Disclaimer: I used to own supernatural, the boys, the Impala and everything else on the show. But then, the men in white gave me my meds and I had to take them.

Summary: They had to find a cure, they just had to. Sam couldn't lose Dean. Not after everything.

A/N: Here's the next chapter.

"You are enjoying this, aren't you?" Dean said snidely. "You just love beating your brother up, show me how much stronger you are. Like the time you picked Ruby over me."

"Yeah, I would just love to hit you right now." Sam replied tightly.

With Bobby headed towards the Campbell compound, the job of taking care of Dean fell to Sam. As much as he hated seeing his brother like this, Sam just couldn't let him starve and besides, he had to almost constantly change Dean's blood IV's to keep him on his own demon-tainted blood.

Bound up as Dean was, his words were the only weapons available to him and he used them to devastating effect. Even at his angriest at Sam, Dean had always held back, but now he was proving that if he knew exactly what to say to push his buttons, to make it hurt worse than any demon could. The fact that he seemed rational enough to accept food from Sam made it so much worse.

"You really think you are gonna end up being a hero on this one?" Dean asked. "That you magically save your big brother from some virus and everything you have done, it'll be just wiped clean?"

Sam didn't reply.

"Or maybe you think that you are already forgiven?" Dean continued. "Which is it, Sam? You really think that I don't have a right to be mad at you, to want to chop you up in little pieces, after everything you did to me?"

So this is what Dean could become, if he turned into a demon, Sam thought. He sincerely hoped that they would up in heaven, because world wouldn't be able to take a demon-Dean.

"Time to change your IV." Sam said, putting down the mashed potatoes, and taking out a blood bag to change the empty one. "Try to stay still."

"Oh, I see. So your plan is to turn me into a freak like you." Dean taunted. "Infect me with demon blood. Turn me into a monster like you. Why Sam? So I'd get where you were coming from?"

"You already are a monster." Sam said, and immediately regretted the words.

"Is that right?" Dean smirked. "So why don't you just kill me already? C'mon, it won't be something you have never done before. Instead of taking the coward's way out and leaving me to die, just do it yourself this time. Or won't you be able to live with the fact that you failed me once again."

Sam closed his eyes and told himself that it wasn't Dean. It wasn't, no matter how much he looked and sounded like him, how much his words made sense. Dean would never hurt his little brother like this. Bobby, you better come back fast.

The Campbell's were a suspicious bunch, Bobby thought as his car rolled into the compound. Still, they could have let a person in before doing the salt-water-silver test at the gate. Walking into the base, Bobby ignored the looks of hostility and took his seat as if he belonged there. Apparently, Grandpa was out on a hunt, Bobby thought, as Christian limped into the room. It was unfortunate. Of all the Campbells, Christian was the one least likely to help them.

"Having a good day, Sunshine?" Bobby greeted.

Christian might have scowled in response, Bobby couldn't tell. Dean's handiwork on him while looking for Sam had left some permanent reminders.

"So what brings you here to our neck of the woods?" Christian asked, inspite of the fact that Bobby had told him over the phone.

"Heard you might have an antidote for the Croatoan virus." Bobby answered. "I need it to help a friend."

"Which friend? The Winchesters? Its gotta be them. Nothing else would get you to humiliate yourself like this." Christian's smirk looked more like a grimace. "Sam's immune, so it's gotta be Dean. It is, isn't it?" He laughed. "Well, isn't that just perfect? Dean Winchester, the high and mighty hunter, taken down by the lowly Croatoan virus."

"He took care of you, didn't he?" Bobby couldn't resist. "Look, you gonna help or not?"

"Even if we had the antidote, why would I want to help Dean?" Christian asked. "Because he is a fellow hunter? In case you didn't notice, I can't be a hunter anymore because of him."

"This has nothing to do with that." Bobby said. "You brought that upon yourself when you took Sam. For once, do the right thing."

"And helping Dean is the right thing? We got a limited number of shots of this thing, since Sam escaped and Dean killed the guy who made the stuff. I think it would be better if we save them. You know, in case one of us ever needs it."

"You have any idea who you are messing with here, kid?" Bobby asked angrily.

"Yeah, I know." Christian answered. "Bobby Singer, once a great hunter, now reduced to being the Winchester's butler."

"Oh, I'm so much worse than that, that I hope you never have to find out." Bobby replied. "But I'm not the one you should be worried about. Dean Winchester is the man who could move entire heaven by snapping his fingers. You think they are going to be happy when he makes it up there? You really think they are going to be happy, finding out you had a chance to help him and you didn't? And then there is Sam. You really wanna piss off a guy who took down Lucifer? Go ahead, call your Grandpa. Call any hunter you know. Ask them what happens when you mess with the Winchesters."

Christian got up coldly and limped out of the room. Bobby didn't know if he called Samuel to get permission, but five minutes later he came back in with a vial of red liquid in his hands.

