Disclaimer: I don't know why you'd happen to think that I might even own a small bit of Glee, because I don't.
A/N: This is actually the first Puck/Kurt story idea I'd come up with. I'm sad to say that it's taken me this long to actually finish it. I have no idea why it took this long, but it did. Also, I made a graphic for this fic and because this is ff . net you don't get to see it whilst those on LJ do. But if you click on my homepage of my profile, go to either the post for this story or my master list of Glee fics then go to the post of this story, you will see the graphic I'd made. But I do hope you enjoy this story.
It came to him while he was eating his peas. Not a normal thing to be doing when you get a revelation - especially one as big and awesome as the one he got. Still, that's when he saw it. The potential of Kurt and Puck.
They should totally be together. It'd be epic. And epic in a good way and not in a 'oh damn, that's an epic amount of smoke coming from the microwave'. Finn found himself nodding and smiling at the idea when his mom asked him if the peas where really that good.
That night he took out his notebook and at the top wrote 'The Puck and Kurt Mash-Up' and underlined it. Jotting a few ideas down he idly wrote a heart between their names and then smiled as he realized their names fit together. PucKurt. Clearly this was meant to be. He quickly closed the notebook when Kurt came into the room and sat down to do his nightly skin care.
"You okay?" He looked at Finn using the mirror.
Finn nodded, hoping he didn't look like he was hiding something, "Oh yeah. I'm good."
"You sure?" Kurt turned then, "Because you came down here right after eating. Normally you watch something with my dad."
Oh, this wasn't good. Kurt couldn't find out that Finn was making an epic mash-up of awesomness with him and Puck. "Oh yeah," Finn quickly thought of a reason, "Stomach ache?" He hoped it came out more as a sentence than a question.
"You want me to make you some tea?" Kurt asked, looking concerned, "It should settle your stomach."
"Sure." Finn said, giving a smile. As soon as Kurt was out the door, he flipped the notebook back open and stared at the pages. He had been best friends with Puck for years, he knew almost everything about that boy. Glancing at the door that Kurt could walk through any moment with a cup of tea, Finn realized he needed to know more about Kurt. Sure, they were friends and living together and since Finn was a total douche and basically called Kurt a very bad word that he'd never say again in his own room he'd been nicer and tried to make amends.
He had been bothered because he knew Kurt had a crush on him and then they were living together and he was there all the time and Finn got slightly worried. Only when he explained this to Kurt, the other boy scoffed and said he had gotten over him a long time ago. No crush. And Finn believed him, with the way Kurt said it? It was clear that only friendship was wanted from Kurt, not romance.
But the point was, even though he was living with Kurt, he didn't know much about the other boy. He needed to find out some facts so he could get him and Puck together. Yes, because they belonged together like double sided tape and whatever needed to be stuck one another. Just. Like. That.
Finn lazily wondered if some double sided tape would make his list more awesome.
Hearing footsteps come towards him, Finn closed the notebook and quickly hid it under the cushion of the chair. "Thanks dude." Kurt rolled his eyes and frowned, Finn knew he didn't like being called dude. "So, uh." Finn paused, unsure on how to go about asking these questions. Shrugging he just went for it, "What's your favorite kind of ice cream?"
Kurt blinked, "What?"
"What's your favorite kind of ice cream." He sipped on his tea. It was good, looking down at the cup he smiled. "This is good tea, man."
"Thanks." Kurt said slowly. Turning around he started back up on his skin care stuff.
Finn never understood why Kurt had to do this every night. Though he had to agree that since Kurt gave him that stuff for his T-Zone, his face has felt nicer. Absently he reached up and felt the skin between his eyes. "Right. Ice cream. Come on. Fess up."
"Vanilla." Kurt said after a pause.
"Vanilla?" Finn scratched his head. That was kinda plain. Rather unlike Kurt. Kurt wasn't plain. He was out there and different. And pretty awesome.
"I hardly ever eat it just as vanilla." Kurt replied, "I'll add hot fudge, caramel, strawberries, candy, y'know, something." He shrugged.
