Title: I Honestly Love You, too
Pairing: Finn/Kurt
Word Count: 2379, apparently
Warnings: Slash and swearing
Spoilers: Up to and including Theatricality
Summary: Based on this entry on LGMH:
One day, a 17 year old girl slipped into a coma. A boy she always had a crush on, but thought he never knew she existed, visited her every day, telling her how much he loved her.For a week he did this until she finally woke up, with the words "I love you" ringing in her ears.We have been married now for 5 years. Jason your LGMH.
A/N: Unbeta'd, so I'm sorry for any mistakes. I've been reading stories on LGMH all night, and I'm sobbing, so that is accountable for the mistakes, too.
Finn had never regretted anything more in his life than that one word he spoke to Kurt in anger. He hadn't meant it; he could never mean it. Kurt was basically his best friend, and he meant more to him than almost anyone else in the world – excluding his mom, of course. Kurt had been there for him consistently through everything. In fact, Finn was pretty certain that if Kurt hadn't been there through the baby drama (pre- and post- Puck revelations), he would have gone mental. But Finn had been a stupid, rash idiot – once again – and spoke before he thought, resulting in a collapse of their friendship.
His first attempt to patch up their rift – in that hideous Lady Gaga-inspired hot mess which Brittany had come up with – had worked... kinda. Kurt spoke to him, but only if he had to, and he was always cold and standoffish with him. It hurt – way more than he liked to admit – but he knew that he deserved it.
He'd tried everything to make things right. At least twice a week, he brought Kurt his favourite drink from Starbucks – a low fat Latte. He stepped in the path of any oncoming slushy, without care for his own clothes. With the help of Puck, Matt and Mike – and a few of the less bastard-y football players – he beat the shit out of Karofsky and Azimio, which stopped them from even thinking of hurting Kurt further. Kurt would always smile tightly at him and nod his thanks, but Finn knew that he hadn't been forgiven yet – he just didn't know what to do to make everything okay again.
"I know that you're not ready to forgive me yet, Kurt," Finn smiled, trying not to let his hurt show. "But I truly am sorry. You're like my best friend, and I just want to make it up to you."
Finn's whole world turned upside down when they were at Nationals that year – he wasn't exactly sure how they'd got there, but they had, and he didn't want to question the fates. They were being held in Dallas, Texas, much to the horror of the club. It was well-known how homophobic this area of the country was – a Bible-belt region if there ever was one. Kurt was out and proud – queer as a three dollar bill, he liked to say with a smile and Mr Schue always smiled this secret little smile back – and Brittany and Santana had just made their relationship official, which made the whole club terrified that something happening to the three of them.
Kurt agreed to tone down his appearance – instead of the out-there, crazy outfits he usually wore, he took only jeans and t-shirts to Dallas – and hold back on the very feminine aspects of his personality (make-up, musicals and manicures, mainly). Brittany and Santana agreed – very reluctantly – to hide their relationship for their four day stay in Dallas.
At first, it had worked, but one night, while the girls waited at the hotel, the six boys headed out to pick up some pizza. Finn, Puck, Matt and Mike waited in the shabby, tacky little joint for the pizzas, while Kurt and Artie waited outside. Suddenly, a scream had ripped through the air, and the four jocks had headed outside to find a group of fully grown men surrounding Kurt, hitting and kicking him repeatedly.
There were five of them, but, due to their anger and adrenaline, Finn, Puck, Matt and Mike easily pulled them off of Kurt. Finn cradled the smaller boy to his chest, while Puck dialled 911, Matt called Mr Schue, and Mike phoned Mercedes.
"Kurt, please, just stay with us," Finn pleaded. "Don't close your eyes, please. Just… just… don't leave me. I need you."
Finn couldn't remember much between then and arriving at the hospital. It was just a blur of flashing lights and beeping and bright white walls and blood. He remembered the blood. There was just so much of it: all over Kurt's clothes, and Finn's clothes and hands and face and arms… everywhere.
He was wearing a pair of green scrubs, and, though he couldn't remember putting them on, he had vague recollections of a sobbing Rachel helping him. His clothes had been covered in blood, Kurt's blood. His eyes were itchy and his head was sore from crying into Puck's shoulder, while the other boy hugged him tightly.
When Kurt was finally stabilised – more than seven hours after he'd been hospitalised – the doctors informed them that only family could visit him. Mr Schue had called Burt and his mom, and they were getting the next flight down, but that wasn't until the next afternoon. Not wanting Kurt to be alone, Finn told them that they were stepbrothers – not too much of a stretch of the truth – and he was allowed inside.
"Be strong," Rachel told him quietly, hugging him tightly. "He needs you now, Finn."
Seeing Kurt like that had made him feel guiltier about his words from before – 'faggy lamp' and 'faggy blanket' ran through his mind repeatedly, playing over and over again, like some kind of sick soundtrack – and it jolted Finn into a realisation. The thought hit him like a freight train, and Finn collapsed into the chair from shock: he loved Kurt. Not just familiar, brotherly, friendly love, but full on romantic love.
He didn't have the time to be freaked out by it. All he knew was that he had to be there for Kurt. It made sense, though. How he'd been so determined to make things up to Kurt. How upset he'd been by Kurt's coldness. How he had cradled Kurt in his arms like one held a baby or a child… or a lover.
It wasn't like that was the first time he'd had gay – well, bisexual – tendencies. He and Puck had jerked off together many times in the past, and he'd found himself fascinated by Puck's dick – that could have just been because of the size, though, because that thing was huge. Plus, there was the wet dreams he'd denied to himself about Mr Schue, and Kurt, and Puck and, well, you get the idea.
