DISCLAIMER:: these characters are not mine

A/N:: thought this up while i was going for my daily run. it was either that or focus on how unbearably hot california is...all year.

-/-

"Jane, I'm home." Maura closed the front door pulling her keys out of the lock.

"Finally! I thought you'd never get home." Jane rushed out of the great room and into Maura's arms.

Maura felt herself relax. It had been a stressful day and it felt good to come home to something familiar. Jane had been with her since the shooting on the steps in front of headquarters exactly one year ago. It seemed like yesterday to Maura and she hated being reminded of it, but tonight Frankie had insisted on coming over to observe the anniversary. She had reluctantly agreed, more for his sake than her own or Jane's.

"You do know what today is." Jane brushed a strand of hair from Maura's eyes.

Maura tensed again. "Of course I know." She pushed past Jane and into the kitchen. "Frankie's coming over," she called over her shoulder.

"Poor Frankie. That day was hard on him."

"Yep, nothing like getting shot to ruin your day."

"Why Dr. Isles, is that sarcasm I detect in your voice?" Jane perched on the counter next to the sink, where Maura was clutched the edge so hard her knuckles were white.

Maura managed a half smile. "I learned from the best."

It only took a few seconds for the smile to break and the tears to come.

Jane frowned and pulled Maura into her arms. Maura buried her head into Jane's chest and let the sobs rack through her body without holding back. "Hey, Maura, it's okay, you're fine."

Maura continued to cry for several minutes before she responded. "I'm not fine. I miss you."

Jane kissed the top of the blonde woman's head. "I'm right here."

Maura pulled away slightly so she could look up into Jane's brown eyes. "It's not the same. I miss you when I go to work."

Jane nodded and looked away. She hadn't been back to work since that day, not once. She was no longer a Boston homicide detective and she no longer was a colleague of Maura's. Instead she spent her days here, with Maura, when the medical examiner wasn't at work of course.

They had been a couple since then, any insecurities about their attractions to one another had gone away with the shooting. When your life hangs in the balance it can be a great motivator to go after the things you normally wouldn't have; it teaches you to throw caution to the wind. And they had ever since.

Maura spent the next couple minutes in Jane's arms. Finally her crying subsided and she set about getting prepared for Frankie's arrival.

"Are Frost and Korsak coming too?"

Maura frowned at the question. She hadn't thought to ask. "I'm sure Frost will show, but Korsak took that day harder than almost all of us. You know how protective he was when it came to you. First Hoyt and then Marino. He feels like he let too many people get to you, he feels responsible for everything that happened that day."

Jane frowned. That was just like her old partner. "It wasn't his fault. He couldn't have known Bobby was dirty. He told me Danny was. I spent hours with him and I never once doubted that he was on our side."

"It wasn't your fault either Jane. I'm not having this conversation with you too."

Jane opened her mouth to say something but Maura raised a hand and gave her a warning look, causing the words to die in Jane's throat. She knew not to press the issue with Maura, who more than anyone else, just wanted to forget that day.

"I'm sorry."

"Let's just drop it, okay?"

Jane knew she should point out that tonight was all about that day, but she held her tongue.

Maura walked around in stony silence. She had stacked the fridge with beer; she knew the men didn't drink wine, but she still got out two bottles. She had a feeling there would be a lot of drinking going on tonight.

"Maura." When Jane got no response from the blonde, she tried again. "Maura, look at me, please."

Maura set the bottles down on the table. Finally she turned around, her eyes downcast. It took her a couple moments and a few shaky breaths, but she finally looked up.

Jane smiled. "Come here." She slid off the counter and held her arms open to the medical examiner. It took Maura a moment, but she finally crossed the room and slid into the brunette's arms. Jane leaned down and their lips met. The kiss lingered for several long moments. When they pulled apart Jane rested her forehead against Maura's. "We will get through this night. You can get through this night."

As if on cue, there was a knock at the door and it opened. Maura pulled herself from Jane's arms and smoothed her skirt. Frankie entered.

"Hey Frankie." Jane smiled sadly at her little brother.

Frankie nodded in the women's direction. "Hey."

Maura stepped forward and gave him a hug. He squeezed her lightly for a moment and then pulled away, standing awkwardly now that the greeting was over.

"Frost and Korsak are coming. They just had some paperwork to finish up on the Sorelli case."

Maura nodded. "I bought plenty of beer. You want one?"

Frankie, looking slightly relieved, nodded.

She crossed to the fridge and pulled out two, handing one to him. He popped the top off his bottle and she popped the top off the other.

Frankie frowned and held his bottle up. "A toast. To Jane. You are missed."

Maura glanced over her shoulder to where Jane smiled at them sadly. She looked back at Frankie. "To Jane. To a life taken too early. To a lost colleague, a lost sister… a lost love." Maura clinked her bottle against Frankie's and they each downed nearly half their bottles. I miss you Jane.