"Here you go." He said, putting it on the table. "We actually don't know if this thing works. It has never been tested before. So don't come after us if this fails."

Bobby held out his hand to take it, but Christian made no move to hand it over.

"I want you to know that this means we are square." Christian said. "I don't care if this actually fixes Dean o not. We are doing a big thing by just giving this to you. We do this and the plate is wiped clean. We are even."

"I'll tell you when we are even." Bobby said calmly.

They locked eyes for a moment, engaged in a silent battle of wills. Then quietly Christian handed over the antidote.

"You think it's working?" Sam said, peering through the slot in the door into the panic room. "Does he look better to you?"

"You are the one looking at him." Bobby replied. "How does he look?"

"Well, he has got a fever." Sam answered. "He is pale and sweating. But that just might be my blood."

"Your demon blood is making him sick?"

"No. Dean and I are not blood compatible." Sam explained. "I'm type A. When another blood type is introduced in the system, the body attacks it. He might be sick for quite a few days."

"What type is Dean?"

"O." Sam answered.

"Figures." Bobby smirked. "Universal donor."

Sam smiled at the unusual compliment to his brother.

"I'm gonna kill you all." Dean shouted from inside. "I know you are out there Sam. You let me out of here, you let me live and I'll kill you and everyone you love."

Bobby's heart sank. Ofcourse it wouldn't be this easy, it never was.

"Sam, Christian said it might take some time." Bobby sought to comfort Sam as much as himself.

"No, Bobby, I think that's Dean in there." Sam said quietly.

"Really?" Bobby asked, confused. "Which part of your brother you see threatening to kill you?"

"The really messed up part." Sam answered. "You know Dean. You know that he would never want to risk hurting us. He still isn't sure that the thing is out of his system. So he's trying to get us to kill him. That sound like Dean to you?"

"Kinda." Bobby was still not convinced.

"Think about it. If it was still the virus, He would be saying that he was cured, just to get out."

"I guess." That made sense, Bobby thought. "But you can't just let him out on that."

"I know. I have an idea."

"You want me to what?" Lisa asked. "I'm not going into the same room as that thing."

"Look, Lisa, this is the only way to make sure." Sam explained. "If it is Dean in there, he would threaten to kill you, threaten anything to convince you to kill him. But if it's the virus, He would try to convince you that he was cured. Either that or he would try to hurt you with words."

"Well, what if that thing has also figured this out? What if it's trying to use this reverse psychology to convince you that it's Dean?"

"That's why we want you to go in there." Sam answered. "Look, even if Dean is trying to scare you, he'll never say anything to really hurt you. Dean will know when to pull his punches. That thing will have no such limits."

It didn't take much further argument to convince Lisa. She loved his brother, Sam knew that, and she understood Dean like no other woman had. Sam also knew that Lisa would anything to get his brother back, they all would.

Dean was definitely sick, Lisa thought as she entered the panic room. He was feverish, restless, pale and almost out of it. Almost, since he saw him stiffen up as she entered the room. She had seen that look on Dean's face before. It wasn't the first time Dean had tried to push her away to protect her from himself. Every time he tried to appear like a callous jerk, trying to convince her that she would be better off without him, but she had always seen through it and it had always made her love him even more.

"I'm gonna enjoy killing you, you know." Dean said grimly, and it was clear that he took no pleasure in those words. "If you let me live, you and Ben won't live long enough to regret it. Neither will rest of your family. I'll hunt them down one by one and kill them all."

Apparently Dean was a bad actor when he was sick, Lisa realized. She could see the despair in his eyes, begging her to believe him and go away. Resolutely, she made her way to his bed and caressed the side of his face.

"You sure you don't want to have some fun with me before you do that?" She asked.

A brief look of surprise flashed through Dean's face before he covered it up. There was no answering leer, no sadistic pleasure in his face. This was Dean, her Dean, who was once again trying to push her away.

"You are only any good to me as a corpse." Dean replied, but couldn't meet Lisa's eyes this time.

A resounding slap echoed through the room. Dean looked up shocked as Lisa stood up and turned towards the door.

"You can set him free." She called to someone beyond the door. "I think he's fine now."

"What -?" Dean started asking, confused, as Sam entered with a big grin on his face.

"You really had us going there for a moment." Sam said, loosening Dean's bonds. "It's okay Dean, you are fine now."

"Sam – no -" Dean weakly tried to resist Sam's attempts to take out the IV needle from his arm.

"Has he been cured? I came as soon as I could." A voice said from the door, making both Lisa and Sam jump. Lisa turned around, defensively putting herself between Dean and the stranger taking out the knife she had brought to the room.

"Lisa, it's okay." Sam assured. "It's Castiel."

"The angel?"

