Disclaimer: I don't own anything except for Rebecca and don't plan on making any money off of this.

Author's Note: All right, y'all, this chapter was so hard for me to write. I hadn't gotten a lot written until yesterday, when I suddenly wrote the last 3 scenes in this rapid-fire. FYI, my husband and I are in the process of trying to buy a house right now, so the next update might take a while. Apologies in advance, but hopefully this makes up for it. Hope you enjoy! I love reviews!

Closure, April 12, 2001

"We built sand castles that washed away. / I made you cry when I walked away. / And although I promised that I couldn't that I couldn't stay, baby, / Every promise don't work out that way. / Every promise don't work out that way... / And your heart is broken 'cause I walked away. / Show me your scars and I won't walk away. / And I know I promised that I couldn't stay, baby, / Every promise don't work out that way, no, no, no, no, no. / Every promise don't work out that way." – "Sandcastles" by Beyoncé

Rebecca sat on the other side of her brother, their mother beside him. Her lawyer sat just on the other side of Rose Felan. Across the table were Roger Felan and his lawyer. Rebecca noticed her father looked angrier than usual, his brows furrowed fiercely over his eyes and a deep frown upon his face.

She smoothed her grey skirt, then recrossed one leg over the other, giving herself a chance to look away from him. Her outfit was a perfect study in neutrality and power: a dark red blouse coupled with the grey jacket and skirt to match and a pair of black heels. Her hair she had put up in a careful bun.

Nic put his hand over hers on the table as their mother signed the paper that would finalise this months-long process. When Rose was done signing, she pushed it across the table toward Roger. He paused, giving her a very long look. Rose shifted under his gaze, but didn't drop her own.

Roger finally signed the paper and remained seated while their lawyers stood and shook hands. Mr. Travers turned to Rose and spoke quietly, telling her she was permitted to go at this time, and he'd be in contact soon.

Without a look toward her ex-husband, Rose turned to her son and daughter with a smile. Rebecca returned the look, feeling a swell of pride for her mother taking this step in her life.

"I knew you'd choose her."

Rebecca and her brother and mother paused, looking at each other uncertainly before they turned toward the lone man still seated at the table. His lawyer leaned over and put a hand on Roger Felan's shoulder, beginning to whisper in his ear.

"I'm allowed to speak my mind," Roger snapped.

His lawyer stood straight once more, frowing at his client. Roger looked ahead once more.

"Excuse me?" Rose said.

"You heard me."

"This isn't about choosing a side, Roger."

Rebecca could tell it was taking all the strength her mother had to remain calm. She stepped forward and took her hand and squeezed gently.

"Why don't you and Nic go out in the hallway," she said. "It seems that Dad and I need to have a few words."

"I didn't say I wanted to talk to you, girl."

Rebecca's head turned stiffly to face him. "And I didn't say I was giving you an option."

"Becca, you don't need to do this," her mother whispered.

"This is something I've needed to do for a while."

Her mother's fingers gripped hers tightly, but let go a moment later. Nic gripped her shoulder before following their mother out into the hallway. Rebecca looked to the lawyers with a pleasant smile.

"If you could give my father and I the room for a moment, please."

The older men looked uncomfortable with the notion, but complied, moving toward the door. Roger stood quickly, making as if to follow them. Rebecca took a step in front of him and stopped him with the frown she turned upon him.

She heard the door shut behind her.

"Let me make myself perfectly clear—"

"I have nothing to say to you," Roger said, his voice raised.

"I've already told you I don't care if you won't talk to me, but you will listen," Rebecca said, taking another step toward him.

Roger took a step back, his angry exterior broken for just a second.

"Why are you afraid of me?" she asked.

"I'm not afraid of you." He squared his shoulders, but his eyes watched her hands carefully.

"Don't act as though I'm the one who should be afraid of you."

"I never raised a hand to you," Roger said, narrowing his eyes. "Not to any of you."

"No, but that doesn't mean you weren't abusive in your own right."

He scoffed, turning from her to go around the table. This would be how he'd make his exit. Rebecca turned her eyes toward the door and muttered under her breath. By the time Roger touched the handle, it wouldn't turn.

"Unlock the door right now," he said through gritted teeth.

Rebecca turned to face him. "Not until you've heard what I've had to say."

Roger rounded toward her, closing the distance at a rapid pace. He stopped just before her, glaring. Rebecca remained unmoved, and simply raised an eyebrow at him. When he made no other move, she figured he would at least hear her.

"I don't want you bothering Mum ever again," she said, her voice even. "Talk to Nic if you'd like. He still holds out hope for you coming round. This is likely the last time I'll ever see you, unless you're willing to make great strides toward repairing what you've done to me and the rest of our family."

She saw his jaw tighten. "What I've done to the family?" He shook his head. "You're the reason this family fell apart."

"If that's what you think, that's fine. The rest of us know the truth."

Rebecca looked him over quickly, trying to figure out what aspect or part of him had transferred to her. Perhaps his stubbornness. Her mum had told her that her father had been quite a fun-loving young man, but he had his own belief system that he refused to change. It definitely explained his reaction to his daughter being different.

"Are we done here?" he asked.

"One more thing."

"What?"

"I want you to understand that I really did care about you, even when it was obvious you never did. And maybe that's my fault. You're my father, and all I wanted was for you to love and be proud of me. But I know that I'll never get that from you, and I'm okay with that."

She took a half-step toward him, invading his space enough that he leaned back even as she kept coming.

"Know that if you never ask me for forgiveness, I won't think about you. Not even once. I won't even pretend I've heard your name if anyone says it or asks me about you. But I know you'll think about me every day."

"What makes you so sure?" Roger asked, his lip rising into a sneer.

"Because your hatred of me ensures that I'll always be at the forefront of your mind."

With another muttered word, Rebecca unlocked the door to the room. Roger looked toward the door, then back at Rebecca.

"Goodbye, Mr. Felan."

She forced the most pleasant smile to her face that she could. The one she reserved for complete strangers whose eyes she'd accidentally met. She stood at ease just in front of him, distancing herself from him with each passing moment.

Roger stared at Rebecca for much longer than he'd meant to. A complete change had come over her that was unnerving. It was as though she'd completely restarted and no longer recognized him. Her smile was kind, but the rest of her features showed that there was no emotion toward him.

He backed away from her slowly, unable to look away. When he reached the doorway, only then did he turn and quickly exit.

Rebecca waited a beat before taking in a great breath and letting it out. Her limbs loosened and she walked out of the room, where Nic intercepted her with a hand on her upper arm.

"What did you do to him? He looked like he'd seen a ghost or something."

"Do what to whom?" Rebecca asked. She intended to keep her promise.

Nic opened his mouth, then chose to shut it. He looked down the hall, where he could see their father turning the corner toward the lifts. Then he met Rebecca's eyes again. He pieced together what happened and shook his head.

"Never mind," he said. "Come on, I'm taking my favourite ladies out to lunch."

"Does Amber know she's not your number one?" Rebecca asked with a chuckle.

"Beside her. Family first, always."

He put an arm around Rebecca's shoulders and walked them over to their mother. He threw his other arm around her shoulder and drew them in. Rebecca couldn't help but laugh.

She'd first experienced brotherly affection from Harry and Ron and the rest of the Weasley boys. With her slowly growing relationship with Nicolas over the past couple of years, she'd seen it from him more. And more still since late August, when they'd begun monthly family nights. And she enjoyed the feeling. It wasn't awkward anymore.

She stayed with her family late into the afternoon, until she left her mother back at her own flat. As Rebecca turned from her mother's closed door, she thought back to her experience earlier that day. The moment of closure had felt wonderful.

She'd been working through quite a few things from her past over the last year, and making great strides since returning to Hogwarts. Rebecca felt as though she was learning more about herself. There were only two open matters that needed resolving, and the second wouldn't come until August the first.

As she exited her mother's building, Rebecca found herself looking for a place that was safe for Apparation. Another few minutes found her walking confidently to Jamie's door without any idea of what she'd actually say to him. Before she could stop herself, she knocked.

There was a drawn out pause before the door opened. Rebecca was met by a very surprised Frank Turner. He quickly got himself together and smiled at her.

"Been a while," he said, nodding. "You here for my brother?"

"Yes, actually. I just got done with Mum's divorce and had some good conversation. Figured I'd stop by."

Frank nodded and stepped aside to let her in. "He's on his computer. I'll just step out for a few while you two talk."

"Thanks, Frank."

Frank was already putting on his jacket when he waved her inside. Rebecca stepped just inside and took off her suit jacket, already too warm for the changing weather. Frank gave her a nod and stepped out into the hallway, closing the door softly behind him.

"Frank, come look at this!"

Rebecca turned toward Jamie's voice. She put her jacket over the back of the chair in the living room and walked toward the back of the flat. It took her a couple of seconds until she was leaning against the door frame of his room, the master suite. She crossed her arms, taking in the sight.

The queen bed took up the center of the room, the desk Jamie sat at situated on the right side of the room. His headphones were still on. Rebecca noticed they'd managed to lower the desk so that he could simply fit his wheelchair underneath. The open closet door at the back of the room saw that everything else was lowered within easy reach of him. Everything was very clean and orderly, even what little was displayed on top of the dresser to the left of the bed.

"Just wait 'till you see this..."

He turned his head toward the door, smirking. His eyes widened and his mouth opened and shut quickly when he saw her. His hands quickly removed the headphones from his head before they went to his chair and began pushing himself away from the desk.

"I wasn't sure I'd see you again."

Rebecca used her shoulders to push herself off the door frame. "Come on out in the living room and we'll talk."

She could hear him following her, tracking his progress on the hardwood floors.

"You're very dressed up today."

"I was just at my mum's divorce," Rebecca said, raising her voice to ensure he'd hear her. "Figured I needed to look presentable."

She turned around and sat in the chair, the same one where she'd placed her jacket over the back. Jamie was coming out of the the hallway. He slowed, seeming uncertain where to settle to speak with her.

"I assume things went well?" he asked.

"As well enough as a divorce can go, I suppose."

She shrugged. After a moment, Jamie still looked unsure. Rebecca sat up straight, her hands in her lap, left leg crossed over the right. She watched him evenly.

"Did you get my letter?" Jamie asked the ground, voice quiet.

"I did."

She was surprised he hadn't sent flowers along with the letter or instead of a letter altogether. But then again, he knew her inordinately well. And Frank also probably advised against it, if Jamie had even asked his brother at all. The flowers would have made the apology seem cheap, fleeting.

But he'd made an effort, humbling himself and trying to explain everything that had led up to making his decision, even the conversation he'd had with Frank concerning his feelings toward her. Rebecca found herself reading the letter every so often after initially reading it five times over the first day she had it. The anger and fear the situation had caused her was still too real to respond in person or in kind. Though here she was now.

"I guess I shouldn't be surprised you didn't respond," Jamie said.

He was still across the room from her, his own hands now in his lap. His back and shoulders slumped so that he was looking at her from beneath his curly, brown hair.

"I'm here now." She looked at him a second, but he still wouldn't meet her eye. "I could tell from your letter—can still tell—you're sorry."

"I feel like such a fool. And a terrible friend. I wouldn't have blamed you had you never spoken to me again."

He glanced at her, then looked away quickly again.

Rebecca took in a breath, leaning forward so that her elbows rested on her knees. "I wanted to come here to tell you that I've forgiven you."

His head shot up, his expression telling her that he didn't believe what she said.

