Breaking Point Ch. 03

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters that appear in this story (apart from any characters I may or may not create).

Apologies for the late update. I had so many complications with the story plot and everything affiliated with it, that for this whole week, I was trying to tie the loose ends that kept coming undone. So as a result I have this relatively long chapter that hopefully may simplify things to an extent and this =_=''' - true exhaustion on my part. Exaggerate if you must, creates a deeper effect anyway. ;)

Thanks for the reviews everybody :) I really do appreciate it and do take your input into consideration.

Do enjoy this.

Ambrosia~

Sookie harshly grabbed her wrist back, and hit her palm against Bill's torso, sending him flying through the window, fragments of glass shattering towards the floor. Sookie looked at her hand, glowing brightly in response, "Such beautiful energy," She whispered to herself, desire filling her eyes, "If only I could use it again," She sighed; briefly glancing at the window Bill flew momentarily through.

As she attempted to take a step towards it, she fell to the ground. Pain shot through her chest, surging its way to every limb of her body. What is this? What is this pain! Why do I feel as though I'm losing control of my body? She thought to herself.

"Sookie!" Jason calls out, taking a step forward towards her.

"No! Stay back." Sookie raised her hand, signalling him to remain where he stood, "You can't help me."

She could feel the energy within her begin to undulate, forming ripples beneath her skin. Sookie could do nothing but endure it. Why can't I repress this? Why is my body's desire to take control so powerful and resistant! She asked herself. If I let go … If I let it control me, what will happen? What will I do?

"Sookie, are you … ok?" Eric asked in the spur of the moment. It was hard to differentiate between his imprudence and his false concern for others, that selfish and arrogant bastard.

"What kind of stupid question is that?" Sookie asked, trying to repress her smile.

"It's a question that deserves an answer." Godric answered, walking towards her.

"No! Stay back!"

"That is not your decision to make."

Godric kneels down a few metres in front of her, "Give me your hand."

"Now is not the time to shake hands Godric." She replies, distancing herself.

"I said, give me your hand."

Sookie didn't reply. It was too late for that. She was now in deep meditation, fighting her own battle. The room she was in, now disappeared. The vampires and humans who once stood there, no longer remained. All she could see now was endless darkness and a shadowy figure not so distant away. Sookie recognized her straight away. She was her opponent … her enemy … her self.

"So we finally meet Sookie." The shadowy figure spoke, her voice ominous.

"You're the one who is trying to take control over my body, aren't you?" Sookie asks, a fierce glare escaping her eyes.

"No. I am not. I am your subconscious." She simply replied, not swayed by her compelling stare. She was Sookie after all.

Sookie blinked her eyes, trying to comprehend the situation, "My subconscious?"

"Yes."

"And where am I, exactly?" Sookie asks in an unconvinced tone.

"In the deepest part of your mind." She smiles.

Sookie went quiet for a second. "Impossible." She whispered in disbelief.

"It's dubious, yes, but not impossible. Right now you have the ability to do so."

"And what exactly gives me this … ability?" Sookie asks, still not convinced.

"I'm not certainly sure. However, after examining your past memories, I believe you have reached 'Breaking Point'." She replies in a matter – of – fact tone.

"How do you know this?" Sookie asks.

"I am your subconscious. I am the keeper of your memories, your involuntary movements, your emotions, your beliefs, your skills, your habits, everything you've seen, everything you know, everything you've witnessed, everything you are. I am your autopilot and you cannot control me, only guide me and change me." She humbly replies, smiling at herself.

"I see." Sookie nods her head, swayed by her response. "Then who am I?"

"You are the conscious part of the mind."

"And what am I responsible for?"

"You are the one responsible for reasoning and logic. Whenever you are aware of what you are doing, the conscious mind – meaning you – is in control. Your mental thoughts are what instruct me to make the correct reactions. I simply follow your orders, for I am not one to reason. I only react according to your senses, your mental thoughts and your mental focus."

Sookie stood speechless for a minute or so, trying to formulate an answer. Instead of questioning her subconscious self, Sookie decided to discuss more important things.

