IMPORTANT STUFF TO KNOW!

This is a crack/romance/humor/ adventure fic

Pairing: SasukeXOc(Ren)

Summary: WTF just happened? One minute I'm at Wendy's eating a frosty then everything gets blurry and I start hearing the Japanese song ROCKS by Hound Dog! Next thing I knew I was in some apartment with a balcony that had a view of the hokage monument with a guide called 'The Guide to being Ren Roax, the fourth member of Team 7' …WHAT THE HELL?

Warnings: Ren POV almost all the time, Sakura/Ino bashing (mostly Sakura), attempt at humor

Disclaimer: I don't own squat TT^TT

"talking"

'thinking'

""people talking at the same time""

INNER SAKURA:

Dedicated to ILOVEANIME123, my 200th reviewer

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Aw Yeah! Time for the chunin exams. This is going to be totally bad ass. Like, for real.

As I continue to walk to…my destination, I see Sakura just standing there fidgeting and looking all worthless like a dope.

…Wait a flip flopping minute…oh glob, she's STILL feeling bad for herself because Sasuke said she was a worse ninja than Naruto. WHICH SHE IS!

Siiiiigh. I guess I'll help her. I don't want to but if we're down each other's throat the entire time, we're all gonna die. I slowly trudge over to her. This is going to be more painful then a root canal. And I've had one of those right before Christmas, they freaking suck.

"Hey Sakura." I say in a irritated voice.

She looked over at me shocked at first then glared. "Wha-?!"

"Shut up. Do NOT talk till I'm done spewing more words." I interrupt her with a deadly look on my face. She stays quiet when she sees my eyes turn red.

"Look, I know that we…well…hate each other, but since you and I are on the same team I say we make a truce during the chunin exam. Cause if we wanna pass we can't be trying to kill each other at the same time…and we're BOTH pretty strong so we should help each other along with Naruto and Sasuke…so…truce?" Ugh. So nasty. Its like that sympathy for the devil stuff.

She thinks for a moment then nods and we shake hands on it. Wee. We walk to the academy in silence. I could tell by the look on her face she was thinking "this is so awkward!" but do I care? Not at all. We see the guys at the entrance.

"What is up you little tarts!" I say grinning. They sweat dropped. I don't even know why I said that.

As we entered the Academy and that whole bit wherethe guards are blocking the door because of the genjutsu thingy and sasuke acted all bad ass after and sakura gained confidence because sasuke praised her.

I start hanging on Sasuke like a little kid. "Sasuke-why did you do that? Now she thinks you like her~" he lets out a sigh but smirks at my antics. Yes! I am growing on him! Soon I will control all the bishonen in this goddamn series! A boy walks up Sasuke and me technically since I'm hanging on him. Oh Christ, its Neji Hyuuga. Freaking hate that Nazi.

By the way Nazis=bad. XD

"Hey you. Whats your name?" Neji asked.

Sasuke glared at him. "Its common for people to introduce their self first."

Oh my god not this chiz again.

The hyuuga ignored the rudeness."Hey your a Rookie aren't you? How old are you?"

Pedo-bear.

"Thats none of your business."

"What was that?"

Crap, shits going to go down. I shall interfere!

"You're from the Hyuuga clan, right?" Nice Ren. Why don't you point out that the sky is blue or that an apple is a fruit.

Neji smirks at me. "You're pretty smart. Tell me, who are you."

Seriously?! He's easily impressed. "Not really but I-"

Sasuke covered my mouth with his hand. "Like I said. Its common for people for people to introduce them self first." HIS HANDS ARE SO CLAMY!

Okay I'm bored of this little conversation I'm going to Subway…crap I can't…meatball sandwich…

"Come on guys, lets go." Sakura finally said something smart!

And we walked away. On our way to room 301 I got lost cause I had to pee. Curse my tiny bladder and ended up by myself.

"NARUUUUTO! SAAAASUKE! SAAAKURA! Where are you tatter tots?!"

I searched around the building for my team until I heard someone fighting in the next room. I looked in the room and saw Naruto dead on the ground and Sasuke totally beaten in Sakura's lap and Rock lee standing there like a putts.

Damn it all. I sighed. "Oh to the my god. What the hell are you guys doing. I can't even go to the bathroom without you morons screwing up. And speaking of morons; Naruto get up man. You're embarrassing yourself man. Freaking useless ass dork."

Oh yeah I'm pissed. I hate pointless fighting unless its on TV.

I look at Sasuke and Sakura with a changed look on my face. I smiley sweetly at them.

"GET THE HELL UP OR ELSE I'LL RIP OUT YOUR INTESTINES AND PLAY DOUBLE DUTCH WITH THEM.(HEART)"

Sasuke, Sakura and Naruto all stood next to each other completely scared.

We were about to leave until a freaking tortoise appears in front of Lee.

"Whoa look! A talking turtle!" Naruto gasped.

"It's a tortoise and we don't have time for it no matter how cool it is."

A man thenappears ontop of the turtle. He was posing in a weird way and he had just as bushy eyebrows as RockLee did. I knew who he was. He was MightGuy.

MightGuy shouted "Hello everybody!"

We all screamed in unison. This guy was freaking BANANAS!

"Hes got bushier eyebrows than RockLee!" Naruto screamed.

"Do not insult Guy-Sensei! He is the best sensei ever!" RockLee obviously said that.

Can we go now.

RockLee is then punched by MightGuy. HOLY PEANUT BUTTER CUPS! CHILD ABUSE!

MightGuy looked at him with tears in his eyes. "Now that you learned your lesson...oh Lee! I'm so sorry!"

RockLee cried as well. "Oh Guy-Sensei!"

Their eyes began to water up and they hugged.

MightGuy stood up in a superman pose, still crying. "Let us run into the sunset with the power of youth!"

I can never unsee what I just saw. "hey." I said to my scarred for life teammates. They looked back at me. "Let's. Leave." We all nodded.

MightyGuy suddenly popped up behind us. "Hey!"

Sakura,Naruto and I screamed in terror running away as I dragged Sasuke by the collar as he died a little inside, from one of the most weirdest things we've ever seen.

"Kakashi what are you doing here?" I said as I some how found myself in front of a door.

"Glad you made it Sakura." Dude he just ignored me!

Sakura looked surprised. "What do you mean Sensei?"

Kakashi-Only groups of three can enter here, but in this case, all 4 of you.

"So if I didn't come here-"

C'mon we went over this exact same thing when we first became a ninja team.

Kakashi smiled beneath the mask. "Yes. The guys and Naruko wouldn't have been able to go any farther. But I'm glad you did come . . I'm proud of you guys. Good Luck."

We then opened the doors and entered the room.

Sakura gasped "So this is the Chunin Exams..."

Well yeah, that's the whole goddamn reason we're here…Woah

TBC

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