Well, another foray into the M-rated universe. And another belated birthday gift for DaniWilder…though this time I'm only a few weeks late instead of a months. Happy Birthday.
It's not where I wanted it to go, but to be honest, this was as close as I could get. It's more or less based around my "Unspoken" fic and the way Rodney and Jennifer communicate with looks and body language.
MGM owns SGA…I don't.
Haven't bugged anyone to beta, so all boo boos are my bad.
Rodney was just about to put the miniature crystal into its bracket. It was a delicate procedure, made nearly impossible by the fact that the delicate crystal itself was only the size of his thumbnail. The situation was further compounded by the device in which he was trying to implant the crystal, a round object the size of a basketball with an access port the size of a baseball. He'd had to design and fabricate a special set of tongs to do the job. It was a clumsy device which made a touchy procedure even more delicate, but it was the best he could come up with. Not for the first time that day he promised himself with his next project he wouldn't let excitement get the better of him.
Or distraction.
Easy, Rodney, he told himself as he slowly eased the crystal into the spherical opening.
He'd been working on the device almost non-stop for five days. If the forty-seven computer simulations he ran were to be believed, this little device would be a portable transporter with a range of, well, he wasn't sure. Some models gave him two hundred kilometers while others gave him fifty. Either way, it would be a kickass thing to have if hungry Wraith were bearing down on you.
The crystal was a couple of inches inside the device when Rodney felt the first trickle of sweat on his brow. Another inch and he would have to tilt the probe like tongs to the left. The room to maneuver was so miniscule that he wasn't sure if it was even possible. And the damn crystal had to be the last component to be installed. As it was, he had to slip the crystal in place, then remove the tongs and secure the cover plate within thirty seconds or the power wash would fry the crystal. Of course, he could just as easily do that if the crystal touched either of the three active power nodes that was surrounding the saddle. If the crystal so much as grazed either of them it would be useless and he'd have to make a new one, which was pain in the ass.
Damn Ancient crystal technology.
"Gently, Rodney," he whispered as he guided the crystal towards its new home. "Gently."
"Rodney!"
Rodney jumped at the unexpected and, given the relatively small room he was in, unnecessarily loud summons, which naturally caused his hand to jerk forward. His stomach lurched when he heard the chime like sound that told him the crystal had hit one of the power nodes and died a useless death.
"Damn it!" he yelled as he withdrew the crystal from the gizmo. He threw the now useless crystal onto the table, tongs and all, with enough force to send both scraping across the width of the table. They went over the edge and clattered softly when they hit the floor a moment later.
He turned towards the door with white hot anger and murderous intent in his eyes. "Damn it, damn it, damn it!" He charged towards the man who had just cost him so much work and trouble and stopped only a few inches away from him. He turned back towards the would be portable transporter enough to point to it, but kept his angry gaze on Sheppard. "Do you know how long I've been working on that thing? No of course you don't," he said, not giving Sheppard the chance to respond to the question. He drew his arm to him and faced Sheppard directly. "How would you know how much work I do?" Sheppard opened his mouth but Rodney went on. "Didn't you see the damn big red light by the door, right under the huge sign that says 'Absolutely no entry when light is on'. Hmmn? No? Well maybe you should get your eyes checked when you get your ass out of here! Which is now!"
He moved to turn away from Sheppard and begin the long, tedious work of fabricating a new crystal when John's right hand shot out to grab his arm to keep him still.
It was then that he noticed the severe look on John's face.
"What?" demanded Rodney, though his voice held none of the venom it had a moment ago. "What is it?"
John took a deep breath. "Jennifer is back from M7G-677." John stumbled to find the right words. "The disease…"
"What's the total?" asked Rodney softly. Jennifer had gone to M7G-677 five days ago after the kids had called to say there was a sickness going around six of the twelve villages. An hour after going, Jennifer had called back asking for Hazmat gear, portable quarantine units and extra staff. Yesterday she'd called to say the disease had seemed to run its course and the kids were on the mend. Most of them, that is. Some didn't make it.
"Fourteen," replied Sheppard, sorrow and a sense of helplessness making his voice lower than usual. "We still don't know what it was. It hit fast and hard, then left just as quickly. Keras mentioned something in their old stories about an illness that killed without mercy, but it hadn't happened in a very long time. Jennifer and most of her people came back a few minutes ago. She didn't say anything, she just…" He trailed off and gave Rodney a small shrug.
Rodney pushed past Sheppard and entered the main lab, the crystal and the portable transporter forgotten amid thoughts of Jennifer and the hell she must have gone through for nearly a week. He breezed through the lab, ignoring the three attempts by his staff to get his attention and deciding as he moved where he'd go first to find her.
