Hey guuuyyyssss! /rolls around

*totally lazy right now* Anyways, this is a lighter oneshot that I couldn't get out of my head for some reason, so here it is! =P

It's kind of a crack fic… but not that you guys mind, right! …Right! H-Hahaha. Riiiight. Of cooourse! :'D This one's All27(well, I couldn't possibly do all, so I just did Tsuna's guardians / 3 \;;;), but of course, 1827 will be dominant at the end kekeke. This is set in TYL, sooo all characters are in lovely tuxedos aiming for Tsuna's vital regions!

…What

LOL anyways, without any further adieu, enjoy & review! =) (hey that rhymes! XD) Oh yeah, big thanks to Mem(xMemrC) for beta reading/giving me ideas for this CCCCx

"OF COURSE I CAN TOP!"

A certain brunet snarled at his home tutor, snorting in ridicule before stomping towards the exit of the conference room.

Every once in a blue moon, everyone had a habit of getting horny – not horny for just anyone, though, oh noooo – it was always for him, the Tenth boss of the prestigious Vongola Mafia, Sawada Tsunayoshi.

So when Tsuna had to actually walk around with his gloves on, in fucking Hyper Dying Will mode, stressed orange-caramel eyes glancing to and fro down the hallways before actually stepping out to move locations, Tsuna decided to give everyone the cold shoulder. Not just any cold shoulder would just drive these sex-driven beasts away, however. He had to be hardcore Ice Age status.

"JUUUUDAAAIMMEEE!"

The adoration just melted off of his Storm guardian's voice as it echoed down the hallways, as if the man was announcing his move on the precious Tenth before anyone else. The smoker literally skipped towards his boss in delight, arms spread wide as if he – oh, as if he expected Tsuna to hug him back. Not a chance, creeper.

'Wait a second, how did Gokudera-kun even know that I was about to step out of this room right this second? Talk about creepy…' Forcing a smile, Tsuna simply waved back at his so-called 'right-hand-man', laughing nervously when Gokudera actually hugged him without much thought. Tensing, Tsuna put his gloved hands against his Storm guardian's chest and pushed. You know, as in a 'get-the-hell-away-from-me' kind of push – but Gokudera-kun still doesn't get it.

"Oh my God, Juudaime! So like, this morning, the baseball idiot was looking for you, right? And I thought it was totally creepy because, he's, like, an idiot!" As the Storm guardian prattled on like a mother hen, gradually inching closer to his boss, Tsuna only pushed harder, lips pursed in to dismay as the Decimo glanced around, hoping for a distraction or some kind of emergency to happen to get away from this bundle of raging hormones. Sure, Gokudera was a good friend; reliable and all, but when things got out of hand with his … urges to "protect the Tenth", he tended to be a downright stalker.

So when Yamamoto turned the corner with his usual merry expression brightening at the sight of his two best friends, Tsuna thought he was saved. Thought.

"Hahaha! Hey guys, there you are! I've been looking all over the place for you especially, Tsuna!"

"Get the fuck away from Juudaime, you pedophile rapist! Why do you need to see the Tenth that bad anyways, you baseball idiot?"

Said boss sweat dropped nervously, glaring up at the heavens as he inhaled a deep breath when Gokudera wrapped a friendly arm around Tsuna's… waist. 'You're not one to talk, Gokudera-kun!'

"Um, haha, Gokudera, you're funny! We're the same damn age!" Yamamoto advanced closer with his usual smile, but there was a spark of tension and animosity in the air – Tsuna could feel it. Wait.

…Did Yamamoto just curse?

Bewildered orange eyes blinked up to his Rain guardian who was eyeing him with a rather creepy smile. Maybe Tsuna was being paranoid, but Yamamoto was looking at him in a very, very, very creepy way – oh. OHHH.

Realization clicking in his head, Tsuna mentally punched himself in the face before standing up straight to brush off Gokudera's hands with a sigh. Calmly ignoring his Storm guardian's kicked puppy expression; Tsuna strode past Yamamoto with a fixed gaze to the wall in front of him in order to ignore the intense gaze his Rain guardian was giving him.

"Guys, I have a lot of work to do – go find something to do other than bothering me for awhile unless it's an emergency, alrigh—" Tsuna spoke too soon, because to them, their uncontrollable hormones were an emergency that they wanted to take out on his poor ass. Well, that wasn't happening!

