"…and that is when I will grant you your great gift, Wormtail," Voldemort rasped. He took a short look around the dust-filled chamber he was sitting in, his faithful snake Nagini laying at his side with a fierce look in her eyes. Voldemort expected Wormtail to start begging at his feet, praising the mighty Voldemort and his newfound rise at the hands of Harry Potter.

But Voldemort did not see Wormtail at his feet, nor did he see the ratty man anywhere in the general vicinity of his throne. Where is that worthless pile of rat droppings? the Dark Lord thought.

Seconds later, Voldemort wished he had never noticed the man.

"Look at me, master! I'm a wiiiiiiild wizard!" Wormtail was dancing like a madman in the center of the room. He started with a moonwalk, followed by the worm, and began a feisty session of the Macarena.

"I command you to cease," shrieked He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named. Nagini hissed and attempted to cover her eyes with the tip of her tai.

Wormtail, however, didn't seem to have heard his evil master, as he segued into the robot before doing the most horrifying, disgusting act he could have possibly done in the limits of his power.

He took his robe off.

Wormtail's belly showed years' worth of unwashed dirt, grime, and a ferret that seemed to be living in his chest hair. HE continued to dance, jigging to an unheard disco beat before starting an exotic belly dance. It was only when Wormtail made a grab for his undergarments that You-Know-Who acted.

"Avada Kedavra!" The shout rang through the damp corridor, as a flash of green light left Wormtail limp on the ground.

Voldemort sheathed his wand before looking over at Nagini, who had removed her eye shield and was now looking, relieved, at the corpse of the horrible dancer. "That," said Voldemort, "was emotionally disturbing."