"We still have to talk through this," she said.

Jamie rolled himself closer, but stopped himself about four feet from the chair in which she sat. "I wasn't wrong."

His tone was gentle, and Rebecca knew he was trying to be tentative. She shook her head.

"No, but I'm also not completely comfortable with that revelation, either."

"I understand."

The silence of the room surrounded them, with both of them looking at the other.

"I don't want to ask anything of you, not now," Jamie said, shaking his head.

Rebecca nodded slowly, staring at her hands, which she clasped before her. "I don't know that I'll have an answer for you any time soon."

"I don't care."

He pushed himself forward, and Rebecca straightened once more. Jamie came to a stop just beside her chair, but didn't make a move to touch her.

"I want to be a part of your life in whatever capacity you're comfortable with, Rebecca," Jamie said. "Our friendship is one of the most important ones I've ever had in my life. I wouldn't risk that for anything."

Rebecca turned her head and stared as he spoke. She let the quiet of the flat fall over them once more. Finally, she moved her hand toward his. His fingers gripped hers just as tightly as hers did.

"Things would have been much simpler if this had happened three years ago," she said, smirking.

"Yes, but we are two of the most difficult people in the world," Jamie said, patting her hand with a smile. "Nothing can be simple for us."

He let go of her hand and rolled himself across the living room.

"Can I get you anything to drink?"

"Black coffee."

"Another British convert."

Rebecca rolled her eyes. "If you must know, my mother uses tea as a way to soothe everyone after emotional situations. I'm tired of tea at the moment."

She heard Jamie laugh from the kitchen as he started the coffee.

"Tell me about what happened today."

She did, even referring to her father as Mr. Felan as a workaround so she could discuss what had transpired between the two of them. They were still talking when Frank came back thirty minutes later.

Frank paused just inside the door, looking between the two of them. They sat on opposite ends of the sofa, not touching. Clearly the subject matter they'd been discussing was serious, as his brother had his own concerned expression. Frank nodded toward Jamie's mug.

"You leave me any?"

"Plenty," Jamie said.

Frank turned toward the kitchen and got himself a cup of coffee before entering the living room once more. He sat on the chair across from the sofa and the two occupants of the room.

"Care to loop me in to your discussion?"

Rebecca gave him a condensed version of what had happened earlier that day. Frank seemed to approve, if the tone of his grunt in response to her conversation with her father was any indication.

"Men like him don't deserve forgiveness," Frank said.

"I don't think that's going to be something I have to consider," Rebecca replied.

Frank nodded. He looked between his younger brother and this girl who had somehow weaseled her way into his protective circle. His index finger moved between the two of them, then he looked at Rebecca.

"What's all this mean, then?"

She looked to Jamie, then back to Frank. "We're friends until I decide otherwise, if ever."

"Glad my little brother didn't run you off permanently. Kinda liked having you around."

Rebecca smiled. "I missed you too, Frank."

"Would you like to stay for dinner?" Jamie asked.

"I've got to be back to the castle soon, but thank you," Rebecca said, standing. "Maybe another time." She paused. "I mentioned what's happened to the core group."

"I expected that. Do they hate me?"

"They're a smidge irritated."

"A get-together's in order, then," Jamie said. "We'll set this all to rights?"

Rebecca nodded. "Yes, maybe this weekend. I'll get in touch with them and reach out to you about it."

"Sounds great."

"Frank, you're more than welcome to come, too."

"Wouldn't miss Jamie's public shaming for anything."

Rebecca smiled at Jamie, but broke their eye contact to turn toward Frank. She leaned down to give him a hug and to take her jacket from the back of the chair. He leaned forward to allow her to take it easily.

"See you, Rebecca."

"Bye, Frank."

She let herself out. Frank held the mug in both hands as he lowered his head to look at Jamie.

"Tread carefully, Jamie."

"I'm not gonna mess this up, Frank. She's set all the boundaries, and I'm respecting them."

"Good." He drank the rest of what little coffee remained from his mug, then stood, heading toward the kitchen. "Just know that you're gonna hate yourself every step of the way."

"It's better this way than the alternative."

"Can't say I disagree. You were starting to make me depressed."

Jamie threw a pillow at his brother's back, laughing when it hit Frank square between the shoulders. Frank turned around and looked at Jamie, then glanced down at the pillow on the ground. Then he made his way toward the kitchen once more.

"What? No retaliation?" Jamie asked.

"Just you wait."

"Ooooh, I'm so scared."

Frank smiled to himself as he rinsed out his mug.

Remembering, May 2, 2001

Minerva asked Rebecca to prepare giving a speech to the students, as all of the professors would be doing so on this day. All of the professors had some part in the last war, but hers was unique, and Minerva requested that she not hold back. That was why she would be the last to speak.

The day passed solemnly, all of the students respecting the enormity of the history that preceeded some of them into Hogwarts. There was a feast in the Great Hall that kicked off the ceremony. Minerva began, explaining how Hogwarts had changed during the war and how it was continually changing even today.

"Thankfully, I can say with great pride that this change is for the better," the Headmistress said, looking out over the students. "And you have yourselves to thank for this change. It is my strongest hope that we continue to move in what I feel is the right direction so that another Dark Lord may never try to pull us apart again."

She received a standing ovation, nor was she the last to have one. Each professor who spoke shared their personal experiences and their hopes for the future. Remus was the one speaking before Rebecca, and she couldn't help but biting her lower lip as her friend turned to the subject of Tonks.

"As some of you may be aware, my wife—a Hufflepuff..."

When he looked up to the Hufflepuff table, his mouth hung open a moment before he looked down at the podium again. Without a second thought, Rebecca stood and quickly approached him. She gently put her hand on his upper arm while he still looked down at the podium and waited. The hall was silent.

"Thank you," Remus whispered, meeting Rebecca's eyes momentarily before he turned to the students once more.

Rebecca removed herself from his arm and stood unobtrusively off to his side. Remus cleared his throat, but held back his tears.

"Tonks was a Hufflepuff just like any of you sitting at that table," Remus said. "She, along with the rest of us, fought because she wanted to make this world safe. And not just for us. She fought for the next generation, and not just for our own son. We fought for all of you, to ensure you would have a world free of oppression and institutionalized prejudice. And that's what we want to impart to you this evening."

Remus paused again and looked about the hall.

"We're not meaning to sound as though we're simply lecturing you about accomplishments or more terrifying times to make you thankful for the life you have now. We are telling you what happened as honestly as possible so that if any of you ever notice the signs, you will know to stand up and say something. To stop it, hopefully, before it gets out of hand."

He swallowed the lump in his throat.

"The main point I'd like to leave you with tonight is to be kind to one another, and to stand up for what you believe in. I am a firm believer that a little compassion can go quite a long way. Even if standing up to people you consider your friends, or your enemies, may seem difficult, I can assure you that you will regret not believing in yourselves first before others."

Remus nodded, then turned his back on the students. They stood once more, clapping. Rebecca reached for Remus' hand and held it for a second. He squeezed her hand in return before letting go and walking back to his seat.

Rebecca waited for the applause to die down before she placed herself behind the podium.

"Professor Lupin is going to be a difficult speech to follow," she said, her eyes sweeping slowly across the hall. "All of the professors will be. But the Headmistress asked that I speak to you last, because while each person tonight had their own experiences during the war, mine were..."

She took in a breath and let it out quickly. "Well, mine were something else altogether."

All of her mental notes suddenly left her head. Rebecca simply stood looking at the faces of the students she taught on a daily basis, eagerly waiting to hear her words. Perhaps some more than others. Her Slytherins were all ears, heads turned toward her and backs straight.

"Albus Dumbledore was one of the most intelligent people I've ever had the pleasure of knowing," Rebecca said. "He was a superb educator and administrator while working tirelessly to protect the wizarding world from Voldemort."

There was a miniscule reaction to the name still. It was growing fainter over time, but Rebecca was tired of hearing him referred to as the Dark Lord throughout the night.

"What I want all of you to understand is that while someone can be a great man or woman, that doesn't necessarily mean they're a good person all of the time. The Headmaster approached me when I was fifteen and asked me to spy for the Order of the Phoenix. At the time, I thought that was an honor. Today I realise that he used me, just as he used many people, including Harry Potter, to promote his own agenda. While his overall agenda would benefit the greatest number of people, he wasn't concerned about whether people like Harry or I lived or died in the process."

The stunned expressions on the faces closest to her, and the quiet chatter happening further back along the House tables, let Rebecca know that this wasn't common knowledge. Just as she expected.

"I have had to take great strides to work past many of the issues I've experienced since Voldemort's fall," Rebecca said, raising her voice to gather back the students' attention. "Some days are better than others. And for the days that I am not at my best, I owe all of you an apology. You deserve to know why that is. When the Headmistress first offered me a position here, I couldn't even fathom returning to the castle I'd spent most of my happiest memories in. The thought of entering onto the grounds nearly made me have panic attacks."

She looked to her Slytherins again, all of whom looked struck. The other students were now listening again, enraptured.

"That is what the man I came to look upon as a father reduced me to. Does this negate all of the good that he did for the wizarding world? No. What he did to the few of us cannot take away the fact that his schemes saved us all. However, it's not the honest truth, and history is only as useful to the next generation if its telling is kept as intact as possible."

Rebecca put on a forced smile. "Now you all know my secret. You know a huge secret, in fact, of a great man. He was obsessed with the idea of a greater good until the very end. That being said, the Headmaster knew of his weaknesses, and never sought a Ministry position because of this. And for this he should be lauded."

She shook her head. "I don't want you to think that my only aim was to shock you into a completely new image of Albus Dumbeldore. People are not black and white things that can be easily read. They are not all good and bad. You must understand the entire picture and make your own informed decision, and you should never let anyone tell you how you should think.

"And that is one of my ultimate points. Think for yourselves. Arm yourselves with knowledge. Work together. Don't judge based on House alone. I was one of the few Slytherins who remained to fight at the Battle of Hogwarts. I was the first muggleborn Slytherin in known history. The number of half-bloods in my House has grown, and I anticipate our diversity is only going to grow from here."

She smiled upon her table of students. "I am proud of the accomplishments of the Slytherins. No matter the setbacks brought upon that House, they are bound to come back even stronger than before."

Her eyes sought the rest of the students. "All of us have come back stronger from the war in some way or another. I want the students of Hogwarts to go out into the world more informed, more open-minded, and more accepting than any other graduating classes before. House rivalry is meant to be fun, not to create barriers. As the Sorting Hat told us during the years of Voldemort's threat, we are stronger when we are together than divided. And we are working toward that goal. We are growing stronger."

Rebecca looked out into the Great Hall, the eyes of all the students weighing on her.

"Thank you."

She quickly turned away, and she made it back to the staff table before the students erupted into applause. Rebecca turned to see and saw all of the students standing. She went back to her seat beside Remus and returned to it heavily.

She was grateful that Remus didn't attempt to touch her. The rest of the time, Rebecca looked at her hands, which she placed in her lap. Minerva made closing remarks that she didn't comprehend. She heard the students being dismissed for the evening and the heavy shuffling of their feet.

"Rebecca?"

Finally, she turned to see Minerva standing beside her. Remus stood just behind the Headmistress, waiting.

"Too much?"

Minerva smiled softly. "Just enough, my dear. Exactly what I was hoping you'd tell them."

Rebecca nodded. The rest of the professors had left them already, and most of the students were clear of the hall. She stood, turning to face Minerva as she held onto the back of her chair.

