.:This Baby Is Not Mine!:.
Author Note:
Though I wrote the first chapter of this story on a whim, I noticed that so many liked it so am gonna take this story seriously now!
Thanks for all the sweet reviews; you are all really awesome~
Thanks also for the best Beta-reader ever Cheesyfreezy who helped me with this, she also wrote the last paragraph or so...
Waking up early was a thing no one who lived in this house was used to.
Hiyori opened her half asleep hazel eyes, as her very sensitive ears picked a new strange sound, the chirping of the morning birds outside no longer had the effect of disturbing her sleep.
Picking up her Zanpaktou, all senses fixed solely on finding the source of this annoying and very irritating sound, then proceeding onto exterminating it completely.
Walking confidently across the hall while the coldness of the wooden floor kissed her bare feet, Hiyori paid no mind to the freezing sensation creeping up her spine.
She would find whoever dared to agitate her 'beauty' sleep and make sure they never wake up for the next few days or so.
Hiyori grinned deviously, her mind already picturing the target, images of its beaten and mangled question-marked face flashing in her drowsy mind, making her brighten up somehow. She would simply wash that dense smirk off those revolting features.
Hiyori felt eccentric as this strange sound traveled to her ears once again, she just wasn't able to identify it.
Feeling victorious, a smile crept up her lips, as she stopped walking now, her feet led her to Shinji's room.
Her slender fingers circled the door-knob, turning it slowly and entering the room.
Her eyes were now no longer half opened as they winded in surprise, for there stood Shinji over a small cradled stuff that her drowsy conscious later recognized was a baby.
A flashback of last night's events played in her mind, her legs backed a little remembering all the rage she wanted to befall upon this baldy.
Apparently- Shinji now has a freakin' baby. She almost forgot.
Almost as if he sensed her, he sighed as he lift the small blanketed infant, stroking her small head a little before heading towards the door, seemingly not caring –as he usually would- that she barged into his room like that.
Suppressing a snort at his expense, Hiyori had to admit that what she was seeing now was quite funny, if not hilarious.
The almighty leader of the Vizards and the ex-captain of the 13th was now standing in front of her with his beloved hair all tangled and messy, shirt wrinkled with a few buttons opened here and there. Hiyori also noticed the few unidentified stains that decorated his clothing, his eyes dull with black bags under them.
And small hands reaching to pull at his hair.
Hiyori could not keep quiet anymore, as Shinji wasn't even able to feel her presence. She cracked her lips open and her laughing filled the household, tears started forming at the corner of her shut eyes, hands already grabbing at her poor stomach.
Shinji looked her way, not the slightest bit amused, the tot girl he thought was an angle already fidgeting in his arms.
He felt like dying again, he finally was able to make her sleep and now this stupid pig-tailed woman had barged in so noisily, waking up this little devil that they call a baby.
Roaming the room with his barley seeing eyes, Shinji would find his Zanpaktou and kill Hiyori right this moment, only if he wasn't already beaten up.
"Hiyori, just shut the fuck up! You've woken her up! I've been trying for ages to get her to sleep!" even his voice was drained; Hiyori couldn't contain a stifle at the sight of his serious face.
"Why the hell should I care baldy? She's yer responsibility, you know? Yer duty to shut her up for all good's sake. I was coming to kill her as promised for irritating my sleep, but your sight was worth it" she bit back, snorting at the last sentence, "I'm starting to like this kid." Hiyori felt happiness, as some love began to form toward this creature and its abilities to make Shinji break down.
His gaze locked with Hiyori's as he shot her a deadly glare, making the tot release small frowning sounds. Hiyori smiled teasingly.
"Shhh, sweetie, or the pig monster will come and eat ya~" Shinji cooed sweetly in the infant's ear, loud enough to make Hiyori hear as he rocked the baby in his arms.
"What's wrong with her anyway?" Hiyori started walking towards them, trying not to fall while evading the mess that hugged the floor.
"If I fuckin' knew would I be looking like a trash-can exploded in my face? I've already tried many things, but none seemed to work!" Shinji sounded desperate. Hiyori thought that waking up early for once today might be worth it after all; it's not every day she could see Shinji suffering like this. She would enjoy this to the max.
"Ew! Shinji you smell awful. God, who died in here?" Hiyori wrinkled her nose as she stood right next to him now.
"Really? I kinda lost all my senses after midnight" sniffing himself then sniffing the little baby, Shinji's face turned into something of disgusted horror as he held the baby away towards Hiyori.
"Keep it away from me, Shinji!" Hiyori backed away as he started running after her.
"Just wait a minute!" Hiyori stopped and so did Shinji.
"I think she needs a change; I once saw it in a movie. We need to get diapers!" Hiyori felt proud as she thought of this brilliant idea.
"Now I see!" forcing the baby into Hiyori's opened arms, yanking his winter long coat from the holder. Shinji ran his slim fingers through his hair while he ran like the wind reaching the front door in a hast, his form already a blur in Hiyori's confused state of mind.
"Take care of Haru-chan while I'm away!" his voice traveled the space separating the two as Hiyori stood dumfounded.
One, two, thr-
"SHINJIIIIIIIIIII!" her cry of annoyance could be heard approximately 483 miles ahead.
The infant started to sob uncontrollably, making Hiyori flinch and stiffen in complete loss.
'Mashiro? No no, not healthy. Lisa? ... Just no. Hachi? Hachi!' Hiyori quickly voted her options as she started for Hachi's room, holding the infant at arm's length.
Barging into his room, she found no one. Slightly scared –and highly irritated with the loud high-pitched cries- she dropped the whole idea, and a glance at the poor thing in her hands made her decide to deal with it herself.
Sighing, Hiyori headed for her room, rocking the little girl slowly while whispering sweet nothing to make her quiet down, and it worked.
'You're mine, Shinji; I'll torture you to Hell and back.' She thought furiously, as she was now trying to keep her stomach in place while removing the dirty diaper.
'First, I'll plug out his nails and add salt to the wounds, and then I'll use a hammer to make flour out of his bones. Should I also spray pepper in hi-'
"-nghhee~ aghuuu~" Hiyori's murderous train of thoughts was cut off by small squealing noises emitting from the little girl who found sudden interest in Hiyori's pigtails.
Staring in wonder at big pools of dark brown, Hiyori couldn't help feeling small rasps of rupture to shock through her as the infant was finally pleased and peaceful. So she needed to clean her up, put on a new piece of cotton –until she kicked Shinji's ass for not getting diapers- and it's all done.
Yup, Hiyori wore her determination on: she may not have motherly behaviors; but in no way would she let something as insignificant to break her down like with the idiot…
"Quiet, we need to get you cleaned, Haru…" Hiyori felt alien, as her low tone was rarely used; her sweet one was practically never used. And she used them both in that sentence.
'Hmm, Haru? Maybe that's the mother's name…?'
Two hours later
Is this kind of a cliff hanger? am gonna go with that XD
wait for Shinji's return next chapter, something really funny will happen!
Thanks for reading, reviews are well loved~
Hafous