Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, the movies or the books. The characters, settings and some events in this fanfiction all belong to Rowling, but I don't think she'd want to stake claim to this fanfic as slash is probably not something she's openly ecstatic about (but she secretly loves it XD). I make no profit from this fan fiction.

Title: The Troubles of a Werewolf

Rating: M, NC17, R. Errm, just not for kiddies, rated for graphic slash scenes, a little bit of coarse language and mention of rape. DON'T RUN AWAY, IT'S NOT LIKE THAT! It really doesn't take away from the story, I don't make the character seem like a helpless Mary Sue because of it and it only mentions; no details of the event. Please don't leeeeave!

Warnings: Slash (obviously) which means manXman, mention of rape, a teensy bit of fluff (cuteness), graphic (consensual) sex scenes, and Sirius/Remus.

Description: When Remus is injured by the circle of werewolves Dumbledore has told him to join as a spy, Sirius is there for him. Their friendship is strengthened but what will happen when the werewolves start to suspect that Sirius is closer than a friend? (There will be some fluff, smut and I suck at summaries so please just read it! Setting is before Harry is born).

Word count: Don't know yet.

Additional Notes: I can't seem to make this story sound better but I assure you it's better than it sounds (I think). I really tried with this, I haven't written fanfiction in a while and I'm up to my ears in study but I really do love this story and pairing so I've worked hard with it. Just take a squiz and let me know what you think. ^_^ My readers are cherished and glomped heartily :D

Read!

OOOOOOOOOO

Chapter 1

Sirius looked around at his apartment.

It seemed so empty.

He'd just got home from work at the Ministry where he was training to be an Auror and he was tired, so tired, but there was something missing today. His apartment seemed so quiet and empty; it needed something or someone to liven it up.

Annoyed with this sudden need for human companionship, he moved aimlessly around his apartment, switching the radio on and then turning it off, opening a bottle of firewhisky and only taking a couple of swigs. It wasn't boredom as such, it was a restlessness that was hard to describe. He wanted to go somewhere, to see people even though he'd spent his whole day with his fellow trainees. But it wasn't just people he needed to see; it was his old friends. Since they had all been working so hard for the Order and against He Who Must Not Be Named, they had little time for anything other than sleep. In fact, he hadn't seen Remus in almost a month. Sirius turned suddenly sharpened eyes to the calender on the wall. Last night was the full moon and Remus had been with the werewolves again, trying to convince them that he was on the Death Eaters' side so he could spy on their plans for the Order. Why hadn't he remembered to visit him the day before? He always checked in on him the day before the full moon because he knew how rough it was on Remus.

Well, he'd go now then.

With his new destination in mind, Sirius slipped his robes back on and walked out of his apartment, relieved that he'd found a solution to his restlessness. He hoped Remus was okay; werewolves were dangerous at the best of times but when you're trying to double cross them it was a basic act of suicide. Sirius had never liked the idea from the start but Remus had said, "I'm the only one who can do it and it's helpful to the Order. I want to do whatever I can". Do-good git, he was going to get himself killed.

Sirius apparated just outside the door to Remus' apartment and knocked on the thin wood. As he waited for an answer he glanced around at the hall in the apartment building Remus lived in. It wasn't too flashy, he knew; the walls were obviously thin and the light on the ceiling was flickering like a frantic heartbeat. He knew Remus couldn't afford much better not from any fault of his own but because when his employers figured out he was a werewolf he always got fired and sometimes blacklisted. Sirius, James and Peter had offered to help him many times but he never accepted money; he wanted to survive and show people that a werewolf could succeed by his own hard work. His friends respected and understood that but they hated to see him suffer for something he couldn't help.

Sirius turned his attention back to the door in front of him but there was still no answer from the inside. He knocked again, sure that Remus would be here: after a full moon he always needed to rest up and it was either at home or in St Mungo's. After a couple more minutes of him straining to hear a reply over the loud rock music pounding from the room across the hall, Sirius felt his hair start to stand on end. Doggy instincts; something wasn't right and he could smell it.

Blood.