Not too long ago, Finn would have been surprised at how Kurt spoke of adding cookies to ice cream along with hot fudge, but since living with him, Finn found out that Kurt could out eat him. And that was a hard thing to do. He said it was because he had a high metabolism but as Finn had no idea what a metabolism was he didn't press the idea. "How 'bout gum. What's your favorite kind of gum?"
"The cinnamon kind."
"Y'know," Finn started, "You smell good all the time. What kind of shampoo do you use?"
Kurt's brows came together, "You know what kind of shampoo I use. We live in the same house."
"Oh," Finn grinned, "Right. Sorry." He paused, thinking up another question, "What's your favorite color?"
Kurt got up suddenly from his table, "I'm really tired. I'm going to bed now."
Finn frowned, "You didn't finish your face junk."
Kurt swallowed and got in bed, "Like I said, really tired." He turned around so that his back was to Finn. "Goodnight Finn."
"Night." Finn shrugged, maybe Kurt also had a stomachache.
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Glancing at his List of Awesomeness, Finn frowned, wondering how he could get Puck to see another side of Kurt. It was hard to get behind the walls of the smaller boy, but Finn really liked to see his non-Ice Queen persona.
Persona. Good word. Dating Rachel was helping his vocabulary a lot. He'd have to tell her he used that word. She's be proud of him and maybe let him touch her boobs.
Absently drawing a car on this side of his list (one of the few things he can draw without it looking like something from first grade) he got an idea. Cars. Yes. Kurt was good with cars and not many people knew that. If Puck saw how good Kurt was he'd be seeing another side and that'd be one step down on his Epic Plan.
But how?
After school, but before Puck got to his truck (Miss P. needed to talk to him about his anger problems - he'd beat up some bully over some reason), Finn opened the hood and looked at it. He had no idea what anything was except for the battery. That'd work.
Reaching in, Finn loosened the cable to the battery. It was still attached, that way Puck wouldn't look down and fix it himself. Grinning, he closed the hood and hid out nearby.
Puck was grumbling to himself as he got in the driver seat and Finn saw him hit the steering wheel and yelling before stepping back out. Deciding now was a good time, Finn came out from his hiding spot and walked up, "Hey, having car trouble?"
Puck glanced at Finn and nodded, "Yeah. It won't start." Lifting the hood he looked down.
Now Finn knew Puck, as previously mentioned, and he knew that Puck did not know much about cars. "Hey man." Finn shook his head, "Y'know, Kurt knows his stuff about engines and stuff. And well, he hasn't left yet as we kinda rode together." Puck was looking at Finn like he'd lost his mind, "We should have him take a gander at it and maybe he can fix it."
"Gander?" Puck asked, slight amusement found in his tone.
Finn shrugged, "Burt used the word the other day. Kinda got stuck in my head."
"Of course he did." Puck muttered under his breath, "Okay. When he gets here, we'll have 'em look."
It didn't take long for Kurt to show up. "Why are we clustered around the hunk of junk?"
Puck glared and Finn's heart sank. His plan would go more smoothly if Kurt didn't diss the man's truck. "She is not a hunk of junk."
Kurt rolled his eyes, "I know. But she's not my baby."
Puck shrugged. "You gonna fix her or not?"
"Keep your pants on." Kurt answered, taking off his scarf and handing it to Finn before rolling up his sleeves. "I'm not seeing anything right away, but I think-" his words got mumbled as he leaned down into the engine. His head popped up then and he held out his hand to Puck, "Gimme your pocket knife."
Puck sighed and dug in his pocket, "If Miss P. knew I had this on me, my meeting with her would've been a bit longer." And Finn was glad she didn't know otherwise he'd have had no way to keep Kurt here long enough to fix Puck's truck.
Kurt grabbed it and leaned over in the hood once more, muttering to himself. When he appeared again, his hair was dented a bit which made Finn think of that movie Rachel made him watch about Hairspray or Hair Goo or something. The one girl's hair had deflated some once and it looked weird. The dent in Kurt's hair wasn't exactly like the deflatedness but it was similar. "Your battery cable had been loose. I think that was the problem. Start her up and we'll see." He glared at his hands that were now rather dirty and before Puck started his truck, he grabbed a rag from inside and threw it at Kurt.
