Ah, what happened to the days when I had ten reviews for every chapter? Mou, have I been gone so long no one reads Naruto fanfiction anymore? Ah well…

It seems Muse!Naruto doesn't like things as they are. He just wouldn't leave me alone *sweatdrop* Who am I to complain though? What's the point of denying the world more Schoolgirl!Naruto?

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-*No Safe Place II*-

…

Naruto closed the medicine cabinet and caught 'her' reflection.

Matsumoto Aoi gazed back at him, eyes still heavy with sleep even after a hot shower. A dab of gel and a quick comb-through had worked miracles on previously hopeless hair, leaving it tame and manageable. Two glittery red hair clips kept the bangs at bay, showcasing eyes that went from drowsy to sultry with an application of eyeliner and a scant brush of eyeshadow. The only things that remained of Uuzmaki Naruto were the three scars on each cheek. They were deep enough to make the thought of foundation laughable.

He fingered the mask he had taken from the cabinet before slipping the elastic over his ears. A frieze of chibi characters danced over a white background, the innocence it implied completing the transformation into Aoi-chan, Silver Pearl's newest darling, adored by classmates, acknowledged by teachers, and chased by perverts who just couldn't take a hint.

Like the one sleeping in the other room.

Crack.

"Shit," he sighed, the expletive seemingly at odds with the angelic reflection as he shook his hand free from the tingling sensation. Any more outbursts, unintentional though they were, and he would have to pay to replace the sink.

Hanging the damp towel on the rack, as was his wont, he strode naked into his dark, cool room, the light from the bathroom spilling over to create an orange-tinged stripe on the floor. He could see well enough that he didn't need to open his window to let in the morning. The last time he had tried that, the unconscious peeping toms had been found strung up a tree by their underwear.

His uniform hung on the closet door, pressed and ready for another day of torture. He sighed again, this time in defeat, reaching for the skirt that he personally felt was too short for decency. Then came the binding around his chest, a bit difficult, but since he had emphatically turned down wearing a bra, the thick cloth would accentuate his pectoral muscles and provide a more palatable illusion. It was hidden by a lacy undershirt, then a short-sleeved white blouse, a silver-buttoned black vest, and finally the school jacket, the emblem proudly stitched onto the left breast pocket. Suffice it to say that the combination was literally as hot as hell.

But never as hot as the cycling shorts he reluctantly slid into before pulling on a pair of knee-high socks. They were a godsend, he had to admit, an acceptable alternative to the lacy, flimsy underthings that both his current teammates seemed to favor when they had gone shopping. It still didn't change the fact that, on a humid day, they felt like the devil's own furnace. It would serve Tsunade right if his junk shriveled up and he could never have kids.

He finished lacing up his boots, the last vestige of his vanishing masculinity, and stood up to appraise himself in the mirror. 'Aoi-chan' was a stranger, disquietingly ethereal in the grey morning light filtering through the curtains. She looked like a person who could be accepted into society, the kind of person who fell in love and had a normal life.

Naruto shook his head free from wistful thoughts. Now was not the time to fall into dreams.

Uniform worn properly, check. Underwear on, check. Tie in hand, check. Bookbag on the chair, check. Mask in place, check.

…

"Good morning, Aoi-chan. How did you sleep?"

"Fine, thank you, Aunt, Uncle." He bowed respectfully to the occupants of the kitchen as he entered.

The Matsumotos, as well as the Fujisakis and Ootas, were part of a network of undercover families, former agents of Hidden Leaf that had established a foothold in the farther villages and cities. Their homes served as safehouses for agents that passed through or were on a mission such as theirs. Naruto and his team were posing as distant relatives, and had provided the necessary documentation that would keep nosy snoopers at bay.

"You look good enough to eat, Aoi-chan."

A leering Gaara caught the swinging bag inches away from his face. His boyfriend glared daggers in his direction before sitting down with an audible huff.

"Now, now my dears, let's not fight at the table."

"Sorry, Matsumoto –san," Naruto said contritely, looking up at the matronly figure as she set a plate before him. She had been beautiful in the past, he could see it in her smile.

"Quite alright, dear." She said with a chuckle. "I can't remember the last time I've had such a cute couple in my home."

