For You, Jane

Disclaimer: I appreciate but don't own the characters. They belong to Tess Gerritsen and TNT Network. Thanks for the loan. I'll take good care of them.

Chapter 8- "I Put a Hundred Bucks on You, Jane"

"What's this?" Detective Vince Korsak, Jane's ex-partner, eyed the white box teetering on Jane's left arm with three small bags on top of it. She held her extra large coffee in the right hand, purse over right shoulder all precariously balanced as she made her way to her desk. "Monday isn't your donut day."

"I stopped at the bakery for something so I figured as long as I was there, I'd supplement with pastry." She unloaded then deposited a bag on Korsak's desk and one with Detective Barry Frost, her partner.

"Kolachkis," Korsak reached into the bag, "I love these things."

"Hey, a muffin," Frost placed it on his desk to admire it. "Thanks, Jane."

"What's the occasion?" Korsak questioned her through a mouthful of cookie.

"No occasion. Can't I do something nice?"

"No," he chuckled.

"Fine. I'll take them back."

Korsak shielded his bag of treasure. "What's his name, Jane?" Korsak said, stuffing one more into his mouth.

"What? No. There's no...Jesus, Korsak." Jane sat down at her desk. She thought 'shit, shit, shit' as she turned away from him. She tried to will her face not to flush. She ripped open bag after bag of sugar and poured them into her coffee.

"Jane, did you get some this weekend?" Frost joined in. Jane shot him a glare. She couldn't help thinking 'not some, a lot.'

"C'mon, Jane, don't jerk us around, spill," Korsak continued.

"Don't you have something to do, like work?" At least a half dozen lie possibilities flashed through her mind but she didn't use them. "I just had a good weekend. My phone didn't ring."

Korsak smiled at Frost.

"You guys are cut off." Jane stared at the remaining bag. It was for Maura. She was about to dig into the box of pastry when her phone went off. She pulled it out of her purse. "Weekend over. We got a body." Jane put Maura's bag safely back in her drawer along with her purse. Frost re bagged his muffin and followed her out.

The sun was bright but the air chilled, on the cusp of Fall. It was a nice house in an upper middle-class neighborhood. Patrol had the scene taped off, CSU van was there, morgue truck, and of course Maura's black Mercedes, parked out front. As Jane pulled her hair back into a ponytail, she looked at herself in the window of her car and practiced her "everything is normal and I'm not really melting inside" expression she would use when she looked into Maura's face. As Jane and Frost strode up the front walk, two cops met them, one hung back with his hand over his mouth.

"That's not a good sign," Jane said. She balled her hands into fists a couple times as they approached the steps.

The young uni who was keeping it together better than his partner, flipped open his notepad.

"Detective Rizzoli, Frost," he greeted them with an unusually big smile on his face. He handed Jane a driver's license. "We got an anonymous phone tip about a, quote "dead lady, I totally did not kill," unquote, this morning and patrol found a 62 year old female vic, Rose Kelly, in the bathroom, a lot of mail piled up, laptop and money from her wallet missing, and some puke in the kitchen which may be the perps. We think it's an accidental that the our perp, the tipster, discovered during the B & E. We're checking on next of kin but coming up empty." He continued to smile at Jane which unnerved her.

"Thanks," Jane said. "Let's hope that's what it is." She and Frost slipped on booties and gloves. Jane looked back at the unis both of which were now smiling at her. She wanted to say 'what the hell are you smiling about?' but held herself in check. She and Frost went in.

"Oh," Frost's hand went directly to his face momentarily at the unmistakable smell of decaying flesh.

Jane scanned the entry room and living room. The walls displayed awards and commendations from a city job but were devoid of personal photos. It was very tidy with a big TV, dvd, and array of collectibles probably procured during some lonely home shopping network marathons.

"Didn't this woman have a family or something?" Jane commented.

"Guess she lived alone," Frost commented through his hand.

Jane picked up a figurine of a green parrot from a group of various animals and held it up to Frost, "if this is where I am at 62, come over and shoot me."

"You aren't gonna be alone, Jane," Frost grinned, "and if you are, you can come and live in the gatehouse of my mansion."

"Your mansion? Good luck with that."

