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Chapter Five
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Harry let all thought fade from his conscious mind as he flowed through the kata routine, letting even the presence of both Hermione and Neville fade into the background of his awareness. It hadn't taken him long to discover that the katas, once he could do them easily, were almost as good as meditating - and they had the added benefit of exercising his body at the same time. All things considered, he would grab hold of just about anything that allowed him to do more than one of his many activities at once. He was spending more time in the ROR than he was in the Gryffindor common room, and beginning to feel like he was drowning in things he needed to get done. There simply wasn't enough time in the day.
He'd long since converted the DA into a far more mutual study group than it had been the year before. Each week someone different was in charge of introducing spells and other ideas that they all practiced or learned together. He, Hermione, and Ron still took lead of the DA once a month, but that was still far less work than last year. It certainly made it far easier on him - and everyone else, for that matter - and did even more for the confidence of everyone involved. He'd broached the idea of introducing family politics into the group, but had been voted down. Hermione had, quite rightly, pointed out that too many of the people involved in the DA were younger siblings and wouldn't need to ever know the stuff.
Ron had agreed with Hermione; though, not for her reasons. He simply found the whole subject boring, something Harry had figured out back when he'd asked him about teaching it to him.
He sighed as he finished his second kata and moved smoothly into his third. Neville hadn't been much more help; though, he did know a lot more than Ron did.
"I'll tell you what I can, Harry, but Gran hasn't been real big on teaching me about it," Neville replied quietly, the shrugged, smiling sadly. "I don't think she thinks I can handle it." "I know you could, Neville," Harry replied just as quietly. "Thanks." "So who do you think could teach this stuff to me?" "All the older pureblood families know this stuff. It's handed down from father to oldest son, generation after generation," Neville told him. "I'm sure some of the kids from mixed blood families - especially if it's the father that's from a wizarding background - would be able to. It'll just be a case of finding one of them that has the time and you trust well enough." Neville snorted then, shaking his head. "If he wasn't such an obnoxious prat, I'd say Malfoy'd be the one to ask. He's sure to know the ins and outs of it, blindfolded, deaf and dumb." Harry laughed in response, knowing damn well that his friend was probably right, which made it a no brainer. He'd ask Malfoy. Of course, he'd find someone else to go over it too. He trusted Malfoy to look out for his own best interests, and those didn't necessarily coincide with Harry's. He supposed the oath would take care of at least some of that, but still didn't think Malfoy would be completely forthcoming about all the rights and responsibilities Harry had as head of line - at least those 'within the family'.
Letting himself come to a rest at the end of his third kata, he allowed awareness of the others to seep forward, and noticed that they too were just finishing up. He grinned and jumped to his feet. "So, anyone up for some throws?" he asked, smirking.
x-x-x
Harry strode down the hallway, his mood good despite the bruises he'd developed from their practice session. It didn't seem to matter how often he practiced falling, he ended up landing wrong at least once or twice each time they worked out together. Next on his list of things to do was meet Malfoy. They met twice a week in one of the unused dungeon rooms in order for Harry to learn more about - as Malfoy sneeringly put it - everything he should have learned before he even came to Hogwarts. One night was devoted to family and wizarding laws and traditions, and one night was devoted to a little bit of everything - including very remedial potions.
He made it to the ground floor before he was stopped.
"Mr. Potter."
He sighed; though he tried to hide the reaction. "Yes, Professor?" he asked, turning around to face Professor McGonagall.
"The headmaster would like to see you in his office in one hour."
Harry resisted the urge to roll his eyes, knowing full well it wouldn't go over well with his head of house. "Yes, Ma'am," he replied evenly.
"The password for today is Candy Corn."
"Thank you, Professor," Harry replied. "I'll be there," he continued, then darted off before the Professor could say anything else. He had to hurry if he wanted to spend much of any time with Malfoy today.