"I know what I want you to put on the memorial for Severus."

Minerva blinked. "Rebecca, there's no need to think about this now—"

"There's less than three months left, Minerva," Rebecca said.

"You can't give up hope yet, Becca," Remus said, stepping forward and reaching for her.

"It's something I've been thinking about." She raised her hand, holding off Remus'. He dropped it back to his side. "I talked it over with Harry, so he could help me with my objectivity about the whole thing. Of course I'm still hopeful that Severus comes back, but I'm not allowing myself to get my hopes up at this point. I can't afford to do that."

Minerva nodded. "I can understand. What have you decided?"

"Something Harry said, actually."

She reached into the pocket of her robes and drew out a sheet of parchment, then handed it to Minerva. In her neat handwriting, the inscription read:

Severus Snape

January 9, 1960 – August 1, 2001

Slytherin Head of House

Hogwarts Headmaster

Order of the Phoenix Spy

The Bravest Man Ever Known

Minerva's lips thinned considerably as she read the words. Then she looked up and met Rebecca's eyes. Minerva held up the parchment.

"This is something I think he would like, except for the last line."

"You're probably right, but that last part's for Harry and me."

"I think it's suiting," Remus said, smiling sadly.

Rebecca returned the expression. Minerva folded the parchment back up carefully and placed it in the pocket of her own robes.

"I'll arrange for this to be added to the memorial within the second week of August, if it comes to that, though I still hope it doesn't have to."

Rebecca nodded. "Thank you."

"I think it's time for all of us to turn in," Minerva said. "It's been a trying day."

All were in agreement. Minerva left the two of them in the Entrance Hall, and it took Rebecca a few extra minutes to assure Remus that he was fine to go home.

"I just need some time to myself. I'll be fine tomorrow morning. Promise."

She gave him a genuine smile, which was the only thing that allowed him to leave with a clear conscience. Rebecca returned to her quarters in the dungeons, her mind deep in thought over everything that had happened in the past few weeks.

The meeting between Jamie and the others had been more than awkward, and there was still tension in the air, particularly between he, Harry, and Draco. There was a stiff politeness among them all, but with Draco's worry over his father's absence left him in generally ill humour. This especially applied to people who attempted to out-Slytherin his closest friends. He had never been truly forgiving by nature, so his ire Rebecca was not too surprised about.

She entered her quarters and began to get ready for bed, still thinking.

It was Harry's anger that truly concerned her. Harry was not as easy-going as Ron, however it was in his nature to forgive. After all, he still sent letters back and forth with Dudley. Perhaps Harry felt he had some duty to protect her, or because he was the one who had wanted her and Severus to find happiness together in the first place. It could also simply be that Harry was changing his ways and she hadn't yet noticed, though that was even less likely than the former theories.

The only one who was not surprised had been Remus. He simply shook his head and told her that he knew she would be careful. But she knew he was concerned. He was ever the father figure, always looking out for them all; always concerned for their safety. However, he did his best to keep unsolicited advice to himself, and for that she was appreciative.

The past few weeks had been a trial nonetheless, and not simply because of the new tension in her circle of friends. Her hope had been fading as the August date loomed. And she knew she had gone through the different steps of the grieving phase. Disbelief. Anger. Sadness. Acceptance. This last stage was where she firmly sat, though the others passed through her on various days. But on most days, she felt just like herself.

That was satisfying in a way, but also made her feel something else entirely: guilt. This also happened when she found her thoughts during her downtime turning more to Jamie. Since the day she had forgiven him, the two had not been alone. It was more out of accident than any sort of planning on her part, but she decided this was for the better. She still wasn't certain how she could act without knowing for sure, not until the year mark.

Rebecca was so deep in thought she didn't feel the tears on her face until one fell onto her sheets. She wiped the stray tears away and settled further into her covers, forcing her mind to go blank in order to ready herself for sleep. It was early still, but she could do with the extra hours she might get out of tonight. The final weeks of the year were upon them, and her students' needs would grow all the more. For this she could only be grateful.

Return to Spinner's End, June 20, 2001

"There is a fine line between recklessness and courage / It's about time you understood which road to take. / It's a fine line, and your decision makes a difference. / Get it wrong, you'll be making a big mistake. / Come home, brother, all is forgiven. / We all cried when you were driven away. / Come home, brother, everything is better / Everything is better when you come home and stay. / Whatever's more important to you, / You've got to change what you wanna do. / Whatever's more important to be, / That's the view that you've gotta see. / There is a long way between choas and creation / If you don't say which one of these you're gonna choose. / It's a long way, and if every contradition seems the same, / It's a game that you're bound to lose..." – "Fine Line" by Paul McCartney

"I can't believe you're moving back in for the summer."

Draco stood beside her in the small backyard of the house in Spinner's End. In his hands he held two boxes stacked on top of one another, each filled with some of her possessions. Rebecca held two more boxes, with most of the items shrunk to fit more comfortably.

"I needed something to do with my time, and tending the garden was relaxing this past summer," Rebecca said as she looked upon it. "Merlin knows it needs the love."

She hadn't been able to come by as much as she would have liked. Mostly because whenever she thought about coming back to the house, her stomach dropped. But with the castle mostly deserted and her friends still working, she felt that it was the right thing to do. Draco had offered to go with her and help her settle her things, and she'd been more than happy to accept her help.

He snorted. "I don't remember you liking Herbology all that much."

Rebecca shrugged as she made her way toward the back door. "This is recreation. That was class."

He furrowed his brow when he looked at her. "But you loved all your classes."

"No one loves Herbology except for Neville and Pomona." She shifted the boxes to her right arm so she could grasp her wand. With a quick flick of her wrist, the back door clicked open.

"You said McGonagall was hiring him to fill her spot?"

Rebecca toed the door open a little wider, and the house seemed to give a deep sigh. Probably the stuffy air finding its escape route.

"Seems like it. I think he was the only applicant that was well qualified," she replied, taking a step into the kitchen.

"Who would have figured professorships would be hard to fill," Draco said flatly.

"It's all glamourous until you realise you'll be at school twenty-four hours a day for most of the year, surrounded by pre- and pubescent students and getting paid only moderately well for it. Who wouldn't want that?"

She smirked at him, and he chuckled.

"We'll just set these on the counters in here and start going through my things," Rebecca said.

They set to work taking objects around the house and placing them where they belonged before enlarging them. Her piano she she in the living room, filling an empty void and making the house feel that much more lived in.

"You're awful quiet," Draco said. They'd been working for about an hour with little need for anything other than directions between the two of them. "Are you sure you'll be all right?"

Rebecca shrugged. "I have to be."

He sighed. "You're crap at taking your own advice, Felan. I hope you realise."

She turned to face him. "This is more difficult than I originally thought," she said, crossing her arms over her chest. "But if I'm being honest, being back here feels right to me."

"I just don't want you going bonkers here by yourself."

"I'll bother you and Narcissa if I get lonely—don't you worry your pretty little head."

She took a step forward and patted him lightly on the cheek. Draco brushed her hand away quickly with a scowl that lacked most of its malice.

"I just hope Turner doesn't get any ideas of visiting during off hours."

Rebecca laughed. "Do you think I need a chaperone?"

"Don't muggles have some sort of system that rings the authorities when there are people snooping around who aren't supposed to?"

"Draco, I'm quite impressed with your sudden interest in the muggle world."

"Astoria suggested I might read up about it in my down time."

"Right. Blame your fiance for your budding interests. But for your information, I don't need an alarm system. That's what I have magic for."

"But that would be something he'd be expecting, wouldn't he?"

"I'm a little shocked you think Jamie and I are sneaking around like teenagers at Hogwarts," Rebecca said with a raised eyebrow. "Considering I haven't given him leave to make any sort of advances, and I'm not sure that I even want him to."

"Come off it. The way you look at him—" Draco shut his mouth quickly and looked away from her.

"Say it." Rebecca's voice was stern as she looked at him over the piano, gripping its edges tightly.

"You look at him like you did when you first looked at Severus," Draco said, his eyes meeting hers as he raised his head. "Back at Hogwarts, during our seventh year. Like you were looking at him for the first time."

She let the silence of the house fall between them for a few moments before she could answer.

"I won't deny that I feel something," Rebecca said quietly.

"And I don't think that you should. But I'm concerned—Potter and the rest and I—that you'll hurt yourself."

"There's always that risk. There was even more of a risk for getting hurt where Severus was concerned."

"Yes, but it's more complicated this time around."

"I'm touched that you care enough to talk about it with me, Draco. But I have to handle this myself."

She touched her fingers to the keys on the piano and held them down. The music was sudden, and she let the notes flow until they died out.

"You really shouldn't take your anger out on Jamie anymore," she said, lifting her fingers from the keys and looking to her friend.

"He came back and my father and Severus still haven't."

"Is that why you're angry?"

Draco moved around to the front of the piano and stood next to her. He shrugged a shoulder. "A little of that and the fact that he was an arse to you."

"I've already told him that multiple times."

"It's my own emotions to work out," Draco replied, placing his fingers on the keys before him. "You stick with your feelings and I'll work with mine." He held the keys down and looked over at her. "Deal?"

Rebecca smirked, placing her fingers back on the piano keys before her. She pushed them down. Draco let out a breath of air that was meant to be a laugh and placed his hands upon the keys, beginning to play an on-the-spot tune. Rebecca followed his lead. They played for a few minutes together, not speaking. They kept their eyes on the other's fingers as they played, giving over the leader and follower position as it suited them.

Eventually, Draco encroached playfully on her half of the piano to end the song. Rebecca laughed, allowing it. Once he took his hands off the keys, Rebecca leaned against his shoulder, resting her head upon it.

"You're all right, Malfoy."

"Better than you certainly, Felan. You're rusty."

Half-heartedly, she pushed him and glared. Her laughter gave her away.

"I think you've got some more to unpack, and I eventually have to get home," he said, pointing toward the kitchen.

"I forgot that other people have schedules in the summer."

They made their way back to the kitchen, and Rebecca felt a bit lighter even in the stuffy house. She'd open the windows after Draco left to make room for the fresh air, then begin her deep clean of every room.

The plan helped her to smile and hum muggle tunes under her breath. Draco asked after them, which prompted her to suggest a trip to the music store in town.

"Another time," he said.

"Wouldn't Astoria be impressed with how immersed you're becoming?"

"Mother might have a heart attack," Draco grumbled.

Rebecca smiled. "You don't give her enough credit sometimes. She's come a long way."

"We all have in many ways. Who'd have thought I'd ever be talking to Harry bloody Potter after Hogwarts?"

She chuckled. "I'm even surprised at that. And more that the both of you think so much alike."

"I draw the line there, so you watch yourself, Felan."

The smirk he had didn't let her to worry.

"Speaking of, Harry and the rest are coming over this weekend for dinner. Do you, your mother, and Astoria want to come?"

"Won't it be a bit cramped for all that?"

Rebecca shook her head. "Not after I move the table out into the yard and transfigure it to be a bit longer."

"Is Turner coming?"

"Both Turners, yes. The usual people."

"I'll have to think about it."

"Just give me a day's notice so I know how much to cook."

"If you're actually cooking, I might save myself the stomach ache, thanks."

She hit him lightly with a hand towel. "I'm not that bad."

Draco looked pointedly away from her.

"Arse," she muttered.