"You said Breaking Point gives me this ability to communicate with you … with myself." Sookie asks, trying not to sound crazy.

"Breaking Point allows you to do more that that. However the extent of your powers cannot be measured, only predicted."

Sookie silently stared at your hands, before looking back to her subconscious.

"I vaguely remember hearing those words – Breaking Point – once before. It haunted me in my dreams. I never knew why. I never knew … it was a memory." She told her, continuing to stare at her hands, many trifling emotions swaying her thoughts.

"Those words were heard on the same night your parents died. You were seven." Her subconscious sighed. "It was the first time you reached Breaking Point. It was also the first time you lost control and became animalistic, just what you are about to become."

Sookie glanced at her subconscious self in anxiety, "Why do I remember this now, why not before?"

"Nothing is certain. I believe these memories were hidden from us." She walked up facing Sookie, "Not even I can recall these memories … not until you reached Breaking Point."

"What else can you tell me about this ability?"

"There is not much I can tell you, for your memories are very limited. All I know is that on that night in question, you witnessed a crime being committed by two serial killers. They were assaulting a girl. I believe this catalysed the movement of change. This catalysed Breaking Point. Just like Luke's threat catalysed this Breaking Point. I believe this ability also enhances your senses, increasing your perception and your telepathic energy, giving you the ability to use mind control. The other energy that I remember you using that night and this evening – the one used against Bill – cannot be identified. It is foreign to me. That is all that can be remembered. Once you lost control, so did I. This resulted in your animalistic, savage and predatory side taking over. It affected us physically and mentally. It affected us both. It enshrouded us in darkness."

"Yes. I remember now. I remember everything. Those serial killers, the girl, and Jason, I hurt Jason ... badly."

"Yes. You did."

"There were also these men that appeared out of nowhere. There's not much that can be remembered about them though, apart from the fact that they said I reached Breaking Point. I felt threatened straight away by them and was therefore consumed by rage, anger and hatred that I lost control. I don't remember anything after that."

"Neither do I. Your memories blacken once you lose control."

"Can you tell me why I become … evil?"

"No. I am your subconscious only. I hold your past, not the answers you seek. I have only seen what you have seen, nothing more."

"I understand. I'm just afraid. Even though right now I have a sadistic desire to see pain and suffering, I still fear myself and what I am capable of achieving once I lose control. I fear I am a danger to us all."

"As well as I," She placed her hand on Sookie's shoulder, "However, I believe we are in a more dangerous position. I fear this ability will take much more than it gives."

Sookie looks at her subconscious self and contently smiles.

"Maybe so—."

Before Sookie could finish her sentence, both of them suddenly cascaded towards the ground. The pain had returned. The two Sookie's looked at each other, agony in their eyes, their control dissipating. All they could do was gaze at each other as their bodies convulsed, trying to fight against the will of the power.

"Why … does … this … happen?" Sookie mumbled, struggling to speak. "It … occurred after … I used … my powers on Bill."

"I assume it's the body's way of saying 'I want you to lose control. I want you to become the person you so fear. It's my turn to shine. It's my turn to be in control.' From what I remember, this pain will occur every time you feel threat or when you use your powers. Every time you use your powers, you will lose a bit of your control and your strength to resist it. When it becomes too painful to bear, you will lose your control and fall into darkness. Your instability will only give your body more opportunities to take over."

"I assumed that after I attacked Bill." Snickering to herself in content. "Luke however fell easily to my mind control, I didn't require to use much of my powers. It was probably why I felt no pain."

The subconscious nodded at Sookie's theory, agreeing with her statement. "Yes. I believe that is so. If I may ask, why did you attack Bill? Aren't you his property?"

"I believe that at that moment, when he grabbed my wrist, I saw something … in his mind, something I couldn't possibly bear or comprehend. It enraged me enough to attack him. I was lucky enough to not lose it at the moment and kill him."

"What did you see in his mind, of all things?"

"Deception … Lies … Betrayal." Sookie looked down to the bottomless pit of darkness, "All his thoughts, everything he had seen, everything he had done. It was as though his whole life was played before my eyes in seconds. I saw ... the Queen."

"The Queen?"