He couldn't help wondering just what the headmaster wanted to talk about; though he had his suspicions. This was the first time the headmaster had called him for a private meeting since the beginning of the year, and Harry was sure he wanted to talk about the so-called 'anger management' sessions he was supposed to be taking with Professor Snape. Maybe, if things went well, he'd once again broach the touchy subjects he'd tried to raise with the headmaster over the summer. He really would like an answer to some of them.
Harry slowed his pace as he tried to figure out exactly what he was going to tell the headmaster if that was what the old man wanted to talk about. Not the truth, for sure, Harry thought sourly. He really didn't think that would go over very well, and certainly wouldn't be conducive to calmly talking through their other issues. By the time he had puzzled out just how he was going to respond if he was right, he had reached the classroom he and Malfoy used. That issue settled to his momentary satisfaction, he pushed the topic to the back of his mind and - after making sure no one else was around to see him - slipped inside, shutting the door behind him.
"How many seats are on the wizarding council and who traditionally fill those seats?" Malfoy asked the moment the door was shut.
Harry blinked in surprise; though, he supposed he should have been expecting it by now. Malfoy did the same thing almost every time they got together. In the weeks following his asking Malfoy to teach him, most of the time had been spent on history and laws. They had yet to even touch on head of line rights and responsibilities specifically, concentrating more on the duties of being titled - of course, according to Draco, some of those things overlapped, but some didn't.
"There are 50 seats and they are filled by the oldest of the wizarding families," Harry replied instantly, despite his preoccupied thoughts, quickly following that up by listing the families that each seat was assigned to - including the 15 founding families of the area. "Not all of the seats are filled anymore," he continued, "with several of the families having died out." Knowing exactly what Malfoy wanted - the prat was almost as hard a taskmaster as Snape - he then listed all the vacant seats and why they were vacant - beyond the fact that there was no one to fill them.
He'd protested memorizing that information only once, and been told in no uncertain terms that he'd be expected to know it if he intended to take his own seats after graduation. No one would take him seriously otherwise. And there was no way that he was going to let Harry humiliate them both by trying to take up his titles and roles without knowing exactly what he needed to know.
"For today-"
Harry held up a hand, interrupting the Slytherin. "I'm sorry, Malfoy, but today we're going to have to cut this session short."
Malfoy narrowed his eyes at him. "I thought you were serious about learning this, Potter?" he asked, only a faint sneer in his tone. "I'm not going to waste my time if you're not."
"I am serious about it, Malfoy," Harry growled, resenting the 'Snape Jr.' attitude, "but the headmaster wants to see me in his office today. I can stay about 15 more minutes before I have to take off to meet him."
Malfoy nodded sharply. "Very well, we'd best get started then."
x-x-x
Harry let out a sigh of relief as the door closed behind him, newly learned laws, regulations, stipulations and dates of enactment cluttering his mind. Apparently, Malfoy thought not enough time meant speak twice as fast as usual. Of course, the prat would probably still expect him to be able to answer questions about today's lecture the next time they met. Unfortunately, Harry really didn't think he was going to remember most of this by the next time. He sighed, shaking his head. He really should start remembering to bring parchment and quills with him, because, right now, everything was all a big jumbled mess in his mind.
Slowing as he neared the gargoyle, Harry centered himself, carefully binding away the many issues he still had with the headmaster, utilizing the mindclearing techniques he'd mastered for occlumency. They helped. Still, a part of him wanted to revisit the issue of the anger management sessions, requesting they be ended, not because he wanted the meetings to end - because he didn't, they were handy for sneaking behind the headmaster's back - but just to find out whether the man would actually listen to him this time.
No, he told himself firmly, shaking his head. Concentrate on more important matters! He also really wished he knew what Professor Snape had passed on to the headmaster about their time together - if anything. He should have asked the professor a long time ago. He knew the subject would be raised, regardless of whether it was actually the reason for today's private visit.
Pausing as he reached the guarded entrance, he took a couple slow, deep breaths before giving the password. "Candy corn."