He didn't reply, continuing to rearrange the books on the shelf before him. They worked in peaceful silence until it was time for Draco to take his leave. When Rebecca closed the back door after him and watched him Disapparate, she listened to the house settling around her.

"Maybe I should get a telly."

Her voice nearly echoed in the kitchen. She turned around to look at it, noticing the fine layer of dust upon everything, except where they'd disturbed the counters during their unpacking. With a nod of her head, Rebecca put her hair up and out of her face and set to work opening all the windows in the house. Then she set to work cleaning the kitchen.

She didn't notice the time until the sunlight dimmed to the point that she had to turn on the light in the study. She'd only managed to clean the kitchen, hallway, and had begun working on the study when a knock came on the back door. Rebecca's brows furrowed as she walked back to answer it, hand gripping her wand tightly.

A smile formed when she saw Harry and Jamie at the door. Quickly, she opened it and let them in, hugging each man in turn. Harry held out a bottle of wine. Rebecca took it and looked over the label.

"Thank you!"

"I figured I'd stop by for a few minutes after work to check in on you," Harry said.

"I told him I'd tag along," said Jamie with a grin as he rolled himself to the middle of the kitchen.

Harry turned his hands so they were palm-up, a clear showing that he hadn't invited Jamie along. Rebecca gave a shake of her head to indicate it was all right.

"Can I offer you both a glass?" she asked, looking between the two of them.

Both responded in the affirmative.

"Then you're in luck, because I just cleaned everything in the kitchen this afternoon."

She got down three wine glasses and poured a bit of wine for each of them. They each held up their glasses and clinked them together.

"Glad to see you're keeping busy," Jamie said.

"The place hasn't been lived in for quite a few months, so some elbow grease was needed," Rebecca replied.

"Remus indicated you seem to favour cleaning by hand," said Harry.

"I'm sure he did more than mention it," Rebecca said with a smirk.

"He may have been worried when I said it."

"He's such a mother hen. He's always worried about me."

She smiled fondly as she drank the remainder of the wine in her glass. She had only poured a little bit and didn't plan on drinking any more, at least not until she'd eaten something.

"Ginny wanted me to invite you for dinner tonight." He turned to Jamie. "And you're welcome to come as well, Jamie."

"Sounds like fun to me." Jamie looked up at Rebecca.

"That's kind of you both, Harry, but I'm fine here," she answered.

"C'mon, Becca. More cleaning can wait until tomorrow," said Jamie.

"I'd really need to shower and I'd hate to make you both wait."

"We can go on ahead and let you get ready so you don't feel rushed," Harry said. "It's really not a problem. And you haven't been round to our place since Christmas."

She considered them both for a moment. Both men watched her expectantly: Jamie leaning forward and Harry encroaching upon her personal space. She sighed.

"All right. I should be there in about thirty minutes."

They both grinned.

"Great!" Harry said as he gave her another hug. "We'll see you soon."

He turned to make his way out the back door. Jamie lingered for a moment, as if unsure of something he wanted to say. Once Harry reached the door and turned back to call to him, Jamie simply smiled at her and moved toward Harry. Rebecca locked the door behind them and went to get ready.

She actually made it to Grimmauld Place in under the thirty minutes she told Harry. Ginny greeted her warmly and offered her more wine to drink, which Rebecca gratefully accepted. After all, she was the only one of them that didn't have to go to work in the morning.

The evening between the friends was full of laughter, and Rebecca felt her spirits lifting throughout the evening. It was very freeing, to not feel her mind being pulled in so many different ways at once. To be able to speak freely, tell her stories of her different students from the past year, recount the Quidditch matches, and hear some stories in return from them all. Jamie even recounted a hilariously awkward moment between Minster Smith and Kingsley that had Rebecca wiping her eyes of tears.

Their time together was winding down, and Harry was standing and offering to Apparate her home.

"You don't think I can do it myself?" she asked. "It was only a couple of glasses."

"I'd rather be safe than have you splinched."

Rebecca suspected he wanted to make sure she got back to the house on Spinner's End alone. While the offer was sweet, it wasn't necessary.

"I'm fine, Harry, though I appreciate the offer," she said with a gentle smile.

"I can make certain she gets home all right," Jamie said. "I only had the one glass during dinner, so I'll be all right, Dad."

He smirked at Harry, who attempted to laugh it off. Harry glanced at Rebecca, and she shook her head at the both of them.

"You're all impossible," she said.

"You may as well let one of them take you back," said Ginny, reaching over to give Rebecca a hug and kiss on the cheek. "Otherwise we'll be here all night."

"Fine," Rebecca replied, returning the gesture to Ginny. "Come on, Jamie. Bye, Harry."

The two shared another hug. He frowned when she let him go, and she smiled, giving him a quick kiss on the cheek.

"You worry too much. Be careful or you'll end up like Remus."

"You say it like it's a bad thing," he said with the faintest hint of a smile.

"There you are."

She smiled and Harry chuckled. The couple came out into the back to see them off. Rebecca and Jamie Apparated seperately and ended up safely in the backyard of the house on Spinner's End. She raised her arms and indicated the yard around her.

"Ta-da..."

Jamie chuckled. "I was starting to think he didn't want me to be alone with you."

"Pretty sure that was it."

"I guess they're not over everything that happened."

"No," Rebecca said, walking to and sitting on the stone bench.

Jamie followed her and positioned himself in front of her, leaving enough space between the both of them for comfort. He nodded.

"Not that I don't deserve it," he muttered.

He looked about at the backyard for a moment before looking to Rebecca once more.

"I feel like you've been avoiding me."

She shook her head. "Not really. The end of term is always busy. But I have been purposefully not allowing us to be alone."

"I can't say that I don't deserve that, either."

Rebecca smirked. "At least you're self-aware enough occasionally."

"Ouch." He placed his hands over his heart.

She chuckled, and he smiled, letting his hands back into his lap.

"I do want to know how you're doing. Honestly," he said.

"Honestly? Fine right now. Trying not to think about everything the rest of the time. Tonight helped with that. Maybe I'll have to see what Ron and Hermione are doing tomorrow night."

"I'll try not to crash that one. I don't think Harry was pleased with me tonight, so I can't imagine Ron and Hermione would be much better about it."

"It was a little rude."

"You could have banished me at any point and I'd have gone quietly."

"I know. But it was fun watching Harry squirm."

It was Jamie's turn to laugh. "Ginny seemed all right."

"She thinks Harry's reaction is silly, and I appreciate her for it. I am an adult, after all. I can choose who I spend my time with and what I do with my life."

"He and Draco are protective of you. And Remus. I get it." He shrugged. "You've even got my own brother on your side. Talk about rude."

Rebecca smiled. "It's not my fault I'm so charming."

"No, I suppose it's not."

He looked at her and met her eyes, and both of them were silent for just a moment. Rebecca quickly shifted her gaze downward.

"Have you heard any other news about a prosthetic?"

"I think I like the chair. It's grown on me."

She nodded. "I can understand that."

"I still have time to change my mind, of course, and I might yet. But for now this works for me."

He patted the armrest for emphasis.

"I'm sure you'll do what's best." She nodded toward the house. "I should go inside and let you get home so you can get some rest. I'll send Harry a Patronus telling him I'm not splinched."

She stood, then leaned over to give him a hug. Then she hesitated. His expression dropped minutely, and Rebecca realised she hurt him with her sudden delay. She put a hand on his shoulder so she could lean forward and kiss his cheek quickly.

"Good night, Jamie."

Pulling away was difficult, but he didn't stop her. She made her way to the house and went inside, never turning around until she was behind the closed door. He waited until she was inside before he Disapparated.

Rebecca shut her eyes, leaning against the door and chastised herself for her actions. But the feeling of his cheek under her lips lingered.

A Party for Bill & Fleur, July 7, 2001

"I know you loved him a long time ago / Even now in my arms you still want him I know. / But, darling, this time let your memories die. / When you hold me tonight, don't close your eyes. / Don't close your eyes. Let it be me. / Don't pretend it's him in some fantasy. / Darling, just once, let yesterday go. / You'll find more love than you've ever known. / Just hold me tight when you love me tonight. / Don't close your eyes. / Maybe I've been a fool holding on all this time / Lyin' here in your arms, knowing he's in your mind. / But I keep hoping some day that you'll see the light. / Let it be me tonight. Don't close your eyes. / Don't close your eyes. Let it be me. / Don't pretend it's him in some fantasy. / Darling, just once, let yesterday go. / You'll find more love than you've ever known. / Just hold me tight when you love me tonight. / Don't close your eyes." – "Don't Close Your Eyes" by Keith Whitley, as sung by Jake Worthington

The little cottage was full to bursting with so many people. Fleur and Bill had invited them all over for a celebration, which many had already guessed before arriving. When the couple stood before them all after dinner, Victorie held between them, everyone cheered at the announcement of another child on its way.

Too many toasts later, and many of the guests were waiting out their buzz before they could leave. Rebecca had already offered to Apparate a few people home, but no one wanted to leave the merriment. So now she found herself perched on the arm of the couch in the living room, Harry, Ginny, Ron, and Hermione squished together on the couch beside her. Jamie was just across from her, speaking with Remus. Andromeda had taken Teddy home a little while ago to get him to bed, insisting that Remus stay and enjoy himself.

Rebecca was surprised that Remus was drinking as much as he already had. He wasn't one to overly imbibe, but he was happy enough, so she let him be. She was quiet for the most part, enjoying the company of her friends and the happiness of the house overall.

She noticed Charlie in the corner playing with the radio. He nodded and quickly turned up the sound. The Weird Sisters boomed into existence. He grinned, making his way across the room and offering his hand out to Rebecca. With a laugh, she took it and let him pull her up and into a dance. The others on the couch quickly followed their lead, dancing in the areas around the furniture where they could.

While dancing with Charlie, Rebecca spared a glance Jamie's way and found him watching her. Meanwhile, Remus was tapping his foot along with the beat of the music. She smiled at Jamie, but quickly turned her attention back to her partner. With the switch in the song came a switch in partners, and Charlie moved to dance with his sister, leaving her with Harry.

He was in fine spirits, singing along to the next song loudly and off-key. Rebecca giggled at him as they kept up with the beat. Now was not a time to be upset, as she'd spent most of the day with the feeling. The feelings were unproductive, even if they felt appropriate. Anxiety always felt just moments away from gripping her with each passing day.

There was less than a month now before she would have to execute Severus' Will.

The thought made her falter momentarily, but Harry was there to keep her on pace with the song. Her smile didn't come back as easily. With the changing of the song, Rebecca was able to keep herself together when Ginny pulled Remus into the throng of dancing friends. George had pushed the furniture to the walls with a simple flick of his wand, bringing Angelina to the floor along with most of the other party goers.

Rebecca turned to find Jamie still on the edge of the wall, hands in his lap as he watched them all with a smile. Quickly she went to him, holding out her hand.

"Come on!"

He shook his head, holding up his hand. "You go have fun. I'll get in the way."

"Not the right answer!" said George, suddenly beside Rebecca. "It's a celebration for my brother and his wife, Turner. Let's go!"

He motioned toward the impromptu dance floor, where even Fleur, Bill, Molly, and Arthur had begun to mingle with the others as the music continued to blare.

"All right, all right!" Jamie said, holding up his hands in surrender.

Rebecca grinned as Jamie wheeled himself out onto the floor. She danced beside him as he moved his upper body with the beat of the song.

"I'm starting to reconsider that prosthetic!" he yelled to her over the noise.

