The Umbran Apprentices

Chapter 2

Jeanne would lead Grill, Static, and I into a bar that called itself 'The Gates of Hell,' where behind the bar-table was a bald, African-looking man in a red coat, who happened to be the bartender. Sitting in front of the bar-table was some mafia-man from America, drinking so much of the bartender's liquor that he grew drunk and miserable.

After leading us to the bar-table, the bartender faced Jeanne and said, "Well, if it isn't Bayonetta's little girlfriend and her Umbran apprentices. And, it appears they've brought in a fourth member of the family."

"What the fuck did you say," said the mafia-man, as he faced the four of us and said, "Oh great, just what we need, another member of the anti-angel squad! What I hate more than those invisible thugs working for God, are the folks that fight them."

"Learn to get used to the supernatural, Enzo," Jeanne said to the mafia-man, "as you'll be involved in it a lot."

"Well, excuse me," replied the mafia-man whom Jeanne called by the name, Enzo. "It's just that I've been working my sorry ass off for the past two years to pay a large debt I owe to the bartender, Rodin, that I grew more miserable sober than I am drunk!"

"Don't mind the poor bastard," Rodin said to Jeanne and the three of us. "It's just that he spent two years paying that debt, and he still has a long-way to go. I may be giving him all those second chances, but if he doesn't pay-up soon, he'll be ending up like all those top-ranking mafia-thugs he used to hit in the past, like Eggman the Destroyer, for example."

"Right," said Jeanne.

"Who are you," I asked Rodin.

"Heh heh heh," Rodin chuckled to himself. He would take a puff from his cigar, then continue, "I'm the owner, cook, and bartender of The Gates of Hell. I also act as an information broker, along with my good buddy, Enzo, as well as a blacksmith. I can provide any bit and piece of vital information at an exact and expensive price, or forge the strongest magical weapons for Jeanne and the three of you of her apprentices, provided that you gathered enough gold halos you gather from the angels you'll soon be slaughtering in the near future, for me to forge your new killing-tools." He then said to Jeanne, "So, what kind of weapons will I be forging for your third apprentice? After all, I've forged a flame-sword and incendiary pistols for Grill, and two electric-stunners and shock pistols for Static."

Jeanne would take out a small bag of halos and place it on the table in front of Rodin, and then say to him, "My first two apprentices and I managed to gather the sufficient halos from all the angels we've slaughtered recently, so that you can build us ice-themed weapons for our little ice-princess, Cryo."

Taking the bag of halos, Rodin responded to Jeanne, "Don't you worry, my white-haired princess. Anything you ask for your third apprentice, I'll give to her in a moment's notice!" Rodin then carried the bag of halos to a door and disappeared behind it, as he started the forging process.

Meanwhile, Enzo would face Jeanne and say, "So you're still working to rebuild your long-lost order of witches, huh? If Bayonetta were around, instead of sitting around, twiddling her thumbs at her hut, she'd at least have to develop the balls to help you rebuild those angel-exterminators!"

"You know that Bayonetta woman, like Jeanne," I asked Enzo.

"Hell yeah," Enzo replied. "Two years ago, along with Rodin, I also acted as Bayonetta's info-broker and insurance-provider, giving her the vital clues and funds needed to help her regain her lost memories of the past and give God's invisible thugs a good spankin' in their asses, for a large price, that is. Don't worry, she paid me back for the info and insurance, it's just that she still owes me more of the money I need to pay the debt to Rodin!" Enzo took a puff of his cigar and blew smoke in front of our faces, as he then continued, "You want to know what Bayonetta's doing now, ever since she punched-out a god into the sun?"

"Jeanne told me about her, already," I replied to Enzo, "and you said it yourself: She lives in her hut in the middle of the Vigrid swamps."

"Well," Enzo continued, "there's more to the story than just a witch living in the middle of the swamps. To keep her privacy, she invented and spreaded all across Vigrid, some stupid story about how she eats misbehavin' little tykes to augment her magical powers, much like that other witch from Hansel and Grettel, when she tried to eat the two rugrats herself. Ever since then, the kiddies started to fear her and promised to be good, but that would piss off the parents and other adults of Vigrid, forcing them to form angry mobs to corner Bayonetta at her hut and send her back to the devil that gave her those creepy, anti-angel powers."

"How did she defend herself," I said, "if she's just one woman against a vast angry mob of Vigrid citizens?"

"She'd slaughter them," Jeanne said, "and display their bodies as an example of what happens to those that screw with Bayonetta. She also does likewise to angels whenever they'd invade her home to kill her. Since then, nobody dared to go to visit Bayonetta's hut in the Vigrid swamps, out of fear that she'll kill them, steal their children if they have any, and eat them to augment her magical powers."

"She'd," I said, "kill innocent people to defend herself, and eat little children? How could you say such a thing about her?"