The guardian slid to the side, revealing the hidden stairwell and Harry confidently stepped onto the top stair. He concentrated on trying to relax as he rode the stairs up. It wasn't as easy as he would have liked. Everything he was feeling about the man was all mixed up inside him and it was difficult to sort it all out. All too soon he arrived at the door, but before he could even knock, it opened onto the headmaster's office.
"Come in, Harry."
Harry smiled as he walked in and dropped into the chair in front of the headmaster's desk. "Good afternoon, Headmaster," he said.
"Lemon drop?"
"No thank you."
The headmaster nodded, smiling and replacing the bowl of yellow candies back on his desk. "So, how has your term gone so far?"
Harry shrugged, not really interested in small talk. He would rather get to the point of the visit, so he could get back to the rest of his day. "Fine," he replied shortly. "You needed to see me about something, Sir?"
"Ah, straight to the point then, is it?" the headmaster asked.
Harry nodded. "I have a lot of homework I need to get to, Sir."
If he didn't simply want to be gone, Harry might have found the energy to be insulted by the surprised look that briefly flared across the headmaster's expression; instead, he simply chose to ignore it.
"Very well then, Harry," the headmaster agreed readily, leaning forward intently before continuing. "I wanted to talk to you about your upcoming holiday activities."
Confused, Harry frowned. "What about them, Sir?" he asked. He'd assumed he be staying at the school - as usual - or heading to Grimmauld place. Sheer dread suddenly coursed through him. Had they found the Dursleys? Was he going to send Harry back to them for winter break, since he hadn't stayed with them over the summer? Hadn't the wards fallen for good? Before he could voice any of his fears, however, he realized the headmaster was still speaking and he'd missed part of what the old man had been saying.
"-so, at first you'll continue with your anger therapy and begin slowly with occlumency."
Harry fought the instant outrage that tried to overwhelm him. The headmaster hadn't even asked how the classes were going before assuming he still needed to go! And over winter break! He shoved it all down, having learned that it did no good to protest the headmaster's 'decrees'. He almost snorted at the thought. He'd had better luck thwarting Umbridges so-called 'educational decrees'.
Be an adult, Harry! he scolded himself. "Very well, Headmaster," he replied firmly. "I would be willing to set aside two one hour sessions a week during my break, one for 'anger therapy and one for occlumency."
The headmaster immediately shook his head. "I'm afraid that won't be quite enough, my boy. Since there will be no other classes you need to attend, I'll expect you to spend three one hour sessions a week on anger therapy with Professor Snape, as well as spending two hours, three times the first week, in occlumency lessons . . . to get you back into the swing of studying it. For the remaining two and half weeks of break, you'll be spending three hours a day mastering occlumency, as well as continuing the anger therapy. You'll, of course, have one day each week to do with as you please."
Harry frowned, listening to the headmaster drone on about how he would be spending the majority of his break from school. You'll have one day a week to do with as you please, he repeated snidely inside his head - his occlumency barriers up full - though, he made sure not to look the headmaster in directly in the eyes anyway. Didn't want to give the game away after all. He should, though, he knew. If the headmaster knew how good he was already getting at occlumency, he'd back off. Wouldn't he?
Yeah, like he backed off with the temper issue?
Harry's frown deepened. "Sir, I thought you should know," he tried, "I'm already getting pretty good at occlumency."
"I'm sure you are Harry," the headmaster agreed smiling, looking delighted. "As I'm sure you're aware, however, Voldemort is very powerful, and we need to make sure he can no longer get into your mind."
"Yes, Sir. I agree with that, Sir, but-"
"No buts, Harry. You need to do this."
Told you he wouldn't listen!
"Have you told Professor Snape yet?" he asked snidely, unable - at last - to keep all of his resentment out of his voice.
Dumbledore frowned at him, looking disappointed. "Professor Snape will be available, Harry, never fear."
I'll take that as a 'no', Harry sneered silently.
