A/N : Yesshums! It's time for some Shuuhei x Kensei! This story is a bit sad I must say... R&R pwease yeah? Anyways, enjoy :D


"Shuuhei! Finally I got him! I finally got the love of my life to go out with me!" The vice captain of the 6th Division shouted and shook his best friend. Shuuhei just stood there, trying to process the information he just got.

"Are you talking about Kuchiki-taichou?" He finally managed to croak out.

"Of course I am, who else could it be? Shuuhei, this is probably the best day of my life!" Renji jumped and shouted.

"Oh." Pain was eating the insides of Shuuhei's chest. He stayed silent, holding back the urge to scream at his best friend whom he had loved for so long.

"Shuuhei? Aren't you happy for me at all?" Renji's smile faded as a frown started to show. Shuuhei looked up at his best friend who was half worried, half hurt at his reaction.

"You actually managed to get Kuchiki-taichou to go out with you?" Shuuhei punched Renji on his arm and broke into a huge grin. "That's super awesome, man! You shocked me like crazy back there!"

"Fuck, you were the one who shocked me. You grew silent all of a sudden. I thought you got heart-broken because this piece of hunk finally got him a lover or something." They both laughed and headed to the nearby eatery to celebrate with cold beer. One with a truly happy heart, the other with a heart which just turned into rubbles. One with a real smile, one with a fake one.

That was one week ago. But it still pains him even now.

"What are you doing here? It's cold like crazy" Shuuhei turns his head around to see a man with his hands in his pockets, face stern as usual. The moon is full tonight and he decided to go to the cliff deep inside the forest to cool his head.

"Muguruma-san, what are you doing here?"

"That's my question. You're supposed to answer, not ask back." The man in the black jacket says.

"Nothing, sir. Just clearing my head." Shuuhei hugs his thick blanket closer. Perhaps having a sleeveless shihakusho and wearing it in the middle of winter is not that smart.

"Oh, come on. Don't 'sir' me. You don't know how old that makes me feel. Besides, how many times have I told you to call me Kensei? May I?" Shuuhei nods and Kensei sits down on the log beside him. "So? What's up? I know you're having a problem, so spill it."

"You can't do this you know. You rarely visit and when you do you always want to know what's going on in my life." Shuuhei sighs.

"Hey, I'm just trying to be kind here." Kensei shrugs. They say nothing for a while and the chilly winter wind blows.

"Renji got himself a lover." Shuuhei says shortly.

"Renji? Your best friend?"

"Yeah. Renji, Kuchiki-taichou's vice captain." Shuuhei smiles at the thought, looking longingly to the starry sky.

"Haha, must be a tough guy to work under a Kuchiki. So what's the deal? Isn't it good?"

"Yeah, I guess so."

"Then why are you so down? You look like your younger self, chased down by a hollow."

"I love him." Kensei scrunches his face.

"What?" He sounds shocked.

"I love Renji. And honestly, being the first and probably one of the few to know that he's dating Kuchiki-taichou is eating me up inside." Shuuhei laughs bitterly. He's hurting, he's angry. But at who? At Renji? No, it's not Renji's fault to pursue his love.

"So basically you're heart-broken because Renji, the guy you love, is dating his captain." Kensei makes a statement to clear things up.

"Yeah, that's basically it." Kensei isn't that surprised about the fact that Shuuhei fell in love with Renji. They have been hanging out since they were still dimwitted teenagers. And they've gone through lots of hardships together. They were once inseparable. At least that's what Shuuhei said.

Without thinking, Kensei pulls Shuuhei into a big hug and pats his back.

"You know, it's okay if you want to cry." Shuuhei chuckles at his remark.

"Kensei-san, I'm not that weak. I may be feeling down, but crying isn't necessary." Shuuhei's half lying. He wants to let his feelings out. Rage won't help, so the only way to let his heart out without hurting someone is to cry. Kensei sighs and pulls away just so that he can see into Shuuhei's dark grey eyes.

"I know you're strong. If you're weak, I would've ripped that tattoo off of your face." Kensei's thumb runs along the lines of the '69' tattoo on Shuuhei's face. "I would never share a tattoo with a weakling."

"That's why I won't cry." Shuuhei says even though he is struggling to fight the tears from falling.

"You still have feelings, Shuuhei. There's nothing wrong with crying. I know you well enough to see that you're struggling with all of this. You're hurt. Just cry it all out and feel better already." Without any more encouraging, droplets of tears start falling. Kensei hugs the other man tightly and coos. "There, there…"

"I'm sorry… I didn't mean to be like this." Shuuhei doesn't sob, there are just tears rolling.

"Don't be sorry. Who wouldn't feel broken hearted when someone they love looks so happy with someone other than himself."

"It hurts so much. I don't know how to deal with this. Jealousy enrages me and hurt me at the same time." He draws a deep breath to steady his voice. "I'm tired. I'm so tired, Kensei-san. I try to keep calm, but sometimes I'm just so tired of suppressing all my feelings. I don't know anyone I can talk to concerning all of this."

"Then come to me. You have me, you know. We can set a place and time where we can talk. Then you won't have to feel so tired anymore." Once again Kensei pulls away and wipes Shuuhei's tears. "Share your burden with me."

"Kensei-san, I can't trouble you more. This is already more than enough… You're very kind, but I have to turn down the offer."

"Why can't I help you?" Kensei's expression grows hard.

"I just don't want to trouble you. I didn't mean to offend you at all." Shuuhei sounds worried. He had troubled him once, he's not going to do it again.

"I want to help you."Because I love you and I can't stand seeing you in pain. Oh how Kensei wants to say that… In fact he almost did, but that would only confuse the younger man even more. "Let's just say you're already a part of my life. I saved you once, I can save you twice."

"Thank you, Kensei-san. Thank you so much." Shuuhei snuggles closer and Kensei hugs even tighter. Kensei too can feel a pang of pain of an unrequited love. The winter wind blows harder, colder.

'Someday soon, I'll tell you how much I love you. And I'll make you believe that you mean a lot to me.' Kensei buries his nose on Shuuhei's hair while a smile on Shuuhei's face starts to show. 'I love you, Shuuhei.'


A/N : Isn't it rather... depressing? D: Aw man, you two...

Shuuhei : *calm* I've moved on...

Renji : Shuuhei... You love me? *shocked*

Shuuhei : *calm* Loved.

Renji : Shit man... Sorry about this.

Kensei : Stay away from him, will ya? *angry*

Renji : Hey, calm down... I'm just trying to apologize.

Kensei : A bit late, don't you think, punk? *grrr*

Byakuya : Don't talk to my lover like that, Vizard. *menacing glare, draws Senbonzakura*

Kensei : You, don't talk to me like that. *glares back, draws Tachikaze*

Shuuhei : *calm-ness gone* Kensei-san, please don't fight. No need for violence.

Renji : Byakuya... *worries and scared*

Byakuya & Kensei : *battle cry* HIAAAAAAAA!

Renji & Shuuhei : *whines* Oh man...