"That's how she's like," Jeanne replied. "I was once the same way as her when I was brainwashed by Father Balder and used against her, always taunting her about her past and even going far as to attempt to kill her in combat. However, when I survived those two rockets that blew-up the building I've fought Bayonetta on, I returned to being the old, compassionate sister-figure to Bayonetta. The differences in our opinions on the restoration of our lost order of the Umbra Witches need no introduction, since I've told you about it already."

"Then," I continued, "why would she save the world and then decide to eat misbehaving children and kill innocent people?"

"She did that to save her own skin," Enzo said to me. "She didn't give two pieces of shit about the world, it's just that if the world went sleeping with the fishes, then she goes with it!"

"However," continued Jeanne, "there was one exception: A young man and journalist by the name of Luka. Even though she never showed it, she cared for Luka and saved his life a couple of times during her quest to regain her missing past. At first, he wanted her dead for the murder of his father, a photographer named Antonio Redgrave, but then realized that it was a group of angels that murdered him, not Bayonetta. She may be a selfish, little bitch, but at least there's some compassion when it comes to that Luka Redgrave-person, as well as her childhood-self Cereza."

"Right," I said. "I should've known that Bayonetta still cared for someone in a world that hated her."

"She also cared for me, you know," Jeanne said, "because she looked-up to me like a sister. By now, though, she's also probably thankful to me for imprisoning her in that coffin for five-hundred years, otherwise Father Balder, Jubileus's right eye, would've use Bayonetta, the left eye, to summon that same beast the two of us managed to destroy together."

"One set of ice-based weapons," said Rodin's voice, as we would then face the bartender, carrying a wooden box.

"That was quick," I said to Rodin.

"I said I'd forge you those weapons," Rodin continued, "and so I did." He then opened the box in front of me, revealing a set of four light-blue pistols and a pair of ice-daggers. "Happy birthday, ice-princess," Rodin said to me.

"I understand the two ice-daggers," I said, "but how come you're giving me four guns when I only have two hands?"

"Here," Jeanne said to me, "let me help you." Jeanne took out the four guns and gave two of them to my hands while strapping the other two on the back of my heels.

"The extra two guns," Rodin said to me, "are meant for your heels. Just fire them from your feet the same way you'd do with your hands, and they work just like any other normally-wielded guns."

"Bayonetta and I used to strap guns on the backs of our heels," Jeanne said, "to allow us to fire from our feet as well as our hands."

"Miss Jeanne taught us how to use guns with our feet rather than just our hands," Grill said to me.

"Surely," Static said, "you'll learn to do the same as well."

"Which doesn't leave how in all nine fucks Jeanne will train the ice-lady," Enzo said.

"You know the answer yourself, Enzo," Jeanne said to him. "You've witnessed it yourself along with Rodin and I, remember?"

Enzo thought to himself for a moment, and a few seconds later, he then continued, "Oh, pardon me. Thanks for the little reminder."

"What are you guys talking about," I asked them.

"The test," Rodin said. "Before Jeanne can train you along with your new sisters, she needs to see your combat-skills for herself."

"Combat-skills," I asked Rodin. "I don't know how to fight! And besides, how am I going to display my so-called 'skills' if there's no one to fight against?"

"Come with me, darling," Jeanne said to me, "and you'll find out for yourself."

I was outside, standing in the middle of the city street, equipped with my pair of ice-daggers, each in my holsters, and four guns, two in my hands and two strapped on the backs of my feet. Jeanne said she was doing this to summon angels from the sky for me to fight them, but I was scared. What if I fail her pre-training test? What were the consequences if the angels kill me? Will I be sent to Hell for practicing witch-craft, just like Jeanne, Grill, and Static?

Jeanne, Grill, Static, Enzo, and Rodin were on top of a building next to the street I was on, watching me from above while waiting for the angels to arrive. "Just what I fucking needed," Enzo said, "another angel-exterminator that serves the devil himself, just like Bayonetta, Jeanne, and the fire-princess and lightning-princess... what were their names again?"

"My name's Grill," Grill said to Enzo.

"I'm called Static," Static also said to Enzo.

"You should learn Jeanne's baby-girls' names by now, you know" Rodin said to Enzo, "just as you should get used to a couple of witches kicking some sorry angel-ass and sending their corpses back to Heaven as an example of what happens when you screw with them."

Jeanne then said to me from above, "Are you prepared? If you want, I can give you last-minute pointers before you serve yourself on a silver-platter to those accursed angels!"

"To be honest," I responded to Jeanne, "yes, I kinda do, because I'm scared after all."

"Remember," Jeanne replied to me, "don't bother acting on intellect, as it can trick you into believing things that would get you killed later on. Instead, act on instinct, and by that time you'll fight like we know you can!"

"But," I said to Jeanne, "I don't know how to act on instinct! What if they lie to me and get me killed, like my intellect as you'd say?"

"Here they come," Rodin said.

