he shook his head again. "You don't even realize how much you've already done for me, do you? Just by giving me a second chance, you gave me so much more than I'll ever deserve. You've helped me find the beauty, the good, where I've never seen it before - in nature, in creating things, in being helpful. The truth is, Sheena, I can't imagine not doing that stuff anymore to repay you for everything you've already done for me."

Sheena beamed him a soft, happy smile. "And neither can I."

Cupping her face with his free hand, Zelos leaned forward and lightly nuzzled his nose against hers, then gave her another sweet, tender kiss before pulling away and drawing her back down to rest against him. She settled against him, enjoying his warmth, and closed her eyes, taking his hand in hers and giving it a squeeze. "I wonder how many other exceptions I'll find myself willing to make one day," he murmured, his voice so soft that if she hadn't been sitting beside him, she wouldn't have caught it. "I guess I can't dismiss the possibility that those things will eventually win me over, too, can I?"

Her eyes narrowed and she lifted her head so she could see him. "What was that?"

He smiled warmly and shook his head. "Nothing. Just talking to myself."

Kissing her cheek again, Zelos drew her back down to him, and despite her curiosity, Sheena let it go. It really hadn't sounded like he was beating himself up again - just musing to himself. And again, as she closed her eyes and sank into his warmth, she couldn't help envisioning that perfect, ideal future with him - but the ache of yearning and desire for something outside her reach quickly overwhelmed her, and she had to force it aside, unwilling to let herself get her hopes up for something that wasn't meant to be.

After all, as much as she wanted to hold onto him, to stay with him like this forever, one day love would lead her to do something she would never willingly do otherwise. One day, for his sake, assuming fate didn't change everything first, love would finally win out, she would place him and his happiness above her own selfish desires, and she would let him go. She hated the thought of it, but deep in her heart she knew what she would eventually have to do, and when that time came, when she couldn't buy herself any more time and no other choice remained, she would be strong, she wouldn't second-guess herself, and she would do it. And when that happened, this coveted relationship would become nothing but a beautiful memory of a time when she had enjoyed life, when she had lived and loved and helped a man she adored do the same.

But tonight it wasn't imminent, and right now, she was too emotionally weak to even consider doing so. Tomorrow, this week, this month, this year, this decade...it could happen at any time, and one day it would. She didn't know exactly when, but one thing she did know was that it wouldn't be today. And so, until she had to lower her head from the clouds and face reality, she would enjoy the present and these beautiful moments they had together for as long as she could. 'One day,' after all, was just too far away.

"I love you, Zelos," she whispered.

He pressed a kiss to her forehead and gave her body a tender squeeze. "I love you too, Sheena."

His voice and his embrace were so warm and affirming that she had no doubt he meant that. And soon enough the bubble of warmth and love surrounding them did as it always had before and left her conflicting thoughts and feelings, her questions and fears, fading into nothingness, lulling her into a sense of safety and security, of desperately coveted peace and happiness, that she was simply incapable of fighting.

And so she surrendered to the love and warmth and hope for that beautiful, perfect, idealistic future. Zelos had said before that he viewed her as 'something amazing worth holding onto,' and she viewed him the same. And she'd be damned if that wasn't what she did until 'one day' arrived and yanked him out of her reach.

But for now, she wouldn't worry about that. For now, the present was too enticing. For now, she would enjoy this night, and tomorrow they would go back to Mizuho and plant her precious iris, and then after that...well, after that, anything was still possible.

Anything.

~Fin~