"He will do his job."
Job!
"It's his 'job' to use up his vacation time teaching?" he asked in disbelief.
"Harry," Dumbledore admonished lightly, "I can't believe you're being recalcitrant about this. You've already admitted to the need."
"I'M NOT-" Harry shouted, jumping up from his seat before he forcibly cut himself off. "I'm not being recalc-whatever, Headmaster," Harry began again, this time as calmly as he could. "I am already working on occlumency, and I'm willing to do more, I just don't see the need to take up so much of my and Professor Snape's break to do it."
"Harry, in time you will understand," told him, once again smiling. "For now, just trust that I know what I'm doing."
"And what about you trusting that I might actually know what I'm doing, Headmaster?" he asked tightly, trying not to lose his temper, but unable to keep all of it out of his voice. "I need this break," he admitted finally, not wanting to admit to weakness of any kind, but knowing it might be the only chance to get the headmaster to back off.
The headmaster's expression softened. "I know you've been working hard this year, Harry, what with the DA, your lessons, and anger management, and I assure you these lessons will only take up a small portion of your time. It will still be a break for you."
Harry's jaw dropped at the casual dismissal of his plea and he almost told the headmaster that what the man had mentioned was only the tip of the iceburg - so to speak - but something held him back. Something inside him didn't want to test the theory that even if the older wizard knew everything he'd been doing he still wouldn't listen. It was summer breaks revisited and he was very much afraid that it wouldn't matter to the man.
"I'm sorry, Sir, but I can't agree with you on this."
"Be that as it may, Harry, I must insist. You will have your first session with Professor Snape two days after you're settled at Grimmauld Place."
Harry remained silent. He wasn't going to beg. It wouldn't do any good. He, however, wasn't going to simply take this, either. He just had to figure out just what he was going to do about it.
"You do understand, Harry, right?"
"Yes, Sir," Harry replied tightly, "I understand."
I understand, alright, Old Man, he thought bitterly, nothing but your opinion matters.
"Very well then, Harry. I'm glad you understand. I know that what I ask of you isn't always easy, but I also know that you can handle it. You are a very remarkable young man."
x-x-x
Albus sadly watched the young Gryffindor he was so proud of stride out of his office. He didn't know where the sudden resentment Harry had developed toward him this year stemmed from, but it all but broke his heart. He supposed it didn't help when he had to keep pushing the boy so hard. He did have to smile a little, however. Despite the rather amazing amount of power at the young man's command - and the anger he'd briefly displayed - Albus' office was just as it was when Harry had arrived. Not a single item had been broken, or even ruffled for that matter. Albus couldn't begin to express - to himself or anyone else - just how proud that made him.
He sighed, wishing he truly could back off and let Harry have his own lead. Unfortunately, he did not believe he had that option at all. Time was running out, of that he was absolutely certain. The feeling that had begun deep inside him before the term began, had not lessened in the slightest. It had only grown. The two of them had to develop some level of trust between them, and they had to do it soon.
"Oh, my boy, if anyone can tame Severus' demons, it's you. Just, please, do it soon," Albus pled. Moments later, he shook himself and returned his attention to the piles of work on his desk. He had to leave his two favorite boys to their own devices. Either they would mend fences, or they would not. He was already doing all he could to help them along.
x-x-x
Harry berated himself all the way back to Gryffindor tower. He hadn't broached a single one of the topics he'd really wanted to. He'd wanted out of the headmaster's presence too badly to do anything calmly. It did make him wonder, for just a moment, whether or not he really did need more help with his temper. If he couldn't even remain calm when-
No, he told himself firmly. Anyone would be angry at what he's pulling! The important thing was, he hadn't lost control; of his temper or of his magic.
