A/N: This is just a silly little ficlet. I'm still working on the sequel and the one-shots, but with the excitement about the BluRay release and big goings-on in my other obsession, I haven't really been able to just sit and write. Anyway, hope this gives you a laugh.

It's set just a month or two after the movie.

"No way, man!"

"She did that?"

"Why?"

Four Viking teens were standing outside the old dragon training arena, having just completed the mornings' feeding of the village's reptile residents. Snotlout, Tuffnut, and Fishlegs all crowded around Hiccup and gaped as the smaller boy showed them his latest injury: a vivid bruise around his left eye. Blues, purples, and yellows radiated out around the side of his face like a sick kaleidoscope. All three boys' faces were contorted in sympathy and awe.

Hiccup just shrugged weakly. "I didn't mention that I noticed the new skull on her skirt." He placed a freshly caught fish back against his face to cool the heated and swollen skin.

"Harsh!" Tuffnut gasped.

"Dude," Snotlout said. "Do you at least get to touch her boobs?"

"Ooh," Hiccup responded with a frightened look and turned around to lift his shirt, showing his peers the four long, jagged scratches down his back, which were only starting to heal over. "I got these just for trying!"

"Whoa!" all three replied.

Snotlout shook his head sadly and clapped Hiccup on the shoulder. "Man, I never thought I'd say this, but better you than me."

Hiccup nodded solemnly, as if resolved to accept his fate in life.

"Hey, guys, what's up?"

As one, all three boys jumped at the sound of the petite blonde's voice behind them, screeching like banshees.

"Astrid!"

"Oh, it's you!"

"We weren't talking about you or anything!"

"You know, I've got to go, my mom needs me!"

"Yeah, I hear my hag sister calling for me, bye!"

"Oh, uh, yeah, I need to go chop some wood. With my face! Later!"

The three boys rushed past her without waiting for a response and fled to the safety of the village as if the Green Death itself were on their tails.

Astrid folded her arms across her chest as she watched them leave, and then turned to Hiccup. "Why are you telling them I'm giving you all these marks?"

Hiccup grinned and shrugged, the fish still held firmly against his face. "Hey you can't buy fear and respect like that. And, it keeps Snotlout from hitting on you, so win-win."

She made a face at him and then moved forward and gently pulled his hand away from his face studying the bruise with a sympathetic look. Cupping his cheek, she leaned forward and placed several butterfly-light kisses along the injured flesh finally moving to his mouth where she gave him a proper and thorough greeting.

"Better?" she whispered against his lips as she pulled away.

"Much," he responded with a huge smile and tossed the cod over his shoulder. "Better than a smelly fish, for sure."

They linked hands and began to stroll back to the village. "You know," Astrid said casually, "you wouldn't get so hurt if you'd just stop letting that dragon sleep in the bed with you."

"Yeah, I know, but he's used to it by now. Besides, it's the snoring that's really unbearable."