Tess chuckled a bit as she read Tony's last email. She really should know better, and she did, but. . . That thought was interrupted by her cell phone. Tess was not surprised to see Pepper's number on the caller ID.

"Hey what's up?" she asked casually as she waited for the molten vitriol from the West Coast to pour into her ear.

"Only my hopes that someday we will be reunited," came Tony's voice in a seductive rumble. Tess gave an involuntary shiver. Damn he was good.

"Um, hey Pepper's Boss. Can I ask why you have Pepper's phone?"

"Oh I don't" came the gleeful voice on the other end, "I've just cloned her number. And her contact list."

"Wow. That's not extremely inappropriate or stalker like in any way," Tess said in a voice laden with sarcasm. "There is a term we use in the head shrinking biz. It's a useful and simple one. It's called boundaries. I suggest you look up the term before Pepper takes you apart with a can opener."

Tony's laugh was eager, "Well I won't tell her if you don't. Plus, see all that she hides from me? It's a bad habit that seems to be rubbing off on you Salts."

"Oh Tony," Tess said in her best suggestive purr, "I have so many bad habits."

"Hmmm."

"Wait," Tess said in a normal tone, "Did you just call me Salts?" A loud beep on her phone line announced another incoming call. "Hang on a sec Tony," she said cutting him off mid protest.

Not surprising, Pepper was on the other line. Ok time to nip this in the bud. After hitting a few buttons she connected all three of them.

"Hey Pep," Tess said in a calm tone.

"Tess why the hell. . ." Pepper was in a high temper indeed.

"Pepper?" Tony's surprise made his voice pitch slightly higher.

"Tony! Tess what the fu. . ." anger crackled in Pepper's voice.

Tess heaved a dramatic sigh. "Don't make me pull this car over, because I will. I can't help it that I am popular Pep. Tony called me."

"Probably to pump you for information," Pepper said in a deadly calm tone. "Wait, how did he get your cell number?"

"Umm," Tony sounded a tiny bit nervous.

Tess smiled to herself and said in a matter of fact tone, "I work for S.H.E. Pepper, they have all my contact info. There is this thing called a company directory." 'Ha, Tess thought to herself, your ass is mine Stark.

There was a moment of very tense silence.

"Soooooo aaaaanyway," Tess drawled. The silence was full of danger.

"Tony," Pepper sounded calm, and both Tess and Tony knew this was a warning sign. "Have you found your pen?"

"Uh, yeah," Tony was wary.

"Does it work?" the tone was all sweetness and light, but that light was a train barreling up the tracks.

"I think so," there was a faint scribbling sound heard over the line, "yeah it works."

"I am so glad. So there should be no complications on you applying said utensil to paper and writing your name. If you need help with the spelling I am sure Jarvis will be more than willing to help. You have five minutes. Starting now. And keep in mind it takes me less than two minutes to walk to your office. If I arrive and there is no ink on that paper," Pepper took a breath and her next words, while said in a professional tone with no malice evident, still radiated hell fire, "You pen will not be so easily found next time. As I will have to schedule you an appointment with a proctologist first."

There was a clunk as the phone hit the desk and both women heard frantic scribbling.

"Nicely done Pep," Tess said in a low tone. "Beautiful in its own horrifying way."

Pepper gave a small chuckle, then she became serious again. "I'm really sorry Tess. I don't know how he got your number."

Not as sorry as you'll be if he decides to drunk dial anyone on your contact list, Tess thought. Or as sorry as Tony will be if Pepper ever found out that he cloned her phone. But she said sincerely, "It's ok Pep. I don't mind."

"You don't now," Pepper said knowingly. "If it ever becomes a problem, let me know and I will handle it."

The way Pepper said 'handle it' made Tess think of sharp, pointy, stabby things. "It will be fine. And remember I am a mental health professional."

"Hm," Pepper said thoughtfully.

"You headed to his office?"

"Yup."

Over the phone Tess could hear Pepper's heel clicking, the sound of rustling papers, and Tony's, "Uh, hey. Looked all signed."

Tess laughed out loud at what she imaged Pepper's expression to be. They both must have heard her because after a second of what sounded like the scrabbling of plastic on a hard surface,

"What's so funny Salts?" Tony growled.

"Oh I am just expressing my joy at the wonders of the universe," Tess said trying to force back her snicker.

"Whatever," Tony said with a little sulk in his voice.

"Tess," Pepper's voice came back clearly over the line. "Two things. One," Pepper's voice held a note of genuine happiness and caring, "I am really happy about you and Smitty. I will be toasting you later tonight," she gave a small insinuating chuckle. "And two," now Pepper's tone was all sharp professionalism, "Tony has a meeting in twenty minutes, so he can't be on too long. You hear me Mr. Stark?"