"The Queen of Louisiana. I also saw my cousin Hadley; who should be in rehab by all means, and Bill. I saw Bill ... and the Queen, talking ... about me." Sookie told her in disbelief of the memory.

"Care to explain?" Her subconscious self asked empathetically.

"You'll know soon enough. You're my subconscious. You hold my memories remember." Sookie smiled, pain in her eyes.

Her subconscious self looked at her, understanding in her cold eyes. The pain that momentarily consumed their bodies vanished, replacing them with warmth and love. They could even hear a few words being whispered to them in Swedish.

"Får min kropp att ge dig den värme du behöver, så att den kan smälta din kalla, mörka hjärta."A voice whispered in the darkness.

(May my body provide you with the warmth you need, so that it may melt your cold, dark heart)

"Återgå till mig kvinnan, jag så innerligt önskar."

(Return to me the woman, I so earnestly desire)

Suddenly Sookie started to feel transparent, as though she was withering away; disappearing.

"What is happening to me?" She called out to her subconscious self, "Why am I disappearing?"

"I don't know. I never expected this. When you reach this far into the mind, it's a one way road to losing control." She replies astonished. "There is no going back."

"You're telling me this now!" Sookie yelled.

"It's common sense Sookie. Did you really believe you could return, when right now you're in the eye of the storm?" She replied, "Right now, we're covered in darkness, it was only time before we were to be consumed by it, blinded by it, enshrouded by it."

"Kan mina armar lyfter dig från ditt fängelse av mörker."

(May my arms lift you from your prison of darkness)

Sookie looked at her hands in fear. They were barely visible now, camouflaging with the darkness surrounding them. She could see her vision blurring. She could feel her body being pulled out. It was painful, so very painful. It was though you were trying to escape from a black hole, when gravity so willingly pulled you in. As light dawned upon them she could hear a voice, a faint voice in the air.

"May you never return Sookie," Her subconscious whispered undiscernibly, "For now you know what awaits you in the darkness below. The consequences you must face. The road you will inevitably take. Let this be a warning to you."

Sookie smiled to no one and breathed two words.

"Thank you."

And then she was pulled out, no longer in darkness, but in the arms of Godric, who sat supportively behind her. His legs sat apart, where Sookie so comfortable lay in between, her back lying against his chest. His strong arms lay coiled around her body, holding her close. His head tucked in close to her neck, breathing words of support in her ear.

Sookie's abruptly opened her eyes, her breaths heavy and deep, gasping for air.

A slight smile emerged from Godric's lips. "Slutligen … Du har återvänt."

(Finally … You have returned)

Sookie spun her head towards Godric, who she now realised, was holding her. She looked at his arms which were wound tightly around her. She could feel every contour of his body and she lay against his chest. Why am I not resisting against his touch, his hold … his caress? She thought, as he pulled her in closer to his body. Why doesn't my body fight back? Why am I not threatened by him? She asks herself, as Godric looked earnestly into her eyes, a deep growl formulating within him.

Sookie shivered in rapture. Her body didn't struggle against him at all. She felt no threat but pure enjoyment and pleasure. In Sookie's eyes, Godric was absolutely intoxicating.

As she was about to be drawn to his lips, she noticed something from the corner of her eye. It lay so serenely silent on the floor, not so far away. It was Luke, or what was left of him. Sookie's sadistic desire returned, no longer was she trapped in Godric's web of Euphoria. Sookie unravelled herself from Godric's clutches effortlessly, standing up to complete her objective; Kill Luke.

Godric quickly grabbed her hand, "He has suffered enough. Do you not have the heart to forgive?"

Sookie looked at their entwined hands and smiled. "No."

Sookie kept looking at their entwined hands, still surprised that she felt no hostility towards Godric. She felt no desire to attack him but to hold. She wanted to touch him. She wanted to explore his body with her fingertips … or her tongue. Sookie met his eye with hers and saw that they were filled with lust and hunger. Her eyes were filled with the same desires and maybe more. Godric slightly pulled her towards him, his eyes fixated on hers, as though to dazzle her.