Forcibly calming himself, Harry started planning. He had a lot to get done, if his break was going to actually be productive. He'd thought he'd be staying at Hogwarts, where it would be easy to practice his spells, both wandless and not. Now that was taken away, he was going to have to figure something else out. Of course, being away from Hogwarts, it might make it easier to get to Gringotts and see if Malfoy was right about there probably being family books stored in his vault. The last time he'd visited his vault, he'd noticed several books, but hadn't really paid much attention to them. Of course, he hadn't exactly been interested in books at the time. He'd been more interested in getting the galleons he needed. He had noticed the parchment detailing the property he'd been planning on heading to the moment he turned 17. At the time, he pretty much hadn't even cared what kind of condition it was in. All that had mattered was that it belonged to him. He could certainly handle 'roughing it' for a month - especially since it would be summer anyway.
By the time he reached the Fat Lady's portrait, he was sure he had a reasonable plan. Now, he just needed to talk to the one person who could help him carry it out . . . assuming the wizard would actually be willing. Of course, Remus would be a good choice to help with some of it, but as much as the man was a friend, he doubted Remus would be willing to trust his judgement enough to help with the things that required he leave the safety of Grimmauld Place. Harry snorted as he said the password, nodding abruptly to the portrait. Not that Snape trusts my judgement either!
Bursting into the Gryffindor common room, and striding toward the boys' dorm at full speed, Harry ignored any of his friends that called after him. Slamming the door behind him, he launched himself at his trunk and hurriedly dug out his invisibility cloak. He had to see Professor Snape, and definitely didn't want the headmaster to know. If the professor actually had some forewarning of what the headmaster had planned, maybe they could . . . counteract it somehow. The least he could do was not allow the older wizard to get blindsided with the information that his break was going to be ruined.
"Harry!" Ron exclaimed bursting into the dorm. "What's wro-" Ron broke off, obviously not seeing him anywhere.
Thankfully, Ron had left the door open and Harry easily slipped out of the room without his friend being any the wiser.
"I know you're under that bloody cloak of yours, Harry," Ron accused as Harry started down the stairs.
You're talking to an empty room, Ron. Harry stifled a laugh as he shook his head, hurrying down the stairs and through the common room as quickly as stealth would allow. He knew he should have taken the time to talk to Ron first, but didn't want to take the chance that Dumbledore would get to Professor Snape first. That would make everything worse if they couldn't get out of it.
x-x-x
Severus scowled at the door through which the menace of his life had just exited. Even he had to admit that it wasn't Potter's fault this time, but that didn't change the fact that this latest disaster centered around the boy. He'd had plans for this winter break, and he sincerely hoped that the brat had simply misunderstood Albus. He was somewhat, okay very, shocked that the boy had come to him at all. It showed signs that the brat might actually care about the plans of someone other than himself. He sighed and turned toward his private quarters. There was nothing he could do about it right now, not unless he wished to give away the fact that Potter had come straight to him after he'd found out. That was something he was particularly loathe to do, for a variety of reasons, not the least of which being his doubt about the boy's understanding.
Of course, the fact that he would be giving up a decided advantage if he let that slip didn't play any part whatsoever in his decision. If the boy was right, Severus would be able to walk into the meeting with Albus prepared ahead of time - something that didn't happen very often. Perhaps it would allow him to finagle his way out of his winter break being completely taken up.
If you'd just tell the man about Potter's slowly growing success with occlumency, he wouldn't be requiring this in the first place! he scolded himself. He still didn't want to do that, however, something deep inside telling him it was better this way. That bothered him, however. He'd trusted Albus for a long time, that doubt was beginning to creep in around the edges of his trust was . . . unsettling.
"I'll deal with it when the time comes," he muttered as he crossed from his office into his sitting room, deciding then and there, to pay much closer attention to both the brat and to Albus. He snorted - as difficult as that would be, considering the amount of his attention the two of them already held. For now, he had papers to grade, and solitude to seek. The future would simply have to take care of itself.
End of Shifting Loyalties - Episode Four of Going Grey
Kiristeen ke Alaya
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Coming soon: "It's All About Perspective" Episode Five of Going Grey