Jane and Frost followed the trail of CSU people coming down the stairs up to the master bath. Maura, crouched beside the victim, was dressed in a deep blue skirt, matching jacket, and a knit gray top with a rounded neck cut just low enough for a tiny bit of cleavage. Rose Kelly lay naked in a small puddle of bowel and bladder contents. The odor was striking but not the worst Jane had ever experienced. Jane looked down at Maura's dark blond hair falling over her shoulders and her mind somewhat replaced the stench assaulting her nose with the memory of the scent of her hair. CSU had turned the vic over and the purple lividity marks on her face and torso that were stomach turning. Frost gagged and disappeared. The sound made Maura look up.

"Hi Jane and...Frost," she called after him. She smiled at Jane.

"Hi, Doc. Please tell me this was an accident so I can leave."

"It's a strong possibility. I told you, Jane, the majority of accidents happen in..."

"Bathrooms. Yeah."

"Of course I won't know until I do the examination and see the films, but there are no contusions that would indicate a struggle or other obvious signs of external trauma save the one to her head. " Maura began to palpate Rose Kelly's skull, "the deformation of the temporal bone here conforms in size and shape to the corner of the sink..."

Jane's stared at Maura's face, focused on her mouth, her lips, but not the words. Her mind drifted back to the feeling of those lips on hers, on her breasts, her stomach, her... The sensation between her legs snapped Jane back to the present.

"How long has she been here?" Jane asked.

"I told you. She's out of rigor. At least four..."

"Jesus, she'd still be here oozing if there hadn't been a break-in."

"I said that too, though not in those terms. You weren't listening were you?"

"I was listening. She slipped and hit her head on the sink."

"Jane," Maura sighed. She suddenly noticed Jane was looking at the front of her blouse. "Are you looking at my breasts?"

Jane took a quick glance outside the bathroom to see if anyone was in earshot. "Maura!"

"You were." She tilted her head and grinned, "Jane." Maura found it complimentary.

Jane dabbed her forehead with the sleeve of her black pants suit jacket. She handed Maura the driver's license.

"It's her, right?"

"I will confirm it with dental records, but she appears consistent."

Jane sighed. "Are you about done?"

"Yes."

Jane surprised herself by instinctively holding out her hand to help Maura to her feet. She thought 'is it weird that I just did that? Over thinking, Rizzoli.'

"Thank you."

She smiled. "Wait for me at your car."

Maura stood by her car patiently waiting for Jane. Frost walked towards her

"So Doc, was this an accident?"

"It is a possibility."

He nodded.

Jane exited the front of the house and started toward Maura's car. When she saw Frost talking to Maura, she doubled her pace to a walk/run.

"Did Jane have a date this past weekend?"

"Jane was..." Maura started slowly, preparing to force out the half truth she had practiced.

Jane arrived. "Hey, Frost, could you check on the canvassing?"

"Patrol is already on it. They may have a suspect for the break-in—a local kid. Probably needed money to pay his cell phone bill or something."

"How about the time line on when the vic was last seen? Anyone know anything?"

"I guess neighbors aren't up in each other's business around here."

"Huh." Jane was going to have to be more direct with her partner. She released her hair from the ponytail. Maura was momentarily riveted not only by the by the visual but by Jane's smell which was no longer masked by the crime scene. She silently pondered the existence of same sex pheromone attraction and if she could pick Jane's scent out from that of other women or men.

"Could you wait in the car? I need a minute with the Doc. Girl talk."

"Ah, okay."

"Thanks."

He eyed them and walked away.

"I'm kinda freakin' out here, Maura. I don't know if I can do this."

"Do what?"

"This, this! Keep this a secret. Korsak and Frost wanted to know who I had sex with over the weekend. I was too happy er something."

"Jane," Maura grinned, "are you happy?"

"Yeah, but apparently I'm not supposed to be. This is just, you know, harder than I thought."

"Are you going to tell them?"

"No." Jane tucked her hair behind her ear.

Maura frowned, she knew this was a sign that Jane was nervous, unsure.

"Jane, does that mean you are breaking up with me? We've only been together 26 hours and (she checked her watch) 37 minutes."

Jane stared at her with wide eyes. Only Maura. But here was the hurt Maura face, the I'm about to lose it Maura face.

"No. No, Sweetie." She put her hand on Maura's arm. "It's just hard to concentrate on work today. I mean, decomp couldn't even distract me from thinking about what we did."

"It was memorable," Maura smiled. "I find it humorous that you are finding it difficult to act normal considering how you drilled it into me this morning."

"I know. Sorry. It's just..." Jane paused. "I'd like to make out with you right now in the back of your car."

"I'd like that too but if you want to conceal our relationship that would not be wise."

"Ye-ah. Okay, I'll see you back at headquarters." She patted her arm. "I have something for you." She watched Maura drive away before she headed back to the car and Frost.