The truck started and Finn was very glad he didn't do any lasting damage to it.
Kurt shut the hood and handed the pocket knife back, keeping the rag before waving at Puck and walking to his Navigator. Finn paused outside of the truck, "That was nice of Kurt. Fixing it. He's a nice guy."
Puck's eyebrows furrowed in what Finn would've guessed as either confusion or anger. "Yeah, he can be." He nodded his head towards where Kurt walked off to, "Better go after him, or he'll leave your ass here."
Finn grinned and nodded, "See ya around dude."
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"Puck is comin' over." Finn said, sitting down next to Kurt on the sofa in their room, "We're gonna play some games. You joinin'?"
Kurt shrugged, looking up from his magazine, "What you guys playing?"
"Shooting games probably." Finn answered. "Y'know, those games that you are freakishly good at?"
Kurt smirked and closed the magazine, "Okay. Sure. Sounds like fun. I'll fetch us some drinks so that we won't have to pause the game except to use the bathroom."
"Sounds good, buddy." Finn grinned, glad that this part of the plan was working so far. Getting Puck and Kurt in the same room so that they can be PucKurt. When Kurt came back downstairs with a cooler full of soda, Puck came down with arms full of chips and cookies.
They played the games for a bit before Finn paused it, "I think I heard my mom calling my name." The other two shared a look of confusion, "I better go see what she wants."
"Finn," Kurt started, putting a hand on his arm to stop Finn from moving, "You're mom is getting groceries."
Cursing to himself, Finn knew Kurt was right, but shrugging he decided to cover it up, "She must be back and want some help brining the stuff in."
"We could all help." Puck suggested, setting his controller down.
"No, no, no." Finn said quickly, "You two play. It won't take long." Pausing he added, "Probably." as an after thought because he did plan on leaving the two of them down there for a while and he didn't want them to come looking for him. Giving a wave, Finn went upstairs and took out his homework. He hoped he'd be able to do most of it without Kurt's help.
After a few problems, Finn decided he would actually need Kurt's help on this to explain it and he didn't want to interrupt them. Texting Rachel he wanted to make sure it'd be okay if he showed up and after getting a reply, Finn left a note saying that he had apparently been hearing things and his mom hadn't been home after all but Rachel wanted to hang out. Placing the note on the table, Finn smiled and left quietly.
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Next step was for a double date. One that they wouldn't realize was a double date. Finn doodled on the side of his List of the Most Awesome Mash-Up Ever and thought about how he could do a fake yet real double date. Of course it was gonna be with him and Rachel and those two. Chewing on the pen, Finn wondered if he should tell Rachel The Plan of Epicness but decided against it. She might not approve or think he was crazy or tell them the plan. He knew they couldn't learn The Plan because then it's all blow up in his face. And not in a good way.
Maybe he could invite Kurt, Puck and Rachel and say that he'd forgotten that he'd invited the other two of the three of them? No. They wouldn't believe that. But maybe they'd believe it if it were a glee thing and no one besides the four of them showed up. Meet at the bowling alley. Yes. That's it.
Finn had rode with Kurt, of course, and they were the first ones at the bowling alley that night. Then Rachel showed up and sat next to Finn, as he knew she would. That meant that Puck would have to sit by Kurt. Because no one else was showing up. And indeed, when Puck showed up he sat next to Kurt, grumbling about something. Probably because of the fact that it was Kurt next to him.
"When is everyone else showing up?" Rachel asked, glancing at the clock. "They're late."
Finn put on his best Remembrance Face. "I forgot to say that it's just the four of us. No one else could make it." And enter Mopey Sad Face.
"You'd forgotten this fact?" Kurt raised an eyebrow, "Because I'm fairly certain I'd know if Mercedes had plans."