In a flurry of cold fear, Sirius whipped out his wand without a second thought and cast the Alohomora charm on the lock. He overdid it a bit in his panic and the door swung open and hit the wall with a loud smack but Sirius didn't hear it. His foot had slid slightly in something slippery on the floor and what he saw when he looked down made sweat form on his forehead and under his arms and his heart pound like he was running a race. He was standing in a a small puddle of blood but it didn't stop there; there was a trail leading further into the dark apartment. Somewhere in the back of his mind, Sirius knew he should follow his Auror's training, approach this situation with a cool, rational mind but this was one of his best friends, this was Remus and all he could think was, "Please be okay".

He cautiously followed the trail of blood, going as quick as he could while trying to watch for any movement. He followed the morbid trail all the way to Remus' bedroom where the door was halfway shut. Sirius' eyes froze on the door where the impression of a bloody, smeared handprint was clearly visible.

Moony.

Sirius pushed open the door, terrified of what he might find waiting but needing to see, hoping that his friend was okay, but what he saw in the room made his limbs feel cold and foreign and his heart feel as if it had stopped beating. Remus was lying on his back on the floor in a puddle of blood. Heedless of the fact that there might be someone else in the room, Sirius rushed forward, stepping over the blood to crouch beside Remus' head. There were no lights on in the apartment and the sun had almost set so Sirius could not see Remus' face but he could hear the faint sound of short, rapid breathing coming from the still figure. Sirius cast a spell at a bedside lamp and it lit up the small room with surprising brightness and he could finally see the extent of the damage done to his old friend. Remus had a deep gash on his cheek, dark bruises on his face, a nasty looking split on his forehead, a bleeding lip and his shirt and pants were soaked with blood from unseen wounds.

He was a mess but he was alive.

Sirius gently touched the pale face as if he couldn't believe this was really Remus, he looked so much younger and more vulnerable than he did a month ago and Sirius couldn't imagine why anyone would do this to him; he was so non-violent and the peacekeeper, he was so kind. Why would anyone do this? He felt white-hot anger bubbling in the pit of his stomach but he quelled it for the moment; he had to make sure Remus was alright before he killed whoever had done this. He revived him using a spell and waited for Remus to open his eyes. Remus let out a low groan of pain and his breathing got faster and more shallow as if coming back to consciousness was causing him a lot of pain. It was a few moments before he opened his eyes and when he did they were clouded over with confusion and pain. Sirius was greeted with the familiar gentle, light brown eyes but only for a second because the confused, groggy gaze turned terrified. Remus' eyes widened and he recoiled from Sirius, letting out a strangled shout. Surprised, Sirius jumped back but regained his senses when he saw Remus' hand flick lightning-quick towards his wand in his pocket.

"It's me, Moony. It's Sirius".

Remus froze at the familiar voice and nickname, eyes wide and then his hand and gaze dropped and he let out a sigh of relief. Sirius also let out a breath, unaware that he'd been holding it in. He moved closer to Remus again, his eyes glancing over the blood-soaked clothes.

"What happened?"

He received a mumbled reply and he was about to press the subject but reasoned that he could ask questions later; right now, he had to get Remus better.

"We need to get you to St Mungo's. You've lost a lot of blood", he made to stand up but a hand, dyed dark red, grasped his wrist.

"No, no one must know".

Sirius stopped and stared at Remus in disbelief.

"No one must know? You were attacked, look at you! You need help".

"No".

Remus' voice was quiet and slightly slurred and his eyes were starting to go out of focus again.

"Stay with me, Moony", Sirius coaxed, moving closer to steady his friend, "Come on, we have to get you to a healer". At the mention of a healer, Remus' eyes unclouded and he stated firmly, "No, it's not as serious as it looks".

Dumbfounded, Sirius exclaimed, "You're bleeding like crazy and you're about to pass out again! That's serious".

"I don't need a healer, it can be fixed with a couple of simple spells".

Sirius' eyes narrowed.

Something was not right here. Why didn't Remus want anyone to know he'd been attacked?

"Sirius, please, I'll be okay", Remus pleaded quietly.

Sirius sighed. If Remus didn't want to see a healer there was nothing he could really do about it short of carrying him to one; he'd just have to try and heal Remus' wounds as best he could.

