Disclaimer: I DON'T…SHE DOES…I'M NOT…

WHERE'S YOUR BALLS

CHAPTER 1

"Hey, Les, Bobby. How are things?" Steph asked walking into the break room at Rangeman.

"Hey, Stephanie." Lester sneered. "If you're looking for Ranger...he's not here and I think it would probably be best if you left before he got back."

"Lester, is there a problem?"

Lester let out a disgusted huff of breath and continued flipping thru the magazine in his hands.

"Bobby, what's going on here? Is something wrong with Ranger?" Steph questioned with worry in her voice.

Before he could answer, Lester snapped at her yet again.

"Stephanie…" That was the second time he'd called her by her full name. What the hell was wrong with him? "…Let me guess…you and the cop are on an 'off again' phase and you're here to dangle the cheese in front of the mouse. Do you ever stop to think what that does to Ranger?"

"Lester…what the fuck is that supposed to mean? I'm here because I haven't seen you guys in a while. None of you call me anymore. I just missed you, that's all. Besides, Joe and I broke up three months ago…for good this time." Steph explained.

"Yeah, right. Everyone knows when you and the cop are fighting and everyone knows it's only a matter of time that the two of you will be back together." He sneered. "We've all seen it too many times."

"Morning, Bombshell. Haven't seen you around lately." Tank greeted her.

"Sorry, Tank…I was just leaving. Appears I'm not welcome here, anymore." Steph couldn't believe Lester had just attacked her. She thought they were friends.

"What? You're always welcome here. Where did you get that idea?" Tank questioned.

"Why don't you ask Lester? He seems to have a problem with me." Steph replied.

"Santos, is there something you'd like to share?" Tank demanded.

"Tank, everyone knows that she only comes around when she's fighting with the cop. She drops in, flirts with Ranger, sways her ass in front of him and gives him hope. She has him practically coming in his pants for her, just like a fucking teenager. Then, she yanks it all away and leaves him angry and unbearable.

We're always the ones left to pick up the pieces and put up with his bad moods. Hell most of the time…at least half of us end up in the ring with him. He beats his anger out on us.

I'm sorry, Steph, I just can't see how you can keep hurting him like you do. You say you care about him. If you did, you'd leave him alone. How many times are you going to keep giving him hope then reject him?"

"Rejection? Fucking rejected him? Let me tell you about rejection. I feel like a fucking whore. He steals kisses in the alley behind the bonds office. He feels me up while attaching my distraction wire and then walks away as if nothing ever happened…not even breathing heavy…totally unaffected. You want to talk about being a play toy…that's exactly what I am to him. I'm not fucking good enough to be any more than that to him.

Do you know what it's like to spend one amazing night with someone? Some one that you're so consumed with love for, you're willing to take whatever you can get from that person just to be near them. Of course you don't. Because men like you and Ranger…and the rest of you…" Steph said waving her hand around the room. "…are the ones that destroy times like that, not dwell on them for the rest of your life."

Steph was getting a little loud. A little may be an understatement. She was screaming at Lester. Cal, Hector and Hal came running into the break room to see what had happened.

She didn't care if she had an audience. She had kept this bottle up inside her since that night and damn it, she was going to have her say. It was eating her up inside. It was time for her to get it off her chest.

Maybe Ranger was the one she should be yelling at, but she hadn't seen him, much less talked to him in over two months and Lester just happened to be the one to open the can of worms…so to speak.

"Well, let me tell you. Ranger and I spent a night like that together. Yeah, you didn't know that did you? None of you knew he fucked me, did you? Well, he did and let me fill you in on what happened.

It's one of those times you spend the rest of your life trying to forget because you know that you'll never experience anything like it again. It was full of passion. The 'I'll never be the same after this' kind of passion.'

I gave him 'the cheese' as you like to call it, Lester. I gave him everything in me. I gave to him completely and when it was over…he crawled out of my bed, got dressed, told me to go back to Joe and walked out on me.

There was no room for me in his life. His type of love came with a condom not a ring or kids. He's been avoiding me every since. So…fuck you and fuck him." She screamed, flipping him both of her middle fingers.

"Do you know what it's like to know you're not enough? Not woman enough…not good enough for a man? The man you would give anything for…even your own life. Yeah, I'd give my own fucking life for him. I'll bet you don't know what it feels like. Well, let me tell you…it hurts. Fucking hurts like hell.

Yeah, I may have ran back to Joe, but…it beats being alone and rejected." By the time Steph finished her little rant, she had tears streaming down her face and the entire room had fallen silent. Steph wasn't sure if it was that no one knew what to say or all of them were just afraid to say anything.

Steph softly muttered, "If you can't have the one you love…love the one you're with." Then turned to walk out the break room.

When Steph turned to head out the door, she ran straight into Ranger. Oh fuck, she wondered just how much had he heard.

Oh well…it wasn't as if she could be anymore humiliated than she already was. Everyone at Rangeman now knew she was a failure as a woman.

She ran past Ranger. Hitting the stairs, not wanting to wait for the elevator. All she wanted was out of there as soon as her legs would carry her.

When Steph got to the parking garage, she stopped running. She leaned against the wall and let her body slide to the ground. With her face in her hands, she let it all out...months of anger and hurt was finally being released.

What else was she supposed to do? Steph forgot her purse, with her keys in it, it the break room. She had no way to leave and it was for damn sure she wasn't going back up there.

Ranger walked into the break room at the end of Steph's little speech. He heard most of what she said, but for the life of him, couldn't figure out what instigated her rant. The sad thing was all that said was true.

"What the fuck is going on in here? Why was Steph yelling?" Ranger demanded an explanation.

Santos surprised Ranger when he sucker punched him in the jaw.

"You sorry son of a bitch." He hissed at him. "All this time, I defended you."

"Because you're my friend, I'm going to give you a chance to explain what just happened before I kick the fuck out of you." Ranger warned.

Hal and Tank stepped between the two of them. Like that was actually going to stop Ranger. Sure Lester was his friend but he was also his employee. Ranger would never tolerate this kind of behavior from any of his employees.

"You want an explanation? I'll give you one. You're a sorry fucking piece of shit. I defended you, man. I felt sorry for you. I hated Steph for breaking your heart. I thought she was using you to fill her time until things were smoothed over with the cop.

You used her. You fucked her then threw her out like yesterday's trash. She honestly believes she's not woman enough for you." He laughed. "This is fucking funny. She thinks she wasn't good enough in bed to satisfy you.

The mighty Manoso has broken another woman. Another notch in your belt. How does it make you feel?"

Ranger felt like shit. The truth was…she was more woman than any man deserved. She was incredible. The most passionate, sexy woman he'd ever known. For all that she receives, she gives back…double.

"Stupid." Ranger finally muttered.

"Well, you have the stupidity covered…do you have the balls to fix it?" Lester sneered at his friend.

Ranger noticed Steph's purse on the table. He grabbed it and made a mad dash for the stairs. Maybe if she was still be there; he could tell her how sorry he was. What an incredible woman she was. How much…how much he loved her. Maybe he could fix things.

tbc

A/N: Ok, whata yaw think? Do yaw want the rest of the story? I admit it, I'm a review whore.