Cleaning Up The Fandom- 39 Clues Awards

Chapter 1

"Oh dear," Nataliya furrowed her brow. "Well, this isn't very good." She was in a clean white room, sitting in front of a large computer. With a delicate hand, she scrolled through pages of stories.

"That goes without saying," Ian snorted. "Half of the archive is absolutely atrocious." He, too, was in front of a large computer screen. He wished he wasn't, though. It was getting rather depressing, this story reading.

"Yeah, yeah, enough with the fancy words," Dan rolled his eyes. "The writing is just fine in most of these- the problem is that there aren't enough ninjas. And they need more action. I mean, really, most of these stories are just crap about Ian and Amy!"

Madeleine nodded in agreement. "I cannot believe how unoriginal these people are, as well. Most of the stories have plots that are exactly the same!"

"Most of them don't have plots," Ian pointed out.

"There are a few good stories," Isabel noted while scanning a computer screen at the same time. "Look at this one- this one's rather different."

Ian went to see what his mother was looking at. "Yes, that one is better," he said shortly. He was sick and tired of looking at stupid stories that revolved around his relationship with Amy- honestly, it had just been one silly kiss. Perhaps they did have some feelings for each other, but it wasn't anyone else's business, at any rate. No one should be writing these horrid stories about it. A few times, he had come across a good one, but most of them were no different from the rest- either average or awful.

Dan sighed. There weren't any good stories! Why didn't anyone care about his role in the clues. Really, was Amy that much more interesting than him? He, for one, found Amy very boring. Why would anyone want to read about someone who just sat around in a dreary old library all day reading boring books? And there weren't even any funny stories- that was depressing. If it was not about ninjas, it was not full of action, and it was not funny, how could it be considered good? Dan couldn't think of anything. "I hate FanFiction," he griped.

"Now, Dan," Nataliya tutted. "It's not all bad. It wouldn't be bad at all if it weren't for all these silly stories people were writing."

"Exactly," Madeleine agreed. She rather liked Nataliya. She seemed quite sensible.

"Here's one Dan might like," Ian grinned. Dan ran over immediately. The story that Ian had pulled up was about a romance- and it wasn't Ian/Amy.

Dan looked into Natalie's gorgeous amber eyes, and the second he did, something clicked. He just knew that she was the only girl he would ever love. He leaned in slowly, and so did she, and their lips-

"OH SNAP!" Dan screeched. "EW EW EW EW!" He began running around and pulling at his hair.

"Ian, what did you do?" Madeleine asked sternly. She wasn't too fond of this one- he had betrayed her family. "What is the story about?"

"It's a story about the love between Dan and Natalie," Ian smirked. Nataliya groaned.

"Why must you torture him?" she asked in exasperation.

"Oh please, Nataliya, it is good that he is doing these things. It shows that he is strong." Isabel said, waving her hand.

"Cruelty should not be confused with strength," Nataliya muttered.

Isabel turned to Dan. "Really, my darling sweetheart, is this necessary? You should be grateful that these writers think that you are good enough for my daughter. Which, of course," she said. "Is dreadfully wrong. But anyway, you shouldn't be the one that gets angry over this."

"Oh really?" Dan yelled. "I don't want to spend a second standing near that chick, much less have a- ew- relationship with her! Why are these writers- so- just- ew!"

Isabel's eyes flashed at his comments. After all, Natalie was her daughter, and in Isabel's eyes the girl was nearly perfect. Sure, Ian was getting stronger, but she felt that he was still a bit sensitive to be the head Lucian. But despite the anger that was bubbling up in her mind, she said nothing.

"I am never going to read another of these fics again," Dan grumbled.

"Dan, you really will like this one," Nataliya called. At this point he was torn- he was pretty sure that Nataliya wasn't one to mess with him, and probably too smart to trick him after he had just been tricked, but at the same time he didn't want to have to look at a story like that one again. He decided to trust Nataliya, though, and so he went to see what she was reading.

"Your powers are weak," the ninja said.

Dan's mouth twisted up into a smirk. "We'll see about that. Hoi YA!" He wielded his samurai sword and fought like he'd never fought before. The sword gleamed in the sunlight as he slashed, and his enemies fell one by one.

"Man, this fic is awesome!" He shouted as he read. "Oh, this rocks!"