An arm insidiously wound around Naruto's waist, and he felt a hot puff of breath on his neck. "Did you hear that, Aoi-chan?"

He put a forkful of fish in his mouth, concentrating on the taste and not on the fact that a muscle was beginning to tick on his forehead. "I'm not deaf."

"I never thought I'd ever find such a girl on my arm." The taunt was audible in the husky voice.

"You don't say."

"No wonder all the boys are after you."

Twitch.

"Mmm," was all the blond said, taking a sip of water.

"You are so unresponsive in the morning." Gaara purred in his ear, smiling in the face of danger. "If I didn't know better, I'd think you weren't the same noisy wildcat from last night, all hot and bothered, tied up and just b-"

It took him five minutes to remove the fork from his thigh, and by that time, Naruto was already long gone.

…

"Mizuki, a word in my office. Now."

Gaara, his distinctive green eyes now hidden by dark brown lenses, nodded graciously at the curt command.

Madam was an imposing figure perpetually dressed in austere black, her hair pulled back in a neat bun, and surprisingly blessed with enough 'womanly charm' to challenge Tsunade herself. It wasn't until she had taken a seat that he noticed they weren't alone in the windowed office.

'Aoi' was sitting in one of the chairs, the picture of meek submission. She sat ramrod-straight, legs crossed primly, her hands in her lap. Gaara couldn't imagine how many hours his lover must have practiced in order to pull off such a flawlessly aristocratic pose. His tendency to hyperactivity was nowhere to be seen in the impassively masked face. However…he caught the look in 'her' eyes, and nearly smiled despite the twinge in his still painfully sore thigh.

"I will not beat around the bush, Mizuki. It has come to my attention that you were witnessed making inappropriate gestures towards one of our young ladies. Explain yourself, if you please."

Blue eyes narrowed, promising the redhead's demise if his mission was compromised. He covered the small hand with his head and shook his head minutely. "My deepest apologies for not informing you. There is a special bond between Matsumoto-san and I. It is why I have followed her and applied for a position at your school."

If anything, seeing the comforting gesture seemed to inflame the woman even more. "For what purpose?" She asked, her tremendous bosom heaving with ire. "Teachers are not allowed to fraternize with students! You have shamed my school. I should fire you right now and expel Miss Matsumoto."

"Please don't-"

"My apologies once more." The tall 'teacher' bowed, speaking over Naruto's agitated voice. "However, I am afraid you cannot do that. If you'll read this…" A stiff white letter was placed on the polished mahogany of the desk and he stepped back.

"What are you doing?" came the nearly inaudible hiss beside him. Gaara winked at the blond, who was somehow managing to look venomous and confused at the same time.

The headmistress, her suspicious eyes still trained on the genial smile pasted on his face, picked up a copper letter opener that nevertheless gleamed in the sunlight. Naruto briefly entertained the thought of castration as applied to a certain smug bastard, but watched in interest as various expressions began to flicker over the woman's face. Finally, she put the letter back down, her eyebrows pinched and disapproving.

"The director of the Board of Education has been made aware of your circumstances." She stated blandly, regaining her composure. "Although I do not approve, you both may remain here. Be warned though, Mizuki. I will not tolerate any uncouth and unbecoming behavior in my school. You are dismissed. Oh, and Miss Matsumoto?"

The small blond girl, having just risen and in the act of escaping this strange and unusual torture, turned to look at her with one perfect eyebrow raised. "Yes, Ma'am?"

"Congratulations on your betrothal."

…

By lunchtime, the news had spread to the entire student body, setting loose a wave of wildfire that converged on one spot.

"Is it true, Aoi-chan? You're engaged to Mizuki-sensei?"

"I'm so jealous!"

"Is it an arranged marriage?"

"How long have you been together?"

"Are you having sex with him?"

'Aoi' tried to fight down a blush, unaware that this awkward effort made her look even more irresistible. "He's nothing but a pervert!"

"Ah, but your face is so red!" One classmate, a cheerfully smiling brunette, nudged him and raised a finger matter-of-factly. "That means you like him!"

"That's not true!" Expressive blue eyes burned with vehemence, dainty hands on the verge of strangling a bag strap into disrepair. "He's the worst kind of person, Mit-chan, worse than anyone!"

