Wow, this took a lot less time to write. Only a few days. XP

Anything you recognize is not mine.

Swearing and Slash is very obvious in this fic. If you are offended by it, then don't read.

Chapter 12: Your Call

Draco's PoV

Thoughts are crashing around in my head. I can't think, can't breathe, I can't even string a response together.

"Draco? Are you even listening to me?" his voice is sad and hurt. This is obviously hurting him as much as it hurts me.

"Uh-huh," is all I can manage to say.

I feel a burning in the back of my throat. The tears are about to pour from my eyes. He is standing in front of me with his arms crossed, "Harry, why are you shutting down on me? I know you aren't this cold."

"No, Draco, that's the problem. You don't know anything about me except what you have heard from other people. You don't know the first thing about me."

"Well then give me a chance to learn! Tell me what you want me to know. I'm willing to do anything, just stay with me," I'm practically down on my knees begging for him not to leave me.

"Stop it! You are making this harder than it needs to be, on both of us," he turns away and starts toward the door.

I won't let him see me this weak ever again. I put on the mask I wore around him all those long years before this, "Damn it, Potter. You are being so difficult about this! I don't understand why every single fucking time something goes wrong you bail! You just get up and leave everything. Why are you so scared? What happened in the past that made you afraid to just stay with something until the end? You – just – I – ugh – AH!" I scream in frustration and turn to the nearest wall. My knuckles collide with it and I hear the bones crack, but I don't feel the blood trickle down my hand or the pain I know should be coursing through my arm. The anger inside of me is so strong it numbs my entire body.

"I do not run away from everything when it gets hard. If anyone does it's you! All you do is run away. You ran away from your family because you couldn't stand disappointing your father! You ran away from the Death Eaters because you couldn't live up to their expectations! You tried to run away from life when you fucked up! Goddamn it you are such a fucking hypocrite!" his green eyes are blazing with anger and hurt. I hit him hard in the balls metaphorically, and it hurt badly.

"Don't you dare bring up my Father or the Death Eaters! Both were a mistake and you know it!" my voice is shaking and I can barely keep my temper in check.

"Why shouldn't I? It's not like it's not true."

That's it, he crossed the line.

"Fuckyou and your stupid feelings! I don't care anymore. If you want to leave, go right ahead, the door is right there. I'm not going to stop you."

On the outside I want him to leave and I never want to see his smug face again, but on the inside I am begging him not to go.

Please don't leave me. I need you. I can't do this without you. Don't step out that door, stay here with me. We can work things out, we just need time. Please, Harry, please.

"Fine. This is goodbye then." he jerks his head in my direction and steps out the portrait hole without another word.

No, no! Not again. This can't be happening. I will not break down again. Last weekend was the last time I will ever show weakness again.

"AHHHHH!" I shout with anger and kick the couch again and again; beating down on everything in my sight. Thank God the room is empty or else I would look like a mad man.

Stupid, stupid, stupid! How could I be so stupid! Goddamn it! Why me? Haven't I suffered enough?

For the umpteenth time in the past few days, my body shuts down and everything goes black.

Later:

"Draco? Draco are you okay?" Pansy is shaking my shoulders and taping my face lightly.

"Move, let me try."

I feel Blaise move over toward my body. I'm awake but I want to pretend to be passed out a little while longer.

"OI! Wake up!" his hand connects with my face with a smack sound echoing through the room.

"OW! What the hell Blaise?" I pop up from where I'm lying and glare at him.

"Sorry, we just wanted to make sure you were still alive."

"Yeah, I am," my gaze lowers. "Just barely."

"What do you mean, just barely?" Pansy wraps her arms around me.

"He's gone," my voice is audible, but only just.

"Aw, Drake, baby, who's gone?"

Even though she already knows the answer I tell her anyway.

"Harry," the pain is too much for me too handle and tears start to form.

"What the hell happened between you two? One second you guys are fine, and now all of a sudden you are suicidal and he's MIA." Blaise is fuming. I can tell he feels just as betrayed as I do.

"I – don't know. It's entirely my fault. If I hadn't been so fucking needy…."

"Draco, this isn't your fault at all. If Potter can't love you at your worst, what makes you think he deserves you at your best?"

That's my Pansy. She always knows what to say to make me feel better, at least for a little while.

Eventually they calm me down enough to coax me to the Great Hall for dinner.

"Draco? Are you going to be okay?" Pansy asks worriedly. She is such an amazing friend, always thinking about people she cares about first.

"Yeah, I'll be fine. Just need to find a seat not facing him."

"Are you sure 'cause I can go over there and make him leave."

Ha. Make him leave, that's a nice way of putting it. Put on a brave face, Draco, and act like nothing is wrong.

"No, it's fine. I have to get used to it sooner or later, and I'd rather it be sooner than later."

Everything will be fine. Just ignore him and everything will be fine.

How wrong could I be?

Sorry this is a little shorter than usual. Hopefully the next chapter will be up next week or so.

Please Read and Review!

Love,

-CM44-

okay, so i just have something really important to say. As of right now I am taking a break from this story. I have a bunch of chapters written out but I'm not happy with them. Honestly I'm not really happy without this story at all at the moment. I feel like I've grown as a writer and this story hasn't really shown it at all. I'm putting this on hold for the moment. Sorry for anyone who actually is still reading this. =( I will eventually finish this I promise you! Bu…I'm taking a hiatus from this. Also I will be posting updates on my latest projects on my tumblr.