He'd been worried about her since she'd called back to tell them about the first deaths. She'd told them what was happening with the kids, her voice professional and everything you'd expect to hear from a seasoned doctor in a crisis situation. But because it had been an audio and visual transmission, he'd been able to see the truth.
Sheppard, Woolsey and Rodney gathered around the monitor as Jennifer moved into the camera's field of vision. She looked tired, and the orange hazmat suit was a stark reminder as to why.
Rodney's eyes connected with hers. He shifted a bit on his feet as though he wanted to jump through the screen to get to her.
She noticed and her eyes softened ever so slightly. "I'm okay," she told him through that simple gesture, though he didn't believe it for a minute.
She reported on what was happening in the villages, her eyes darting towards his several times as she spoke, seeking comfort and trying to reassure him at the same time.
"Very well, Doctor," Woolsey said when she finished her report. "Do what you can and be careful."
'Yes, sir,' she replied, though she was looking directly at Rodney again.
His eyes narrowed a little. "Be careful."
Jennifer rolled her eyes, trying to be playful with the action. She knew she'd failed when Rodney's eyes narrowed a little more. She nodded and returned his smile. "I will." Her eyes sparkled brightly despite the situation. "I love you."
Rodney returned her smile. "I love you, too."
"Your next check in will be in six hours, Doctor," said Woolsey, oblivious to the silent communication. Of all the people that spent time with Rodney and Jennifer, only Sheppard and Teyla had been observant enough to catch it, and even they didn't pick up on it every time.
Jennifer nodded to Woolsey and gave Rodney one more fleeting yet reassuring glance before reaching down to cut the communication.
Rodney entered the glorified closet that was the transporter and pressed the destination screen on the luminescent panel. A moment later the door slid open to reveal the residential level. He stepped out into the hallway and turned left to head towards Jennifer's quarters.
Of the many times she'd reported back to Atlantis after that first call, each and every one of them had been audio only transmissions. Part of him said that it was because she didn't want to lose valuable time going back and forth to the Jumper to use the video comm. unit, but another part of him knew it was for a different reason: she didn't want him to see just how badly it was affecting her. She didn't want him to worry about her.
He shook his head at that thought as he neared her door. If it hadn't been for the portable transporter- and the plethora of mundane issues that popped up- keeping his mind occupied, he would have been worried sick and bouncing off the walls.
He passed his hand over the door sensor, and frowned when it wouldn't open as it should have. He tried again, and when the same result occurred he pried the panel off and worked his magic. A second later the door obediently slid open.
The first thing he noticed when he stepped inside was the darkness. He brought the lights up a little at first, just in case she was in bed, then all the way when he saw that she wasn't there. Once the lights were on, however, he saw something interesting on the floor: a trail of clothes leading towards the bathroom. He walked along the line of discarded garments- her shoes were only a foot inside the door, then her socks, and her jacket, duty shirt, her pants, her black panties and, next to the door to the bathroom, her bra.
He sighed and hesitated before opening the door. Knowing Jennifer as well as he did, she'd kept everything together to get the job done. She'd pushed all the feelings of sorrow and frustration aside, knowing she'd be able to deal with it all once she got back home to Atlantis.
And that scared him. Despite everything they'd been through, despite as well as they knew each other, despite how much he loved her, he still wasn't sure he knew how to help her.
Just be there for me.
Jennifer's words rang out in his mind, the ones she'd spoken to him months ago after one of her staff- a good friend- died in a freak off world accident. He'd said then how he didn't know how to help her get through that loss; that he didn't know what she needed. She'd smiled and cuddled into him and said, "Just be there for me."
That's what he did and the rest just fell into place.
Just be there for me.
He gave his head a gentle shake and everything appeared clearer to him. It was as if a switch had been thrown within him. Jennifer was hurting and she needed him. He wasn't sure being there would be enough, but it was a start and it had to happen right now.
He opened the door and walked into the bathroom. The door slid shut behind him, but he didn't notice. He didn't notice anything except the woman he loved, and it filled his chest with pain and sympathy.
She was in the shower sitting on the floor with her back against the wall opposite the one that held the faucet and shower nozzle, shrouded in a thin blanket of steam. She had her legs drawn tight to her chest, her arms flung around them just below her knees in a hug so tight that Rodney could see her arms straining from where he was. Despite the fact that the spray from the shower nozzle was harmlessly hitting the floor just in front of Jennifer's feet, droplets of water covered her body. The exception was her hair- it was dry except for the tips of the longer strands that managed to find and absorb moisture where it touched other parts of her body when she'd bowed her head down towards her knees.
He slowly walked towards her without speaking or making any noise for fear of frightening her. As he got closer he noticed her eyes were wide open and blankly looking straight at the floor.
His confidence faltered long enough to think about running out and calling Teyla or someone to come and help Jennifer, but the thought was fleeting and immediately replaced by a burning need and desire to comfort her.
