Soo, this chapter is really thick and positively dripping with angst, perhaps not as much as I've read, but enough to make me too damn nervous about posting it on here. Just a reminder, this is rated M and this chapter deals with some rather sensitive themes, none particularly graphic nor explicit, but they still make me bite my damn nails off each time I re-read this thing. Sorry if this doesn't meet your expectations but between getting fucking fired and finding a new job and getting yelled at by my new boss and losing my unborn baby brother and sister, yeah, I was in a mood for some angst.

PS: Reviewers will recieve a teaser for next chapter as well as a MM from River's life and to make things more challenging for me, you can choose her age. All age is available up to 27, within the following week. Also this story is now officialy getting RE-NAMED into "LIKE A PRODIGAL". Hope you don't mind too much.

Kuddos... :D

"Hold up, hold on, don't be scared…

You'll never change what's been and gone,

May your smile shine on…

Don't be scared,

your destiny may keep you warm…"

She knew she should have never gone back there.

All the mocking stares and the spiteful whispers were simply too much for her to handle.

But her stomach was growling and her body was growing weak and she already had enough fresh bruises on her as it was, she really wasn't sure if she could take another one.

He always hated it when she didn't feed herself well. If you could even call eating 3 meals a week proper feeding, that is.

So, as she always did, she sucked up her pride and tried to hold her head high as she walked in the room even when she was very well aware that the rip in her shirt revealed her bra and the bite marks on her breasts and that the worn-out jeans that were filled with holes and tears had blood on them from her last beating.

She tried to hold it together as she waited in line, her stomach roaring at the scent of food even if it was less than enough and not really all that good tasting, ignoring the knowing smirks from the men around her and the pitiful glances from the shelter's patrons.

She saw Mrs. H, the only woman who truly understood and never judged and tried to give her a brave smile albeit the fact that the waterworks were becoming harder to control and her soul was hurting far beyond any physical pain she had ever felt in her life combined together.

It didn't work.

Mrs. H's eyes saw right through her and although she couldn't raise her gaze long enough to look back at her – she didn't have anywhere near enough dignity for that – she could feel her stare on her, following her from across the room.

She knew what was coming. It was already a routine as far as she was concerned.

In no time, Mrs. H had a hold of her elbow and was dragging her across the room and into the 'staff only' area in the back without a word.

She pulled her inside a small, make-shift bedroom with a dining table and a dresser being it's only accessories. Roughly, she deposited her on the bed and pulled a chair, situating herself right in front of her.

"Just what the hell do you think you're doing to yourself?" her gaze was stern and unforgiving, unlike ever before.

The broken girl on the bed simply hanged her head, allowing her lifeless, ginger locks to cover her face as the sobs started.

Mrs. H sighed, a deep frown marring her aged and elegant features as she raised herself from the clumpy bed and went over to the dresser, pulling out two sandwiches and placing them on the table.

Turning to the girl whom she loved as a daughter, she sighed again and went to crouch down in front of her.

She raised her hand ignoring the flinch the young girl responded with and cupped her cheek, raising her face to meet her.

A silent understanding paced between the two.

The broken girl with ginger hair and lifeless brown eyes and the unusually wise old woman who gave up her free time to help those who didn't know how to help themselves; they both knew what was next.

Still, it never stopped them from pretending.

Mrs. H took off her jumper, remaining in only a simple T-shirt and threw it casually on the bed before moving to the door.

"Stay here, child. I'll be right back."

They both knew that it would be a good hour before she returned and when she did, she would only find an empty wrapping and a note scrawled on the tiny mirror saying only 'thank you' as it did each and every single time before.

But they were both very good at acting and this time wasn't any different.

Only… it was.

"I'm pregnant." River Song's small and timid voice that clashed with her age of almost 17, echoed in the room and froze Mrs. H to her spot. "And it's his."

It was a long time before either of them spoke.

It was along time before either of them even moved.

It was several minutes later that the resounding 'smack' filled the room as River's head went flying to the side and she whimpered, round, crystal tears running down her stinging cheek.

"I told you to take better care of yourself damn it. He will kill you if he finds out and you know that, child." Mrs. H's eyes were filled with tears and her face was twisted into a painful grimace that told of utter heartbreak.

River let out a shout of frustration and anger and pain as she got up and began pacing the room. "He won't, Mrs. H, he can't, he can't do that to me, to us. He can not kill out baby, no, no, he simply can't." she was starting to get hysterical in her ramblings and Mrs. H simply shook her head in sympathy.

She grabbed her by the shoulders and shook her gently, mindful of her injuries.

She made River look her in the eyes and shook her head slowly.

"He won't care."

The words had cut deep. Too fucking deep.

Turned out, Mrs. H was right, after all. The bastards hadn't cared. Oh, he pretended he did, of course. He began showering her with presents with money she never knew he had had. He began taking her out and treating her nicely. Aside from the stray hit here and there on a rough night, she was pretty much all right.

But… of course there is a 'but'…

It didn't stop him from whoring her out to his 'business buddies'.

Nor did it stop him from beating her half to death when she had been seven months along and he had been drunk out of his head and decided that he didn't want the baby anymore.

