Warning: ZaDr in all its lemony, yaoiness

Disclaimer: I do not own Invader Zim *sigh

Rated: M for extreme language, violence, drug use and slash

Synopsis: Dib finally gave up, on everything. The only one he can believe in is himself, the whole human race can just go to the Irken Empire for all he cares, hell he would even sell it to them if the price was right…

Dib ran a hand through his hair as he sat on the side of the bed. He grabbed his shirt and pulled it on.

"I thought you would want to stay the night." The girls voice was soft, quiet.

"No." He told her as he stood up and pulled his pants on.

"Will, will you call me tomorrow?"

"Sure." He lied, but they wanted to believe he would so he let them. Already he had forgotten her name. It was still early enough that he went to the bar, he wasn't twenty-one yet, but his fake ID looked good enough. It should, he paid enough for it. The place wasn't very crowed which was how he liked it, the weeknights never were. He found a place and drank until they closed.

He staggered home, he'd made this kind of trip one too many times, and it seemed like his feet knew the way. He actually lived in a better part of the neighborhood now. Thank god his apartment opened from his hand print, he didn't think he would have been able to use a key in this state. Though it wouldn't have been the first time, he couldn't count how many times he spent sleeping on the street because he couldn't open a fucking door.

When he reached his apartment door, he frowned. It seemed to be slightly opened and he gave it a push and it swung opened all the way.

"It's about time. Do you know how long I have been waiting for you?"

Dib eyes widened and he reached a hand to poke at the image in front of him.

"Uggg, and your drunk, you moron."

"What the hell? Gaz?"

"Ya it's me, you're still as smart as ever."

"What the fuck are you doing here? How did you get in here?"

"Oh please like that was hard for me." Gaz told him.

Dib groaned inside. He so did no want this conversation.

"Well since you know how to use the door, why don't you use it on your way out?"

Dib was just going to ignore her, he hadn't wanted anything to do with either of them for years and it hadn't changed. He pulled off his shirt and began walking to his room.

"What are you doing?"

"I'm going to bed. Now leave."

"Look Dib, I'm sorry, can we call a truce for a moment?"

"You? Sorry?" Dib laughed dryly "You made my life hell and you loved every minute of it."

Dib walked into his bathroom took his glasses off and splashed cold water into his face.

"Alright, I didn't come here for me okay, I came here because of Dad." She stood at the door watching him. He could only imagine what she was thinking. He gained a few good scars and some tattoos, especially the one that took up almost his entire back. It was his own personal demons trying to tear its way from himself.

"And I care why?" He grabbed a towel and wiped his face dry and turned around to face his sister. His arms crossed in front of his chest.

"He still cares about you, worries about you Dib, even if you're too stupid to see it."

Dib couldn't stop the laughter. "Oh god, that's a good one. Is that it? Is that all you have to say?"

"No, he doesn't even know I'm here." She paused a moment looking away, then she seemed to decide on something as she looked back at him "His being given an award, it's a big deal, and I know it would mean a lot if you would come."

"FORGET IT!" He shouted. Dib took a step towards Gaz but she held her ground and just glared up at him. "That fucker never did anything for me but make my life miserable, and you want me to go to some party that's going to honor him? Get out!"

"NO! You don't know what it's been like, how much you leaving hurt him, YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND ANYTHING!"

And then he saw something he never thought he'd see in his entire life. Gaz started to cry. She spun and grabbed her purse and keys from his couch. Maybe it was the whiskey that still coursed through his veins, or just the shock of seeing his scary sister cry. Dib ran and grabbed her before she got to the door.

"Alright, Jesus, I'm sorry." He muttered, he ran a hand up through his hair. It was getting too long and needed a cut soon.

She pulled away from him, wrapping her arms around herself, back to him. He supposed he could just lie to her, and then she could leave. He'd have to move of course, yet it seemed no matter where he went, Gaz would find him. That made him shudder.

"Fine, when is it?"

"You're lying."

"What?"

Gaz spun and pointed a finger at him. "You're lying."

He almost groaned.

"Gaz I just don't know if I can face him."

"If you show up to this, it will be the last thing I will ever ask of you. Come to this party, play the good son and you will never have to see us again."

It was all too tempting, one last trip down his miserable childhood to leave it forever.

"What are your terms?" Oh, he wasn't stupid enough to let Gaz set the rules, she played dirty too.

"One month, staying at the house, helping Dad."

Hell no.

"Two weeks, no cooking, you do my laundry and no promises with Dad."

"Fine two weeks, fix your own damn meals, do your own laundry, and as long as you make Dad happy I don't care."

Dib waited a heartbeat, there wasn't much to think about. After this he wouldn't have to worry about that part of his life anymore.

"Deal."

Gaz grinned at him, making him a little suspicious about the whole tear episode.

"Good, see you on Monday then."

"What? That's only four days away, I have a job you know."

Gaz snorted and scowled at him, "Ya, I'm sure your precious hacking job can be done just about anywhere, along with whatever it is your dealing in now."

Dib shouldn't have been surprised she knew about his illegal activities. What else was a kid supposed to do when he already had a police record before getting out of grade skool?

"See you Monday Dib." Gaz left him feeling cold and too sober for his taste. He went to the fridge and pulled out whatever he had in there, which was just beer. Damn, it was going be a long night and it was already three a.m.

a/n: umm ya, if any of you have read my other stories, i just can't help it, I love the troubled dark side O_o