"B-But, Juudaimeeee—"

"NO, Gokudera-kun! And Yamamoto, stop eyeing my ass like it's some kind of delicacy!"

Huffing, the Decimo gave a final, warning glare that was seen as a tsundere-pout in both guardians' eyes before speeding down the hallway, sharply turning corners here and there in case the two creepers decided to follow him. When the Sky decided that the two had lost track of him, his hyper dying will subsided, eyes reverting to their innocent caramel state, even at the age of twenty-five. Slipping off his mittens, Tsuna leaned against a wall, exhaling deeply before noticing that the wall he was leaning against was warm. And breathing.

Abruptly swiveling around with cold sweat beading on his temples, Tsuna had the pleasure of meeting mismatched eyes just centimeters away from his face.

"MUKURO!"

Falling on his bottom from shock, Tsuna held his dear mittens to his erratically beating heart. The Mist guardian's signature chuckle floated into the now seemingly haunted air, his tone rather mischievous.

"My, my, Tsunayoshi-kun… Getting scared so early on in the evening? How cute," The illusionist cooed, tapping the fallen Decimo's nose with a slender gloved finger. Offering a hand, Mukuro leaned against his trident, amused.

When Tsuna took his offer with a small mumble of gratitude, Mukuro simply pulled the smaller man against his chest, spindly fingers resting on the Sky's tailbone suggestively.

"If you really want to thank me, you could always—"

Meanwhile, in the kitchen, a pineapple was very, very finely diced to be served as an afternoon snack to Lambo and Ipin.

When the blue moon rose high overhead, spilling its light into the Vongola Manor, Tsuna sighed in regret at his whole day wasted escaping a bunch of horny guardians. You know, if they would just get together and maybe solved their own problems together, no matter how creepy that sounds, he would actually get his work done and not get shot by Reborn all the time!

Why was it always him, anyways? What did he do that made every one of his guardians hunt after his chastity? Rubbing at his tired eyes, Tsuna dragged his feet towards his room, oblivious to the suspicious shadow leaning against his doors.

"Welcome back, Tsunayoshi."

A baritone voice greeted his return, and the tired Decimo wondered why his door was talking until he saw the familiar hungry glint of slate in the moonlight. Slumping against the nearest wall, Tsuna's lips quivered at the sight of his Cloud guardian poised with dignity at his door.

"H-Hiiiiieeeee…" Tsuna whimpered in defeat, swallowing hard against the lump in his throat. 'Oh god, I'm going to die; I'm going to get bitten to death!'

"G-G-Good evening, Hibari-san!" Tsuna began, awkwardly offering a tentative smile as he laughed nervously, glancing out the window towards the sky in attempts to escape the ex-prefect's all-too-powerful glare. "Beautiful m-moon tonight, huh? B-Boy, I'm tired – aren't you? We should go rest, and by rest, I mean I retire to my own room, and Hibari-san goes to your own room – oh Lord please don't hurt meeeACK!"

Silently, the Cloud had strode forward casually towards the shrinking, herbivorous Decimo, plucked him from the ground by the collar and tossed him over his shoulder, before turning towards Tsuna's room.

Relief washed upon Tsuna temporarily when he realized that Hibari-san hadn't changed directions to head for his Foundation. His Cloud guardian was probably drunk or something and being nice for once by taking him to his bed, right? Right. Tsuna didn't care if he was deceiving himself. He wanted to indulge in the remaining minutes; no, seconds of his purity left before being literally bitten to death...

But when Hibari showed no signs of violence, fear seemed to slowly dissipate from the spacious room when Hibari locked the grand double doors to the Decimo's room without breaking anything. The Cloud guardian then plopped down to sit onto the mattress with Tsuna gripped tightly in his arms, refusing to let go. There was a stretch of silence before the ex-prefect let out a long, quiet sigh, nuzzling the back of the Decimo's trembling neck affectionately.

The Cloud guardian's death-grip hug constricted tighter as Hibari tucked his body tighter against Tsuna's, his sharp chin resting in the midst of Tsuna's forest of auburn locks.

"I can't breeeaathhhee, Hibari-saaannn…" Tsuna squeaked, trying to get a glimpse of said former prefect's content expression by squirming about while gasping for air. The raven haired man snarled quietly at this and tightened his grip around Tsuna's waist even more, making the poor boy squawk in alarm, before leaning back onto the huge mattress to lie down, hold on the Decimo finally loosening. The released hostage twisted about before deciding to lie down next to the ex-prefect to rest his cheek on Hibari-san's heart to calm his own.

