"And This Old World is a New World is a Bold World for Me"

by: singyourmelody

Disclaimer: Title is from Nina Simone's "Feeling Good." Song lyrics are from All American Rejects' "Dance Inside." Don't own either of the characters. I really can't believe I'm revisiting this 'ship again. I guess I kinda thought I was passed this, but then this thought popped into my head and it just had to get out. It's supposed be set during their sophomore year at Julliard. I don't think I actually say that anywhere in this fic.

now i'm twisted up when i'm twisted with you
brush so lightly
and time trickles down and i'm breathing for two

we'll dance inside the song

He's three inches away from her and breathing heavily and she's not even sure how they got here, but she thinks it had something to do with a chord.

D chord, she thinks to herself, trying to focus.

She's breathing heavily too.

Fifteen minutes ago her fingers were flying over the keys and he was sitting next to the piano, his eyes closed, just listening to her play.

She loves looking at him when he is lost in her music.

"That's wrong," he said, interrupting her melody.

"What?" she asked, fingers reluctantly sliding off of the keys.

"That sequence." He got up and sat next to her and played what she had just played, stopping just short of where he had cut her off. "You need to move up to an F chord here. Listen." He began playing again and she stared at him.

"Um, Ryan, I'm the composer and it needs to be a D chord."

"No, it's better as an F."

"No, it's not."

"Kelsi, it is."

"Okay, listen. I don't bust into your dance classes and tell you that the latest number you're choreographing is wrong, so you shouldn't do that to my—"

"It's good, I'll give you that," he said, cutting her off. "But it could be so much better. Just go to the F chord."

She's sure the look on her face was a mix of incredulity and anger.

She exhaled. "I like it the way it is," she said evenly.

"But it could be so much better."

"You don't even know what you are talking about," she said, stepping closer to him.

"I don't?" he asked, stepping closer to her.

"No! I'm not going to change it because you tell me to. This isn't high school anymore."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means that I took orders from everyone back at East High, but that was then and this is now," her words were sounding harsh and she didn't mean them to, only maybe she did.

His eyes narrowed and he was looking at her, really looking at her and she hates it when he does that.

"Nobody can boss you around unless you let them," he said finally, leaning in.

"And I'm not letting them anymore," she countered.

He's three inches away from her now and she can almost feel his breath on her upper lip and she sounds like she's so sure, but she's not. Not about anything anymore.

"So don't," is all he says and she forgets why she's there and why he's there and what were they talking about again?

Chords. Chords, right.

"Why are you standing so close to me?" she whispers.

"Why are you letting me?" he responds and she really has no idea what to do with that. None at all.

"The D chord stays," is all she says, her eyes flicking up to meet his in an act of defiance and suddenly his hands are reaching behind her head and his lips are crashing into hers and it's like they're fighting, but not.

And it's hands and tongues and half whispered words and give and take and she wonders how they have lasted this long without doing this.

Whatever this is, arguing, kissing, it's good, very good and she doesn't want it to stop, but he slows it down. His mouth stops moving so fast and she follows his lead. The kiss deepens and suddenly her entire body is pressed against his and somehow she's sitting on the keys and the chord that she makes sounds terrible but she doesn't really care.

Something like the need for oxygen makes her pull away from him and her eyes are wide and she's hoping he's not going to use the words that every guy in every romantic comedy seems to use. "That was a mistake." "We shouldn't have done that." "Um, I didn't mean to cross that line." blurs together in her head as she looks at him.

He smiles a crooked smile and then looks down at their hands that are still intertwined.

"You wanna get out of here?" he asks and she can't help but feel relief pass over her body.

"Yes."

They wind up at her dorm room. Sabrina, Drama Queena, as Ryan calls her, is gone for the night, so they have the whole room to themselves and she's not sure if that's a good thing or a bad thing.

Be honest. Good thing, she thinks.

She makes them ramen because being a college student means she only has a microwave at her disposal and they share a bowl. He slurps the noodles and ends up getting broth all over her face but she laughs every time and slurps them right back at him. She puts on Nina Simone while they work on their homework. Or at least try to. She can't think with him a foot away from her on her bed and the paper she's supposed to be writing about the musical trends of the 1800s has only one sentence: "Music was really popular in the 1800s." Yeah, she's so getting an "A" on that one. She decides to focus instead on keeping her breathing steady but she keeps looking up at him over her laptop screen and he's biting on the end of his pencil. And she smiles at the fact that every time she looks up at him, he's looking right back at her.

"Screw it," she says as she quickly shuts her computer screen and sets it on the bed next to her. He looks up at her then; he really was making an effort at his reading, she realizes. She thinks that's sweet. But then he sets down his book and his pencil and suddenly it's like she's possessed by some seductive starlet from "Chicago" and she's crawling over to him, one leg on either side of his, and touching his hair and his lips lower to hers and she can't think anymore. Not that she really could before. How did this start again? Something beginning with the letter "D"?