Sookie snickered and grabbed her hand back, shocking all the humans and vampires surrounding them, "You dare dazzle me Godric?" She asked, crossing her arms in curiosity, "How insulting. I thought you'd think better of me."

"My concerns lie with Luke. Why do you so willingly wish to end his life?" He asked, his emotions getting the better of him.

"My intentions are my own. If I wanted to explain I would have done so before. But I didn't." She sighed, not interested to hear a second opinion.

"Do not do this. The intent to make someone suffer will only bring you greater pain in the end."

"I know." Sookie replied calmly. "But I guess that's the price one will pay, when they decide to end one's life." She turns her back on him and walks towards Luke.

"Wait—," Godric begins, reaching out his arm towards her.

"—Stopp Godric. Det är ingen idé att försöka övertyga henne." Eric tells him. "Hon är förbi gränsen för rationalitet som den är. Underskatta inte henne."

(Stop Godric. There is no point trying to convince her.) (She is way past the boundary of rationality as it is. Do not underestimate her.)

"Jag vet."

(I know)

"Sedan låta henne gå." Eric places his hand on Godric's shoulder, "Hon måste lära sig den sanna innebörden av ånger."

(Then let her go.) (She needs to learn the true meaning of regret.)

Godric drops his arm in defeat. "Du har rätt Eric," Backing away to the sidelines with Eric at his side.

(You're right Eric)

Sookie turned her head towards the vampires and humans, who were all holding their tails between their legs. So much for bravery and courage, She thought to herself, convinced they could do nothing to prevent her from what she was about to do next. Not even Godric and Eric attempted to stop her.

"Now, where were we?" She asked Luke; sprawled on the floor in chains.

Luke didn't respond. He was so close to death, that life was no longer an option.

Sookie rubbed her chin, tapping her lips as she paced side to side, "You know I never thought you'd be so weak against my mind control Luke, "A sadistic smile emerging from her lips, "But then again, everyone is." She chuckled, pleased with herself, "Now, lets end this."

Godric who was staring at Sookie stepped forward, his emotions getting the better of him once again.

"Wait!" Jason yells, moving past Godric to stand in between Sookie and Luke, "Why are you doin' this?" He asks Sookie, worry deeply engraved in his heart.

Sookie's heart sunk lower, So many disturbances. She sighed in her thoughts. Can't I just kill someone in peace? Is that so much to ask?

Sookie straightened up, trying to retain her composure.

"Because I can, and because I can … I will." Sookie replied, moving closer to Jason, "I wouldn't expect you to understand Jason, not everything's in black and white, but right now I have a purpose I intend to complete. Luke … is my purpose."

Jason went silent, contemplating his answer.

"If you have nothing more to say, I'd appreciate it if you'd move aside and let me finish what I started." Sookie replied, impatience evident in her tone of voice.

Jason straightened up. "No. I refuse to. You're gonna have to go through me first before you get to Luke." He tells her, adrenaline rushing through his veins, his fighting spirit returning.

Sookie smiles, "You are brave Jason, you always have been, never afraid to back down from a fight." She says proudly, examining her brother's audacity, "But you and I both know this fight has already been decided. You have tried stopping me before, many years ago. Don't you remember that day?" Sookie asks.

Jason looked at her, trying to recollect the memories of his childhood, that specific day that is hidden deep in his subconscious. Jason shakes his head, "Not much. No. But I remember you actin' like this. This mind control shit, hurtin' people. Lucky the victims even survived!"

"What else do you remember?"

"I remember you bein' stopped, that's what! Some men appeared out of nowhere and hit you with this bright light that came out of the palm of their hands, just like you did before with Bill. After that you fell to the ground, unconscious." Jason replied, crossing his arms.

Sookie snickered, "Wow. You remember a lot, don't you?" She asks, beginning to pace, "Probably a lot more than I do. My memories stop ... at a certain point."

"That's not somethin' I can forget Sook."

"Do you remember what happened when you tried to stop me, just like you're trying to do now?" Sookie asked, looking at the floor before meeting his gaze.

Jason thinks long and hard, forcing his mind to remember. After a few minutes, his face relaxed.

