Well here it is, sorry for the wait. My lovely beta ILive4Irony417 had prom and life in general. I also have been a little wacky.

There is more ED stuff in here and probably will be from now on.

Thanks to my readers and reviewers! You all rock! Thanks ILive4Irony417 for being awesome!

I still don't own degrassi

Adam

I called Eli and told him about the note from Clare. He seemed a little amused by it, which really was to be expected. I told him that I had the house to myself when I invited him over. He seemed to like the thought of that. I actually wasn't feeling too weird about it, sure some of the weirdness left over from my dream was there, but that binge and purge really did the trick. I felt wonderfully empty. Not just of food, but worry, anxiety and sadness. Its times like these that I wonder why I ever stopped. Ok so there was that time that I almost died, but I won't let it get that bad this time. Any way the point is, I feel good for once so I'm just gonna go with it.

I decided to bake some cookies while I was waiting for Eli to show up. I felt so powerful sitting in the kitchen, smelling the cookies baking and knowing that I was gonna resist them. There was a knock at the door just as I was putting the last dozen in the oven. "Coming!" I called as I closed the oven door. I practically ran out of the kitchen to get the door. I big smile spread across my face as I opened it to see my boyfriend standing there.

"Hey you," he said as he stepped up to plant a kiss on my mouth.

"Hey," I said back while moving so he could walk inside.

We headed straight for the living room where we sat on the couch. I pulled the note out of my back pocket and handed it to him. He set it on the coffee table and pulled me to him.

"Not yet, I want some just me and you time before opening that." He shot the note an offending look.

"I can deal with that," I smiled at him before brushing my lips against his.

Eli

As he kissed his boyfriend, Eli distantly thought about the note that he knew he had to read. Sure Clare isn't as fond of drama as her friend Ali, but he was still a little worried about the contents of the letter. Things were just starting to go really well with him and Adam, the last thing he needed was ex drama. He sighed into his boyfriend's mouth before pulling away. He took a deep breath and reached down to retrieve the note from the coffee table. Adam was watching him, an unreadable look on his face. Eli briefly laughed at himself for being so silly about a stupid letter. So he opened it and started reading.

Eli,

I just wanted to write you to let you know some things since we haven't really been talking so much. First I want you to know that I do care about you and some part of me does feel bad about us breaking up, but ultimately I feel like it was the best decision. I really did want to believe that we could work despite our differences, sadly that wasn't true. I do feel like I have learned a lot from you and hope that we can regain some kind of friendship. Because even though I don't think we work as a couple, I do care about you and want you in my life.

Although it is a little strange, I am very happy for you and Adam. He is a great guy and after some thought I have come to the conclusion that you two are better matched than you and I. I hope I am right, because you are two of my closest friends and I want to see you both happy. I hope that we can continue to be friends; I am leaving it up to you to get a hold of me whenever you're ready.

-Clare

He finished reading and looked up at his boyfriend.

"So… how was it?"

He smiled, "Not bad, she just wants to make sure we stay friends and gives us her blessing." He chuckled.

"What? Her blessing, did she actually say that?"

"No, but that's what it came across as, you wanna read it?"

"Sure."

Eli passed the note over and waited while Adam read it. As he read, Eli thought about how strange all this is. He was with Clare, always had a thing for Adam, who is his and Clare's friend. Then he and Clare break up, Adam and he get together and Clare writes him a note giving them the go ahead. Wow, it's like his life is a teen drama on TV or something. But hey, he got the guy which is awesome. Just then Adam looked up.

"Well, that's cool I guess. She had told me that she was cool with us being together, but I wasn't really sure. Seems like she meant it."

"Yeah, enough about her, I'm here to hang with my boyfriend." He gave Adam his sexiest smile.

"Yeah, so what do you want to do?"

He didn't answer, he just intensified his look.

Adam smacked him on his shoulder. "Stop you," he said as he smiled at Eli. "Seriously, what do you wanna do?"

"I don't know we could watch a movie, or… I'm a little hungry. Wanna get something to eat?"

"No, I had a big breakfast. But if you're hungry then you should eat."

"Cool, The Dot?" Adam nodded. "Alright, then we can go to the comic store after, I think the latest Walking Dead just came out."

"That sounds great," he said as he stood. "Let's go."

They got themselves together and headed out the door. After Eli was full of food and Adam was full of coffee, they headed to the comic store. They decided to walk since the store is just five blocks away from The Dot. As they walked, sharing a comfortable silence, Eli found himself lost in thought.

