All I want to do

January 13th 2022

7am- Making packed lunches for all 3 children has become military operation, have developed conveyor belt like assembly methods.

8am- "Teeth!"

"Wait!" Ellie is most stubborn, also, as speech skills have progressed, have discovered is nosiest and most opinionated. Tom emerges, but other two staying put. Will have to go downstairs and fetch them.

8:03am- "You two, bathroom, now!"

"WAIT UNTIL SCOOBY DOO'S FINISHED!"

What age do children realise that every Scooby Doo episode ends with the monsters/ghosts/aliens ending up being humans in elaborate costumes? Can't wait till day comes.

8:45am- Teacher could look like Brad Pitt and wouldn't envy, as probably have to look after little monsters like mine every day. Still need to decide what to do on day off. Should probably catch up on reports.

9:32am- Sneaky bitch managed to weasel herself a day off out of Leo. Will leave her to arrange plans for day.

10:03am- "Harry!"

"What?" Hope doesn't need help with new eBook reader again.

"How do I bookmark something?"

Kill me now.

10:32am- "Just pass me it!"

"No, I'll never learn if you just do it for me all the time!"

"My god, woman,"

"Don't call me 'woman'!"

Can't help laughing. Makes her even angrier.

"What's so funny!" Really should stop. "Harry, why are you laughing! HARRY?"

10:34am- Have recovered from laughing fit. Just.

10:35am- "Care to tell me what's so hilarious?"

"You can't work a piece of technology, which requires you to wear reading glasses when you use it and you're telling your husband off," Must hold back laughter. "Whilst wearing a snuggie,"

"So what?"

"How many more 'old woman' clichés do you want to include in your life, dear?"

"Harry!"

"I'm married to an OAP,"

"You're not so young yourself," She objected. "You're hair is less salt and pepper and more silver fox,"

"I'm a fox? Why, thank you," Cheeky wink.

"And," Ignored me. "You put your back out putting up Ellie's shelves," Ignored her.

"I think I'm pretty youthful,"

"There's a difference between youthful and just being plain immature,"

12:04pm- Fancy baked potato. Can't wait whole hour.

12:07pm- Plan. Thank god for microwaves.

12:38pm- Shit.

12:39pm- "HARRY, WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT NOISE!" Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit.

1:43pm- Finally finished clearing up exploded potato. Not quite relaxing day off work had planned.

1:53pm- "I'm married to a 3 year old. I thought part of the wedding vows was growing up together?"

"Growing old, not up. Old." Enjoy snuggling on sofa. "Nobody mentioned growing up,"

Is grow old with you.

There you go; the end.

This story is dedicated to Huw Thatcher. He never had the chance to grow old with anyone and there's an empty seat next to me in history that I wish he could fill again.
25th November 1995 – 13th March 2011