"Yeah." Sam turned towards the heavenly being. "Cas, where the hell have you been? I've been calling you non-stop. I even tried using Dean's ring. He needed you here."

"The ring could only be used by its owner." Castiel explained. "I sincerely apologize. I could not hear your prayers, I had gone to another time to look for – well, it doesn't matter. Believe me, I came as soon as I heard."

"Well, your sigil was useless." Sam said. "What the hell, Cas? I thought it was specifically designed for this sort of thing."

"The sigil has to be modified for individual creatures." Cas answered. "I never came up with the modification to counter the Croatoan virus. There was never any need. It's fortunate that you didn't need me after all. Dean seems to be fine."

Sam and Lisa turned back towards Dean, who had finally lost the struggle with the fever and slipped into unconsciousness. His brow was hot, too hot, Sam realized as he felt it. The blood transfusion between them had always left Dean weak and sick for days.

"Is he really fine?" Sam asked Castiel. "You sure he is cured right?"

"Yes." Castiel replied. "As an angel I can see the demonic taint in a person. Dean is free from the virus, I can assure you."

"Okay, so fix him then. Make him all better."

"I do not believe that to be a good idea." Castiel said. "I think it would be best if we allow your blood to assimilate with his. He will not develop any traits like you, it's too late in his life, but hopefully he would acquire the same immunity."

Sam sighed. Castiel was right. But that meant they had to deal with a sick Dean for the next few days. Especially a sick and guilty Dean. This was definitely not going to be easy.

Haze. A smoky, numbing cocoon of haze surrounded him for he didn't know how long. It had to be the drugs, the antibiotics and the painkillers that kept him from feeling the pain and the fever. And he didn't deserve it. Even though he couldn't remember why, Dean knew he didn't deserve to feel this comfortable. That was why he rejoiced in the intermittent moments of clarity. The moments when he woke up shivering violently under layers of blankets. The moments when his stomach revolted and he threw up in a conveniently placed bucket next to the bed. The moments when he was conscious and felt as if every nerve in his body was on fire. That was what he deserved to feel, not this comfortable fog that made him feel like he was floating in clouds.

Dean tried to remember what had happened, what had led him to end up sick in a bed. He was obviously being taken care of. Through the fog he sometimes felt gentle, soothing hands wiping his brow. Sometimes there would be a huge body next to him, washing him and changing him. Sometimes a much smaller one, that of a boy, wrapped around him keeping him comfortable. Sometimes, a gruff voice told him to take his medicine, which he did unthinkingly. And always there would be some comfortable presence around him, like a fire burning at a distance that kept him warm in the fog.

He should have stayed in the fog, Dean thought when he finally regained consciousness. He would have given anything not to remember the reasons why he felt he didn't deserve the comfort. He had become a monster. He had hurt the people closest to him and he would give anything to take back the things he had said, but he couldn't. He wasn't ready to face the consequences, the guilt and he wanted to go back to the comfortable haze once more.

Dean looked around as he painfully got up from the bed. He was alone, as expected. No comforting presence on the chair next to him. No brother or wife or son or father anywhere to be seen. Well, he couldn't really expect them to stick around after everything. His mind had probably made everything up in an attempt to shield him from reality. Probably there had never been a comforting presence in the room.

Well, he had had a good run. He had known happiness for a while and he had now lost it through his own fault. He always did this, did something to screw everything up. He had known it wouldn't last forever, but he had never expected it all to end like this. Lisa and Ben were probably long gone by now, never wanting to see him again. He'd probably find divorce papers in the next mailbox he checked. He couldn't expect them to forgive him after the things he had said. And Sam, well, his debt was repaid. He had saved Dean from himself, and now was probably off on a hunt. Maybe with the Campbells, who had helped him save Dean. Bobby would be still here and probably was just waiting for Dean to be well enough to get the hell out of his house. He could picture himself making his way back downstairs and Bobby coldly asking him to leave and never call him again. Cas, well, he knew of the angel's distaste for anything demonic and Dean had the taint now. It was all over, Dean thought as he painfully made his way down the stairs. He'd had everything for a while and it was his fate to lose it all once again. Only this time he couldn't blame heaven or hell or Sam for it. It had all been his own doing.

"So, you are like Dean's guardian angel?" Dean heard Ben's voice in the kitchen, full of wonder.

"No. Guardian angels are a myth created by humans to feel that a higher power is looking out for them." He heard Castiel reply in his usual emotionless voice. "In reality, heaven couldn't care less about an individual's destiny."

Dean could picture Ben's face falling at that. By the sounds of laughing that followed, Bobby and Lisa were in the kitchen as well. What the hell were they still doing here?

"There you are." Sam's voice said from behind him. He turned around to see his brother holding a box and tossing the keys of the Impala onto the counter. "About time you woke up. Your fever broke last night. C'mon," Sam said as he ushered Dean into the kitchen. "Got you some pie."

