One More
This is just a beginning sort of introduction to the whole plot of the story.
Please enjoy the family craziness, because it is indeed short.
If you want me to continue, you liked/hated it, such and such was funny, you want more elaboration or a certain couple, or you need a question answered, THEN PLEASE REVIEW. It's honestly what makes me write. Thanks for reading, please enjoy.
DISC: DO NOT OWN NARUTO
Chapter One
There was something particularly awful about waking up on Monday mornings.
Maybe it was the earliness, or that I actually had to get up and go to school. Or maybe it was the fact that my bed had just exploded.
As you can imagine I was sleeping in that very warm, soft, comfortable bed, and then I was on the floor, and the bed was up in flames.
I stumbled out the door, grabbed the fire extinguisher I kept in the hallway, and put it out.
And then I went to go kill my step brother.
"Deidara!" I screamed, stomping downstairs to a silent (as always) smirking Itachi. His eyes looked dark and amused as he sipped a steaming cup of coffee, long dark hair cascading down his shoulders. He wore his usual, dark jeans, and a black t-shirt.
Konan, of course was standing in the kitchen making something that smelled- good. She was sporting a particular cute black dress, and clunky combat boots, her blue hair pinned perfectly in place. Out of my step siblings, they got along the best, as Hidan put it, "Fucked up anti social freaks stick together."
"Sakura, before you go rip off Deidara's balls and feed them to him, might I suggest some food first?" Konan smiled sweetly, and I rolled my eyes. She handed me a plate of pancakes.
"You probably planned this, I swear to god." I told her as I began shoveling food into my mouth at a rate one would call crazy, already settled on the beautiful kitchen table.
Well, in this house, you either ate fast, or you didn't eat at all.
Itachi followed suit, but as usual the damn girly boy managed to eat with an elegant grace as I chomped and slurped my way through the meal.
I figured the morning couldn't get much worse.
Sometimes I wonder where I get my optimism from, as a very pissed off Hidan picked up a very scared looking Deidara and threw him across the room.
Right into my god damn pancakes.
The plate shattered, syrup landed in my hair, the table cracked, Deidara screeched, and Itachi picked up his plate and smiled at me sweetly.
"That is the last fucking time you blow up my TV. I swear to god Deidara-" Hidan finally looked up, and noticed me, his purple eyes widening. "Why the hell is there a pancake in your hair?"
"Because you threw Deidara on the table!" I yelled, standing up. "Who the hell throws someone on a table any how?"
"Well, the bitch did blow up my TV. And your bed, as I heard from Sasori."
"That doesn't give you the right to throw me on the table, yeah." Deidara interjected, and I turned my blazing green eyes on him.
"And you! You little god damn blond she male! You fucking blew up my bed!" Deidara didn't seem fazed. "With me in it!"
"It was art, yeah. The cherry blossom burst into flames, an instant bloom, and then she was gone, yeah.' I just couldn't help myself, before I knew what I was doing, my fist had smashed down into the table, missing Deidara's face by a centimeter.
The table cracked in half, and I stomped off.
'I'm going to take a shower." I called behind my shoulder hotly. I could hear Hindan snicker, as Deidara groaned. The fall must of hurt his back, it was a pretty tall table.
"She called you a she male. That's better than bitch!" Hindan laughed louder.
"Shut up, yeah."
I reached the bathroom, which by the way, was basically hell on earth.
We had one bathroom, eleven kids, counting me, and one parents.
One god damn fucked up, messed up, hell of a bathroom.
It was yellow, small, big enough to fit a toilet, a sink, and a shower, but the worst was the amount of stuff in it.
Every surface was covered, there were razors, shaving cream, tooth brushes, clumps of hair, toothpaste, shampoo, conditioner, acne cream, lotion, hairbrushes, it was a war zone.
I stripped, kicking my clothes off into one corner, I stepped around what I could, although I did hear a crack of something. With my luck, I had probably broken Kakuzu's favorite comb.
I turned on the water, cold, as usual, and put a decent amount of strawberry shampoo into my head.
It was when my eyes were closed, hair under the freezing spray that Sasori struck.
I felt something caress my shoulders, something cold, and hard, and I-
I screamed bloody murder, tripped over a bar of soap, fell against the shower curtain and landed on Sasori.
Naked and wet.
I pushed my pink hair from my face, and stared at Sasori who I had pinned down by my-
Well, you don't really want to know.
He was clutching his puppet, a particular cute panda to his chest, and his eyes seemed wide and unfocused.
"I wanted to show you my puppet." He explained. "I made if for you."
"That's nice." I replied, struggling to disentangle myself from the unmoving boy.
"Sakura." He said again with the utmost seriousness. "Why are you naked?"
It was just my luck that the rest of the household had decided to come up to check on me.
They burst in the door at the same time, and stared at me wordlessly.
Kakuzu broke the silence first. "Ah damn, Sakura did you break my comb?" I screeched like a pissed of tiger, and threw a bottle of shampoo at his head.
"God I didn't know you liked it rough." Hindan laughed, and it took Konan and a lot of me hitting and swearing to get the men to stop laughing and to leave.
Konan left me alone to get dressed, and I chose a simple pair of jeans and a t-shirt. With siblings liked mine it was easier to go simple.
It all really started with Tsunade. A famous doctor who couldn't have children, she had decided to adopt.
It started with just two, Konan and Pein, but before she knew it, there was Deidara, Hidan, Kisame, Kakuzu, Sasori, Itachi, Tobi, and Zetsu.
They moved into a bigger house, and Tsunade told them under no circumstances, no matter how lonely, bored, tired, pissed off, unhappy, or homesick they were, another child would not be adopted into the already crazy family.
And then, I came along.
I was about twelve, and I had run away from a foster home that hadn't treated me well, I was sporting a dozen bruises, I was tired, and cold, and I had fallen asleep in the boy's tree house.
It was Itachi that found me, and he brought Hidan, Konan, and Deidara out to look as well. I woke up to the sound of their voices.
"It's a girl." Konan said first. "Why are we looking at a girl?"
"She's hurt yeah." Deidara added. "Like a cute little kitten."
I opened my eyes, and I remembered the urge to run, to flee.
Itachi saw the look of panic in my eyes, saw the fear, as did the others, and like they were talking to a scared cat, they calmed me down with just a few soothing words.
"You're among family now."
Tsunade just couldn't say no to one more.
I wandered downstairs, grabbed my backpack, and we headed out the door with Hidan trying not to laugh at my pissed off expression.
You see my family was perfect.
I only had one problem with the whole set up,
I wasn't.
Chapter One end
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