He gave it a moment of thought and decided that the first thing that needed to be done was to let her know she wasn't alone.
Rodney knelt down beside Jennifer and slowly reached his left hand towards her shoulder. She didn't move a muscle when his fingertips finally touched the damp skin of her shoulder. Her skin was cold despite the hot water coming from the nozzle and the warm steam permeating the bathroom. He flattened his hand against the top of her shoulder and began rubbing from her shoulder in towards her neck and back out again. He was rewarded after a few strokes when she slowly turned her head towards him.
Her eyes were vacant and dull, completely void of their usual radiance and beauty. "Hey," he whispered when they finally focused on his.
For a long agonizing second nothing happened. They both stayed perfectly still as he waited for her too do something…anything. Then it happened.
A spark, tiny and not too bright but a spark nonetheless, appeared in her eyes.
Rodney slid his hand along her shoulder and up the side of her neck and onto her cheek.
"Rodney," she said with a gentle nuzzle of her cheek against the palm of his hand. Her pale lips curved slightly upward in a small and incomplete smile that lasted only a few seconds before turning into a deep frown. She looked past him and then around the bathroom as if only just then realizing where she was.
"How did I get here?" her knitted brow and look of shock asked.
Rodney gently shook his head as if to say, "Doesn't matter." His thumb caressed her cheek. "You're home and that's what matters."
Jennifer sighed and gave him another frail smile, agreeing with the sentiment entirely. She shivered and gave Rodney an embarrassed look to which he only smiled.
He withdrew his hand from her cheek and stood up next to her. He looked down at the incredible woman he'd managed to find in spite of himself, and reached his hands out for her to take. He was still alarmed at how cold her skin was when she put her hands in his. He helped her to stand up, careful to keep her footing stable on the wet floor.
A miniscule part of his brain, the tiny yet potent part of his male genetic code geared towards sex ecstatically registered that Jennifer was standing before him naked. The rest of him, the ninety-nine point nine percent of him whose only reason for existence at that moment was to help Jennifer, thoroughly trounced his libido to within an inch of its life and warned it not to surface again.
Rodney found Jennifer's eyes again, relieved to see them a little more back to normal than they had been.
"I...I need to…" She motioned to the spray of water with a small nod of her head.
Rodney nodded, but before letting go of her hands his eyes asked, "Are you sure you're going to be okay?"
"I'm okay," said her grateful smile and resolute nod. She brought his right hand up to her mouth and kissed his thumb. She kept it pressed against her lips and her raised brows asked, "Wait for me?"
"I'm not going anywhere," he said by bringing her free hand up to his lips and kissing it as she had done with his. He held it for another second and let her go. She released his hand as well and he turned to head towards the door. He looked back as the door slid open to see Jennifer easing herself underneath the spray of water.
He stopped and Jennifer looked at him. She nodded and threw him a look of mock annoyance for good measure, to which he rolled his eyes. He turned around and walked out into her room and wondered what to do next.
"Make it easy for her," he mumbled into the empty room. He made his way over to her dresser, sparing a glance at the clock to see that it was almost eighteen hundred hours, and sighed.
I wonder if she's hungry? he thought as he opened the top drawer of her dresser. He picked out a pair of underwear and matching bra, mildly amused to discover that the erotic part of himself failed to comment on the situation, and placed it on top of the dresser next to the picture of him and Jennifer on the East Pier. After closing the drawer again, he stopped.
What now? Thoughts were running through his mind at light speed. Does she want something to eat? If she does, do we go to the Mess or should I go get something and bring it back? If she doesn't, what does she want to wear? Should I take out sweats, pajamas or something else?
His eyes found the picture again. In it he had his right arm around her shoulders and she was cuddled into him and they both had abnormally large smiles on their faces. They were on the East Pier celebrating…what? Someone's birthday? It didn't matter. All that mattered was the carefree look on Jennifer's beautiful face, the antithesis of the way she looked moments ago. All that really mattered was that she find that look again.
He sighed and reached down to open the second drawer when Jennifer's arms wrapping around his waist from behind stopped him. He put his hands on top of hers as she cuddled into him, trying desperately as he did to think of something to say.
He didn't have to.
"Thank you for staying." Her voice was so soft he'd barely heard it.
Rodney tried to turn within her embrace to face her, and after a moment she loosened her hug enough to allow him, tightening it again when she could cuddle against his chest.
He hugged her back, his hands coming to rest on her upper back though they were separated from her skin by the fluffy white towel she'd wrapped herself in. "Told you I wasn't going anywhere." He waited a heartbeat and asked, "Are you hungry? We can go to the Mess, or I can go get you something." When Jennifer shook her head against his body he said, "Then we should get you dressed before you catch a cold or something and things get..." He was going to say worse, but the way she held him made it clear it couldn't get much worse.