"I thought he was kind of cute when he was teaching our class."

"He's a pervert, and he's got weird tastes, and he's old!"

"There's only a few years between us, my darling Aoi-chan."

Naruto made a strange noise at the back of his throat and tried to duck away in the crowd, but a strong grip caught the back of his jacket before he could take the first step. "Where are you going?"

"As far away from you as I can, you freaky asshole!"

"I recall punishing you last night for all the bad words you said yesterday. Don't tell me I have to do it again?"

There was no escape. Naruto craned his neck as much as he was able, looking desperately for a way out. They were surrounded by a horde of lovestruck girls, oohing and aahing at the romantic picture he imagined they saw. They had no idea that the tall, imposingly handsome redhead was nothing but a cad who thought with his groin. There was just no way…until Naruto saw Ino and Tenten walking down the corridor. His struggles became more pronounced.

"Hana-chan!" he called plaintively. "Rei-sempai!"

Gaara caught his wrists and tightened his hold until Naruto could feel the warm breath on his neck, just like this morning. Despite his current annoyed state of mind, he felt a thrill in the pit of his stomach.

"Lower your voice. We don't want to get into trouble again, do we?"

The hampered blond bared his teeth, wishing dearly that he didn't have the mask on so he could rip his lover's throat out. "Eat shit, Mizuki."

A gentle touch caressed his nape as words reverberated in the chest he was caught so steadfastly against. "Call me sensei."

"Not even on my deathbed, you sadistic prick!"

"Aoi." And now, instead of a touch, there was a mouth, hot and wet and tantalizingly slow. Naruto could have moaned. "Say it. Now."

Arrogant bastard.

"Mi. Zu. Ki." Naruto hissed as his eyes blazed with a mixture of emotions, drawing out every syllable in a blatant challenge.

He should have known better really. Everybody knew Gaara never backed down from a challenge.

"Such a bad girl."

The redhead used his spare hand to tilt up the hidden chin. He felt a swell of pride deepening his smile even as his fingers slid over the elegant throat. This 'schoolgirl', harmless and unthreatening in every way, was nothing but a mere construct. Though she was a beauty beyond compare, it paled in comparison to what was behind the mask: a spirit fiery in its courage and passion, yet innocent enough to intoxicate any man. The scent of heated peaches and vanilla made him light-headed. This was why he had come, why he couldn't wait in the sidelines when other people touched what was his. His reputation be damned. Nothing could compare to this. A mere taste could never be enough, but it would have to do.

For now.

Naruto stilled, frozen in time as Gaara turned his head to meet his own. It was awkward, his neck protesting against the harsh position, but when the lips he loved brushed over the ones he had hidden, his heart throbbed. It was sweet and gentle, so much so that he could hear the rest of the world go silent. His lover's heart beat against his back and for a moment, nothing else mattered.

"Aoi-chan! Mizuki-sempai!"

Crap.

Gaara raised an eyebrow at the two teenagers who had pushed through the awe-struck crowd. Ino, her face flame-red, was properly scandalized, but Ten-ten was looking a touch less embarrassed, and actually more amused than anything. He knew the brunette was more sadistic than she let on. His armful whined softly at the loss of contact, eyes still closed, eyelashes feather-light against the downy cheek. He let Naruto down slowly, still tightly pressed together so the blond shuddered as he felt everything.

"On you go."

It seemed like his voice had flipped on a switch. Horrifying images buzzing through his mind, Naruto whirled around on his heel, now intent on dealing destruction. If his eyes could spit poison, his boyfriend would be a mere puddle on the floor. His short skirt fanned at the movement, giving Gaara a great view of his ass.

Which was probably why he didn't duck Naruto's fist.

…

"Are you sure you're alright?"

"Just fine."

The doctor shook her head in exasperation. The new teacher sat on one of the cots in the infirmary, a pack of ice held to his swelling cheek. He was still smiling.

"Are you sure you don't want to tell me what happened?"

The door slid open. "Mitzugawa-sensei?"

"Oh dear. What happened?"

"Mit-chan slipped in track today and- what are you doing here?

"Now, Aoi-chan, is that anyway to talk to a teacher?"

Mitzugawa shook her head, this time with a faint smile on her face. Lover's quarrels.

…

-*End*-