The atmosphere seemed to gradually lose its high as the blue moonlight cascaded over their tired forms; Hibari draping his arm over Tsuna's back casually while Tsuna curled up to Hibari's warmth. Burying his face into his Cloud guardian's familiar suit, Tsuna smiled sheepishly into the fabric as a blush settled onto his tan cheeks.

"I-I like being with you the most, Hibari-san," The Sky mumbled into the suit, hands fisting the material in embarrassment.

"I know." The Cloud's deep voice reverberated through Hibari's chest, clear and simple. The hand that once rested at Tsuna's waist now reached up to ruffle his herbivore's hair fondly as Hibari smirked to himself, mentally noting the statement to later subliminally brag to the other stupid herbivores. As calm silence stretched on lazily, Tsuna fidgeted a bit before quietly whispering,

"D-Do you like being with m-me, Hibari-san?"

Tsuna thought he heard his Cloud guardian chuckle before he was pulled to sit up in Hibari's lap again, the taller male's slate eyes impassive and hard to read. Before Tsuna could form some sort of coherent question, warm, pale lips seemed to meet his for a brief, chaste kiss before pulling back. Dazed, Tsuna blinked owlishly up at Hibari, mind blank.

"Does that answer your question, Tsunayoshi?"

This time, Tsuna's eyes brightened considerably when the corners of Hibari's pale lips turned upwards in a satisfied smirk. The Decimo nodded with a soft laugh, before leaning in to kiss his most beloved guardian once more, this time invitingly opening his lips to grant entrance. The ex-prefect did not have any complaints to this as he began to passionately, but slowly; kiss his Sky while gently flipping their positions to lay Tsuna down onto the mattress. Trailing affectionate kisses from the corners of his lips to his jugular, Tsuna closed his eyes as he sighed deeply, rigid muscles from tense situations throughout the day going lax as Hibari (for once) gently began to massage the cramped muscles while soothingly kissing his jaw.

Feeling like complete jello, Tsuna blinked drowsily up at Hibari's intense, almost hungry gaze before smiling softly – he had gradually learned to admire Hibari-san's gaze and had grown comfortable with its intensity. The ex-prefect took this as an OK sign to continue, and soundlessly unbuttoned the Sky's suit and dress shirt, exposing a well-trained abdomen littered with scars that Hibari was proud to look at to know that he had made that one.

Leaning down, Hibari started kissing and nipping Tsuna's collar bone before making his way down by trailing butterfly kisses down to his hip bone. Nipping the protruding hip bone rather sharply, Tsuna flinched before hissing in pain as he rubbed at the bite.

"What was that for, Hibari-san…" The small adult grumbled groggily, before turning to lay on his stomach. The Cloud only smiled infinitesimally before working on Tsuna's back, nibbling gently at the shoulder blades while his hands soothingly rubbed at the younger boy's back muscles. Content, Tsuna blinked his half-closed eyes before yawning quietly. "Mm…" The Decimo mumbled pleasantly, before reaching back to grab and pull the Cloud guardian into another long, drawled out, rather sloppy kiss. Their noses bumped clumsily as Hibari closed his eyes in drowse as well; meshing lips together as they slowly pulled away, breaths slightly heavy. Tsuna began to grin childishly before slowly drifting off to sleep in Hibari's arms, while the former prefect of Namimori stifled a yawn before loosening his tie, suit jacket already ditched on the floor. Kissing his herbivorous Sky's closed eyelids with love, Hibari gave a final nip to the Decimo's nose before nodding off to sleep with Tsuna's head tucked under his chin.

Once in a blue moon, most of Sawada Tsunayoshi's guardians became monstrously horny for him –

But if once in awhile, if it meant Tsuna could just have some peace time with Hibari-san, then, well, maybe it was all worth it.

Meanwhile, on the roof tops of the Vongola Manor, a certain cursed Arcobaleno sipped his wine with a sly smile as he tipped his fedora forward to shadow his eyes from the bright moon.

"No you can't, Dame-Tsuna, no you can't."

END!~ How was it? Writing the end made me drowsy as well, LOL! XD

This took awhile to finish because of school, so there may be some obvious mistakes here and there. XP

Thanks for reading, and reviews would be a delight!~