"No. It seems I can't remember. But you know what, I don't really care anymore, I just don't want you hurtin' anymore people, including Luke." He replies, his gaze fierce, his body prepared and ready to fight.

"Jason, the first time I hit 'Breaking Point', you nearly died." Sookie informs him, hoping to get her message through.

"What?" Jason asks, his confidence vanishing.

"You heard me. You tried stopping me with your fists, using your body as a shield to protect these humans, who in fact were serial killers, assaulting a girl. You totally misunderstood the whole situation and therefore suffered physically for it." Sookie explained, keeping her eyes to the floor, trying to repress her impatience and her desire to kill, "Honestly, I don't even know how you survived that night. I hadn't even lost control yet."

Jason didn't answer. His eyes shifted from Sookie to the ground, where they remained.

"Maybe now you can understand why you are at a loss."

'Wait a minute!" His head jolted up, "You said Breaking Point! The men there that night, that rendered you unconscious said the same damn words!"

Sookie didn't answer.

"I finally get it. That's what this is, isn't it. That's the state you are in now!" Jason nods, smirking to himself. "It's why you've gone mad! You've reached Breaking Point!"

Sookie met his eyes, before turning around, her back now facing Jason, "This is not madness. This is nowhere near madness." She whispered to herself.

"Look, we can get through this together," Jason tells her, reaching out his hand towards her, "I know we can."

"No! Don't touch me!" Sookie backs away, alarming the vampires and humans close by, "I lack control in this state Jason, if my body feels threatened, even once, I will attack." Sookie tells him, hugging her body in order to repress the urge to strike, "Right now Jason, I am capable of losing complete control of myself. Once that occurs, I will become a savage and even harm those who are innocent … I will go for the kill." Sookie looks up to Jason, her eyes unfocused, her breaths heavy, her nails digging deep into her skin, "Once I lose control during Breaking Point … I can never go back."

Sookie falls to the floor, no longer able to support herself.

"Sookie!" Jason calls out, running towards her.

Godric quickly grabs his arm before he can reach her. "No Mr. Stackhouse. You are in no position to assist her by any means."

"But she is my sister!" Jason fights back, Eric grabbing his other arm.

"She is also a danger to us all." Eric adds.

Both Eric and Godric pull Jason back towards the wall.

"I can feel it Jason, the power, the pain … the bloodlust …" Sookie whispers, struggling to breathe, "… it's taking over."

Godric walks to the center of the room, the Sheriff within taking over, His commanding stature overpowering everyone in the room.

"Everyone, take all invaluable objects with you and leave. This place is no longer safe."

Everyone began hastily moving, grabbing what they could find before running out of the house in dismay.

"Isabel, make sure everyone is out of the complex. Aid those in need of assistance."

"Yes Sheriff" She replied and disappeared into the crowds.

"Stan, heal Mr McDonald and take him back to the Fellowship. He has suffered enough. Make sure he has no recollection of this night."

"But Sheriff—,"

"That's an order underling."

"Yes … Sheriff."

"Mr Stackhouse." Godric calls out.

"Yes Sheriff," He answers, his eyes not leaving Sookie.

"Will you do me the favour by accompanying Stan and Mr McDonald to the Fellowship? I fear he may not survive the journey." Godric asks him, glancing at Stan a few times.

"I'd be honoured Sheriff." He replies, making his way to Luke; attempting to untie his chains, "Damn Sook! You really went too far. I can't get this loose!"

Stan sighed and shoved Jason aside, startling him, "Stand aside Stackhouse. I'll show you how it's done."

Stan cracked his knuckles, adjusted his gloves, fastened his hands on the chain, and began to pull.

It didn't budge.

"Well that's humiliating." Jason says, crossing his arms, "Thought you'd make even the slightest improvement. Guess I was wrong."

A deep growl resonated from Stan's throat, his fangs slowly beginning to extract.

Godric sharply faced Stan, "Underli—,"

A piercing cry escaped Sookie's lips, startling everyone remaining in the room. Everyone watched as Sookie tried to hold on to whatever control she had left. It was like holding onto a cliff edge with one finger holding your weight. Even though waves of pain and power surged throughout her body, she wouldn't let it defeat her. She couldn't let it defeat her!

