I don't own any characters, blah blah blah, must we always say that? Probably not... I'll shut up now.

Could call this slash, if you squint and look hard. Not intended to be that way, honest.

Spock watched as the young James T. Kirk and Montgomery Scott both vanished from the transporter pad. He hoped he hadn't made a mistake about showing Scott the equation for transwarp beaming well before he would come up with the equation himself; Spock couldn't recall the exact date.

'The timeline is already damaged;' Spock told himself. 'One more change won't hurt it at this point.'

He looked at little Keenser, who was gazing sadly at the transporter pad. Spock shook his head, and turned away. He had to get out of this room. He wanted to be alone.

Emotions he had long since locked away began to surface again. To see Jim Kirk, alive and well… even if this Jim Kirk wasn't his Jim Kirk. This one was so young, clearly thrust into something he wasn't ready for. Spock had accessed Kirk's mind during the meld, and had been surprised at how different this Kirk was. His father was dead, his brother had left home, he was abused as a child; this Kirk had gone through a rough life.

"You're not coming?" Kirk's voice asked again in his mind.

Oh how Spock had wanted to say yes, yes he was coming with Kirk and Scott back to the Enterprise! The chance to see the Enterprise, the real Enterprise, the one he served on for so many years, and, as illogical as it sounded, had come to love; the chance to see her again was something Spock had only dreamed of. He recalled seeing the large red fireball race across the sky of the Genesis Planet; the hull section burning up in he atmosphere. The USS Enterprise went down in a blaze of glory, dying in the way she was meant to die: in the line of duty. The thought of the Enterprise sailing through space once more intact… it was almost too much.

Yet this was a different Enterprise, not his. Everything was different now, everything Spock remembered, everything he knew, was gone… or very changed.

There was the crew. Were they all so different than the ones he remembered? Scott wasn't on the Enterprise in this reality, unlike his reality where Scott was an Engineering Lieutenant by now. The man obviously still loved his scotch, and sandwiches, though. Some things would never change.

What about Uhura? Was she at the Communications Station, waiting for incoming messages? Spock thought of how they once were together… were they together in this reality? He had managed to catch an image of her from Kirk's mind; she was just as lovely as he remembered.

What about Sulu, and Chekov? Were they sitting at the helm and navigation respectively? Did Chekov still make incorrect historical references about Russia? Did Sulu still practice fencing?

Dr. McCoy; what about him? No doubt the doctor would argue with the younger Spock just as much as Spock Prime had argued with the other McCoy. Spock quietly admitted to himself that he missed the bickering between him and the doctor, just as much as he missed McCoy. Dr. McCoy had passed away a few years earlier in the future.

And what of his younger self? His younger self was probably going through the same turmoil of emotions as he was. After all, his, their, planet no longer existed. Nero had taken his revenge, but had taken revenge on an innocent Spock, one who knew nothing of what had happened in the future. Those emotions were the key for Kirk to take control of the Enterprise, but Spock felt sorry for his younger self, and what Kirk would do to him. If the old Kirk had ever tried something like that on Spock… Spock shook his head, unsure of the real outcome at this point.

And James Kirk… to see him again… Spock had never realized how much he missed his old friend. And now, he had sent him off to what could be his death.

Spock slammed his fist against the wall. He should have gone with them! They have no idea what they are up against! The Enterprise didn't stand a chance against the Narada. Even the Enterprise-E wouldn't stand a chance against the Narada! He could help them, and the chance to be aboard the Enterprise one last time, to walk along her halls, to stand on the Bridge…

…To command her.

"No;" Spock told himself. "You have made the logical choice." But was it the right one? Only time would tell.

The Vulcan continued along the hallway, struggling to control his emotions. 'That's the problem with getting old;' he thought. 'Your control weakens.' Finally, he gave in. Spock collapsed against the wall and sank to the ground as the emotions spilled over in his mind. It was all too much for him.

To be trapped in a past that wasn't the one he knew…

To know that he, in part, changed history and couldn't correct it…

To see his planet destroyed…

To here the billions of minds cry out in that final second…

To see an old friend who was long dead in his time…

And all of it was his fault; one way or another.

Spock did something he hadn't done in years, something he once believed he had forgotten how to do.

Spock cried.