Finn blinked, "Oh. She must've, y'know." He paused, unsure, "Forgotten to tell you? Or thought she had?" Kurt didn't look like he was buying it. This wasn't good.
And Puck was staring at Finn. Openingly staring and said, "What does it matter? I think the four of us could have some fun. And you can talk to her tomorrow and ask what she ended up doing tonight." He'd been looking at Finn while talking to Kurt and Finn never liked it when people did stuff like that. It was weird.
"Yes," Rachel said, "lets have some fun. I also agree with Puck on this matter. The four of us can have a ball. Now, let's sort out our teams. Of course Finn and I are on a team and you two get to be on a team then. As for team names I think we could be names of Broadway plays-"
"Or," Finn said, "since we've only got two members to each team, we could mix our names together. Finnachel and," he paused, as if he was thinking about what Puck and Kurt's name would be.
"Purt?" Puck asked, throwing the word out with a disgusted look on his face.
"I will not be named Purt." Kurt stated.
"Okay," Finn said slowly, "How about PucKurt then? Your names seem to mesh better that way." He grinned, trying to look friendly.
Kurt shrugged and looked at Puck who nodded slowly.
"I guess I will agree to these team names." Rachel pouted and Finn started feeling bad that he didn't let her name their team after a Broadway play. But this was all apart of The Awesome Plan. It was an important step where Puck and Kurt realized that their names fit together and that it was clearly fate. Though through-out the night Finn realized he was the only one who called Puck by Puck; Rachel and Kurt both called him Noah.
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Finn learned from the night of bowling to try and not do a glee club night without inviting everyone. No one blamed him and he had (apparently) forgotten to tell the other members but Puck kept looking at Finn like he was trying to figure him out. And Kurt'd been acting strange too. Hoping that they were acting strange because they were realizing how much they belonged to each other, Finn had invited Puck over to swim. It was a warm Saturday and he'd managed to get Kurt to join them.
Finn didn't think that he should let them be by themselves again, they may start to suspect or Puck would leave. Or Kurt would go to something else. Instead he tried his best to make sure they weren't bickering. Which was hard to do. It was like they loved to bicker. But then in the middle of their arguing, they'd start laughing or they'd start having an actual conversation. Finn didn't understand it at all but figured he was one step closer to getting them to be a couple.
Kurt had gone inside to get drinks and after a second, Finn told Puck he was going to help. He'd hoped Puck would say he'd help Kurt but it didn't happen. While inside he'd just talk about how awesome Puck is.
Looking out of the window, Finn said, "Puck sure does look good today."
Kurt's head snapped up, "What?"
"Those swim trunks on him? And he'd shaved his head recently again. He looks good." Finn hoped he wouldn't have to build Puck's looks up more because he didn't want to talk about the fact that Puck is wet, has a nipple ring or his muscles. He just didn't want to go there.
Glancing at Kurt, Finn decided to face his soon-to-be-brother because Kurt was glaring at him and had his hands on his hips. Never a good sign. "Finn Hudson, are you eyeing my man?"
"You're - what?" Finn swallowed.
Kurt's voice was a little too calm for Finn's liking. He'd learned that when it came to the Hummels, a calm voice meant death. "My man. My boyfriend. Please tell me you aren't wanting to hit that because he's mine."
"He's - what?"
"Puck is my boyfriend." Kurt said slowly. "We've been boyfriends for months."
Finn's eyes grew. They'd what? Had his Epic Plan not been needed? "How - How did-?"
Kurt rolled his eyes, "I had walked up to Noah and told him that his fine ass wants my sweet ass."
Finn spluttered, "You told him - oh my God."
"But if Dad asks," Kurt started with a bored tone, "I had a sneaking suspicion that Noah liked me and I asked him out on a proper date." With that, Kurt had grabbed his drink and Puck's before going outside to his boyfriend.
Finn grinned because his Plan worked before it's time. Kurt and Puck had realized how Absolutely Awesome they were without his help. When he saw Kurt give Puck his drink, he told himself, "This wins so hard, I'm gonna do a victory dance."