"Where are you hurt?", he asked resignedly.

Remus looked up at him with a strange look in his eyes.

"If I told you to leave and let me heal myself you would never do it, would you?"

Sirius looked shocked.

"Of course bloody not. Like I could leave you like this, what do you take me for?"

Remus smiled weakly, "I didn't think so, so there's no point in telling you to get out but you have to promise you won't tell anyone what's happened".

Sirius was about to protest and ask why but he decided that stopping the bleeding was more important right now so he agreed, nodding his head.

Remus hesitated for a moment, fixing Sirius with a thoughtful look before saying, "It's my back that's bleeding the most now I think".

Sirius helped Remus sit up properly and lean forward. He lifted the back of Remus' bloody shirt very gently, his face getting darker with anger as more of the back was revealed. Long gashes, still oozing blood, were gouged deep into Remus' back, obviously the work of very sharp, very large claws.

"Who?" Sirius said quietly in his most dangerous voice.

"I'll tell you later, please just hurry".

Although Sirius was not in the mood to compromise, he complied because Remus' voice sounded faint as if he was going to blackout again. Sirius knew his healing powers were sound but as his wand trailed over the wounds he knew Remus would still have faint scars, so deep were the gashes. When the flesh was glued back together with magic and bloody lines were all that were left of the wounds, Sirius trailed a hesitant hand over them, more to reassure himself that this wasn't a dream than to soothe.

"Where else?" he asked.

Remus turned to him, pointing to his chest.

"I tried to heal it before but I don't know if it worked properly because I passed out afterward".

Sirius pushed the front of Remus' shirt up, inspecting the three jagged, red, closed wounds that led from Remus' shoulder to his navel. They looked like they'd healed alright so he left them but he couldn't help but think that if Remus hadn't healed them when he did, he probably would have died from blood loss. The thought chilled him to the bone so he busied himself with inspecting Remus' head injuries to take his mind off it. He healed them too, deciding to bandage the wounds after they had been cleaned which meant he had to get Remus to the shower soon.

"Anywhere else?"

Remus looked away carefully and shook his head.

"C'mon then, shower; have to get all this blood off you", he muttered as he got to his feet, ignoring the disturbing feeling of Remus' blood soaked into his clothes, weighing them down. He bent down and carefully slung one of Remus' arms over his shoulders so he could help him up but as soon as Remus tried to take his own weight by standing, his knees buckled and his face contorted in pain. Sirius was able to support him before he fell by quickly wrapping his arm around Remus' lower waist, done while trying not to touch the gashes on his back. Sirius frowned; Remus' wounds shouldn't have hindered him from walking, painful though they must be.

"What is it? Where does it hurt?", he asked, trying to see if any of the wounds had reopened but he saw no fresh blood.

Remus didn't answer for a few moments and Sirius was starting to wonder if he was losing consciousness when he turned his head to face him and said in a faint voice, "It's nothing, just bruising".

"Tell me where, I'll heal it".

"No, don't worry about it, I'll do it later".

"Just tell me, Moony".

Remus dropped his head, refusing to look at Sirius.

"Why can't you tell me?" Sirius asked, confused. If it was just bruising, what was so bad about that?

"Because I made a stupid mistake and it cost me", Remus replied bitterly, "It's nothing more than that".

"Come on, Moony, there is more to it than that; I can tell", Sirius pressed; his back was starting to ache from holding most of Remus' weight but he didn't want to move in case it hurt him again.

Remus kept his gaze anywhere but the man holding him up, as he seemed to steel himself to give his answer.

"I made a stupid mistake and I stepped out of line", he stated quietly, "There are no second chances with werewolves and I was put back in my place by a more dominant werewolf using the usual method used by animals".

Sirius looked at him sharply as realization started to dawn on him but Remus refused to meet his gaze and continued in the same very quiet, matter-of-fact tone.

"I don't remember it well because I was a werewolf at the time and as you know, I don't really remember what I do while I'm a werewolf, I only know for certain that it happened because of the pain. It hurt but it was a simple act of dominance and nothing more".

Remus fell silent and Sirius was lost for words.

