"This is getting old, Kyle, you and these damn dreams of mine."

These days every time I shut my eyes it's his face I'm waiting to see, and when I wake I see it again in John (and in that brave soul of his), but it hurts when I startle awake and know I can't see him again until the next night.

(and even then sometimes he is replaced by those goddamn machines as they kill us off one by one)

"Well too bad, Sarah, I'll be here until this war is won, at least I can be here, helping you in some way rather than doing nothing at all."

And if I'm lucky his hands and lips fall upon me, bring up that one night of bliss I was granted with him (before he was taken from me), but in the end it is always swept away and replaced with red eyes.

(those dreams that never give me a fighting chance just let me watch as John dies)

"Sometimes I just want to give up, Kyle, and join you."

Those hands forever worn and it was not long before my smooth ones joined him, pulled me up like so many times before.

"On your feet, soldier, this is a fight you can never give up on, Sarah, do it for me, and do it for our son."

Then the morning light comes burning in and takes him away for the day, the day that will be filled with fighting for our lives and the lives of millions, and when the darkness comes so does he.