Before she could start it, Frost began to probe the odd interaction.

"So what's up between you and Maura?"

"Nothing's up."

"Come on, Jane. Girl talk? She looked like she was gonna cry. Did you guys have a fight?"

Jane gripped the wheel. She looked into Frost's liquid chocolate eyes and and decided to trust him. She never thought it would be this difficult keeping something happy in her life a secret or would have to. But if anyone could keep it, it should be her partner. Plus, she felt the sudden pull of vanity. "You can't tell anyone, Barry."

"I won't."

"I slept with Maura."

Frost raised his eyebrows.

"What? Are you messing with me, Jane?"

"I am so not messing with you." They stared. Frost's mouth was slightly open.

"She was so fucking hot, I've never come like that."

Frost suddenly got out of the car and removed his suit jacket and laid it on his seat. He stepped back from the car then leaned in, head down, supporting his weight on the door frame. The pose looked similar to the post-gore, pre-vomit Frost.

"Come on Frost, really? I thought you'd be more...tolerant?" Jane was shocked and disappointed. Jane leaned over into the passenger's side. " I thought you guys liked to hear about (whispers) lesbians."

Frost got back in the car and draped his jacket over his lap.

"That's the problem, we do." He adjusted his ass in the seat.Jane looked at his lap and figured it out.

"Oh. Oh, you've got a..."

"I'm sensitive to many stimuli, not just corpses. It's a whole other kind of embarrassing."

"I'd take care of that for you but I'm not into dicks right now" Jane chuckled.

"Maura is a lesbian?"

"I don't know. She said it was her first time."

Frost, dubious stare.

"And you've never had sex with a woman?"

"No!" Jane's normally husky voice broke a little.

Frost, more dubious.

"Not until Saturday night...and Sunday morning, and Sunday night."

"Damn, Jane. What happened to Sunday afternoon?"

"Shopping. But it's not like I didn't try."

"While you were shopping?"

"She was already half naked in those dressing rooms."

Frost groaned and shook his head.

"So, what was she like?" He vaguely gestured around his chest, the universal sign for breasts.

Jane, mock surprise on her face, was about to make some sort of quip about his disgusting thoughts but then she reached in her jacket pocket, took out her cell and began to scroll through menus.

"I don't know if I'm the best judge but.."

Frost craned his neck anticipating a photo.

"God, Frost, you are too easy!" she laughed and put her cell away.

Frost shook his head and stared out the windshield. Jane watched him, his expression. Then she realized. Frost turned to her.

"Are you... in love with her?" Frost queried.

"You like Maura, don't you?"

He looked at her then forward again.

"Oh man, I'm sorry, Frost."

"Yeah, I bet you are," he waited a beat, then cracked a smile. "Just be good to her, okay?"

Jane nodded.

"You gotta give me something, Jane."

"No, I don't."

"The Doc is a freak, isn't she?"

"No! Well, maybe a little."

"Yeah?"

"We did stuff I didn't know women could do."

"Killing me, Jane."

"I can't imagine what she could do to guy."

Frost grumbled and rubbed his face with his hands. As if he didn't have enough images running through his brain.

"I've got a secret too and I might as well tell you."

"You're gay for Korsak."

"You do want to see me vomit." Frost took a breath. "I know this was wrong, but I have a friendly wager with someone that you and Maura would get together...intimately."

"Uh-huh. Nice, Frost. Everyone thinks I'm gay?" Jane gave him the dead serious Jane face. "Who did you wager with?"

"I can't say."

"Frost!"

" I can tell you that I won. I put a hundred bucks on you, Jane."
"You think I'm gay?"

"It was just a joke, Jane. But now that you and Maura... man, I knew it! I knew she was into you. More than friends. I thought one day you'd see the light and hit that."

"I did hit that. And she hit this. Crap. You cannot collect, Frost. It cannot get out." She paused. "I'll cover the bet if I have to. I can't believe it. You're my partner for chrissakes." Jane rested her forehead on the steering wheel.

"Yeah, I'm your partner. Why didn't you tell me you liked girls?"

"I'm not gay!" Jane brushed her hair back then threw her hands up. "Well, I guess I must be sorta gay."

"It's cool. I told you I won't tell."

Silence. Jane put her hands over her face and sighed/growled.

"So how did you..." he started.

"Jesus, Frost."

"No, I mean how did this happen? No dating, no hand-holding, no first kiss, just 'bam' ?"