As I felt something warm, I turned to face the sky, discovering a large, bright light that was blinding me. "Aw God," cried Enzo, covering his eyes, "again with the fucking lights? They're blinding me like shit-knows-what!"

"Shut up, Enzo," Grill and Static said to Enzo in unison.

"Jeanne's baby-girls are right, you know," Rodin said to Enzo. "You keep moving that pie-hole, and we might as well hand you over to the same angels Cryo's going to kill."

Continuing to look up, as my eyes slowly adjusted to the bright light, I saw a small group of angels descending from the sky. They were literally nothing like the angels I heard stories about, as they more-likely resembled monsters that happened to have wings and halos like regular angels.

"And so," Jeanne said from above, "it begins."

The angels, with their giant, golden spears, flew toward me, getting ready to attack. I screamed in fear, kneeling down on the ground while hoping that they didn't attack me. However, for some reason, the angels didn't attack, and as I stopped screaming and got back up, I saw, to my shock, the angels slowing down in front of me. I had no idea what was going on or why those angels, and everything around me in general, slowed down. But, my survival came first, as I aimed one of my two pistols at the angels and fired several shots into their heads, freezing them in ice. The time around me would hasten back to normal, as I saw the frozen angels fall to the ground and shatter into pieces.

Shocked and confused, I faced Jeanne and asked her, "Did I just do that? You know, slow down time long enough for me to shoot them?"

"Of course," replied Jeanne. "It's called Witch Time, one of the most common abilities used by the Umbran Witches. But, I suggest you continue fighting the angels, as there are more of them already."

"What," I asked, as I then faced forward again and discovered more spear-wielding angels that wanted to kill me. With no other choice but to defend myself, I used Witch Time again to slow time around me before they could strike, giving me enough ample time to fire more ice-bullets from my two guns, straight into their faces. Occasionally, I'd use ice-themed torture attacks, like impaling them through icy-spikes and the like, as well as summon ice-monsters made out of my own blue-hair for the larger angels.

However, the fight went-on, as more angels appeared from the sky to eliminate me. As I fought, Jeanne said to the others, "Cryo maybe a force on her own, but let's see how she can handle those angels in a team!" She'd then say to Grill and Static, "Girls?"

"Yes, Miss Jeanne," said Grill and Static, as they jumped-down the building and joined me in the fight.

As the three of us were surrounded by angels, I asked Grill and Static, "What are you doing here? Isn't this supposed to be my test?"

"Miss Jeanne wanted to see how well you do in a small team," Static replied.

"So," Grill said, "I suggest you work-together with us to destroy those angels, unless you want those guys to drag your butt to Hell!"

And just like that, in a matter of two hours, the three of us, as a team, killed every last angel with my ice-powers, Grill's fire-powers, and Static's lightning-powers. The ground around the three of us was littered with angel corpses, each dropping rings that were probably needed for Rodin to build more weapons for us.

As Jeanne, Rodin, and Enzo jumped down the building, landed on their feet, and walked toward us, Jeanne then said to us, "You see, Cryo? Slaughtering hordes of angels wasn't so bad, especially when you have your sisters to assist you."

"I..." I said, shocked by my own abilities, "I don't know what to say. I've fought... as if I'm some magic kung-fu master from those cheesy martial-arts movies! How come you never told me about how well I can fight?"

"Telling you would mean nothing," Jeanne replied, "without providing evidence. I needed to test you, both alone and in a team, to see how well you can defend yourself from the angels. If I were to grade your performance, I'd give you... a C."

"Cryo did something sloppy," Grill said to Jeanne, "right?"

"Well, of course," Rodin replied. "Even with my cryo-pistols and ice-daggers, she still need to grease her wheels before she can fight more powerful angels."

"This is why I'm here," Jeanne continued. "As your mother-figure, I will do everything in my power to make you and your new sisters surpass even me, even if it makes you join those angels you've killed."

"Just make sure you don't do any damage to my ultimate creations while you're at it," Rodin said to the three of us, "or things will get ugly."

"Yes, Rodin," Grill, Static, and I replied.

"Now," Rodin said to Jeanne, "if you need Enzo and I, you know where to find us."

"The Gates of Hell," Jeanne replied, "you don't have to remind me."

"Good," Rodin said, as he then faced Enzo and said, "Come on, Enzo, you still have a large debt to pay!"

"Aw, come-on," Enzo replied. "Can it wait? I had enough Hell when I saw those three apprentices turn invisible to fight those holy-monsters!"

"Ahem," Rodin replied.

"Right," Enzo said, "I apologize."

Rodin and Enzo then walked down the streets of Vigrid, back to the Gates of Hell bar. Meanwhile, Jeanne said to the three of us, "Come on to my castle, now, girls. You wouldn't want to keep your Umbran mother waiting."

"Yes, Miss Jeanne," the three of us replied, as Grill, Static, and I walked down the city streets, back to Jeanne's castle.