Jennifer didn't move away. Instead her arms tightened their already vise like grip around his waist. Rodney started moving his hands randomly about her back in response, waiting for her to make the next move.
It didn't take long.
He felt the wetness leeching through his shirt and onto his chest only a second before the first shudder came. He held her tight and kissed the hair on the top of her head as her tears flowed freely onto him and her body released days of pent up frustration, anger and grief in the form of deep, sob-induced tremors.
There was a time, he reflected absently, that dealing with this sort of thing would have been beyond him. There was a time really not that long ago that he would have bolted from the room at the first sign of tears. That was before he'd become a better man with the help of the woman crying in his arms. The strength of his embrace didn't falter as she let the emotions she'd been burying within herself for days dissipate. He would hold on all night if he had to.
"You did everything you could, Jennifer," he said soothingly and with as much genuineness as he had ever said anything before.
In between her wrenching sobs she managed to say into his chest, "Just…children…"
Rodney kissed the top of her head again and kept his lips to her damp hair as he spoke. "It's okay," he said, completely aware that it was anything but okay. "Shhh. It's going to be okay."
He was prepared to keep repeating those words for a while, but before he knew it her quivering began to lessen in frequency and strength, and Jennifer's breathing slowly made its way back to normal.
Finally, Jennifer's arms relaxed and she loosened her hold on him, though she didn't let go, and her head moved off his chest and back far enough for her to look up at him.
"Thank you," she whispered with a hoarse voice as her moist, reddened eyes bored into his. "I…I really needed that."
"Do you want to talk about it?" he asked quietly. "You know, because you should. It helps…they say it helps to talk about it." It hadn't been his experience really, to feel better after talking about something that bothered him…at least not until he'd started sharing those things with her.
She closed her eyes and shook her head. "Not now," she said when she opened her eyes. "I just…maybe later?"
"Okay," he said with a gentle squeeze and nod of his head. He slid his hands down Jennifer's back, and when they reached the bottom of her ribcage he drew them forward until his hands rested on the tops of her hips. Jennifer let go of him completely and moved her hands up to rest on Rodney's chest.
Rodney stepped to his left, keeping his left hand on her waist as he did so, to give her access to her dresser. He nodded to it to say, "You should get dressed."
Jennifer briefly looked at her dresser then turned to face Rodney. She stepped towards him so they were face to face and close together once more. Her hands moved up onto his chest again, only this time instead resting there they moved up his chest and up along either side of his neck and onto his cheeks.
Jennifer's lips parted but she couldn't speak, so her eyes did what they had done so many times before and said to him what her mouth could not. "I love you."
Before Rodney could reciprocate Jennifer gently pulled him towards her until her lips met his. For an instant their eyes remained open after their lips touched, and Rodney saw a spark of something in those beautiful brown orbs, but then they closed and so did his.
She kept the kiss gentle- loving and sweet and incredible- and Rodney willingly followed her lead. She languidly ended the kiss after a while and rested her forehead against his.
Rodney gave her some time then eased back from her so he could see her face. Her cheeks were a rosy color and her eyes were still not quite right, though there was a marked improvement. He was about to suggest again she get dressed when her hands slid down his neck and onto his chest again.
His eyes kept focused on her eyes which were following her hands as they moved down along his chest and onto his sides, then slide back up onto his chest. She did the same movement again, except this time when her hands came back up onto his chest they moved farther upward to his shoulders, then back down onto his chest.
And with each movement he could see a little bit more of the Jennifer he knew and loved coming back into her eyes.
He was so intent on her eyes that he nearly jumped when they abruptly shot up to look into his eyes. Her gaze remained fixed upon his eyes as her hands slipped up onto his shoulders again and then slid down his arms until her hands held his.
He was so surprised a second later when Jennifer stepped back and pulled him along with her that he nearly stumbled into her. He managed to keep his feet and she guided them back until they were at her bed.
Warning bells sounded in Rodney's mind as he realized what Jennifer was trying to do. Despite the fact that he desperately wanted to take her in his arms and make love to her, he gently shook his hands from her grasp and took a step back from her. He took a deep breath and let it out. They'd been together for nearly a year, lovers for months, since that incredible night after watching that movie she liked so much. But still, he didn't feel right about it with Jennifer so…not herself?
He studied her for a moment, standing beside her bed cocooned in her fluffy white towel and nothing else, her damp hair hanging about her face and cascading down onto her shoulders. She brought her arms up and hugged herself and he could see her drifting away again.
"Jennifer..."