He wasn't sure, but something seemed off about his boyfriend. Yes things have been going good, but they have known each other for much longer than they have been going out. There has been some kind of a shift in him. His appetite seems different; he didn't even try to steal one of his fries today. That's weird. He also seems like he is often preoccupied with his thoughts. Sure things have been a bit crazy, what with him realizing that he likes guys, starting to date one and the sexual issues that have been coming up. Anyone would be in their head a lot. Still, he couldn't help but notice and was slightly worried that something bigger than thinking too much was going on. He hadn't noticed any burns or anything, so he was pretty sure that he wasn't self harming again, but still he had this nagging feeling that something was off. The question for him is, should he bring it up or leave it alone?

On one hand, it may be something that Adam would benefit from talking about. Then again, bringing it up could backfire too. He better not bring it up, at least not just yet. Adam will probably end up talking to him about it if there really is something up. Yeah, he should just wait for him to bring it up. If he doesn't in the next week or so and things seem worse, then he will ask.

He was so lost in his thoughts that he didn't really notice where they were until he was pushing open the door to the shop. They entered and Eli reveled in the smell and atmosphere countless comics provide. He headed right to the latest Walking Dead. He picked it up and flipped through it before searching the store for Adam. He found him amongst the Vertigo comics, looking at some Fables trades.

"Hey you," he breathed into his ear once he was close enough. Adam shivered in response before turning to find himself nose to nose with Eli.

"Hi," he whispered back.

Eli felt his heart start to beat out of control, then somehow regained his brain and stepped back. They were in public after all. They just stood there for a few seconds, looking at each other until Eli spoke.

"So… you ever read those?"

"No, I want to though."

"You should, they're good." Eli took a deep breath that he hoped wasn't too obvious. This was weird; he usually wouldn't feel so weird about being couple-y in public. Thing is, he knows how hard the whole gay (or bi or whatever) thing is for Adam, coming to terms with it at least. So he doesn't want to freak him out or do something wrong.

They looked at comics and nerdy paraphernalia for a while before leaving with various books and things. They decided to spend some time at the park. They found a fairly secluded spot where they could sit close and not be bothered. They actually were sitting under a huge willow tree. The branches hid them from view, which was nice. It was mid-afternoon and they ended up just sitting and talking for hours. As they talked, they shifted a few times until they end up leaning against the trunk, holding hands. While they talked Eli noticed that there seemed to be subtle changes in Adam. His skin looked a little paler and he had slight shadows under his eyes.

"Did you stay up late last night?" he asked.

"What? Why do you ask?"

"You just look like maybe you didn't sleep well last night."

Adam smiled, "Yeah, my sleep was… restless. Crazy dreams."

"Oh? What about?"

"Oh, no, sorry but I'm keeping that to myself."

"Ah, so I had a starring role eh?"

"What makes you think that?"

"Cause you're blushing," he said as he grinned at the other boy.

Adam blushed harder and hid his face behind his hands.

Eli chuckled. "Adam, there's nothing to be shy about. We obviously both want… it. Hey I had plenty dreams starring you last night."

He blushed even harder, turning red from his shirt collar all the way up to his forehead.

"Really?"

Eli turned Adam's head so that their lips were practically touching. "Yes," he whispered, and then they were kissing.

Adam

I was having such a great day that I had almost forgotten this morning. That is until Eli mentioned me looking tired, then the dream came up. That even ended up better than I could have ever expected. Eli has sex dreams about me too and he didn't push to know more. So overall I was feeling great when Eli took me home much later. We had spent forever, it seemed, under that tree. It was nice to be somewhere outside where we didn't have to worry about touching and kissing and what might happen if someone saw. I was quickly realizing that I had never liked someone as much as I like Eli. As he pulled up outside of my house I was feeling like everything was finally going my way.

I turned toward my boyfriend. "Do you wanna come in for a while?"

He grinned at me, "Yes, of course I do."

We got out of Morty and headed up into my house. As we walked through the living room we saw Drew and my step dad sitting in the living room watching TV.

"Hey boys," my dad greeted, "what are you two up to?"

"Not much," I answered. "Where's mom?"

"She went over to Susan's for some kind of girls' night. She should be home in the next hour or so."

I nodded, and then turned to Eli. "You hungry?" He nodded, then we turned toward the kitchen. I realized that I hadn't eaten anything since my binge and that didn't stay in. So I decided I better eat something. I had been a little stupid cause I had been with Eli all day and not eaten once. I'm lucky he didn't notice.