She chuckled as he twirled himself in a circle.

Rebecca lost track of the time as the songs continued to play, Charlie and George switching the stations every so often. Different partners came and went before her, and Rebecca even danced with Ginny and Hermione for a few minutes.

No matter where Jamie was in the crowd of her friends, Rebecca somehow managed to meet his eyes. He always seemed to be watching her, though she was certain he couldn't be looking at her the entire time.

What seemed like too soon, people were beginning to excuse themselves to return home. Harry and Ginny offered to Apparate Remus home, which he accepted. Soon it was George and Angelina, then Ron and Hermione. Finally, Charlie, Molly, and Arthur were saying their goodbyes.

"I suppose it's time I take my leave, too," Rebecca said, approaching the host and hostess. "Get party."

"We'll have to make it tradition in our family to have a dance party to mark each pregnancy," Bill said with a grin.

Jamie also made his goodbyes along with Rebecca, as they were the only remaining attendees still there. They found themselves outside, on top of the hill on which the cottage sat, listening to the ocean.

"It's beautiful out," Jamie said.

"I could listen to this all night."

"Roll me down to the beach?"

He gave her a mischievous grin.

She smiled. "Sure."

With a bit of creative wandwork, they were able to get him down onto the beach and closer to the water. Rebecca finally plopped down onto the sand beside Jamie, a few metres away from where the waves licked the shore.

They sat in companionable silence. Jamie looked down at Rebecca. The moonlight washed over everything, though it was faint since it was waning. She didn't look up at him, instead watching the ocean attempt to reach for them, fall just short, and retreat into itself.

"You ever think about having kids, Rebecca?"

"Did anyone tell you what happened the last time someone asked me that question?"

"I heard something about it."

She turned her head so she could look at him. "Then you know it's a touchy subject."

"But appropriate for what we were celebrating tonight."

Rebecca looked back to the ocean and listened to the waves momentarily. "Yeah, I've thought about it. Less so over the past year."

Jamie nodded. He stared at her before speaking again.

"You don't want to go home."

"What was your first clue?"

Jamie wasn't sure how to respond, so he kept his mouth shut and waited for her.

"I was trying to have a good time tonight so I could balance out how depressed I've felt today," Rebecca said.

The ocean was inky black, melding with the night sky almost seemlessly. The white caps of the waves broke the illusion.

"I don't know that I can take much more of waiting."

Jamie looked at her.

"You're always stronger than you think you are."

"I've had to be strong for a long time," Rebecca said. "I'm just tired. And I can't sleep. I haven't been able to for a couple of nights."

"Are the nightmares back?"

"Yeah. And my insomnia."

"I'm sorry."

She shook her head, still not looking at him. Jamie wanted to offer any comfort that he could, but held his tongue. Ever since she had forgiven him, he had kept his word to her and let her dictate all of the actions between the two of them. He was having a harder time of it now than he'd had in the previous months. He had betrayed her trust in a huge way before and didn't want to again, knowing that she wouldn't forgive him a second time.

"Could I stay with you and Frank tonight?"

Jamie blinked, finding her suddenly looking at him.

"You know you're always welcome. Frank's at work until late tonight, just to let you know."

"That's fine. Thanks."

She gave him a small smile—a sad one. She stood, wiping the sand from her lower body. She took out her wand and Apparated them both to the alley beside his building. When they reached his front door, Jamie opened the door and let her enter first. She immediately went toward the couch and sat down.

"I'll stay out here," she said. "I'll probably be awake anyway, so don't try to be chivalrous and make me take your bed."

"I won't fight you," Jamie replied with a shake of his head. "I'll get you an extra pillow and blanket in case you do wanna sleep."

He made his way to the linen closet in the hallway and was back within a minute, the items in question on his lap.

"I got a sheet if you want to put it over the couch," he said. "Might make it a little more comfortable."

"Sure."

She set to work on fitting the sheet over the couch, then spreading out the blanket. Jamie fluffed the pillow and put it at the head of the couch. When he glanced her way, there were tears falling down her cheeks. She dabbed at them quickly and turned her head away.

"Sorry."

"Becca–"

"I was trying not to be a weepy mess, I swear."

"It's fine."

She sat on the couch with her back to him. Jamie frowned at her, then went to retrieve the box of tissues from the kitchen. He held them out to her.

"Here," he said quietly.

Rebecca looked over her shoulder briefly and took the box, quickly looking away from him. He waited patiently as she wiped her eyes and blew her nose.

She put her face in her hands in an attempt to get a hold of herself. Being here was a stupid idea and she knew it, but the feeling of being completely alone was a terrifying thought. She should have gone back with Harry and Ginny, or even paid a visit to the Malfoys. It wasn't so late still, and they would have been up and welcomed her to stay with them until the wait was over. But she had wanted to go home with Jamie, had known she'd wanted to when they were the only two left at Bill and Fleur's.

Her thoughts, along with the slow building of her guilt and sadness, finally broke her. Her hand barely stifled the sob that found its way from her mouth. After that, she let them come.

He was there, reaching toward her and pulling her head to his shoulder. He held her tightly, one arm wrapped around her shoulders and a hand in her hair, stroking it from her face. Nonsense sounds of comfort came from his lips.

"I'm sorry," she said, furiously trying to wipe her eyes. She sniffed heavily.

"You're exhausted," Jamie replied, pushing back her hair and handing her another tissue, "and hysterical because of it. It's normal."

She nodded, taking the tissue from his and wiping her face.

"Why don't you use my bathroom to take a shower or a bath and collect yourself?"

"All right."

"Come on, I'll make sure you've got everything."

He moved toward his room, going into the en suite and opening the cabinet below the sink. He pulled out a towel and a box of soap, then set them on the counter. Rebecca stood just behind him at a distance. She blew her nose for what she hoped was the final time. Jamie turned to face her.

"Take as long as you need. I'm a heavy sleeper." He smiled, then moved to get out of her way.

Rebecca put her hand on his shoulder as he moved past her. "Thank you, Jamie."

"Of course."

His smile seemed to penetrate her. Rebecca couldn't bear it for longer than a couple of seconds, so she quickly disappeared into the bathroom. She opted quickly for a bath, and began to fill the tub.

Minutes later saw her sinking as far into the water as the tub's depth would allow. She let out a quiet sigh, then held her breath. Her face sank below the surface and she stayed there, letting the heat wash over her skin. Rebecca pushed her head above the water once more and wiped it from her face and opened her eyes.

While it was a garden tub, it was still a tight fit because of her height. But that was well enough. The water soothed her mental state along with her muscles. The steam and heat mingled together and helped her to breathe more easily, and soon her stuffy nose was non-existant.

She laid in the tub with her eyes closed, head resting on the back of the tub. Rebecca practiced meditating, a pursuit she hadn't attempted in quite some time. Her mind she was able to clear relatively easily, but keeping it clear in the silence was much more difficult. But she kept at it, sitting in silence and stillness until she finally noticed the water was growing cold.

Actually, it was rather uncomfortably cold. While she hadn't fallen asleep, she hadn't realised how much time had passed.

She reached for the drain and pulled the stopper up, resting it on the side of the tub before standing. Rebecca quickly wrapped herself in the towel and dried off, then used a spell to dry her hair. With some more flicks of her wand and words mumbled under her breath, she was able to transfigure her clothing from the party into decent enough clothes for attempting sleep. She turned the light off in the bathroom and descended into complete darkness.

So he'd turned off the light in his room, which meant he was probably sleeping. Quietly, she opened the door so she wouldn't disturb him. When she stepped out into his room, Rebecca heard soft snores coming from the bed. The door was cracked open; she could see the light from the living room they'd left on. She smiled fondly.

She thought back to the first night she tried to sleep without Severus beside her, after growing accustomed to his weight on the bed next to her. She'd reverted back to her uneasy sleeping patterns that she thought she was done with after the first month of his disappearance. Rebecca looked at the figure on the bed. He was slowly coming into form with the faint light from the living room.

Maybe she could actually sleep with someone in the bed beside her.

Immediately she shook her head at the idea. That was pressing everything much too far.

But it was just sleeping.

Before she could second-guess herself, Rebecca walked toward the bed. Carefully, she lifted the covers and sat on the edge. Jamie's breathing didn't change. Rebecca stretched out beside him and placed the covers around her and waited. He still slept. She let out the breath she'd been holding and closed her eyes.

Just as she felt herself falling asleep, Jamie rolled over. Rebecca's eyes shot open as his hand landed on her stomach. His snores faltered, then there was silence.

"Becca?"

His voice was groggy from sleep, but the confusion was obvious.

"I just wanted to be able to sleep," she whispered.

She felt his arm tense. Rebecca reached down and held his hand in hers, keeping him from moving from her. Neither of them moved.

Finally, she felt his fingers flex. Rebecca let his hand go for a moment, and he quickly put his over top of hers and squeezed gently before settling neutrally on her waist.

"I can't be a substitute forever, Rebecca."

His voice was so quiet, she wasn't sure he'd actually spoken. But the words hung in the dark.

"I know very well who you are, Jamie."

Silence.

"I just don't want there to be any confusion."

Rebecca bit her lower lip.

"It's not fair to me."

"I don't know that I can make that decision right now," Rebecca said.

"And I don't want to force it on you right now. But I know you value honesty, so I'm being honest about how I'm feeling."

His fingers tightened around hers.

"You have no idea how hard it is not to pull you closer right now."

Rebecca swallowed the lump in her throat.

"Do you know why I'm here? Why I was crying earlier?"

Jamie opened his mouth to say the first thing that popped into his head. He paused, thinking.

"No. Tell me."

"I thought I was through all the phases of grief. That I'd spent long enough mourning and I could move on once August first came. All I've been able to think about is how I want to spend more time with you, but when I get around to making the plans, there's Severus. And then I start the process all over again."

Jamie remained quiet, wanting her to finish her thoughts. He was surprised when she began turning over to face him, so he set his hand on the bed between them and waited for her to settle. There was still a foot of space between them, something that seemed insurmountable.

"But I keep thinking that if he was still–"

She shut her eyes and closed her mouth, then took in a breath and continued. Rebecca didn't dare break eye contact with him.

"He would have sent something to me by now. To let me know. That's what I keep thinking."

"He might be afraid you'd find where he sent it from and come after him," Jamie replied in a whisper.

"I've also thought about that. But I know if I'd left, I wouldn't have been able to resist letting him know I was all right. That I was thinking of him."

She grew silent again, looking down at the sheets. Jamie couldn't take his eyes from her.

"So what are you saying?"

Her eyes flicked up to meet his.

"I'm saying that I don't think he's going to come back. That I have to live with not knowing what happened to him or to Lucius."

"And that's why you're here," he said evenly. "Why you were crying. Because you're letting him go."

"I think that I have to. He wanted me to be happy. I'm not happy holding on, having all of these emotions all at once. Always feeling like I'm inadequate, or that I'm not acting like I should be."

"Everyone grieves in their own way. There's not a right way to do it."

"I know. You've all been so reassuring that I'm not crazy."

Jamie simply looked at her. "You don't have to give him up if you're not ready. Not for my sake."

"I haven't fully given him up, and that's why all of this has been difficult. I don't know that I can ever fully give him up. And that's what would be unfair to you."

"You're not keeping me from any other prospects, I can assure you."

She scoffed and looked away. "You can't know that for sure."