Jennifer shivered briefly and violently, shaking her head which sent tiny droplets of water flying off her hair onto her bed and the floor. "I've spent the last four days surrounded by sickness and death, Rodney," she said as she rubbed her arms as if she were trying to ward off a chill. "Sickness, and death, and anger, and a feeling of complete uselessness that I hadn't felt since…," her eyes moistened as the painful memories surfaced, "…since I couldn't figure out how to save you from the second childhood." A single tear slipped from her eye and started sliding down her cheek. She wiped it away with her right hand and went back to hugging herself. "Pretty much everything I've felt for four days has been horrible." Another tear escaped her eyes and succumbed to gravity's will. She ignored it. "I need to feel something good, Rodney. I need to feel something better; something beautiful to replace the sadness." Her tear-filled eyes added a silent, "I need you."
Rodney's thoughts and reservations evaporated as his bruised desire stormed out of its sanctuary and joined forces with the rest of his body and soul to act. He moved to Jennifer and slipped his arms around her waist, then pulled her to him and leaned in to kiss her.
His eyes closed as their lips made gentle contact. His hands slid up and down Jennifer's back as her arms went around his neck. Again the kiss was gentle, though not tentative; it was sweet, but not chaste; it was passionate, but not wicked.
It was perfect.
The fingers of Jennifer's right hand moved up and started playing with his hair as his mind started racing. Jennifer's words rang true and clear in his head, "I need to feel something better; something beautiful to replace the sadness."
His right hand moved to Jennifer's lower back as his other hand moved up to rest between her shoulder blades. He tilted his head to the left for a different angle, then moved back to the right. He wasn't sure how much time had transpired when Jennifer stopped the kiss, and he didn't much care.
Jennifer looked at him as though he were the key to her happiness. Her eyes were sharper than they had been when he first found her in the shower, and her lips were parted ever so slightly, just enough to allow her quick shallow breaths to pass through. She prodded him away from her a few inches and lowered her hands to her sides. She paused for an instant, then slowly raised her right hand upward until her fingers grasped the corner of the towel she'd tucked underneath the rest of the towel to keep it from falling off her.
Just as she was about to tug the corner out Rodney reached over and covered her hand with his to stop her.
Jennifer's startled eyes asked, "What is it?"
Rodney frowned slightly and he wrapped his fingers around hers to move her hand away from the towel. He wanted to show her she wasn't alone; that he was there for her and that he loved her; he wanted to make her feel everything she wanted to feel. Now he knew what to do: remember that he knew this woman better than most, that he loved her and that he had to treat her as though she was the most precious thing in the world to him.
Which she was.
The right corner of his mouth moved upward in a smirk as if to say, "Not yet. First…"
Instead of 'saying' anything else, he released her hands and put his hands on her arms just below her shoulders. He leaned towards her, his lips once again aiming for her inviting mouth. Once her eyes fluttered shut, however, Rodney altered his approach vector and kissed the tip of her nose. He ignored the way her lips formed a happy smile and kissed up along the bridge of her nose and continued upward to give her a kiss on her forehead.
Jennifer's eyes remained closed as her hands felt their way onto his waist and his lips found their way onto her right cheek. He kissed her cheek, then the tip of her nose again and then moved farther over to kiss her left cheek. He could feel the slight wisp of a contented sigh from her mouth against the side of his face as he kissed her cheek again. He kissed along the side of her face towards her ear, dipping lower and taking the soft flesh of her earlobe between his lips when he reached it. Her hands pressed into his waist as he gently suckled the flesh, and when he held it between his lips and flicked it with his tongue she stiffened and then shivered with pleasure.
His right hand moved up along the bare skin of her shoulder and up her neck until that earlobe was caught between his index and middle fingers and his thumb rested on her cheek. At the same time, his mouth abandoned Jennifer's other ear and fell onto her neck just below it. His fingers simultaneously massaged her right earlobe and cheek as he open mouth kissed down along her neck.
Jennifer tilted her head to her left to give him better access and he took advantage of it by kissing back up along the same path and then down again, then taking the time to gently suck and nibble the skin at the junction where her shoulder and neck met. That action drew a soft sound from Jennifer- something like a moan or a groan, but it was neither at the same time.
Rodney gave that area one more soft suckle, then moved his lips onto the pale skin of her shoulder and kissed outward until he reached the edge of her shoulder. She drew in a sharp breath and buried her face against his shoulder as he moved back inward, sliding his tongue along her skin instead of kissing it.
He leaned back enough to let his left hand assume an identical position on her right cheek as his other hand had on the other side of her face, and guided her head up off his shoulder. He didn't give her a chance to open her eyes by capturing her lips with his once more.
It wasn't until he felt Jennifer push her arms onto his back and grasp the fabric of his shirt in her hands that he stopped the kiss.
He looked into her eyes, then snaked his hands down onto her neck, then her shoulders and down her arms, stopping just above her elbows. He applied enough forward pressure to force Jennifer to sit on the edge of the bed. Before she could do or say anything, he knelt down on his right knee before her so that they were more or less at eye level.
