Disclaimer; I don't own Pokémon or Wayne Brady.

It was a lovely day in Unimportant Town, USA, and a bunch of people were standing in a backyard talking about stuff, like rocket ships. And pancakes.

"Wait," said Zulu, who owned the backyard. "How did you guys find my house?"

"We came in through the back door," responded Nightmare.

Then, for no apparent reason, Zulu shrunk and grew black fur and coney ears. He had become an extremely small and fluffy Umbreon.

"Hey, wait!" shouted Were. "Coney isn't a word, author-person!"

Unfortunately, anything else he was going to say was blocked out by the collapsing of the fourth wall on top of his head. He died instantly.

However, in the non-Were-dying world, Zulu was busy trying to figure out why he was an Umbreon and why he was also fluffier than lint-which has a fluffiness ratio of 700 to 1. He was being cradled by Gwen, who then turned into a giant Salamence, leaving him in her jaws. He was promptly spit out.

"He tastes like fur…and fur," said Gwen.

"She tastes like…not fur."

KK, who had arrived all of seven seconds ago, transformed into a Shiftry. "Moo."

Were, from under the pile of Fourth Wall, shouted, "Shiftry don't moo! What are you getting at, auth-" He was cut off by a flying Octillery wrapping itself around his head. He died instantly. Again.

Suddenly Nightmare transformed into a Ralts. Somehow, the Ralts was still bigger than Zulu.

"Not cool."

Then Chill appeared out of essentially nowhere and transformed into…Chill.

Zulu exploded…literally. But then he reformed, and Were exploded and reformed…into a muffin.

"Mmm, this muffin is delicious," said Chill, bending down and picking up Were and taking a bite out of him.

"What did you do that for?" shouted Nightmare. "That muffin was on the ground, it's really dirty!"

"Moo," added KK.

"Good point," said Chill. He then threw the muffin into a wood chipper. Were died yet again.

Ten minutes later, the pandemonium had increased. The revived zombie corpse of Were was being forced into playing Patty-cake (a.k.a moo moo moo) with KK and Gwen.

"How are we doing this, author?" asked Were. "Gwen and KK don't have hands." He dodged a falling brick from the Third Wall, who was attempting revenge on Were for the murder of his bro. Were began to laugh, but then he was tackled by a rabid monkey, who then proceeded to fly away to Mars. Since he couldn't breathe, he died, as did Were. Seriously, again.

At the same time, Chill was playing fetch with Zulu.

"Fetch, boy!" he told his Koffing, who ran over and fetched Zulu in his jaws.

"I will eat your babies."

Suddenly, a loud noise came from the forest.

Zulu sniffed the air. "Oh, sh*t, it's Wayne Brady!"

A skinny black man barreled out of the forest with a giant machete-and a sword too. "I shall kill you all!"

"No you won't!" shouted the forgotten Nightmare. "Random-fact-jutsu-ose!" A giant tendril of words came out of her horn and tied up Wayne Brady onto a rock that appeared out of nowhere.

Were didn't even start his sentence before he was crushed by a giant rock. "I am rock," said the rock.

"I am dead," said the dead guy.

Wayne Brady was now forced to play Moo-moo-moo with KK and Gwen, as Were was dead and being used as a stick for Koffing.

"Let's go to McDonalds!" shouted Zulu.

TO BE CONTINUED.

A/N: …I'm going to be hated for writing this.

Willfully co-starring are NightmareSyndrom, Korona Karyuudo, Gwenevieve Skyes, and WereDragon EX. And Formerly Chilltown.