Takes place ten years after season 8. Eric loses his comic book store due to a turn in the economy but has a stroke of luck that hinges on perfect timing. Can he save his little store? Can a certain brunette actress help him with time to spare? Totally AU and non-canon – just a fun little fiction with some drama

TWO TICKETS TO PARADISE

Chapter 01 – Back to Basics

1990

Eric added another newspaper wrapped statue to the collection in the box, closed the lid and taped it shut. He looked around his store and felt like crying. The Forman Fantasy Collectible Comic Store was closing. The Kenosha store had been open for six years and business was thriving. That was until the permanent closure of the auto plant that had supplied employment for the last 90 years. Now it had been sold to a European conglomerate that only contracted work for specific engines due to automation and a robotic assembly line.

Red dropped another box by the front door and stretched his back; "Son, I don't know what to tell you. This was a craphole of a building and with this 1990 economy; no one is interested in buying your product."

Eric ran his fingers through his hair. How long had he been packing – two…three days? When was the last time he even took a shower? "Dad, are you sure mom doesn't mind that I'm crashing at the house for a while?"

Red sat down on a cardboard box and sighed, "Son, we know times are hard and you put a good effort into your little business. Hell, I was hoping that out of all of us, you'd be the success….your mother will welcome you back with open arms but I'm telling you now. This is just short term. I expect you to find gainful employment and you're gonna pay rent."

Eric had to smile. Red had mellowed a lot these last ten years. Hyde moved to New York with WB and was working in the music business while Laurie lived in a commune on the West Coast with a yuppie who dealt with organic foods. Kitty Forman was suffering a severe case of Empty Nest Syndrome. Eric would always be welcome back.

"Thanks Dad, I'll pack up the rest of this and leave the key for the building owner. I should be home for dinner."

Red felt more tired than his 63 years. These were supposed to be his golden times. The kids were supposed to be gone so he could play poker and enjoy the time with his wife. Now, Kitty was back to working part time at the hospital because his meager pension wouldn't pay all the bills and he had two more years to go until he could collect the social security he'd paid into all those years. Having a third person in the house was going to put a strain on the budget. Yep, Eric was definitely paying some rent!

Eric went behind the display counter to pick up some miscellaneous souvenirs he wanted to keep from past conventions. Those were so great – he made a good friend at the Science Fiction convention in Madison and they conversed frequently as well as traded rare comics. A trip to Indianapolis for a comic expo introduced him to a cute girl who left him after a wild night. He smiled as he picked up a lottery scratcher. Maybe he'd send this to Aunt Paula; it was very unlikely he'd ever go back to Indiana! He stuffed the memorabilia in his back pocket and walked to the fuse box. With the exception of the light at the front of the store, he turned them off, one light at a time.

His dream of owning his own store disappeared into the darkness.

T7S

Eric parked his car behind a Hertz Rent-a-Car. Visitors for dinner? Funny, his dad didn't mention it. Eric pocketed his car keys and walked in the familiar patio doors. He hadn't been back in Point Place for a few months. Kitty was always scolding him for missing dinner and how was he supposed to stay healthy eating all that microwave food? It would be nice to be home – for just a while!

A feminine voice was in the living room and it sounded like she was getting hysterical. Eric pushed through the swinging door that led from the kitchen. He saw the back of a tall blonde swathed in colorful scarves and precariously tall heels.

"I don't care what she told you, it's important to me. Her father died for heavens sake! I need my daughter to grieve with me."

Red pinched the bridge of his nose and looked at Kitty with that "here we go again" expression on his face.

Kitty saw Eric and her eyes got big. "Oh honey! You came home." She ran right past Pamela Burkhart and grabbed her son in a death hug. "I missed you. I'm sorry you lost your little store." Remembering her manners, Kitty turned to Pam. "You remember my boy Eric?"

Pam waved her hand, "Uh…yeah..sure, he was…you were dating Bob's daughter or something like that! What ever happened with you and the red head?"

Eric swallowed hard. Pamela Burkhart was still a foxy older woman. Her skin was tight and tan and if he wasn't mistaken, she had a nice boob job since he'd seen her last. She looked great for a 50+ year old woman. She saw the gleam in his eye and sauntered sexily over to Kitty Forman's son.

The tip of her well manicured finger ran over his shoulder and up his chin. "Have you seen my daughter lately? She seems to be hiding from me."

Eric coughed, "No, I haven't seen Jackie in years. Last I heard she was living in Michigan."

Pam frowned then touched her frown lines and smoothed them out. "Well, she can't hide forever. Red, go make me a Tequila Sunrise, you know that's my favorite drink." Kitty was dismayed when her husband ran to the bar to prepare a drink for their uninvited guest.

Kitty pushed Eric behind her like he was a little boy that needed protecting. "Pam, your ex-husband has been dead for five years. Why do you keep coming back here?"

Pamela looked down the length of her nose at the shorter woman. "Jacqueline has something that belongs to me."

Kitty tried not to scoff, "Oh for Pete's sake, you just want to put your greedy hands on her Trust Fund. Just like you do every year and she's always one step ahead of you. Why don't you go back to your tortilla making boyfriend and leave the poor child alone?"

Red came over with a highball glass filled with ice and grenadine covered with orange juice. He even added one of Kitty's special little umbrellas to the glass! "Here ya go Pam."

Pamela Burkhart smiled at Red and Kitty could swear her husband blushed. "Oh Red, you are such a gentleman." Pamela tipped the glass and downed the drink in nearly one swallow. "Ahhhh…refreshing. Well, I guess if you can't….or won't help me find Jackie…." She glared at Kitty as she said this, "I'll just be at the Marriott hotel. You can call me." Pam put the cocktail glass on the coffee table and touched Red's cheek. "Red Forman, you are such a sweet man to be married to such a shrew…..shrewdly valuable woman!"