Rodney gazed upon Jennifer's beautiful face for a few seconds, her lips slightly swollen from their kissing and cheeks aglow. He slowly reached over with both hands to grasp Jennifer's, which she had settled onto her lap. Her smaller hands fit within the grasp of his bigger hands perfectly. He watched as his thumbs caressed her knuckles, reveling in the feel of her soft hands and slender fingers. He glanced up to see that Jennifer was engrossed with the movements as well. He smiled to himself, pleased and relieved that he appeared to be on the right track.
He brought both her hands up and held them in front of his face, gazing upon them lovingly before kissing her left hand and then her right. His eyes found hers as he lowered her hands onto her lap. His left hand opened up and he placed her left hand over her right so that his hand could close over both of them. His now free right hand moved upward towards Jennifer's face.
The tips of his fingers grazed a feathery trail across her forehead as he swept away the drying strands of hair there. His fingers continued down and then back as he tucked the hair behind her left ear, revealing an unobstructed view of her cheek and ear to him. His hand cupped her cheek, the tip of his middle finger gently fondling her ear lobe as his thumb caressed the upper edge of her cheekbone, just as it had a few moments earlier.
Jennifer closed her eyes and nuzzled her cheek against the palm of his hand, a very slight smile playing her lips which was too much of an invitation for him to pass up. His hand shifted enough for his thumb to find the corner of her mouth. Her eyes were nearly afire when they opened a second later and his thumb traced along her bottom lip to the other corner, then came back along the top lip.
His eyes moved about her face to random points, drinking in the beauty before him before settling on hers to say, "You're so beautiful."
He leaned forward and captured her lips with his, but instead of staying in that position, he moved his hands onto the bed on either side of Jennifer and then carefully pushed forward, forcing Jennifer to lay back on the bed. Rodney followed, breaking their kiss and moving his hands forward to keep him balanced and ensure that he eased himself onto the bed beside her and not on top of her. As he lowered himself onto the bed his left arm bent until he rested on the elbow. He drew his right hand to him, gently scraping across her stomach as he did so.
Jennifer turned her head to face him and Rodney leaned down to kiss her again. This time he flicked his tongue against her bottom lip and earned a delightfully soft moan for his effort. Rodney deepened the kiss and sent his tongue in search of Jennifer's, a short yet incredible journey that resulted in her responding with another contented moan.
Rodney reached up with his free hand and cupped Jennifer's cheek for a moment, then slowly moved it down onto her neck. When his fingers found the edge of her collar bone they traced it inwards to the small hollow at the top of her chest. His fingers waited there for a few seconds tracing around the edge of the hollow and then moved down and encountered the towel.
Jennifer stopped the kiss and gazed at him, and he was happy to see that her eyes were bright and clear. He took the opportunity to look down enough to be able to find the corner of the towel she'd reached for earlier, and with the barest of pressure he pulled it from underneath the towel and peeled the it towards him, exposing Jennifer's right side. He released that part of the towel and grasped the other side in his hand and lifted it away to expose the rest of her body to him.
I still can't believe how lucky I… He banished the rest of that self-important thought from his head. It was about Jennifer, not him. He looked into Jennifer's eyes again as his hand flattened against her tummy just above her navel. He moved his hand up along her abdomen and through the valley between her breasts. When he reached the top of the valley he moved it over to the right, then down around the outer edge of her breast, causing Jennifer to close her eyes and sigh. He kept watching her as he moved his hand back up her chest and repeated the motion with the opposite breast.
He slowly brought his hand up again but stopped in between her breasts, then slid his hand over until his fingers rubbed across the puckered nipple of her left breast.
Rodney gently cupped the breast and rubbed his thumb back and forth over the tiny nub, and he smiled to himself when Jennifer first shivered and then bit her bottom lip. He abandoned that nipple and moved his hand over onto the other breast. His thumb once again found her erect nipple and caressed it, stopping only when Jennifer opened her eyes and her left hand came up to cover his.
They held each other's gaze as Jennifer gently maneuvered his hand onto her stomach and then guided it downward, past her belly button and into the soft curls of her pubic area.
Her hand slid up Rodney's forearm as the tip of his fingers probed into the front edge of her clit.
Rodney hesitated until Jennifer separated her legs just enough to give him the room he needed and then began a slow, circular rubbing motion on that sensitive piece of flesh. He kept massaging the moistening flesh even as Jennifer's hand somewhat erratically moved up the rest of his arm, onto his shoulder and stopped on the side of his neck.
Her fingers spasmed against his neck in sync with the movement of his own actions until his fingers stopped and started circling in the opposite direction. With the change in direction Jennifer gasped- in surprise or pleasure he couldn't tell- and then pulled his head down towards hers. Jennifer's lips found his and they, along with her tongue, attacked them hungrily as his hand continued to work.