"Yeah," grumbled Tony.

"I'll call you later Tess. Details. Oh and Tony, I warned you about playing with that neighbor girl. With all her wicked ways and bad influences. So I will be confiscating your Blackberry before the meeting." And with a laugh Pepper hung up.

"She can try," Tony mumbled petulantly. "Those meetings are so boring I can hear my brain cells die."

"You sure that it's not your liver screaming for mercy," Tess said dryly.

Tony gave a chuckle. "Both are probably true. Sooooooo," his tone was an audible leer, "Pepper has a tattoo you say?"

"I do say."

"And you have two already," Tony was thoughtful. "Why haven't I seen any of them?

"It is all about placement. One of mine is on my foot. But you had your hand on the other one when danced."

"Huh?" Tony sounded confused, "Where did," it dawned on him, "Oh. Hmm."

The silence hummed for a second while they both remembered there rather charged moment on the dance floor.

"Hips or spine?" Tony asked.

"Spine. Your thumb was right on it."

"I see. Why didn't you mention it at the time?" Tony's tone was slightly teasing, but there was also a current of intensity to the question.

"I was, hm, preoccupied," Tess said carefully. There was another humming silence.

"Where's Pepper's," Tony asked eagerly.

"If she hasn't shown you, then I won't tell," Tess said primly.

"Now that's not fair!"

"Nope."

"What are yours?" Tony asked trying not to sound too excited.

"The one on my foot, which is on my right big toe before you ask, is a winged foot."

"Like the Goodyear symbol?" Tony scoffed.

"Exactly. Actually it is the Goodyear symbol." Tess said nonchalantly.

"Why in the hell would you get that?" Tony asked incredulously.

"Because," Tess said matter of factly, "My Dad is from Akron, Ohio – where Goodyear was founded. And cause I thought it would help me run faster when I played soccer."

"Oh," Tony paused considering, "Makes sense I guess. You played soccer?"

"Varsity in college." Tess said with a hint of pride.

"Huh. Never figured you for a jock. What about the other one?" Tony was not one to be distracted when he wanted to know something.

"Celtic knot," Tess said casually.

"I see. Self-explanatory there Ms. Morton, not that the red hair wasn't a clue or anything." Tony chuckled. But he would not be deterred from his ultimate goal. "Was I right? Does Pepper have a butterfly tattoo?"

Tess scoffed. "Seriously? We were not sorority girls Mr. Stark," Tess chided good naturedly. "Give Ms. Potts some credit. It is very tasteful and well done."

"But what is it?" Tony was getting irritated at Tess's non-answer answers.

"You'll find out if she ever shows you."

"But. . .But." Tony whined, "why can't you tell me?"

"Because every woman has her secrets. And she has too much incriminating evidence." Tess replied easily.

"This will drive me crazy you know," Tony growled, "When I have a nervous breakdown I will make sure that they blame you."

"Don't blame me for your inability to ask the right question nicely," Tess said with a smirk in her voice. There was silence, and Tess could almost hear the gears in Tony's brain grinding.

"So," Tony said slowly, "Hypothetically speaking."

"I do enjoy the hypothetical."

"In theory."

"I also enjoy theories."

"You think if I asked nicely she'd show me?" There was a pleading hopefulness in Tony's voice.

"I think that if you ask nicely and in the right way," Tess trailed off.

"Yeah?"

"I think she probably, maybe, wouldn't murder you."

"No," Tony grumbled sourly, "she'd make it look like an accident."

"Yeah, got that right. Look Tony, I had better let you go, I don't want to face Pepper if I make you late for your meeting."

"Fine," Tony sighed melodramatically, "You're no fun anymore Tess."

Tess laughed. "That's cause I work for the government now."

"Well so do I and I still manage to have fun."

"That's cause you have all the cool toys."

"Hm. Your right I do." Tony said smugly.

"Hey Tony," Tess said in a serious tone, "You don't need to use Pepper's number to call me ok?"

"Oh." Tony sounded surprised. "Um ok. So?" Tony was confused.

"So," Tess said frankly, but kindly, "If you want to call me you can. Not that I am asking you too," Tess said quickly clarifying, "But if you did I would take the call. So no more cloning Pepper's phone ok?"

"Ok," Tony said with a laugh. "Thanks for covering for me on that one Tess."

"You so owe me for that one Stark." Tess gave an evil chuckle.

"Shit."

"Too right. Go be a billionaire now."

Tony gave a reluctant sigh, "If I have too."

"You do. And Tony?"

"Yes oh Salty sea dog?" Tony said with good natured humor.

Tess gave a laugh, then became a bit more somber. "Take care of yourself alright?"

There was a small pause. "I'll try. Bye Tess."

"Bye Tony."