Pam tossed her scarf around her neck and flounced out of the living room in a perfumed cloud. Eric wanted to follow the smell but his mom had an arm around his neck. He looked at his dad who seemed gaga-eyed over the newly blonde Pamela Burkhart.

"Does she do this often?"

Kitty looked at her son, "Every year like clockwork. Your father here is going to bust his pacemaker if he doesn't stop ogling her. Now, get your things and you can take Laurie's old room. I've turned it into a guest bedroom. I'm going to start dinner." She smacked Red on the arm, "She's gone so you can stop looking at the door."

Red looked back at his wife, "What? I was just making sure she didn't trip in those extremely tall high heels."

Kitty rolled her eyes, "Red Forman, she was flirting with you for heaven's sake, you're not 30 years old anymore. Come help me make dinner."

Red looked at his son and muttered, "At least I'm not dead!"

T7S

Eric looked at his sister's old room. His mom had redecorated and it looked nice with a fresh coat of light grey paint. There was a wrought iron day bed with a blue and mauve comforter. A narrow dresser was available for his clothes. Since he lived in the small apartment in the back of the store, he could bring up a table and his television. This should do quite nicely.

He hadn't expected to return to the Forman household amid such drama. Who was going to show up next? Bob Pinciotti - his former father-in-law? That would never happen. Bob loved it in Orlando with Donna, Chris, her husband of the last six years and their five year old son, little Bobby Lyons. After graduating from Madison in the top ten of her class, Donna and Chris moved south and started their own local newspaper. Eric always wished her well since their 1983 divorce had been so amicable. He would always consider Donna a good friend and he actually liked Chris.

His little spell of reminiscing was interrupted by his mom hollering that dinner wasn't getting any hotter and to hurry it up. Eric laughed – that was so like his mother and for the first time in weeks, he actually felt like everything was going to be okay.

"Mom, this smells great! I haven't had real pot roast in a long time." Eric exclaimed as he sat at the little round green table. Red was cutting into a thick slab of beef. "That's because all those TV dinners used processed meat. You're just eating refined bits of beef and other meats. You know the kind that's just one step above dog food."

Kitty scolded her husband, "Red, don't tell the boy things like that!" She looked at Eric, "Even though it's true, we should talk about dog food at the dinner table. There are some respectable old senile people that do eat that stuff."

Red sprinkled some Worcestershire sauce on his meat and groaned after the first bite. "Boy, you can't eat better than your mother's cooking."

Kitty used the plastic tongs and put some salad on her plate. "That's true dear. You have to get healthy again, all that processed food is not good for you. Look at your father; he's as healthy as a horse with that pacemaker …just as long as Pamela Burkhart stays away." Kitty added with emphasis.

Red ignored the comment and looked at his son, "Price Mart is hiring in their electronics division and the hospital is always looking for janitors."

Eric did not want to clean up vomit, blood or patient bathrooms! "I'll probably check out Price Mart. Thanks dad."

Kitty swallowed some of her Bloody Mary, "We have a great team at the hospital honey and you could probably get any shift work you want."

"Mom, I'm just not a nurturing kind of person like you are. I think I take after Dad in that respect." Eric looked at his father who looked rather proud at that moment. "I'm going to check out Price Mart in the morning."

T7S

Eric was exhausted. The toll of selling most of his inventory and packing his tiny apartment along with the store finally caught up to him. The Forman shower never felt better and he liked the smell of the shampoo much better than the generic brand he usually bought.

He crawled in between the sheets of the daybed, grateful for the smell of clean linen and was only partially dismayed to find that the bed was shorter than his five foot eleven inch frame. He wouldn't complain because his parents were helping him out. He'd just pull up his knees and get a good night of sleep – he needed it.

Kitty was standing outside the guest bedroom listening when Red caught her. "What are you doing?" He asked quizzically.

She smiled, "Listening to him snore. Red…when did our kids grow up? One day they're children playing in the yard and eating popsicles, the next day their living in the basement eating all of our food. Now Laurie is living in sin with a nice fellow, Steven never calls, Donna married that nice boy from Sheboygan and Michael is having a third baby. What happened to all the time?"

Red gathered his wife in his arms and kissed the top of her head. "They moved on. They haven't abandoned us; they're just finding their way back. Give them time."

Kitty hugged Red's arm. "If Jackie calls, don't forget to tell her that her mother is back in town."

Red groaned, "That poor girl, it's a wonder how she stays one step ahead of Pam."

Kitty chuckled, "Well, I didn't say anything but she's coming back towards the end of the month. She's an extra in that RoboCop sequel they filmed in Michigan."

Red lifted an eyebrow. "I liked that movie and she made a fine dead body. So she's alive in this movie?"

Kitty laughed, "Yes, she's an extra but she said it pays well. She's stopping by Point Place on her way to Chicago – she's working as a court room stenographer for that new law show, "Deals Gone Bad". The ladies at the salon say it's all about divorces and feuding neighbors. I can't wait to see it."

Red grinned. "Well, there's something I can't wait to see and it's in our bedroom." Kitty looked at the smoldering look her husband was giving her, "Oh you frisky man. Let's go see what comes up!"

T7S

DISCLAIMER: The author is only borrowing the show's characters and likenesses for a fictitious story to be enjoyed by the readers. The author has also borrowed some movie titles and does not own those either. I guess that covers it!