Rodney fought to keep up with the kiss. It was so incredible and intense and passionate that it was almost surreal, as though he could wake up any minute from this dream.
Still, he knew it was real, and as if he needed even more proof of it Jennifer started to tilt her hips up and down to create even more pleasure for herself, and him for that matter.
Jennifer's mouth tore away from his as she gasped deeply and she buried her face against his neck. She was breathing fast and hard, the short intense breaths beating against him like a drum. A few seconds later, her head fell back onto the bed as she whimpered loudly into the room, and Rodney took the opportunity to lean down and catch the nipple of her gently swaying right breast in his mouth.
His mouth covered the entire areola and the tip of his tongue flicked back and forth over the sensitive nub. Jennifer's back arched off the bed and Rodney soldiered on bringing an array of contented sounds from Jennifer's lips. He was so caught up in her- her scent, the way she felt and the way she sounded- that he didn't even notice that she'd gone completely still, save for her heaving chest.
Rodney kept his mouth and tongue teasing Jennifer until he felt her left hand on his head. He lifted his face away from her wet and slightly reddened nipple and looked into her eyes. His hand stopped its work and retreated from her pelvic area to rest on her tummy.
And he froze.
A single tear, shiny, bright and large, was streaking down Jennifer's cheek. His first reaction was fear; fear that he'd hurt her or had done something terribly wrong.
His panic must have been written on his face, for she stopped him from asking if she was alright by putting her trembling fingers against his lips, telling her with a dreamy smile and lethargic shake of her head that not only did he not have anything to apologize for, but she was perfectly fine.
His shoulders sagged in relief before he reached over and swept the tear away with his thumb, letting his finger linger on the now damp skin of her cheek for longer than was really necessary. After several moments of silence he watched Jennifer sit up and slide herself off the bed. She was still breathing heavily and Rodney became concerned again until she faced him. Her smile as she held out her hands for him to take was bright and loving, and her brown eyes were…determined.
He maneuvered into a sitting position, took her hands in his- noticing just how soft they were and how warm they had become- and stood up.
Jennifer looked deep into Rodney's eyes as her hands moved up to rest on his shoulders. Their gazes remained locked together as her hands moved down his chest and stomach and finally grasped the hem of his shirt. She lifted the shirt up, hesitating only when she had to wait for Rodney to raise his arms so she could remove it and then tossed it onto the floor.
Rodney lowered his arms and placed his hands on Jennifer's upper arms and began rubbing them from elbow to shoulder. She looked down and reached for the button of his pants. His heart, which was already racing, went into overdrive as she undid the pants and pulled the zipper down over the bulge of his erection.
She looked up and gave Rodney a playful smirk and he felt the heat rise in his cheeks. He shrugged at the gentle jibe, not the least bit sorry that she could get him aroused without actually touching him, and then leaned down to kiss her. She returned the kiss and Rodney felt her hands slip under the top edge of his pants and push it down over his hips. He felt his rigidness spring free from his pants and come to rest against Jennifer's belly, the simple touch nearly like an electrical shock to his system.
Jennifer felt it as well if her slight hesitation in pushing down his pants was any indication. She managed to get them to the midway point of his thighs and brought her hands up to rest on his shoulders.
Rodney nearly moaned like a baby when Jennifer took her lips away from him and looked down as she raised her right foot and used it to push his pants to the floor.
Rodney gave her a grin when she looked at him which she returned with a smirk of her own.
She didn't give him a chance to step out of the pants pooled around his feet. She gently pushed against his shoulders and forced him sit down again.
Rodney leaned back a bit, moving his hands behind him to brace himself, and gave up trying to kick off his pants when Jennifer moved towards him. He couldn't help but be mesmerized by the determined look in her eyes, the pink in her cheeks and the sway of her breasts as she put her left hand on his shoulder and then straddled him, placing her knees on either side of him on the bed.
She gave her head a quick flick to the right, sending her flowing hair behind her, then leaned in and kissed him so hard his arms nearly buckled. Rodney was so overcome with sensory overload from the kiss and the way that Jennifer's breasts grazed so tantalizingly against his chest, that he didn't notice her free hand had taken hold of him until he felt her moist heat completely envelop him.
Rodney couldn't help but whimper into her mouth, though it did nothing to make either of them want to stop the kiss.
Their lips and tongues continued the heated kissing as Jennifer gently lifted herself up then slowly lowered back down again. Rodney moved his upper body forward and his hands found her hips and gently kneaded the flesh there as Jennifer repeated the friction creating movements.
When Jennifer stopped the kiss he had no idea how long they had been making love. It could have been a minute, ten minutes or an hour. Time was nothing to him. She was everything. As cliché as that was.
When Jennifer stopped moving altogether a moment later Rodney's hands moved onto her lower back and her hands went around his neck.