Mrs. H had found her and had rushed her to the hospital. She had spent 26 hours through labor with River, both of them crying desperately.

River's baby boy had been born at 24 July, 2027 at 03:47am and the official TOD was 05 August, 2027 at 14:25 in the afternoon. Her baby boy had lived for less than two weeks. Worse yet… he had suffered for less than two damn weeks.

And River hadn't been able to do a thing.

She had just watched her boy, her world… suffer and waste away, getting weaker and weaker by the day and she had been so fucking helpless and incapable of doing. Anything. At. All.

He hadn't said a bloody thing. Just smiled at the nurses and answered their questions with spot-on precision she was well accustomed to and took her home. Took her back to hell.

"Death suits him much better than life, if you ask me."

That should have been her first clue that something was seriously wrong.

She hadn't given it a thought at the time, but now… all these years later, she knew better; the words… they were spoken with such cruelty, such hatred, that it made her stomach turn just thinking about them.

Sure, he was a bastard and he was cold and cruel and unmerciful, but… he was human. He still had a heart somewhere deep inside… she hoped.

She had been so mistaken.

There had been no warmth within those words. At all. No regret or pain; no broken-hearted tears or desperate words that were the proper etiquette after receiving the news that your first-born has died.

There was nothing. The one thing she remembered; the only thing she remembered was just… satisfaction and pleasure hidden behind a carefully crafted façade.

God…how could she have been so naïve?

She remembered hearing someone say, she didn't know who, but… she remembered them saying that whilst life was hard, death was much harder.

They were wrong.

In her eyes after all the heartbreak, after every false word and broken promise, after every hit and angry bruise and apologetic roses… after all the sleepless nights spent huddled in a cold, street corner on constant danger alert… she was certain they had gotten it wrong.

Death was easy, peaceful and painless. Life, on the other hand, life was much harder.

Years ago, when things got too hard, she liked to pretend. To pretend that she had a family, that she had a warm bed and safe haven to go back to every time she desired it; every time she needed it.

Now, that brought her no comfort at all. It only reminded her of the harsh reality that was her life.

The good that used be her lifeline when she wanted nothing more than to curl up and die was fading away, becoming such a miniscule part of her past that her mind didn't even deem it worthy enough to remember and protect.

However, what little she could remember of it… it brought a broken smile on her face and a kick to her heart because she knew now that she had been the one to throw it all away.

She gave her own life away into the hands of a stranger that had played his way in and out of her childhood shaping her to become the object of his desires and when someone got in his way… he destroyed them.

Silent tears slipped down her cheeks even at his screams for her to quiet down.

She couldn't and she didn't want to.

If she wanted to cry, than she bloody well was going to do so. She had had just about enough of everything.

"I said, stop crying, pet." His cold, calloused hand reached down, touching her chin. Slowly and with clear enjoinment, his fingers tightened, making her whimper, and pulled her face up to his.

He grinned. It was a cruel, crooked grin filled with malicious intent that undermined the false look of worry and concern sketched in his arctic, blue eyes.

River's face was blackened with tears and some old scars that littered her face and neck were hidden by the new onslaught of blood that ran down from the new wounds he had given her.

However, despite the "Doctor's" intentions, it still couldn't break her.

His little slave still gazed at him with eyes full of determination and disgust, fiercely holding her chin up high and refusing to lower her gaze as he had taught her to do.

Someone was going to pay…

"What it is it to you whether I stop or not?" her voice was strong and clear, if a little hoarse.

He had underestimated his sweetheart. He shouldn't have only placed the steel choker on her neck keeping her bound to the wall behind her; he should have also gagged her. It would have saved him a lot of frustrations.

With a sharp flick of his entire arm, he slapped her on the face, making her head fly to the side. River choked on the blood and bile that rose up her throat.

She had to get away… Somehow… Anyhow… Before he killed her.

Slowly returning her head to face him again, she cringed inside. She thought that she would be able to do this. She thought that she had gotten used to the frequent hits and venomous remarks that marred her both on the outside and on the inside.

Apparently, she hadn't. It seemed that she never truly would.

"How dare you talk to me like that? Who do you think you are, but a worthless, little whore?" he was spitting the words and his eyes flashed with anger.

River didn't say anything; she simple held herself and glared at his eyes, never breaking her gaze.

The "Doctor" raised his hand, ready to strike her again. River simply narrowed her eyes, summoning the last of her strength as her gaze dared him to hit her.

"I wouldn't do that, if I were you."

Using the momentum, River used up all of her remaining strength and gathered her legs at her knees, before pushing them out in a fierce kick directly in the "Doctor's" stomach.

He looked at her, a fleeting, angry glance before falling to the ground coughing blood.

"Impressive."

Reminded of the third presence in the room, River flinched before turning her head carefully towards the direction of the sound.

Upon seeing the person standing propped up on his shoulder against the entrance and taking notice of his short, shaggy blond hair and blue eyes, she smiled in shock and surprise.

After what might have been seconds or minutes or hours, she finally found her voice.

"You!"

The man smirked at her in a cocky manner she had come to recognize about him and tipped his nonexistent Stetson at her.

"Howdy, Commander Tyler, ready to rock this joint up?"