Sirius' mind was whirling. He never thought this would have happened. How? Was Remus not protected at all when he was with the werewolves? No back up, no back up plan in case something like this happened? And now Remus had to deal with this. Sirius couldn't even imagine what he must have been feeling but the thought of him being hurt in such a way made him sick to his stomach. Whoever was responsible was going to suffer dearly; how dare they hurt and degrade such a good person. Remus always tried so hard to do the right thing, he was the foundation the Marauders were built on; he brought them together because they wanted to show him he wasn't alone by becoming Animagus', he was the calm, rational one and had kept them from danger, he didn't deserve to be treated like that. This was wrong.

"Sirius, you're shaking".

The quiet voice broke through his thoughts and he realized he had been holding so tightly to Remus in anger that he'd started to shake. He relaxed a fraction but his mind was still reeling with a million thoughts.

"Please don't tell anyone".

Sirius' eyes narrowed.

"Don't tell me you think it's your fault because that's bullshit".

Remus smiled faintly.

"I knew you'd say that".

"It's true; it's not your fault in any way", Sirius said vehemently.

"Just promise you won't say anything".

Sirius considered that for a moment before replying, "Fine, that's your call but I'm going to kill Dumbledore for not stopping this".

"Sirius!" Remus looked at him sharply, "It's not his fault. Don't -".

"Listen, we'll talk about who I'm going to kill after you've had a shower and washed all that blood off".

Remus looked worried at the sound of Sirius killing people but there was no room for argument as Sirius half carried – half helped Remus into the adjoining bathroom. He put Remus down and leaned him against a wall, trying to ignore the way his chest tightened when Remus winced in pain.

"Do you need help with anything?" Sirius asked, reaching out to steady his friend when he swayed.

"No, I'll be fine", Remus assured him, steadying himself against the wall.

"Are you sure you don't want a healer to check you over?" Sirius pressed anxiously, feeling awfully like James' mother when she fussed over their various Quidditch injuries.

"No, I can heal myself now".

Sirius nodded and turned to leave, wishing he had something helpful to say but all he could think of was "Don't pass out", and he didn't think that would help much anyway.

He shut the bathroom door behind him, forcing himself to not look back at Remus and show his worry for him. He paused, leaning against the door and just wanted to sink to the floor in both mental and physical exhaustion but he remembered all the blood and decided he'd better clean it up before he slipped in it.

He spelled all the lights on, used simple charms to clean up the blood and put the kettle on for some tea. He also changed the sheets on Remus' bed because a little blood had found it's way to it and made Remus some soup because he figured he'd need to get his strength back up and food would help.

He knew he was overdoing it but he didn't know what else to do. He didn't have any words of comfort to offer Remus or any help he could offer at all, so he did the only thing that would be helpful to his friend: he was just trying to take care of him. Lily was the one who was good at this stuff; effectively showing people that she cared and all that. He'd never been good at that. The most he usually offered was a sarcastic comment or a straightforward remark. He couldn't help it; he just couldn't imagine ever showing people that he cared for them. And judging by the smell of the soup that was now simmering on the stove, he was still terrible at taking care of people. It smelt like it would be more likely to give Remus severe bowel movements than make him feel better.

Sirius was debating with himself whether to throw the soup out or not when he heard the shower stop and remembered that Remus' wounds still needed bandaging. After a few minutes of rummaging around in Remus' cupboards he found some bandages and a potion that would ease the pain. He was just pouring some in Remus' tea when Remus came out of his bedroom with his hair still wet and dressed in warm pajamas. Seeing Remus not covered in blood from head to toe made Sirius relax a bit and he smiled faintly at him.

"Feel better?"

Remus nodded, taking a seat at the kitchen table and fixing Sirius with a firm look.

"You should go home, Padfoot; you look exhausted".

"Nice try, Moony, but I know you too well for that", Sirius grinned, setting the tea down in front of Remus. He knew what Remus was doing: he didn't like showing pain in front of anyone and he wanted to be left alone so he could let it out but Sirius knew leaving him alone probably wasn't a good idea seeing as how he really should have been in a hospital bed with at least three healers looking after him. Werewolf wounds were notoriously unpredictable and dangerous. So Remus needed him whether he liked it or not and Sirius was going to make sure he was there no matter what Remus said.