"Nothing is ever certain, and that's why we're both here. What I do know is that I'm willing to wait as long as it takes for you. And, honestly, that's probably the scariest thing I've ever told someone."

"What if I told you not to wait for me?" Rebecca asked.

Jamie shook his head. "I'm not sure I could follow those instructions."

His voice was barely above a whisper. Rebecca considered him for a long time.

"You're sweet when you want to be, Turner. You're lucky I'm not a normal Slytherin or I'd chew you up and spit you back out."

He smirked, then chuckled. "You're a terrible Slytherin."

She propped herself up on her elbow. "Don't make me smack you. I'm Slytherin Head of House. You can't be any more Slytherin."

"Forgive me, your majesty," he said, holding his hands up in surrender.

He smiled at her, and Rebecca realised she had closed some of the distance between them when she sat up on her elbow. Her stomach fluttered with the increasing beat of her heart. Slowly, she leaned toward him.

Jamie's eyes widened, then he reached for her and put a hand on her shoulder, holding her in place. Rebecca paused, gaze intent upon his face.

He gave a little shake of his head. "Are you sure?"

"You already said nothing's certain, Jamie," Rebecca answered. "Don't move."

She pushed against his hand and found that his grip was slack. He let her close the distance between them until her lips pressed against his. Rebecca simply waited, enjoying the feeling of warmth coming from him. Then she pressed forward with her tongue, and her entrance was granted.

Their breathing grew heavy with the speed of the kiss. She put a hand against his cheek to brace herself and to keep his head in place. Other than his mouth, Jamie didn't move to touch her, evidently following her final order. She broke their contact and rested her forehead against his, eyes closed. Rebecca took in a shaky breath and let it out slowly.

"Please let me move again."

His words were breathless, and she couldn't help but let out a quick laugh. She pulled back to look at his face. His eyes watched her intently.

"You're very literal now. It's endearing."

"I take back what I said about you not being a Slytherin," he said quickly.

"That's better. Go ahead."

His hand buried in her hair and drew her close once more. He did nothing else except hold her to him, rolling over onto his back to allow his other arm to close about her waist and pull her flush against his side. Rebecca settled her head onto his chest easily.

"Is this all right?" he asked.

"It's different."

She felt him nod. "I agree."

The silence fell over them again, and neither wanted to break it. Rebecca ran her hand along his chest, still covered with his T-shirt. He stroked her exposed shoulder.

The front door unlocking sounded like a backfiring curse.

"If we pretend like we're asleep, we can save that conversation until the morning," Jamie whispered.

"Deal."

The door opened and Frank's heavy bootsteps echoed in the living room. The door closed, and he turned around, then the footsteps paused. Rebecca knew he was taking in the made-up couch. Slowly, his footsteps sounded across the hardwood floors until they drew closer. She shut her eyes just as the door opened.

While Frank looked in on them for less than ten seconds, it felt as though he stared for an eternity. Finally, Rebecca heard him grab the door handle and pull the door completely shut. His now muffled footsteps retreated to his room toward the back of the flat.

Jamie's chest bounced with his quiet chuckles. "We're certain to get that judgmental stare of his when we come out tomorrow morning."

"As long as he's got coffee or tea, he can think what he wants."

Jamie laughed harder, covering his mouth to stifle the sound. Rebecca smiled and closed her eyes. Eventually Jamie settled down and continued stroking down her shoulder to her elbow, repeating the soothing action.

"Thank you for understanding," she whispered, her voice heavy.

"You're in charge, Rebecca. That hasn't changed."

She couldn't help but smile.

Harry's Birthday, July 31, 2001

The past month had been better for Rebecca. While she still spent a lot of her time at the house in Spinner's End maintaining the garden, keeping the house clean, and even sleeping there, she and Jamie had spent more of their free time together. For the majority of the time, it was as though nothing had changed between them. However, Rebecca would occasionally lean in to give him a kiss when they were alone, or even hold his hand among their friends.

She told Jamie she wouldn't be spending the night any longer, not until she was ready. This he understood, and the two were comfortable with the boundaries in place. The others had noticed the change come over them and were accepting.

Harry's birthday found them all at Grimmauld Place, celebrating the occasion. Rebecca entered to find the house already full of their friends. She smiled at Harry.

"I'm not use to being the last to arrive."

"First time for everything," he said with a smile. "I'm glad you came."

He gave her a tight hug, then held her at arm's length.

"How are you?"

"Anxious, but don't let me ruin your good time."

"Just let me know if you're ready to leave. I promise I won't be offended."

"And miss you opening my present?" Rebecca asked, taking it from her pocket and enlarging it. She handed it to him with a smile. "Never."

He chuckled and took it from her, kissing her cheek in thanks.

"I think there's some debate going on about a possible rule broken at Ginny's practice," Harry said. "Care to weigh in?"

She shrugged. "As much as I can, I suppose. I've only reffed a couple of matches."

"Come on."

Rebecca followed him and found Ginny, Ron, George, Charlie, and Draco in the midst of the argument. Harry helped her interject and had Ginny explain the situation, and then the argument took off once more.

The debate wasn't close to being settled when she felt a presence at her side. Rebecca turned to find Jamie waiting patiently for acknowledgement. She grinned, placing a hand on his shoulder.

"I think this'll take a while."

"Just wanted to let you know I was here if you needed anything," he replied with a smile.

He left her, and when she turned back to the rest of the group, she found differing reactions. George was trying to hide his smirk behind his glass of firewhiskey. Draco was fastidiously studying his nails. Charlie, Ron, and Ginny were still arguing. Harry was pointedly looking at his wife and brothers-in-law.

Rebecca pinched the bridge of her nose. "You're all impossible."

"We're just glad ickle Becky's feeling better," George said, reaching forward and pinching her cheek.

"All right, that's enough," she replied, batting his hand away.

"What's happened?" Charlie asked.

"Nothing," Rebecca answered. "I think Ginny was saying something about presidence."

"Right!"

It wasn't difficult to keep the conversation back on course. Soon it was time for dinner, and Rebecca seated herself between Jamie and Hermione. The conversation around the meal was pleasant, though Rebecca found herself eyeing the clock nervously every few minutes. It didn't make time go any faster, though she jumped when the time struck eight.

Hermione put a hand on her shoulder and gave her an encouraging smile.

"I'm fine," Rebecca said with a quick smile.

"I know."

In truth, Rebecca felt as though she would lose her last meal at any moment. She hoped the party would go through the midnight hour so she wouldn't spend the rest of the more than twenty-four hours remaining staring at the clock in her room.

A hand on her left knee brought her out of her thoughts. Jamie was speaking with Charlie, who sat on his other side, but had clearly paid attention to her brief conversation with Hermione enough to sense her distress. She put her hand over his for a moment before removing it. His hand went back to the table after she removed hers.

Rebecca had always known the kindness in Jamie ran deep, but she hadn't been sure how much it could withstand. He hadn't crossed her once since her birthday, not even on something small. She knew from experience that he was no pushover, but he had ultimately changed his more nosey and persistent qualities in deference to her. She watched him catch himself over the past couple of weeks and correct what he was going to say or do when he was around her. This change even extended to the others.

It was a nice change, Rebecca had to admit. While she enjoyed the other side of Jamie, this seemed a very mature decision for him to have made. And it certainly took a lot of the pressure from her.

The rest of the meal she spent talking to the others around her instead of stealing glances at the clock. It would only make her more anxious. With dinner finished, she offered to help clean up while Molly got dessert ready. A small group effort saw the dishes cleaned in record time.

Then there was the singing, which Harry insisted she lead. Rebecca hadn't felt much like singing in a long time, but she acquiesced to the birthday boy's desire. The others followed her lead on the simple Happy Birthday song, and Rebecca felt her spirits lifting with each note she sang.

Everyone made their way back upstairs so they could allow dinner and dessert to settle before opening presents. It was actually Bill who urged Harry to begin opening his gifts just after the clock struck nine.

"We don't want to keep Fleur out too late," Bill said by way of apology.

"Of course. No worries."

Rebecca stayed on the fringes while Harry opened his gifts. Draco stood beside her, sipping the wine he'd brought for everyone.

"You're making me nervous, Felan. Stop looking at the bloody clock."

"Sorry," she replied, turning to face him.

He rolled his eyes and sighed. "I'll need to get home soon to be with Mother."

"Don't you think she'll be asleep by midnight?"

The glass stopped halfway to Draco's mouth as he turned to look at her. "Can you honestly tell me you're going to sleep at all tonight?"

She shook her head.

"We'll wait it out together," he told her, eyes going back to the main group in the living room. "You're welcome to wait with us, you know."

"I appreciate it. But if he's coming back, I think he'll head home."

Draco gave a curt nod. "You're welcome over after that, too. Father had something in his Will for you."

He was looking in her direction, but staring just past her, his lips set in a fine line. Rebecca reached toward him and looped her arm through his, drawing herself against her friend.

"Severus has something for you in his, too."

Draco furrowed his brows and looked at her. Rebecca gave him a small smile.

"Don't get your hopes up. I don't think you'll like it."

He scoffed. "Figures."

Rebecca chuckled. They watched Harry lean over to give Ginny a kiss, presumably after having opened her gift to him.

"We set the date."

Rebecca turned her head toward Draco. "Really?"

"I decided it wasn't worth waiting any longer. And if we wanted to get on with things, we'd need to give Mother sufficient time to plan."

He turned his body slightly so he could look at her.

"I want you to stand up with me."

"You know I'll be there, no matter what."

Another curt nod and turned from her again. "Full disclosure, Astoria's asking her sister to be in the wedding on her side."

Rebecca bit her lower lip to keep her thoughts to herself. "I'll take solace in the fact she wasn't as bad as Pansy."

"Don't worry. Everyone will behave. It's a mixed wedding, after all. So many new friends to invite."

Rebecca followed Draco's even gaze to Jamie, who approached them. She gripped his forearm gently and patted his shoulder.

"Thought I'd make my way over and see if I could get you two anything," Jamie said, coming to a stop just before the Slytherins.

"I'd say a stiff drink, but I have to get home soon," Draco replied, not looking at Jamie.

"Fair enough. Rebecca?"

"I'm fine, thank you."

She smiled at him. He looked between Rebecca and Draco and gave a quick nod.

"I'll be over here if either of you need anything."

Draco ignored him, taking another sip of his wine. Rebecca mouthed "thank you" before Jamie retreated.

"It must be nice," Draco said.

She looked at him. "What?"

"To set aside someone so easily."

"Don't start this with me here," Rebecca whispered harshly.

"Defensive, are we?"

"You're being a prat."

She dropped his arm and took a step away from him. Draco set his empty wine glass on the nearest end table and turned to her once more.

"But you're not denying that's what you've done."

"You know how hard this has been on the both of us," Rebecca said quietly, motioning between the two of them. "Don't try to diminish what I'm going through just because you're feeling vulnerable."

"You're the one with more to lose here, Felan."

"And you need to get out of here before you lose yourself another friend, Malfoy."

The tears she wasn't allowing to shed stung her eyes as she stared him down. Draco met her gaze before he finally blinked and turned away without another word. Rebecca took in a deep breath and let it out slowly, trying to calm herself.

"You okay?"

She turned to find Frank standing in the corridor behind her and to her right. He must have stepped off to the restroom and come back at the exact wrong moment.

"Depends. How much of that did you hear?"

"Enough to see your friend is hurting and taking it out on you."

He stepped forward and leaned against the wall beside her. Rebecca sighed.