"What is that one about?" Madeleine asked absently.

"It's about me getting ninja skills and beating up a ton of bad guys! Oh yeah! And I get a samurai sword!"

"See? Not all the stories are so horrible," Nataliya said.

"Well, they should do something so that there aren't so many bad ones anymore," Dan nodded.

"Correction: we should do something so that they aren't all bad," Madeleine noted. "If you have an idea, do not wait for someone else to find it. Take matters into your own hands, and shape the idea into something great."

"That is an excellent idea. Let's start a foundation- one that promotes the idea of better fics." Isabel said.

"We should call it the Ninja Appreciation Society!" Dan cried happily.

"No." Ian said flatly. "Just no."

"We should take the name of a character that is seen a lot in the book series, but is often forgotten in the fanfictions." Nataliya suggested.

"Jonah Wizard? Hamilton Holt? Reagan Holt?" Madeleine threw out some ideas.

"Saladin! He rocks! But he isn't a human... how about Nellie!" Dan supplied.

"What? I thought her name was Nan?" Ian asked in bewilderment.

"Her name is Nellie Gomez," Dan said. "And she is awesome."

"Hardly," Ian frowned. "How about the Ian Kabra Society?"

"Hey! No one ever forgets you! Honestly, it's all Ian Kabra, all the time around here. The writers even seem to think that you're nice!" Dan scoffed.

"I am nice, thank you," Ian said huffily. Then he smirked. "Why do you think your sister was so taken with me?"

"EW! Don't even go there," Dan warned. "I'll-"

"My darling sweethearts, you must stop your fight," Isabel tutted sweetly. She pulled out a knife and began to polish it. "Or I'll stop it for you."

Dan shifted uncomfortably. "Um... please don't..."

"Anyway, I still think it should be the Ian Kabra Society," Ian sniffed.

"Actually, I rather liked the name 'The Nellie Gomez Society'," Madeleine said.

"Hmm... It's good... but it needs something..." Nataliya said thoughtfully.

"How about the Nellie Gomez Foundation?" Isabel suggested, examining her immaculate nails.

"I like it!" Madeleine smiled.

"It is good," Nataliya nodded. "We can call it the NGF for short."

"Great." Dan said happily.

"Fine," Ian consented reluctantly.

"So what should be our first act of awesomeness?" Dan asked.

"Well, we can't do anything to change the bad stories at this point," Madeleine said. "But we can do something to reward the good authors."

"Yes! We can have awards." Isabel said, getting interested in the idea. "The good authors will be rewarded with the finest- jewelry, gold, expensive automobiles. And the bad authors will be executed!" She smiled happily.

"Well, Isabel," Nataliya said uncertainly. "That sounds rather... illegal..."

"The reward part is probably out of the budget," Madeleine pointed out.

"Fine." Isabel scowled. "But we have to reward them with something!"

"Bragging rights?" Nataliya suggested.

"The winners get to kill the bad authors!" Ian grinned.

"No! No bad authors, and no death!" Madeleine said in frustration.

"Ninja powers!" Dan supplied.

"Yes. We will give ninja powers to the winners." Isabel said dryly.

"Well, it's all we have for now," Nataliya replied.

"Okay. So bragging rights and... ninja powers..." Madeleine finished uncertainly.

"You people are all insane," Ian shook his head and returned to the computer.

"At least we aren't evil backstabbers who-" Dan was cut off by a look shot from the eyes of Isabel.

"Okay. So we'll write a story that will ask readers to nominate and vote for their favorite stories, and award the winners?" Isabel summarized.

"Exactly," Nataliya nodded.

This is that story. Recorded by Isabel, Madeleine, Nataliya, Ian, and Dan, (The NGF) this fic is dedicated to the 39 Clues Archive's good authors. There are plenty of them here, it's just that a lot of them are hiding behind cliches and the fact that, well, a lot of us here just don't know what a good fic is. Hopefully the NGF will help take the archive to a new level of greatness.

The reader's assignment is to nominate stories through PMs or reviews to the NGF, and to vote on polls that will be posted on the admins' profiles.

Here are your catagories:
Best adventure
Best humor
Best parody
Best Amy/Ian
Best Dan/Nat
Best mystery
Best author
Best newbie
Best story
Best oneshot.

You are the reader. Your assignment begins now.