"Pretty much. Too many sleepovers. I think I just wanted a hug and then we were fucking. Maybe we've been dating for a while without knowing we were dating."

"That's exactly what I told Frankie. Damn."

"It's Frankie? You bet with Frankie? God. You absolutely cannot tell him. This is my family."

"Relax, Jane. I'm gonna need a muffin every day though."

Glare from Jane.

"I'm kidding."

"At least Frankie thinks I'm not gay."

"A lot of people, mostly of the male variety, think you're not gay."

"Maura hears stuff, you hear stuff, why don't I hear anything?"

"It's not your style, Jane—gossip, talking shit."

"Well, if I hear anything now, I'm coming for you."

Police Dept. Headquarters, Autopsy, Dr. Isles in her scrubs

Maura found herself paused during her exterior examination of Rose Kelly. Recalling Jane's, taut, warm skin under her fingertips made handling this putrefying body seem alien and currently incapable of holding her attention. She was aggravated at herself for losing focus and not working with the normal speed and precision she was used to. 'Hormones,' she thought, 'things will improve.' She would not be overpowered by her own biology. Plus the reward of finishing was lunch with Jane.

Jane's desk

Jane sat at her computer typing the same report for an over an hour. She was relieved that Korsak's questions stopped once she told him she just went out with Maura and did some shopping. Skillful withholding of information. A few glances at Frost and the folder in and out of his lap told her he was having an unproductive morning as well, probably for the same reason—Maura Isles. Jane let this "thing" with Maura go round and round in her mind: 'we will screw up our lives and friendship—Frost would probably be better for her, or, this could work out, at least for a while, especially if we keep it private, and then I just want to be with her asap and fuck the rest.' Jane thought 'if I can just get through today.'

"Jane."

Jane whirled around and knocked her coffee over onto the previous report that had taken two hours.

"Shit."

"I'm sorry." Maura helped her contain the spill.

"It's fine, I'll reprint it."

"What do you want to do for lunch? I didn't have time to prepare anything this morning."

They looked at each other with half grins.

"Yeah, me neither. I'm not very hungry. I've had one and a half donuts and a pastry."

"Pastry?" Maura questioned.

"I got you one." Jane produced the bag and Maura opened it.

"Ooo, a chocolate éclair! Thank you, Jane."

"I got kolachkis," Korsak turned and commented.

"I got a muffin," Frost added.

"Jane was feeling generous today. I don't know what you did to make Jane like shopping but she was pretty jazzed about her weekend, Doc," Korsak said.

"Jane just needs the proper motivation," Maura smiled, "food."

"Just like a man, Jane," Korsak chuckled.

"Cafe. Let's go," Jane stood and ushered Maura out the door.

Lunch at Maura's desk in the morgue

Maura sat at her desk picking at a salad and Jane across from her with a half eaten cup of yogurt and an unopened bag of cheese curls.

"I can't eat anymore of this," Jane put down the yogurt and took a swig of coffee.

"Epinephrine, or more commonly, adrenaline," Maura replied and put away her salad, "or endorphins."

"Is everything endorphins with you?"

Maura smiled. "The release of endorphins pulls blood away from the stomach, preventing digestion and giving one a fluttery feeling. Some popular terms are butterflies, love sickness, or being lovestruck."

"God, I'm sixteen again."

"Is that so bad?" she laughed. "I feel it too."

"I didn't feel this way before."

"You weren't having sex with me before."

Jane groaned and rolled her eyes.

"I may as well go for the full neurochemical rush." Maura removed her éclair from the bag.

"Do you want to split it with me, Jane?"

"No. All yours, Sweetie."

Jane watched every bite Maura took, compared each of her little moans of satisfaction with the ones she heard over the weekend. Maura was quite aware of the rapt attention of her friend when she dove into the custard filling with her tongue.

"Uh," Jane murmured and adjusted herself in the chair.

"Are you sure you don't want some? "

"It's working."

"What is?" Maura smiled.

"If you're trying to drive me crazy with your pornographic éclair eating, it's working."

Maura laughed and finished, licking her lips for chocolate remnants then produced an antibacterial towelette for final clean-up. "Yummy," she said and leaned back in her chair.

"You seem the same as always. How are you doing it? I've been going out of my mind thinking everybody can tell, and now I'm getting wet just sitting here with you."

"Oh, oh. I'm flattered , Jane. I'm doing my best, like you asked. Although, I have encountered some difficulty maintaining my focus. Tasks are taking me 9 to 12 minutes longer."