"Yeah, that's about the long and short of it."

"Don't you let him feel bad about what you've done. You've only done what you thought was right."

"Then why do I feel like he's still right?" Rebecca asked. Her eyes were cast downward, looking at the floor between them.

Frank shrugged. "Guilt's a strange thing. All I know is that I've never seen my brother act such a gentleman before. Kind of impressed, honestly."

Rebecca let out a breath of air that sounded like a laugh. "That wasn't me. He always had that in him."

"But it came out because he wanted to change for something. I've gotta hand it to you, you've done him some good—regardless of how this ends up, I hope you know that."

"Thanks, Frank."

"Speaking of," Frank said, nodding his head toward his approaching brother. "I think he just saw Draco leave in a huff."

Rebecca scanned the area and saw the remainder of her friends looking toward the door, concern their major expressions. Clearly Draco had not left gracefully. She turned her attention back to Jamie.

"Everything all right over here?"

"It'll be better once this night's over," Rebecca said.

Jamie looked at Frank questioningly.

Frank shrugged. "The kid's got problems directing his anger at the right people."

Jamie nodded. "Becca, Harry's asking for you."

Rebecca closed her eyes for a moment before she squared her shoulders. "I'll be right back."

She made her way to Harry, who sat in the large armchair surrounded by his opened gifts. The scene was comical enough to make her want to laugh.

"Draco seemed upset when he left," Harry said as she took a seat on the stool beside him.

"Putting it lightly."

"You seem upset."

"Just something he said."

"Trying to make you feel guilty," said Harry.

"Yeah, but only after telling me he wants me to stand up next to him at his wedding. What a guy, huh?"

Harry shook his head. "Don't let him get to you. But I did originall call you over here so I could thank you for your gift."

He held up said item, a large scarf in red and gold with the lettering "Gryffindor" spelled out in fine black script. Harry looked at her. A sly grin spread over her face.

"I thought it was a really fine scarf until George pointed out that it looked different after a few minutes," Harry said.

"If you move it a certain way, it changes."

Harry smiled despite himself and shook his head. "Which is why George asked me why my scarf had Slytherin colours."

Rebecca giggled.

"I'm impressed with your charm work."

"Not entirely mine. Would you believe Flitwick likes playing pranks?"

Harry chuckled. "Somehow it doesn't surprise me. Thanks."

"You're welcome. I knew you'd be good natured about it."

"One of my best mates is a Slytherin. They're not so bad after all, I figure."

She smiled and looked down at her hands.

"Hey, we'll have our answer soon." He put his hand on her shoulder. "Hang in there."

She nodded, looking up at him, then put her hand over his and squeezed. Harry's name came from the mouths of several friends on the other side of the living room. They gestured for him to come over.

"I'll leave you to your adoring public," Rebecca said, leaning over and kissing his forehead.

"If you're gonna leave, at least say goodbye to me first."

"I'm a Slytherin, but I'm not Draco," she replied with a smirk.

Rebecca kept conversation with many of the different groups invited tonight. She lost track of the time, her nervousness abating long enough for her to lose more than an hour of time. When the clock struck eleven, she couldn't help but look at it until its chimes faded. She felt someone touch her hand gently.

She looked down to find Jamie once again beside her. Rebecca smiled and pulled him over to the side, sitting down on a stool. He maneuvered his chair so that he was directly in front of her and held her entire attention. She held his hand and found that she was shaking.

Jamie held her hand between both of his and placed it on his knee.

"Do you need to leave?"

"I don't think I could be alone right now."

"I'll wait with you."

She shook her head. "I'll stay until midnight. Then I should be fine to go."

"I'm sure–"

"Please, just don't." She closed her eyes and gripped his hand more tightly.

Jamie shut his mouth and looked down at their linked hands.

"Let's talk about something else," he said.

"Like what?" she asked, opening her eyes.

"Like the fact that Harry's wearing a Slytherin scarf and I have a feeling you're behind it."

Rebecca snorted. "That's me."

"I feel like the colours suit him."

"Molly's been insisting green is his colour forever because of his eyes. I always saw the irony."

"Well he obviously likes it or he wouldn't still be wearing it."

"He thinks it's funny."

"Well thank Merlin for that," Jamie said with a smile. "Though I don't think he'd be able to stay mad at you for long."

Rebecca shook her head.

"There. Feeling better?"

"For now."

"Come on. At times like these, a girl needs her girlfriends. Hermione and Ginny are just over there. Let's go talk to them, shall we?"

"Sure," she said with a tiny smile.

She let Jamie lead her over to the other girls across the room, meaning they had to pass through the front of the living room area. As Jamie rolled forward, he took the opportunity to take her hand once more and kiss the back of it swiftly, then place it on his shoulder. Rebecca felt overwhelmed by the sweet gesture and smiled down at him.

A heavy footfall just to her right caught her attention. She turned her head toward the entrance of Grimmauld Place to find Kreacher standing beside a man dressed in all black. His thick beard covered the majority of his face while he stared at those in the room through a heavy curtain of black hair. His black eyes found hers immediately.

"Professor Severus Snape," Kreacher said, his voice carrying through the room, bringing it to silence.

Rebecca felt her knees giving out beneath her as an anguished cry reached her ears. Her hand on Jamie's shoulder was the only thing keeping her upright. Everyone was still as Rebecca covered her mouth, realising that it was her who made the noise.

"Severus."

His name sounded shaky coming from her lips. He took a step forward.

"I nearly returned home only to remember the significance of the date."

His voice was still the same, and Rebecca felt her knees go weak once more. She saw his eyes travel down her shoulder, her arm, and to her hand, still resting on Jamie's shoulder.

"Perhaps I may be able to persuade you to come with me so we might speak privately," Severus said to her hand.

Rebecca drew her hand away and clasped it tightly in her other, wringing the appendage.

"You owe me an explanation," she said.

His eyes snapped back to hers.

"One that I will give to you if you would only come with me."

She grit her teeth together. "I thought you were dead!"

Her shout made him shut his eyes, but he did not otherwise move.

"This whole time, I thought the worst. But I thought you might send me something to tell me you were all right. Anything. Any day I thought I might receive something."

He took a step forward. "Rebecca—"

She stepped back, almost tripping over Jamie in the process, having forgotten he was there. He reached up and helped steady her with his hands about her waist. Severus' eyes narrowed.

"Don't touch her, Turner."

His tone was low, deadly. Jamie removed his hands and slowly moved away from Rebecca in the hopes of de-escalating the situation. Severus stepped forward suddenly and tried to reach for her hand, as if to snatch her away. Kreacher scrambled out of the way. Rebecca turned away.

"Stop it, Severus."

His fingers finally found her wrist, and they closed about and pulled her forward not ungently.

"I said no!"

Her hand made contact with the side of his face before she had thought about moving the limb. She breathed heavily as she glared at him. A beat after she slapped him, Severus released his hold on her wrist.

He gave her one last look. She saw the hurt there.

"I will wait until you are ready to speak about this matter after you've calmed yourself."

He turned on his heel, his cloak billowing behind him. The door slammed behind him, and the portrait of Mrs. Black began to scream. Rebecca held the wrist he'd grasped so tightly that it already showed signs of bruising.

"Well, great party, Harry," said George. "We'll just be getting on now."

There was a smacking sound from behind her, as if he'd patted Harry jovially on the shoulder. Rebecca heard George muttering, and soon he and Angelina were in her line of sight, quickly leaving through the same door through which Severus had exited.

"Becca..."

She shut her eyes as she felt Jamie's presence at her side. Another hand touched her shoulder.

"Are you all right?" Harry's voice said gently into her ear.

"Not now."

The two words spoke volumes to her friend, who dropped his hand from her shoulder. Rebecca took a deep breath in.

"I'm sorry for causing a scene."

"Don't worry about it," Harry said. "I'm more concerned about you."

"I have to go talk to him."

"Now? Rebecca, I don't know if it's safe," Jamie said.

She looked down and found that Jamie looked just as frazzled as she felt. More importantly, he looked frightened.

"I need my answers, and it can't wait."

His frown deepened and he put his face in his hands. Rebecca knelt beside him as the others looked on. She coaxed one hand away from his face and held it in both of her hands. For the moment she was able to push away the rest of her emotions—anger, pain, guilt—and simply look upon Jamie with all of her sorrow and feelings of shame.

"I'm sorry," she whispered.

"You never would have done anything if I hadn't started this. I only have myself to blame. Now go on."

He released her hand as quickly as his words poured out. Rebecca looked at Jamie, biting her lower lip.

"You know where to find me if you need to talk," he said, looking away from her.

"I'm sorry."

Jamie shook his head, unable to meet her gaze.

When Rebecca stood before him and looked around, the others in the room were turned away from them. She put a hand on Harry's shoulder, and he brought her into a crushing hug.

"If I don't hear from you by tomorrow by lunch, I'll be coming after you."

"He won't hurt me," she said, pulling away.

Harry looked dubiously at her wrist and frowned. "Noon, Becca."

"I understand."

She turned to see Frank standing off to the side. Rebecca glanced back over her shoulder at Jamie before she stared Frank in the eye.

"Please take care of him."

Frank nodded. "You let him know you're safe by noon tomorrow, too. That'll do him a world more of good than I can do him."

"I will."

Rebecca's feet carried her out the door before she could hesitate any longer. Her mind was so focused that she had no trouble Apparating, despite her still-shaking hands. The back garden was illuminated, showing all of the work she'd put in over the past month. She entered the back door quickly, scanning the kitchen and what she could see of the dining room.

He wasn't there.

The study was also empty. Rebecca could feel the panic welling up in her until she heard the faint sounds of the piano. She ran to the front of the house and found him sitting at the bench before the instrument, his fingers upon random keys and holding them down. Much like she had done when Draco first helped her move in.

She stood in the doorway to the living room. Her back faced the front door and the staircase that led upstairs. There weren't any other lights on except for the street light just outside the front window. Severus was cast in a dim yellow glow.

"Severus."

"Did you mean to put the piano here?" he asked, not looking up from his fingers on the keys. They had gone quiet some time ago.

"Yes."

"You looked at the pictures."

"I did."

She had seen the picture of his mother playing on the piano in the living room, exactly where hers now sat.

Severus lifted his fingers from the keys and placed his hand in his lap.

"How long have you lived here?"

"Since school let out."

"Visitors?"

"Just Draco. He helped me move in."

A long pause. Finally, he turned to face her. Once again, she was struck by the change in his appearance. The beard and out-of-control hair didn't help to settle her nerves.

"And Turner?"

She shook her head.

He raised a hand to the cheek she had slapped as he looked at her. His gaze felt as though it was devouring her, and she shivered.

"I should not have tried to drag you away," he said, letting his hand drop once more. "You are angry with me."

"I thought you were dead."

She kept her voice even when she said the words this time, and even sensed the last word cracking.

"I nearly was."

"Lucius?"

"At home."

"Thank Merlin."

She leaned against the wall, covering her face with her hands. Rebecca heard him moving and looked up. He stood beside the bench, but stopped when her eyes fell upon him.

"Where have you two been?"

"Lucius received a direct threat from the terrorist group affiliated with the group you and your Aurors took down in America. When he took the matter to Kingsley, the Minister revealed that there had been other threats made by the same group."

Rebecca shut her eyes. "Harry and the others?"

"And you and the Malfoys. Lupin. Minerva. Kingsley. Even myself."