His arms are wrapped around her waist as he lowers them back onto her bed and Nina is singing "Feeling Good," which was always one of her favorite songs and seems so apropos for this moment, but she's suddenly feeling a little, no make that a lot, nervous.

But this is Ryan and she's wanted this for so so long that she can't back down now. His lips have moved down to her collarbone and she suddenly realizes that he has wanted this too. And that thought makes her hands reach down to the bottom of his tee-shirt and she moves to pull it up over his head. He backs away from her for just a moment so that she can actually get his shirt off and then it's gone and he's back to making contact and she decides that she loves the feeling of his skin on hers.

So much so that it doesn't even compute when her shirt is gone too and she's lying underneath him in just her lacy camisole and her jeans? She reaches down to her thigh quickly. Yes, they're still on, she breathes a little sigh of relief, because there's all so much happening so fast and she's loving it, but that little thing in her chest won't go away. He's kissing her shoulder now and her lips are on his earlobe and she could get completely lost in this moment, right here, right now, nothing but him.

But she won't let herself. Not yet.

"Ryan." She says quietly.

"Yeah?" he mumbles between kisses.

"Can we stop?" she asks, and she's half hoping he'll say no, because a part of her doesn't want to stop ever. But he's not like that and she knows that and that's why she's with him right now.

He pulls away reluctantly and sits back away from her. His hair is a complete mess and he gives her the same crooked grin that he gave her before and she thinks he's never looked more adorable.

"Okay," he breathes out. They don't say anything for a moment. Nina is between songs and the only noise in the room is his breathing. It's like he's trying to cool himself down. She knows she is doing the same.

"I'm sorry," she blurts out finally.

He shakes his head. "What?"

"I'm sorry for stopping. I just—" she trails off, looking away.

He reaches over and holds her hand. "Hey, you never have to be sorry about that, okay?" he moves his head down to make eye contact with her.

"It's just that. . . it's just that I'm not sure how I would handle having my first kiss and losing my virginity in the same day," she says, her words rushed. She wanted to get it all out as quickly as possible.

He looks away then and runs his hand through his tousled hair. "Your first kiss and. . . yeah, I could see how that might be a lot for one day."

They sit for a nice, long, awkward moment before his finally says, "You've never kissed anybody before?"

"No. Was I really that bad?"

"Are you kidding me right now?" he asks, looking at her in that way that she can't always read, but she always loves.

"No. . ."

"Kelsi, you were amazing. I had no idea that you hadn't ever kissed a guy before."

She smiles at him and moves to sit next to him, laying her head on his bare shoulder. After a minute, he rests his head on hers.

"So, when was yours?" she asks.

"My what?"

"First kiss."

He lifts his head and looks at her.

"Seventh grade music camp. Vanessa Sandler. She was hot," he says, grinning.

She punches him lightly.

"Hey!" he says, rubbing his arm. "She's got nothing on you though."

"Nice cover," she says. "And I'm not changing the chord."

"What? I did all that making out for nothing?" he says, teasingly. He stands and reaches for his tee-shirt. "Remind me not to do any more sexual favors for you."

"I'd never ask you to. Boyfriends do them for free," she teases back. She's not sure where this flirty side is coming from, but she likes how open it makes her feel.

He nods slightly, eyes locked on hers, a grin tugging on the corners of his lips.

"And what do girlfriends do?" he asks. She stands and takes the tee-shirt from his hands.

"They help dress their boyfriends," she says, gently pulling the tee-shirt over his head, "and they help fix their hair," she says as she runs her fingers through his blonde hair. "And they tell their boyfriends secrets," she whispers in his ear.

"What secrets?" he whispers back, an amused look on his face.

"Secrets about a boy and a girl and feelings."

"I'm listening."

"Secrets that nobody else knows."

"Mmhmm. . ." his says, wrapping his arms around her. She fits so well right there.

She pulls him close and places her mouth half an inch from his ear. "I love you," she says so softly, she's not sure he heard her.

She moves back a little to gauge his reaction. His eyes seem to shine.

"Well that's a good thing," he whispers back into her ear. "Because I love you too."

She kisses him then, careful to not let things get too out of control.

He pulls back and says only one thing, "It really should be an F chord."

She tugs lightly on his hair and raises one eyebrow. "And maybe we'll just have to settle this another time."

Well, there's another one for ya. I love Kelsi and Ryan together. They're just so cute. I still wish (even now, years later) that there were more scenes with them in the HSM canon. Ah, what can you do? Thanks for reading and reviewing. Love!