"That's...just...unacceptable," Jane said, mocking her. "Been thinkin' about me, eh?" Jane smiled and leaned forward in her chair.

"That's a very self-satisfied smile." "I'm serious, Jane. I can't think."

"Well I need new underwear."

"I have some if you really..."

"No, I'll manage."

"Are we going to spend the evening together, Jane?"

"You're joking, right? As soon as we get outta here and back to my apartment, I plan on being all over you."

"That sounds wonderful."

Afternoon, morgue

Maura was breaking down. She sat at a lab station re-reading reports. She realized she had turned two pages without actually reading them. She stopped and gave herself up to undivided Jane contemplation. On the periphery of her mind were her fears that either Jane would end it before it had a chance or, perhaps more daunting, that it would develop into a real relationship that she would be forced to keep hidden like some sordid, clandestine affair. Maura let her mind guide her away from the uncertainty to back to Jane. She thought back to the first touch of Jane's lips on the palm of her hand. She thought of how incredibly sweet it was to be with Jane-so sensual and exciting and so easy, comfortable. She remembered the purr of Jane's voice in her ear before she kissed her: 'Maura, it's okay.'

"Maura."

Jane was standing next to her.

"Oh, I didn't hear you."

"Endorphins affect the hearing too?"

"Yes, I mean, no. What do you need, Jane?"

"Did you rule on our Eleanor Rigby from this morning?"

"Beatles' Revolver, 1966." Maura gathered up the reports. "Rose Kelly, Natural death."

"That's it? There's usually more."

"Cerebral aneurysm, inter craniall hematoma,hemorrhagicc stroke, unconsciousness, sink, additional ich, death." Maura watched Jane peruse the results. "She lived alone, yes, but do you think she was lonely, Jane?"

Jane sat down next to her with her back and elbows resting on the table. "I know I don't wanna go out like that. I want to be with people I love." Jane smiled at Maura. "You know, people that would bury me."

They stared at each other.

"Jane."

"Yeah."

"If I can't have my hands on you soon, I'm going to die." Maura paused. "Not literally, of course. It's hyperbole."

"Stock room." Jane eyed the nearby supply closet and stood.

"No, Jane, we can't! Not here. That would be unprofessional."

Jane gestured at her own body, "Do you want a taste or not?"

Maura narrowed her eyes at her. "I do but under protest. My decision making abilities are impaired."

In the stockroom, Maura flipped on the light. Jane apprehensively watched her close the door.

"We won't be locked in," Maura assured her. Jane tried the door anyway.

They stood for an anticipatory moment before Jane took Maura's face in her hands and backed her up against the shelving. They kissed fervently, breathing into each other, sending shocks of pleasure from the centers of their bodies down to their clits. Maura's hands on Jane's back dipped below her belt and pulled the back of her shirt out of her pants so she could have her hands on Jane's bare skin. Jane slid one hand then the other between them onto Maura's breasts and began to rub her nipples with her thumbs. The quiet of the small room was broken by medical supplies toppling over on the shelves, Maura's gasps and Jane's deep-toned moans. Maura's hands moved over the top of Jane's hips onto her waist and then the bottom of her ribs. She was so smooth and warm and ready. It took all Maura's will not to unfasten Jane's belt. Jane felt Maura pulling back, gathering herself in, and did the same. She put her arms around Maura's waist and her cheek against hers.

"Save it for later, huh Sweetie?"

Maura nodded. They stepped back from each other, breathing hard. Jane tucked her shirt back into her pants.

"I have to go home first but I'll be over as soon as I can," Maura said, adjusting her jacket over her breasts. They stepped out of the stockroom.

"You have..." Maura pointed at Jane then at her own lips. "Not really your color."

Jane wiped her lips with the underside of the collar of her shirt.

"Good?"

"Yes."

"A couple more hours. Tell me when you're ready to leave."

"I will."

Jane took a deep breath, grabbed her reports, and left. Maura went directly to her office and collapsed in her chair.

On her way back to her desk, Jane tried a little introspection: 'Am I gay? Why do I care if people find out? If I care, I shouldn't make out in stockrooms. What if I'm not? What if I'm straight with a Maura Isles problem? I can't be straight after last weekend. Is she gay? Being bi together would be a happy medium.'

Gay, straight, bi. She decided not to spend any more time thinking about it the uncertainty but rather buoy herself up with what she was sure of. 'I just want her. I need her. Her.'

Next: Chapter 9—I Like the Way You Look in My Bed