"Christ." She shook her head and looked at him once more. "Why hadn't Kingsley done anything?"

"He lacked the manpower. Still does. Lucius wanted to get those who threatened us before they got him. He asked if I would accompany him."

Severus looked long at her. "When he showed me the picture they'd taken of you from the Prophet with the Dark Mark over your face, I couldn't refuse."

Rebecca swallowed. "What happened?"

"We took the ones we could into custody and quietly sent them back to Shacklebolt. The others we killed."

"How many?"

Severus lowered his head, so that he was looking at her from behind his hair. "All of them."

Rebecca sunk to the floor, her back against the door frame. Severus stepped quickly toward her and knelt in front of her. She held up her hand, and he stopped just shy of touching her. His hands were halfway to her. He clenched them into fists, then released them.

"I would have gone with you."

Severus shook his head. "I could not put you in that kind of danger."

"That wasn't your choice to make."

"In this case, it was. I will stand by that decision for the rest of my life."

Rebecca frowned and looked away. Severus could no longer take the silence.

"You must put me out of my misery and tell me if I've lost you forever."

Rebecca turned her head towards him.

"He kissed your hand. He touched you familiarly."

"We've spent time together recently. I've kissed him. What you saw was the extent of our relationship."

His jaw tightened as he looked away.

"Where does this leave us?"

"I think we've lost trust in one another, Severus."

His eyes closed and his jaw grew slack.

"How I have missed the sound of you calling my name."

He looked vulnerable in his position in front of her, kneeling with his arms resting on his knees, eyes closed. Rebecca reached forward and gently touched his cheek. He flinched, opening his eyes. She tried to pull away, but his hand covered hers and kept it on his cheek. Severus let out a breath as he turned her palm toward his lips. He pressed them gently against her palm and rested there. A shiver went up her arm.

"Would you allow me to repair our broken trust?"

His eyes peered at her through his hair, his lips brushing against her palm as he spoke gently, quietly.

"Only if you'll allow me to do the same."

"On one condition."

She opened her mouth to tell him that he could name anything and she would agree. Her anger and sadness fell away. The pain would still be there once their moments were done, but they could work through them, just as they always had.

He stood quickly, drawing her up with him. Severus stooped slightly so that when he embraced her, each of their heads rested on the other's shoulder. His hand held the back of her head as his nose buried in her hair. She grasped each of his shoulders and held him tightly to her.

They remained holding one another tightly for what felt an age. Severus took in a shaky breath, right next to her ear.

"My condition," he said quietly. He paused, and she felt the tension in his body. "If you are able... tell me."

Rebecca pushed against his shoulder so she could look at him properly. Carefully, she brushed the hair away from his face as his eyes searched hers. She rested her palm against his cheek.

"I love you. Always."

She felt him breathe a sigh of relief as he closed his eyes. His forehead rested against hers. She nuzzled his nose with hers, and his hand came up to cup her cheek.

"I do have to ask you something," she whispered.

"Anything."

"The beard isn't a permanent fixture, is it?"

His smile made her heart flutter. His chuckle started from deep within his chest, and she felt it rumble through her. He stood straight and looked down at her, smoothing her hair away from her face.

"If you wish, it will be gone tomorrow morning."

"I wish it," she replied with a smile. "But I have always been curious..."

She stood on her toes and closed the distance between them. Their lips met and she took in a quick breath through her nose, then settled in around him. Severus knelt quickly, wrapped his arms around her, and picked her up. Rebecca wrapped her arms around his shoulders. Neither broke the kiss for a moment.

His beard wasn't intrusive until they tried to deepen the kiss. When he opened his mouth further to grant her access, Rebecca felt it tickling the sides of her lips and underneath her nose. She had to pull away because she was giggling.

Severus rested his forehead against her cheek, smiling at the sound of her laughter. "Perhaps I will get rid of it tonight."

"I wouldn't complain."

He set her down and kissed her forehead. "We have much to talk about yet, it seems."

Severus reached for her hand and took it.

"We do. But I'm going to send my Patronus to a couple of people before we talk."

He raised an eyebrow.

"Harry told me he'd come here if I didn't send him a message by noon tomorrow. I'd rather send it to him now so he's not worried."

"He is overreacting," Severus said with a roll of his eyes.

Rebecca held up her wrist. "I'm sure you could understand why he might be, Severus."

He turned his attention to her wrist, already looking bruised in the dim lighting. Gently, he took it in both of his hands and pulled it to his lips. He kissed the injury and turned his eyes back to her.

"I am sorry," he said quietly. "I will not repeat the action. You have my word."

"Thank you."

She was perhaps a little breathless when she spoke. It was rare for an apology to come from his lips, but she thought that this detail might be different now. She cleared her throat.

"Go ahead and get started getting rid of that monstrosity," she said, waving him up the stairs. "I'll be up in a minute."

He hesitated, not wanting to let her from his sight for a moment. But she was not going to run or leave him. Severus nodded and went up the stairs. Rebecca cast her Patronus after he had gone and spoke to it.

"Harry and Jamie, I wanted to let you both know that I'm fine. We're working through some things. I'll see you both soon, I'm sure."

With a wave of guilt, she sent her wolf off to deliver her messages, then turned to the stairs. She took them one at a time, steadying herself for the difficult conversation they were about to have. While she knew that she loved Severus, she had to tell him all of what happened between her and Jamie.

When she entered the master bedroom, he was already in the en suite, looking in the mirror with his wand raised. With a flick of his wrist, the hair from his beard fell to the ground, leaving behind stubble. Rebecca took off her cloak, then her shoes, sitting on the bed once she was done. With a second flick of his wand, the hair now on the floor disappeared. He turned to her.

"Much better," she said.

"I will need a razor if I'm to get the rest with any success," he said, stepping out of the bathroom.

"We'll get you one tomorrow."

"It was necessary for my disguise."

"I'd hate to think what Lucius looked like."

"Handlebar mustache."

Rebecca held back her laughter, though barely. "You can't make me laugh when we're about to have a very serious conversation."

He sat down on the bed beside her heavily and turned to look at her. "You are about to tell me that you've developed strong emotions for Turner."

"Yes."

She held his gaze, though it was difficult.

"You are here, Rebecca. The fact that you came to me, even as angry as you were, and listened to me, speaks volumes to me."

"You're not jealous?"

"I am forever a jealous man, Rebecca, as I told you from the beginning." His brows furrowed, and he frowned. "The very fact that he touched you in my sight nearly had me hexing him or laying hands upon him, regardless that the fight would not have been evenly matched."

Rebecca dropped her eyes, unable to look at him while he was clearly angry. She heard him let out a quiet sigh.

"I wanted you to find happiness again, and I suspected where you might turn should I not send word to you," he said, voice low. "However, it was something I was willing to risk in order to keep you safe."

"What happened when you and Lucius were gone?"

"I promise you that I'll reveal everything," he said, taking up her hand. "But I am tired, and I would rather us change into comfortable attire and have you tell me what has happened to you in the last year."

She nodded.

"I think I can do that."

He ran his thumb across her knuckles, then stood. Severus approached the dresser and opened up the top right drawer, where the clothing he sought still sat. He smiled to himself before taking the items into the en suite with him. Rebecca found her own preferred sleeping clothes and changed into them in the closet, noting the boundary he had purposefully put between them. Changing separately indicated that he meant what he said, that he wanted to talk and not rush back into their relationship before trust had been fully restored.

When she came back into the bedroom, he was already settling into bed. He looked up at her and took her in. He seemed content just to look at her.

"Just let me brush my teeth and I'll be right back."

She quickly hid in the bathroom away from his eyes. Rebecca knew that she would tell him everything. She wouldn't be able to keep it all to herself. Another minute saw her nerves steeled, and she entered the bedroom once more.

His eyes were immediately upon her, his expression soft. Severus beckoned her forward, and she slipped easily under the covers. He sat up against the pillows and opened his arm to her so she might lean against him as she spoke. She opted for this, needing to feel him as much as he seemed to want to hold her.

And then she started from the beginning, when Draco woke her up the morning of August first. She told him about her ever-changing emotions during the first few months. She told him about her mother leaving her father. How she had practically stalked Kingsley for information on his whereabouts, and even spoke to him at George and Angelina's wedding. She told him about Jamie returning, about how crushed and relieved it hadn't been him. How their relationship began to change then when she didn't allow herself to see it.

She told the story from her birthday in full, not leaving out a moment. While his lips thinned, he didn't speak throughout her story. Even when she told him that she'd gone to forgive him after her parents' divorce was finalised, he still remained almost completely impassive. Her words came to her faster from the past couple of months, as her thoughts and emotions had been jumbled. She told him how she was convinced he was dead, but the small sliver of hope kept her feeling guilty. Until that night just last month, after celebrating Bill and Fleur's announcment of their second child.

Rebecca told him that in full, too, unable to look at him the entire time she spoke. She told him how kind Jamie had been since the incident from her birthday, how he hadn't pushed her once. All of the fault belonged to her, if he wished to lay blame anywhere.

When she was done, she let herself breathe and try to remain calm. Finally, she stole a glance his direction. He simply looked at her, his hand still resting on her shoulder.

"Aren't you going to say anything?"

"I believe you want me to be angry with you."

"I'd take anything at this point except silence." She bit her lower lip.

He raised his hand and, with his thumb, he gently pulled her lip from between her teeth. Then he let his thumb rest there while he looked over her face.

"You told the truth, which is all I can ask. I cannot claim that I'm not angry, because I am. But you followed what you felt was right in your heart and mind, and yet you still remained faithful to me even when you had no reason to be."

He shook his head and let his hand drop to the bed between them.

"Perhaps one day you will stop surprising me."

She smirked. She'd heard the line from his lips more than once.

"I doubt it."

"The more important thing, I believe, is how you are feeling," Severus said.

"Simultaneously wonderful and terrible."

"You feel guilt over Turner."

"A lot of guilt. As much as I felt over you."

"I cannot make promises that I will be able to help you with these feelings," he said. "I've tried not to be... domineering. But I am possessive. I know you will not betray me—you have shown that."

"But Jamie?"

"I will have no problem duelling him if it comes to it," he answered, looking her directly in the eye.

"I'll speak with him soon, make sure he understands everything."

Severus nodded, then glanced at the clock on his nightstand. He shook his head. "I cannot stay awake much longer."

"We can go to sleep."

Rebecca looked him over and couldn't remember a time he seemed more worn out, and not just physically. He moved his pillow so that it lay flat, then began to stretch out. Rebecca did the same with her pillow. She turned out the light.

The darkness surrounded them, and Rebecca lay still. She tried not to even think until she was certain Severus was asleep beside her. But he rolled over, closing the distance between them suddenly. His arm snaked around her waist, pulling her close. His mouth rested just beside her ear.

"Sleep, Rebecca," he said quietly.

"I'm not sure I can."

"I know you are worried. But you're tense, and I won't be able to sleep with you like that."

He moved so that his nose nuzzled her neck, and he breathed her in. She felt all the tension go out of his body. She reached down and took his hand in hers, bringing it up and kissing his palm the same way he had done to her earlier that evening.

She felt him smirk against her neck.

"I may be tired, but any more of that will see me quite awake," he muttered against her skin. "And I wanted to save that for when we were both more prepared."

Rebecca smiled, letting him settle his hand upon her waist against. She felt her body mold to his, fitting just as it once did. Finally, her mind felt at ease and allowed her to fall asleep.