"I love you," Jennifer said with a smile even as her eyes fluttered half closed and her teeth bore down on her lower lip again. She gave him a quick yet intense kiss and then slid her hands down onto his shoulders and, with a flash of badness in her now fully open eyes as his only warning, pushed him onto his back.
Rodney's hands followed the rest of him naturally, flailing about in the space between them for a split second before Jennifer's hands caught them. He separated his fingers when she tried to interlace her fingers with his so that they're hands became joined together.
Jennifer began moving again, her hips repeatedly pushing forward then backward. Her eyes drilled mercilessly into his, laying bare the emotional hell she'd been through over the last few days and, of course, the one thing she needed and trusted to set her free of it: the love she felt for him.
Rodney kept his eyes open and locked onto hers, conveying his own feelings of love and desire until he felt the faint beginning of his release. He reluctantly closed his eyes and tried to reign in his impending orgasm by internally reciting pi, then calculating the decay rate of a pound of naquadah, then a kilogram.
He was about to consider the complex math behind wormhole travel when a short groan and the way that Jennifer's fingernails dug into the backs of his hands gave him cause to open his eyes.
Jennifer had her eyes half closed and head lowered so that her chin nearly met her chest, and she was breathing heavily as her hip movements quickened. The heat generated by their bodies felt incredible to him, and if he had any doubt that she was feeling it as well, it was quashed by the slow trickle of a single bead of sweat winding its way down between her breasts toward her stomach.
Without warning Jennifer cried out and gave a final push backward before squeezing her eyes shut and squeezing his hands. Rodney groaned and his hips instinctively pushed up even as she pushed down onto him, trying to get farther into Jennifer as his resolve failed and he released his hot seed within her.
Rodney closed his eyes as Jennifer collapsed down onto him, their joined hands forcing them both to fling their arms out to their sides. Even in his state of spent arousal Rodney couldn't help but feel a charge of electricity from the way Jennifer's sweat slickened chest pressed against his. He smiled and gave a satisfied sigh as Jennifer's hands released his and moved in to rest on his chest. He put his arms around her and hugged her tightly, reminding her that he was still with her.
When she lifted her head up a while later and looked into his eyes he smiled. He brought his right hand toward him and then swept away a piece of hair that had become matted against her cheek. He returned his hands to her back and smiled to say, "I love you."
She smiled back at him instantly. "I love you, too." She tilted her head enough so their lips could meet in another soft kiss.
Rodney sighed as Jennifer withdrew her lips and rested her head against his chest again. They remained there for some time, Jennifer tracing random patterns through the hair on his chest with her fingers and Rodney rubbing his hands up and down her back, until Jennifer shifted just enough for Rodney to notice.
"What is it?" he asked by sliding his hands up onto her shoulders.
Jennifer lethargically lifted her head up and cupped his right cheek with her hand. "Nothing," she replied with a loving smile.
There was something in the way her eyes avoided his for a millisecond as she had responded. "Jennifer, are you sure…?"
Her thumb quickly moved over onto his lips, stopping him cold. "Believe me, Rodney," she said with a warm smile as her thumb moved down and caressed his chin, "this is exactly what I needed."
She held his gaze for a few moments longer and then braced her hands on either side of him and slowly pushed herself upward.
Rodney kept a careful eye on Jennifer as she eased herself up and then off of him. He tried to find the energy within his sated body to follow, but it wasn't going well. At least it wasn't until Jennifer staggered. As soon as he saw her body waver he jumped up and took her in his arms, supporting her with everything that he had. It took a few seconds for her to look up at him, but when she did he knew it had finally caught up to her and it was time.
He motioned to her bed with his head, and then moved towards the head of the bed with Jennifer in tow. He released her hand, pulled the comforter down and spent a minute gathering her pillows against the headboard, then sat down and leaned back against the wall of pillows he'd arranged. He spread his legs apart and held out his hand, which Jennifer took with a grateful smile. She settled on the bed between his legs and carefully leaned back so that her bare back rested against his chest. Jennifer reached forward and pulled the blanket up over them, and Rodney wrapped his arms around her, laying his hands upon her stomach. He rested his chin on her right shoulder and nuzzled his face against her ear as her hands found his and their fingers intertwined again.
"We lost fourteen," Jennifer said as her hands gave his a gentle squeeze. "We…I couldn't stop them from dying. The youngest was three years old…"
Rodney paid complete and unwavering attention to each and every word Jennifer spoke as she told him the brutal details of those terrible days. He kept his arms around her and his face nestled against hers…just being there for her. And the more she said the more he knew she was the strongest person he had ever met; the more she said the more he knew she was the most caring woman he had ever met; the more she said the more he realized he was the luckiest man in two galaxies; and the more she said the more he loved her.