Disclaimer: Nope, they are not mine, but the story is . 'The Good Wife' is the property of CBS, but they probably don't mind if I borrow them for a bit.

It's a process

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At night she would lie in bed, thinking of what she had. She had the perfect life. Everyone always kept telling her had a great husband. He was someone she could rely on, who took care of her. He made romantic gestures, helped her with the kids, gave her everything she could possibly want. A hard working man. She had two fantastic kids and a beautiful house. She had everything everyone could ever want. Heck, she had everything she could ever want. Still ,she couldn't get her mind away from that one thought. O yes, she would push it away. Every time she would push it far away to the back of her mind and fill it with thoughts of what she had. She was married , happily married. She was happy.

At night she would lie in bed, remembering who she was. She should leave him. She would be fine. She would come out of this crisis stronger. She had great kids, a new job she loved. But he was deeply sorry. He loved her so much he would do anything in the world to make it right. If he could he would take it all back. And she loved him; she had loved him for most of her adult life. But right now she hated him. No, maybe it wasn't hate, she resented him. She resented him for all the pain he caused , the embarrassment she had to live with. The embarrassment their kids had to live with. She was disappointed in him. He hurt her. She knew some how she would make it through this, they would make it though all of this. Although right now she didn't know how. So, once in a while she would let her mind wonder off. She thought about how it would be to feel his arms around her, holding her, his lips on her, kissing that soft spot on her neck just below her ear. How she would run her hands over his muscular arms. She would think about what could have been if she hadn't married Peter. But she had. And despite of everything, she had once loved him. She did love him. And so she stayed

At night she would lie in bed, wondering what she should do. She was a strong woman. She knew what she should do. It was the decent thing to do. The good thing to do. Her kids needed her and he did to. She cared for him. She would always care for him. Peter was as much part of her life as she herself was. But ever since that day, the day he kissed her. The day she'd seen the raw emotion on his face, the lust and the love in his eyes. His eyes where begging her, pleading to let him in, to let him love her. Ever since that day she had been wondering. But she cared for him, he needed her and she needed to be there for him. And so she stayed.

At night she would lie in bed, dreaming of what should have been. She wouldn't be alone. She had a husband, kids. They would take care of her. She had her family. That is the most important thing. He wouldn't even talk to her anymore. At least not the way he used to. They would talk of course, about the case, about what they had for lunch. He didn't look at her in that special way anymore, like he knew exactly what she was thinking. So she started dreaming of what could have been. She would be lying in his bed, the feeling of the soft sheets shifting against her skin as he pulled her close and kissed her. She would look up and see the love in his eyes, the strength, the assurance that they could make it, that they could go on where she and Peter should have given up. Once she told him forever and he promised her. His promise had meant nothing and she resented him everyday a little more for it. She cared for him. Yes, she couldn't deny that But she didn't love him. And so she packed a bag left him a note and left.

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A/N: I'm not a native English speaker so sorry for the grammar (or other) mistakes but I don't have a beta. This is my first "The good wife" fic. So please be nice…Let me know what you think and if I should continue. Could be a one-shot but could also be the beginning of something more. I haven't decided yet.