So, Finn settled into the chair comfortably, and began to speak to Kurt. Kurt had fallen into a coma from a blow to the head, and the doctor who had spoken to Finn had been unsure whether Kurt could hear him, but Finn spoke anyway. He told Kurt how sorry he was, how stupid he'd been, how much he loved him.
"I'm sorry," Finn sobbed, burying his head into the sheets on Kurt's bed. "I'm so sorry. You didn't deserve this, Kurt. You're the strongest, kindest, nicest person I know. Please, just wake up, Kurt. I need you so much. Please. I love you, and I know that you won't believe me, but I do. I think that I've loved you for a long time, but I was just, you know, in denial. Please, Kurt…"
His continued like that every day for the next week. His mom and Burt arrived in the earlier hours of the morning two days after that, but Finn continued his vigil at Kurt's bedside, only leaving when his mom, Burt, or one of the Glee kids forced him to.
After watching Finn bent over Kurt's bedside, in tears most of the time, apologising and telling him that he loved him, even though the chances were that Kurt couldn't hear him, made Burt forgive Finn immediately. It was obvious that Finn hadn't meant what he'd said – but, if the boy hurt his son again, then Burt would be on him with a tire iron quicker than he could say Glee.
"I know you probably can't hear me," Finn began, gripping Kurt's hand in his own. "But I just want to tell you – again – how sorry I am. I never meant what I said. I was stupid and idiotic, and I'm so sorry. I love you, Kurt, so much; I just never realised it. Please, just wake up. I just want to hear your voice again… even if it is to tell me that I'm an idiot. Please."
Kurt didn't stir, and Finn resisted the urge to start screaming and shouting and breaking things – like that stupid metal trolley in the corner of the room. Just one kick and all of the stupid things would scatter. It wouldn't do any good, but it might make him feel better.
The doctors had said that Kurt's vitals were good, but that they were unsure when – or even if – he would regain consciousness. They were hopeful, of course, but with head injuries, it was always hard to tell. Finn hated them for that uncertainty, even though it wasn't their fault. All he wanted was for Kurt to wake up.
With a sigh, Finn started to sing. He knew that it was one of Kurt's favourites, and after finding it on Kurt's iPod two days after Kurt had been admitted to the hospital, he'd listened to it so much that he knew the lyrics off by heart. It made him feel closer to Kurt – especially since it was the song Kurt had wanted to sing to him all of those months ago.
But this feeling doesn't come along everyday
And you shouldn't blow the chance
When you've got the chance to say
I love you
I honestly love you
Kurt still didn't stir, and Finn didn't know why he'd thought that a song could help. Sure, Mr Schue said that music was this great, wondrous thing, but it wasn't as if it had magical healing powers like those stupid potions and plants in Harry Potter.
"I love you," Finn said quietly, getting to his feet.
He seriously needed food or he would die of starvation, so Finn reluctantly headed for the door. After a last glance at Kurt, and a look over at a sleeping Burt, Finn stepped out the room – only to rush back inside when he heard a soft splutter behind him.
"Kurt?"
Kurt spluttered again, and Finn realised that there was a tube to help him breathe down his throat. Finn pressed the buzzer on the wall, to call for a nurse, a doctor, someone,before slipping his hand into Kurt's
The doctor ran into the room within seconds, and, with the help of a nurse, he removed the tube, allowing Kurt to breathe. He looked between Kurt and Finn's conjoined hands, and left again to 'allow them a minute or two together'.
"F-F-Finn?" Kurt asked hoarsely.
"It's alright, Kurt, I'm here," Finn whispered, squeezing Kurt's hand. "I'm so sorry. I love you."
Finn watched as Kurt swallowed deeply before answering, "I know. I could hear you." He paused, swallowing again, before adding, "I love you, too."
Two years later, during Spring Break of their Senior year, Finn and Kurt eloped to Massachusetts, where they married in a quiet ceremony. Though their family and friends were angry because they hadn't been there, none could admit these feelings aloud when they saw the very happy couple together, hugging and kissing and just generally being in love.
Five years after that, after Finn had earned his Bachelor's degree in Music Education from NYU, and Kurt had his Bachelor of Fine Arts from F.I.T, they were living in New York, in a small, cosy apartment, paid for by their new jobs – and partly by Burt, who was just wanted to see his son and son-in-law/stepson happy and secure. Finn was working at a local high school, teaching music, while Kurt worked at Proenza Schouler.
It wasn't until three years later that the two, still very much in love, made the tough decision to have children. Their surrogate, Maria, gave birth to twins – George and Roxanne Hummel-Hudson – just thirteen months later, and Finn was pretty certain that no one could have predicted the maternal instincts which arose in Kurt upon their birth – he fondly called him 'mama bear' due to his almost unnatural protective instincts.
Watching his husband singing his children to sleep, Finn had never been happier in his life. He reflected sadly on how stupid he had been in the past, and how it had taken Kurt almost dying for him to realise that he loved the smaller boy – well, man now. At least he had Kurt now – and had had him for almost fifteen years.
"Kurt, baby, I honestly love you. You know that, right?"
With a fond smile, Kurt nodded, wrapping his arms around Finn's waist. "And I, you."
Finn trailed a gentle finger down the faint scar on the side of Kurt's face, just hidden by his hair, which he received in that attack in Texas back in 2010. His lips pressed softly against it, and then he buried his face in Kurt's hair.
"You give me hope," Kurt whispered, his face pushed against the soft cotton of Finn's worn t-shirt, trying to fend off the tears he knew were coming. "I know that as long as I have you, everything will be okay in the end, no matter what happens."