After a while of searching, we decided to have some leftover chicken, rice and vegetables. I filled my plate with mostly chicken and veggies and hoped that it didn't seem weird to Eli. I also made sure to chug a glass of water before eating. We sat at the table while we ate, talking about the stuff we got at the comic shop. When we had exhausted that topic we moved on to movies we wanted to see, then books we were excited to read. After he had finished the food on his plate and I had eaten most of mine, leaving all but a bite or two of rice, we headed up to my room. Once we were safely behind the closed door, the kissing started. After a while we heard my mom come home so we decided to watch a movie on my laptop. Eli picked out Requiem For A Dream.

He turned to me, the movie in his hand. "Man, I've wanted to see this for a while. Have you read the book?"

"Yeah, that's why I got the movie. The book is way freakier."

"Don't say anything more. I haven't read it; I've had it on hold at the library forever."

I got up, crossed over to my bookshelf and pulled it from its place. "Here," I said as I tossed it to him, "borrow mine."

He crossed over to me, wrapping me in his arms. "You're the best," he whispered before kissing me again.

Just then we heard a sound outside my door. We moved apart just in time to avoid any awkward situations with my mom who we could now see standing in my doorway.

"Hello you two," she smiled at us.

"Hello Mrs. Torres," Eli responded and my mom gave him a warm smile.

"Hey mom, did you have fun at Susan's?"

"Yes, thanks for asking. What are you two up to?"

"Not much, we're about to watch a movie."

"Oh, that's good. But it is getting late."

"I know mom, don't worry, Eli will go as soon as the movie is over."

"No rush," she smiled that smile that clearly said to me that she was just being polite but she really did want him to leave after the movie. She stood there a little longer before leaving and telling us to have fun.

I thought about locking the door but decided that if she came back that we could just move apart and that if the door was locked that that would be more suspicious. We cuddled as we watched the rather disturbing movie. When it was over, Eli was even more excited to read the book. We talked for a little while about the book and some others that were maid into movies and how well the movies were made. After a while we knew that he had to go so I walked him downstairs. I so didn't want him to go, so I walked him outside where we talked for a few minutes more.

After we had talked for a while Eli turned toward me and stepped up, pressing his body against mine. "G'night baby," he breathed against my ear.

"Goodnight," I whispered back before capturing his lips with mine. I'm not sure what came over me, really. I guess I just felt so good that I decided I was invincible or something.

Just then the front door opened, Eli and I tried to move apart, but we weren't fast enough. The next thing I knew, my mom was gasping.

"Eli I think you better go now," she said in a voice that was so controlled that I just knew that she was going to burst. "Adam, come inside please."

I followed her inside after squeezing Eli's hand and giving him an apologetic look. At first she just paced, wringing her hands. After what felt like a whole two minutes she stopped right in front of me. She looked like she was literally about to EXPLODE.

"So, this is the person you're dating?"

"Well, yeah mom."

"Is he why you haven't been eating right?"

"What, no!" I practically screamed at her. Now I was getting mad, I expected her to freak some if this ever happened, but I didn't think she would accuse him of making me sick. "What I eat or don't and who I date, isn't really your business!"

"What? Not my business? I'll tell you young la- man, your eating is my business because I love you and want you to stay here!"

"Ok, fine, but what about you having issue about me and Eli?"

"Oh come on Adam, how do you want me to react? First you're my daughter, and then you're my son, now you're gay?"

"I never said I was gay."

"Well, kissing a boy is pretty gay, unless now you're gonna tell me that you are a girl again."

"Mom, we've been over that one too many times already."

"Ok, then we're back to you being gay."

"Well, I don't know what I am; I just know that I like Eli. A lot."

She stood there speechless, opening and closing her mouth like a fish. "I can't handle this right now."

That did it. "You can't handle it? How do you think I feel mom? I'm falling for someone, really for the first time and I'm terrified of what will happen if anyone finds out. I'm the one who has to live in this body that feels so wrong, not you!"

"I know honey, it's just, I don't know what to do with this."

"Who says you have to do anything?" I didn't wait for her answer, I just ran upstairs and straight to my room. Once inside, I locked the door and went to my closet where I found the bag of chips, box of cookies and bottle of water I stashed there a while back. I checked the dates on everything and luckily they were still all good. I sat in my room listening to my mom bang on my door while I stuffed myself full of junk. Luckily for me, my mom gave up before I was finished. I shoved the wrappers into the trash and headed to the bathroom to puke in the shower.

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