This was not the reaction he had been expecting, Dean though as he was every face in the room light up at his arrival. Lisa took herself away from the stove long enough to give him a quick peck on the cheek and Ben hugged him tightly saying "Glad to see you are okay.". Through it all, Sam had his arm around his shoulder, as if to support him should his knees suddenly give out.

"I'm pleased to see you are feeling better, Dean." Castiel said from his chair.

"Cas here got his ass down from heaven long enough to join us for lunch." Bobby said gruffly. "Mr. high and mighty is usually too uppity to eat with us mortals."

"Lunch?" Dean said, confused. "What's going on?"

"Well, Bobby's made chilly." Lisa explained. "And now I'm fixing it. The thing he made would give an angel indigestion."

"I do not believe so. Angels do not suffer from the maladies that plague humans." Castiel stated in his matter-of-fact voice.

"Glad to see your sense of humor is as good as ever." Sam said, putting the pie in the fridge.

"What the hell is the matter with you people?" Dean shouted suddenly. "What's wrong with you? You all are just gonna pretend that the last few days didn't happen?"

"Dean, you are acting nuts." Sam said.

"No, you all are." Dean replied. "You can't just ignore everything that's happened."

Dean looked around at the shocked faces in the kitchen and walked out of the room before anyone could stop him.

"You should have killed me."

Dean was sitting dejected on one of the many rusting cars in the salvage yard when Sam found him. He should have expected this, he thought. They had all decided that acting normally was the best way to show Dean that nothing had changed, but clearly Dean's own guilt wouldn't let him believe that.

"You should have shot me as soon as I got infected." Dean repeated. "You did a massively stupid thing by bringing me here, Sam."

"I was trying to save your life." Sam replied.

"But you had no way of knowing that you could." Dean countered. "This could have ended so much more badly. I could have killed you or Lisa or Ben or Bobby. It was a dumb risk. And the things I said. How could they ever look at me the same again? How could you?"

"It wasn't you Dean, we all know that."

"Really? Because I don't." Dean replied. "It sure as hell felt like me. I didn't feel like I was possessed. My mind wasn't screaming for me to stop talking. I really wanted to hurt you all Sam and I meant every word I said."

"Yeah? Then say those things to me now." Sam said. "If you meant them, really believed them, you should have no problem repeating them. C'mon Dean, tell me how evil I am. Tell me how you want to kill me because you hate me, because I deserve it fro hurting you over and over again."

"Sam, c'mon-" Dean started.

"No, Dean." Sam interrupted him. "You need to realize that you are the most important thing in my life. You are the one who keeps me grounded, who keeps me on the straight and narrow. I need you for my own survival. And I'm not the only one. You are probably the best thing that's happened for each and every one of us inside. You are the only one who keeps this family together."

"What family?"

"The one in the kitchen." Sam said. "The one that's waiting for you to get you head out of your ass and have lunch with them. All of us Dean, we wouldn't be here without you. Ben and Lisa wouldn't be a part of my life without you. I'd have no reason to see them. Lisa couldn't ask for a better husband to keep her safe and Ben couldn't ask for a better role model. And I hardly ever talked to Bobby when you weren't there. I only called him for his help and that too rarely. And Cas, he doesn't come to earth unless you call for him. You are the one keeping this family together Dean and none of us want to lose you, for our own sake."

"It still doesn't change what I did." Dean said, looking at his feet. "It doesn't change what I said."

"Look, Dean, you had a good reason to say those things to me." Sam said. "God knows that I've hurt you in unimaginable ways. Trust me, I wake up every morning thankful that you can still look at me."

"Sam, please-"

"Dean, I can understand where you were coming from." Sam continued. "I'm trying to tell you that you are justified in hating me."

"I don't hate you Sam, you know that." Dean said. "That wasn't me saying those things."

"Oh, so you realize that, do you?" Sam's tone shifted. "You can't have it both ways Dean. You can't say it wasn't you for some things and it was for the rest. You can stop with the self-pity. Yes, a crappy thing happened to you and yes, as a result you are going to feel guilty for some things for the rest of your life, even if they were not your fault. But I'm not letting you push us all away for something you think was your fault."

"You really think they can- they can forgive me for everything?" Dean asked, cautiously hopeful.

"There is nothing to forgive Dean." Sam replied. "But if it makes you feel better, we all have already forgiven you. Look, Cas will be gone soon on his heaven business. Lisa and Ben are gonna continue their road-trip tomorrow and I found a hunt. So just spend this one day enjoying with your family. We all deserve it."

Dean nodded and they quietly made their way back into the house. They made it, Sam thought, it had been a close call and they had made it. They had gotten Dean back and there was no way they were letting him go again.

Alright, this part of the story is over. Next part would be completely independent. Tell me what you think.