"I'm not leaving, give it up and drink this; it'll help with the pain", he said stubbornly.

Remus obeyed, taking a long drought of the hot tea but he wasn't finished arguing.

"Thank you for all you've done but I can look after myself now, I'm not helpless".

"I would never think you were but I'm staying", Sirius stated calmly, sitting down on a chair across from Remus to emphasise his point, "Besides, my place is cold and boring so I need a change of pace".

They both knew it was a lie and the real reason why he was staying was clear to them both. He knew leaving Remus alone with his thoughts and whatever memories he had was not a good idea, but voicing the thought wasn't too appealing either. So Remus accepted the lie. He knew he would never win the argument anyway; Sirius was too good a friend to let that happen.

He looked down at the cup of tea in his hand and was silent for a couple of moments. Sirius was such a good friend to him and for all his protests that he'd be alright alone, he was immensely grateful that Sirius was staying the night.

"Thank you", he muttered into the cup, still not looking up.

Sirius barely heard him but he understood the meaning behind the words.

"What are friends for?"

Remus looked up to see one of Sirius' trademark roguish grins aimed at him and he smiled back. Awkwardly, he drank some more tea, the hot drink warming his stomach and spreading all the way to the tips of his fingers which felt good because he'd been feeling very cold even after the hot shower.

"You still look kind of pale, do you want some soup?" Sirius asked.

"You made soup?", Remus replied, surprised.

Sirius felt his face heat up and he stood up and fetched two bowls to hide it.

"I figured you might be hungry", he shrugged as he poured some soup into a bowl.

He put one down in front of Remus and sat down with the other.

"It's probably not that good, I'm not used to cooking and you know that my mother wasn't the type to teach her kids domestic skills".

They both smirked at the image of the foreboding Mrs Black teaching a young Sirius how to cook.

Sirius ate a spoonful of the soup and made a disgusted face.

"Worse than Cockroach Cluster".

Remus swallowed his own mouthful and laughed in agreement.

"Definitely, but it's hot and making me tired so it's good", he replied, taking another spoonful.

"Glad it works for you", Sirius muttered, reluctantly eating more.

They finished the soup and left the bowls unwashed in the sink and then Sirius spotted the roll of bandages on the bench.

"I almost forgot", he muttered picking it up.

Understanding, Remus sat down while Sirius wrapped up his head and torso in bandages just in case the wounds reopened so the flesh would be held together somewhat and he wouldn't lose too much blood.

"I don't have anywhere for you to sleep, Sirius", Remus said as he put his shirt back on over the bandages. Sirius recognised this as Remus making one last attempt at getting him to go home.

"Got it covered", Sirius replied simply with a wink.

With a small pop he changed into the familiar shaggy, black dog and walked off in the direction of Remus' bedroom, tail wagging and tongue lolling. Realizing what Sirius was getting at, Remus followed him.

"No, Sirius, absolutely not; you'll cover my bed in dog hair", but he was too late, Sirius had already jumped up on the double bed and was making himself comfortable. Remus stopped at the doorway and sighed but he could barely conceal a smile. Seeing the grin tugging at the corner of Remus' mouth, Sirius grinned a doggy grin and wagged his tail happily.

"Fine, but dogs aren't allowed in this building so stay quiet".

He slipped beneath the clean covers next to the dog and switched the bedside lamp off. Everything was silent and dark for a few moments before Remus heard the bed creak as the dog squirmed his way to lie curled up right against Remus' side. He smiled in the dark, extremely grateful for the company on such a night. He reached down and stroked the messy, black hair on the dog's head and felt reassured by the warmth he found there.

"Goodnight, Sirius".

Sirius huffed in reply and closed his eyes and almost at the same time, Remus was falling into an exhausted sleep.

OOOOOOOOOOOO

I hope I didn't make Remus sound too OOC or Mary Sue -_- Feel free to flame me if I did, I'd totally deserve it.

PS: I lawled at the amount of times I used the word 'serious' in that chapter! XD I didn't actually do it on purpose :)