She had to stay strong.

C'mon Sookie! You can't let this win. You may have turned sadistic and sinister, but you're still the Southern Belle from Bon Temps, Louisiana. She thought to herself, refusing to give in. Gran raised you to be strong, not to be weak! This … This right here is weakness! Sookie painstakingly tried to lift herself up, ignoring the pain that tempted her to think otherwise. Keep going Sookie. Don't give in.

Godric and Eric watched in awe and torment as she struggled to keep her sanity and the control she so strongly held onto. She was so strong to resist it this far.

Slowly Sookie balanced herself on her two feet, holding the wall for support. They waited anxiously as she remained in that one position against the wall.

"Hon faller," Eric tells him, "Det är bara en tidsfråga innan hon förlorar den helt."

(She's falling) (It's only a matter of time before she loses it completely)

"Tappa inte bort tro Eric. Hon är starkare än oss båda." Godric replies.

(Do not lose faith Eric. She is stronger than us both)

After several minutes they saw her relax, one deep breath after the other. She glanced at Jason and smiled, "The pain is gone … finally." She sighed, sinking down to the floor once again, "I'm so exhausted Jason, so very … exhausted." She tilts her head against the wall and closes her eyes.

Jason took a step forward.

"Stay away Jason. I'm too unstable right now. If my body feels threatened once more, it will consume me whether I fight it or not. I am much too dangerous now." She informs him, opening her eyelids to look at her terrified brother, fearful to take another step.

"Even you fear me." She weakly snickers, "You all do," Looking around to Stan, Eric and Godric, "… Even I do."

Sookie closes her eyes once again. "Now I'd appreciate it, if you'd let me rest," Another deep breath escaping her lips.

Godric nods his head to Sookie before turning his head to Stan and Jason.

"Take Mr McDonald far from here. His life is in jeopardy now." Godric orders them.

"The chains Sheriff, if you please," Stan mumbles.

Godric swiftly appears before Luke, and uncoils the chains from his body in an instant, "Now, take him and leave."

"Yes Sheriff," Stan and Jason replied.

"No more harm shall come to hi—,"

'—Sookie!" Bill's head appears from the broken window, "This isn't the time to be playing games!" He states, promptly appearing a few metres before her.

Sookie sharply jolted open her eyes and froze. She felt threat, so much threat that she instantly but silently lost control. No chance to resist. No chance to fight back. No chance to feel pain. The transition from conscious and unstable Sookie to unconscious and deadly Sookie. She had now just become the person she so feared and now it was her turn — unconscious Sookie — to play.

"C'mon Sookie, lets go back to Bon Temps. You have served your purpose here." He explains. "They don't require your assistance anymore."

Sookie didn't respond, nor did she move.

"I suggest you leave now Mr Bill Compton." Godric advised him.

"I am not leaving here without Sookie!" Bill replied gravely, forcibly grabbing her wrist. "She is my property. She belongs to m—,"

Sookie grabs her wrist back, clasps both of her hands on either side of his head and roughly jerks it to one side, breaking it. "Not … anymore." She breathes ominously in his ear, no longer in control of her body, no longer conscious. She pushes Bill's body to the floor and looks at him. No pity in her eyes, no remorse and no mercy, just pure satisfaction. And there she waited stealthily, like a predatory observing it's prey, for Bill to heal.

To be cont.

I only had a rough idea on the roles of the subconscious and the conscious mind, so don't hate :( I did a little research here and so I'm not completely stupid. I was pretty fascinated with it all actually :) made me feel a bit smarter. Haha. And the dialogue in Swedish may not be accurate since I used a translator ONLY so do correct me if you must. I have to say, I enjoy Bill's occasional appearances. Hahaha. My best friend and I have made quite a joke out of it actually; imitating the way he says 'Sookie!' Gosh! We seriously ROFL every time we hear it or say it :) We know we're mocking him but it doesn't concern either one of us. Haha. He deserves it at the least. Apart from that.

Stay tuned for the next chapter.

As the story unfolds, so will the explanation and our understanding.

Until then.

R&R. ;)